DAY 59 - Drunk Dreams - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Every day is a new day, that's what I keep telling myself. The struggle is real. I'm in deep with this addiction to wine. I am searching for the answer how to turn it off. I feel lucky if I can keep it down to a daily minimum of just one bottle. I pray to God to take this addiction away. Some days I'm a fighter. Other days are a bit more challenging. Hopefully by putting this out there, starting today, I can find a new hope and believe in myself again.

LoveHateMerlot
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DAY 59 - Drunk Dreams

Posted 02-26-2019 at 07:24 AM by LoveHateMerlot
Tags dreams , drunk , mom , wine , wino

Have you ever had a dream (or nightmare) where you have given up on your sobriety and gave into a drink? I keep having those dreams. Last night I was wasted drunk in my dream and having a great time at a resort on a beach. Drink after drink, dancing and laughing and having a "what the hell" attitude. I didn't feel any remorse or regret in my dream. I wasn't worried about consequences. I didn't care that I was embarrassing myself. It was so vivid, like I still feel it actually happened. I wake up from these dreams in the morning, I first start panicking and immediately have a burst of shame and guilt. It doesn't last long, before I realize it was all just a dream. I'm sober. I have been sober for 59 days. I calm myself by chanting that mantra. It was just a dream.

I believe that our dreams are significant. I know that after experiencing those types of dreams, I don't want to go back. It makes me cringe. That 42 year old drunk lady dancing around in her bikini like she is 22 in my dream is not something I strive to be. Lindsay Lohan "wanna be". Just sad. It is just enough fuel to help me stay strong today. Today.
Posted in Diary of Wino
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