Class of November 2015 Part 4
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Europe
Posts: 259
SilentCinemaFan, sounds like you are making some really good changes in your life!
Turning in that application and getting back to doing creative work sounds like a great idea! I am also starting doing things I used to like again, before drinking became my only hobby.
Sounds like you are on a good road!
Turning in that application and getting back to doing creative work sounds like a great idea! I am also starting doing things I used to like again, before drinking became my only hobby.
Sounds like you are on a good road!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 154
Originally Posted by Dallow 
learntofly, I am on the same road, trying to beat depression in the same way. I have been hesitating to get some prescription because I don't want to get hooked on something else, but I don't know.
I started off exercising every day, but that didn't last so long. Have to force myself to go now. Most days I just feel low, like everything I do is pointless.
Maybe it's just what we have to go through to find a better tomorrow. At this point I find it so hard to seperate my "real feelings" to those that comes with recovery.
All I know is I prefer to feel this low, than go back to that desperate drunk I was! No drinks!!!
I started off exercising every day, but that didn't last so long. Have to force myself to go now. Most days I just feel low, like everything I do is pointless.
Maybe it's just what we have to go through to find a better tomorrow. At this point I find it so hard to seperate my "real feelings" to those that comes with recovery.
All I know is I prefer to feel this low, than go back to that desperate drunk I was! No drinks!!!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Southern California
Posts: 690
Originally Posted by patricia68
Today was a better day 
I think my 5htp supplements are starting to kick in. No depression at all today. Quite the opposite, I had this burst of energy so I decided to clean the house and prep meals for the week.
I had lots of anxiety though. Mostly because my husband was home all day and was again in a horrible mood. I'm trying to change my reaction to his midlife crisis or whatever it is that he's going through. I'm trying to focus on my own happiness and give him space.
And a cup of chamomile tea before bedtime is happiness right now
I think my 5htp supplements are starting to kick in. No depression at all today. Quite the opposite, I had this burst of energy so I decided to clean the house and prep meals for the week.
I had lots of anxiety though. Mostly because my husband was home all day and was again in a horrible mood. I'm trying to change my reaction to his midlife crisis or whatever it is that he's going through. I'm trying to focus on my own happiness and give him space.
And a cup of chamomile tea before bedtime is happiness right now
Can you send a list again of what supplements you're taking? I went to the doctor and he started me on a medication and I've gained 5 pounds in 5 days...Talk about depressing! Lol. I've been really down since then and want to try something natural instead.
My cravings are pretty minimal, but the irritability is getting me and the whole family down and weight gain does not help!
thanks
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Southern California
Posts: 690
Originally Posted by KiKi0615
Good Tuesday morning and WELCOME TO DECEMBER!!!(12/1/15) :-)
:-) Welcome FacingFuture to the class!
*****NOTE*****
Some people don't like to count days. If anyone wants me to take them off this list or just put something generic liked Jsbodhi has below, no problem!!! OH and send me a PRIVATE MESSAGE if I need to change anything. :-)
We are STRONGER TOGETHER!!!
Canguy -23 days
HealthyGoals -16 days
Me (KiKi) -16 days
Patricia -? days
StrangeAngel- 4 days
Pams -16 days
GoldenSands -17 days
CurlyGirl -26 days
KeepNitreal -24 days
BlackBirdFly -17 days
Noolan -12 days
SwimKim - 7 days
MeShelly -17 days
Thumbelina -32 days
Lisa247 -11 days
WalkTheLine-11 days
Supertired -6 days
Jsbodhi - "in between 30 days somewhere" :-)
Max74 -31 days
DariaM -11 days
ForeverFuzzy -12 days
BadSneakers -22 days
Jemma44 -23 days
Blondsober -9 days
Snowvelvet -27 days
GoldCoastGirl -10 days
Rivelino -10 days
TheRake -10 days
Badger257 -17 days
Odelle -10 days
Tufty13 -30 days
TryinginTexas - 17 days
Onetimeless -25 days
Dallow - 9 days
Learntofly -38 days
Faithfulandfree - 3 day
Tootsiesdad -23 days
SoberMarathon -9 days
Introspectator- 16 days
RedAndy -17 days
Jackie1214 -8 days
Neverthought - ? days
Rah555 -8 days
Alphonse -14 days
amitranjan04 -7 days
ultradad -11 days
SoulPower89 - ? days
got2stopnow -9 days
Fabat50 -24 days
Enfinthechange -4 days
SilentCinemaFan -4 days
SunnyDenver -9 days
VanillaChaiTea -4 days
Lily76 -4 days
Deniselarkin -4 days
Emma99- 4 days
Augusta1893 -4 days
Determined82 -4 Days
JL2014 - ? days
Chicklet -7 days
Mish - ? days
Missy7 -4 days
Richmahogany -7 days
Paul37 -3 days
Tatersalad -4 days
FacingFuture-? days -Welcome!!!
66 CLASSMATES!
*REMEMBER-all we REALLY have is TODAY...this 24 hours. It's not a race. There is no shame in starting over as long as we NEVER GIVE UP!!! There is no graduation; just a wonderful journey into the happiness and amazing life we all deserve...
:-) Welcome FacingFuture to the class!
*****NOTE*****
Some people don't like to count days. If anyone wants me to take them off this list or just put something generic liked Jsbodhi has below, no problem!!! OH and send me a PRIVATE MESSAGE if I need to change anything. :-)
We are STRONGER TOGETHER!!!
Canguy -23 days
HealthyGoals -16 days
Me (KiKi) -16 days
Patricia -? days
StrangeAngel- 4 days
Pams -16 days
GoldenSands -17 days
CurlyGirl -26 days
KeepNitreal -24 days
BlackBirdFly -17 days
Noolan -12 days
SwimKim - 7 days
MeShelly -17 days
Thumbelina -32 days
Lisa247 -11 days
WalkTheLine-11 days
Supertired -6 days
Jsbodhi - "in between 30 days somewhere" :-)
Max74 -31 days
DariaM -11 days
ForeverFuzzy -12 days
BadSneakers -22 days
Jemma44 -23 days
Blondsober -9 days
Snowvelvet -27 days
GoldCoastGirl -10 days
Rivelino -10 days
TheRake -10 days
Badger257 -17 days
Odelle -10 days
Tufty13 -30 days
TryinginTexas - 17 days
Onetimeless -25 days
Dallow - 9 days
Learntofly -38 days
Faithfulandfree - 3 day
Tootsiesdad -23 days
SoberMarathon -9 days
Introspectator- 16 days
RedAndy -17 days
Jackie1214 -8 days
Neverthought - ? days
Rah555 -8 days
Alphonse -14 days
amitranjan04 -7 days
ultradad -11 days
SoulPower89 - ? days
got2stopnow -9 days
Fabat50 -24 days
Enfinthechange -4 days
SilentCinemaFan -4 days
SunnyDenver -9 days
VanillaChaiTea -4 days
Lily76 -4 days
Deniselarkin -4 days
Emma99- 4 days
Augusta1893 -4 days
Determined82 -4 Days
JL2014 - ? days
Chicklet -7 days
Mish - ? days
Missy7 -4 days
Richmahogany -7 days
Paul37 -3 days
Tatersalad -4 days
FacingFuture-? days -Welcome!!!
66 CLASSMATES!
*REMEMBER-all we REALLY have is TODAY...this 24 hours. It's not a race. There is no shame in starting over as long as we NEVER GIVE UP!!! There is no graduation; just a wonderful journey into the happiness and amazing life we all deserve...
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,075
Originally Posted by Keepnitreal
hi Patricia-
Can you send a list again of what supplements you're taking? I went to the doctor and he started me on a medication and I've gained 5 pounds in 5 days...Talk about depressing! Lol. I've been really down since then and want to try something natural instead.
My cravings are pretty minimal, but the irritability is getting me and the whole family down and weight gain does not help!thanks
Can you send a list again of what supplements you're taking? I went to the doctor and he started me on a medication and I've gained 5 pounds in 5 days...Talk about depressing! Lol. I've been really down since then and want to try something natural instead.
My cravings are pretty minimal, but the irritability is getting me and the whole family down and weight gain does not help!
thanksIt took me about a week to see some improvement, but it's getting a little better every day
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Posts: 59
Originally Posted by pams
Good morning Class!
I am so thankful for all of you. With all your help I have come to a conclusion about the work Xmas party on Saturday. I am skipping it this year. My AV has been trying to trick me. For lots of years I have not really wanted to attend the party (like 8 or 9 years)and only did out of obligation. Last year was a complete write off, I was home puking by 10pm. The year before there wasn't a party, but three yeas ago I did a face plant in some bar after the party, fell off the speaker I was dancing on and ended up all banged up. I barely remember all that. Good times.
So why in God's name am I struggling so much about this year? I 'should' feel the same way I have the last 8 or 9 years...mostly the same people, same place, same activities etc. I should be dreading it and whining about not wanting to go like I usually am.
I had a rough time for awhile after work yesterday. My AV was being the voice of reason (insert eye roll)....telling me to just screw up right now and then this complicated decision about the party is made and you cant start over on Monday.
So. I am taking the party out of the equation. I am not going.
I am so thankful for all of you. With all your help I have come to a conclusion about the work Xmas party on Saturday. I am skipping it this year. My AV has been trying to trick me. For lots of years I have not really wanted to attend the party (like 8 or 9 years)and only did out of obligation. Last year was a complete write off, I was home puking by 10pm. The year before there wasn't a party, but three yeas ago I did a face plant in some bar after the party, fell off the speaker I was dancing on and ended up all banged up. I barely remember all that. Good times.
So why in God's name am I struggling so much about this year? I 'should' feel the same way I have the last 8 or 9 years...mostly the same people, same place, same activities etc. I should be dreading it and whining about not wanting to go like I usually am.
I had a rough time for awhile after work yesterday. My AV was being the voice of reason (insert eye roll)....telling me to just screw up right now and then this complicated decision about the party is made and you cant start over on Monday.
So. I am taking the party out of the equation. I am not going.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: Southern California
Posts: 690
Originally Posted by Dallow
learntofly, I am on the same road, trying to beat depression in the same way. I have been hesitating to get some prescription because I don't want to get hooked on something else, but I don't know.
I started off exercising every day, but that didn't last so long. Have to force myself to go now. Most days I just feel low, like everything I do is pointless.
Maybe it's just what we have to go through to find a better tomorrow. At this point I find it so hard to seperate my "real feelings" to those that comes with recovery.
All I know is I prefer to feel this low, than go back to that desperate drunk I was! No drinks!!!
I started off exercising every day, but that didn't last so long. Have to force myself to go now. Most days I just feel low, like everything I do is pointless.
Maybe it's just what we have to go through to find a better tomorrow. At this point I find it so hard to seperate my "real feelings" to those that comes with recovery.
All I know is I prefer to feel this low, than go back to that desperate drunk I was! No drinks!!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: UK
Posts: 123
Ooh a new home - glad the link was in the December thread.
Day 27. Already been to a lunchtime meeting and will be going this evening to a step 11 prayer and meditation.
No real reason, not craving or thinking of it, but just wanted to connect in rl.
Take care class! Kxx
Day 27. Already been to a lunchtime meeting and will be going this evening to a step 11 prayer and meditation.
No real reason, not craving or thinking of it, but just wanted to connect in rl.
Take care class! Kxx
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 154
Originally Posted by Keepnitreal
Dallow--it's hard to know which came first...the depression or the alcohol! At least for me. I think depression. Anyway, I went to the doctor and started medicine and it hasn't helped yet, in fact I have been gaining a pound a day and that is really getting me depressed! I work out at least 5 days a week and have been trying really hard to eat clean, but now I'm in a funk and can't get the energy to do either. 24 days sober and I'm crying now! I think it's the medication so I will taper off and let the doctor know my reaction. I think I will try Patrciia's regimine. On the plus side....no alcohol cravings!!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Europe
Posts: 259
Pams and Keepnitreal, thanks for sharing! I also find it hard to know which came first, I think the depression, but alcohol certainly made it worse. And now I am not sure what is normal anymore.
I think I will start trying the natural herbs but if it doesn't work, I agree with you pams, better to try different medications than to keep going like this. Because in the long run I guess it could make me relapse. As long as we keep moving forward!
I think I will start trying the natural herbs but if it doesn't work, I agree with you pams, better to try different medications than to keep going like this. Because in the long run I guess it could make me relapse. As long as we keep moving forward!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 543
Dallow, I felt the same way this morning. I was thinking what's the point, why am I even bothering. It's such a slow progress and I want to see results now. But I pushed myself knowing that I would feel worse if I didn’t go.
I believe that exercise has helped me the most in staying sober for the most part. I really do feel better after a workout for the whole day. And it goes by so fast. The hardest part is just getting out the door.
Exercise is the best medicine.
Day 17. =D
One day at a time. <3
I believe that exercise has helped me the most in staying sober for the most part. I really do feel better after a workout for the whole day. And it goes by so fast. The hardest part is just getting out the door.
Exercise is the best medicine.
Day 17. =D
One day at a time. <3
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,551
Just sent hubby off for his work trip. I have testing today for school and work tonight. Sleep tomorrow.
I have about $5 in the bank.
Blessing in disguise as I'm too broke to give into AV while he's away. Take that you jerk!
I'm feeling really good about sobriety. Going to dust off the elliptical today and start working towards getting my healthy body back.
Pams smart choice on the party.
Congrats on grad school... forgot who said it.
Welcome home ultra dad!
Want to respond to all! No time must study!
Take care everyone
I have about $5 in the bank.
Blessing in disguise as I'm too broke to give into AV while he's away. Take that you jerk!I'm feeling really good about sobriety. Going to dust off the elliptical today and start working towards getting my healthy body back.
Pams smart choice on the party.
Congrats on grad school... forgot who said it.
Welcome home ultra dad!
Want to respond to all! No time must study!
Take care everyone
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 134
Originally Posted by Keepnitreal
Dallow--it's hard to know which came first...the depression or the alcohol! At least for me. I think depression. Anyway, I went to the doctor and started medicine and it hasn't helped yet, in fact I have been gaining a pound a day and that is really getting me depressed! I work out at least 5 days a week and have been trying really hard to eat clean, but now I'm in a funk and can't get the energy to do either. 24 days sober and I'm crying now! I think it's the medication so I will taper off and let the doctor know my reaction. I think I will try Patrciia's regimine. On the plus side....no alcohol cravings!!!
I got on antidepressants a few years ago and it (a) made me feel tons better, and (b) helped me kick booze - twice. You are thinking "uh oh, he said twice."
I'm definitely glad I went on them. But a couple of things to beware of. Antidepressants mean you can drink a ton. Imagine alcohol, with all of the "upside" and good feelings, but no depressant effect. You don't get sleepy or tired. You can VERY EASILY drink to the point of blackout without realizing it.
Also, antidepressants work to peel back layers. You don't feel "depressed," but then you have new things to deal with. And those new things can make you want to drink. (And remember, when you do, you can easily overdo it.)
So antidepressants are miracle drugs. But they can be really dangerous if you have a tendency to drink. So go into it with your eyes open . . .
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Europe
Posts: 259
I am spamming you today, I just seem to be overwhelmed with anxiety today.
My thoughts are spinning around and I am just thinking of all the people I am sure have noticed I have been drunk, but never said anything. I mean I know I have acted really strange in many situations these last years.
The only way for me to make people trust me again, is to stay sober. I know this, and I know it takes time. Just feeling very sick of myself and how I let myself sink this low. I just want to hide and never show my face to the world again.
Not craving a drink, just need to get it out of my chest. And it seems you guys are the only ones who really understand where I am coming from. Thank you for that.
My thoughts are spinning around and I am just thinking of all the people I am sure have noticed I have been drunk, but never said anything. I mean I know I have acted really strange in many situations these last years.
The only way for me to make people trust me again, is to stay sober. I know this, and I know it takes time. Just feeling very sick of myself and how I let myself sink this low. I just want to hide and never show my face to the world again.
Not craving a drink, just need to get it out of my chest. And it seems you guys are the only ones who really understand where I am coming from. Thank you for that.
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1,174
Morning all,
.......here we are in a new place. Its good. Just checking in, new month, midweek, all's quiet.
For what it's worth...for me alcohol causes depression, what as young guy's we used to dismiss as 'boozer's gloom'. It becomes a spiral of cause and effect. You're down because hungover you feel like s***t. Feeling like that you can't engage, achieve, do.....which makes you feel down.....drink.....temp improvement before the cycle repeats again. Around and around. The last few years I found that it manifested itself in obsessive thinking about some significant life events of 2007-12....just going over the past again and again. Getting sober is the only way I can escape a pattern of thinking that literally traps me in the past. Being off alcohol literally allows me to create a present.
Psychologically a huge improvement. Needing this is what keeps me trying to stay sober. Drinking destroys present and future and fixes me back there.
Anyway.
Wishin us all a sober day for Kiki to add to the tallies........will check in at the other end of the day. All the best everybody.
.......here we are in a new place. Its good. Just checking in, new month, midweek, all's quiet.
For what it's worth...for me alcohol causes depression, what as young guy's we used to dismiss as 'boozer's gloom'. It becomes a spiral of cause and effect. You're down because hungover you feel like s***t. Feeling like that you can't engage, achieve, do.....which makes you feel down.....drink.....temp improvement before the cycle repeats again. Around and around. The last few years I found that it manifested itself in obsessive thinking about some significant life events of 2007-12....just going over the past again and again. Getting sober is the only way I can escape a pattern of thinking that literally traps me in the past. Being off alcohol literally allows me to create a present.
Psychologically a huge improvement. Needing this is what keeps me trying to stay sober. Drinking destroys present and future and fixes me back there.
Anyway.
Wishin us all a sober day for Kiki to add to the tallies........will check in at the other end of the day. All the best everybody.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Centry fl
Posts: 214
If you are looking for something to deal with depression try st. John's wort you can get it from the Walmart the drugstore other herbs store over the counter everyone should try milk thistle and dandelion root to help repair and rebuild of liver cells, I recommend you look them up and research them online google them.
H hello everybody I hope your day is going well I am at work for another 12 hour shift I feel good not depressed still.
Looking forward to many more better days everyone enjoy the rest of your day I will check in tonight after work
H hello everybody I hope your day is going well I am at work for another 12 hour shift I feel good not depressed still.
Looking forward to many more better days everyone enjoy the rest of your day I will check in tonight after work
Member
Join Date: Sep 2015
Location: maine
Posts: 204
Dallow - I could have written your post. The only action we can take is to remain sober and present. It's what we must do and others might notice and if they don't, we still have to remain sober and present.
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