"Living Sober" book study part 1
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
"Living Sober" book study part 1
AA has a book called Living Sober which contains very little mention of god or any kind of spirituality. It's a practical primer on practical things we can do to help us stay sober. I'll post a few paragraphs each day from the PDFs available on the AA website.
Please feel free to comment.
NOTE:
Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. (“AAWS”) does not grant permission to reprint segments of its literature online, with the exception of overseas A.A. General Service Offices.
Please do not post material containing AA copyrighted literature. Posts violating copyrights will be removed.
You are allowed to link to literature on the AA site as long as you post the following disclaimer with your link:
Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Please feel free to comment.
NOTE:
Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. (“AAWS”) does not grant permission to reprint segments of its literature online, with the exception of overseas A.A. General Service Offices.
Please do not post material containing AA copyrighted literature. Posts violating copyrights will be removed.
You are allowed to link to literature on the AA site as long as you post the following disclaimer with your link:
Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Living Sober
“. . . Treatment primarily involves not taking a drink . . . .” American Medical Association Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., New York
Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., New York
LIVING SOBER Copyright © 2019 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher. First Printing, 1975 Fifty-second Printing, 2020 This is A.A. General Service Conference-approved literature Mail address: Box 459, Grand Central Station New York, NY 10163 www.aa.org Alcoholics Anonymous ® and A.A. ® are registered trademarks of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. Library of Congress Catalog Card No. 75-328-153 ISBN 978-0-916856-04-5 Printed in the United States of America 120M – 2/20 (WR) B-7
“. . . Treatment primarily involves not taking a drink . . . .” American Medical Association Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., New York
Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., New York
LIVING SOBER Copyright © 2019 by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher. First Printing, 1975 Fifty-second Printing, 2020 This is A.A. General Service Conference-approved literature Mail address: Box 459, Grand Central Station New York, NY 10163 www.aa.org Alcoholics Anonymous ® and A.A. ® are registered trademarks of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. Library of Congress Catalog Card No. 75-328-153 ISBN 978-0-916856-04-5 Printed in the United States of America 120M – 2/20 (WR) B-7
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
About that title...
Even the words “stay sober”—let alone live sober—offended many of us when we first heard such advice. Although we had done a lot of drinking, many of us never felt drunk, and were sure we almost never appeared or sounded drunk. Many of us never staggered, fell, or got thick tongues; many others were never disorderly, never missed a day at work, never had automobile accidents, and certainly were never hospitalized nor jailed for drunkenness.
We knew lots of people who drank more than we did, and people who could not handle their drinks at all. We were not like that. So the suggestion that maybe we should “stay sober” was almost insulting.
Besides, it seemed unnecessarily drastic. How could we live that way? Surely, there was nothing wrong with a cocktail or two at a business lunch or before dinner. Wasn’t everyone entitled to relax with a few drinks, or have a couple of beers before going to bed?
However, after we learned some of the facts about the illness called alcoholism, our opinions shifted. Our eyes have been opened to the fact that apparently millions of people have the disease of alcoholism. Medical science does not explain its “cause,” but medical experts on alcoholism assure us that any drinking at all leads to trouble for the alcoholic, or problem, drinker. Our experience overwhelmingly confirms this.
So not drinking at all—that is, staying sober—becomes the basis of recovery from alcoholism. And let it be emphasized: Living sober turns out to be not at all grim, boring, and uncomfortable, as we had feared, but rather something we begin to enjoy and find much more exciting than our drinking days. We’ll show you how.
Even the words “stay sober”—let alone live sober—offended many of us when we first heard such advice. Although we had done a lot of drinking, many of us never felt drunk, and were sure we almost never appeared or sounded drunk. Many of us never staggered, fell, or got thick tongues; many others were never disorderly, never missed a day at work, never had automobile accidents, and certainly were never hospitalized nor jailed for drunkenness.
We knew lots of people who drank more than we did, and people who could not handle their drinks at all. We were not like that. So the suggestion that maybe we should “stay sober” was almost insulting.
Besides, it seemed unnecessarily drastic. How could we live that way? Surely, there was nothing wrong with a cocktail or two at a business lunch or before dinner. Wasn’t everyone entitled to relax with a few drinks, or have a couple of beers before going to bed?
However, after we learned some of the facts about the illness called alcoholism, our opinions shifted. Our eyes have been opened to the fact that apparently millions of people have the disease of alcoholism. Medical science does not explain its “cause,” but medical experts on alcoholism assure us that any drinking at all leads to trouble for the alcoholic, or problem, drinker. Our experience overwhelmingly confirms this.
So not drinking at all—that is, staying sober—becomes the basis of recovery from alcoholism. And let it be emphasized: Living sober turns out to be not at all grim, boring, and uncomfortable, as we had feared, but rather something we begin to enjoy and find much more exciting than our drinking days. We’ll show you how.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
“Living Sober” - Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Why ‘not drinking’? We members of Alcoholics Anonymous see the answer to that question when we look honestly at our own past lives. Our experience clearly proves that any drinking at all leads to serious trouble for the alcoholic, or problem drinker. In the words of the American Medical Association:
Alcohol, aside from its addictive qualities, also has a psychological effect that modifies thinking and reasoning. One drink can change the thinking of an alcoholic so that he feels he can tolerate another, and then another, and another. . . . The alcoholic can learn to completely control his disease, but the affliction cannot be cured so that he can return to alcohol without adverse consequences.*
And we repeat: Somewhat to our surprise, staying sober turns out not to be the grim, wet-blanket experience we had expected! While we were drinking, a life without alcohol seemed like no life at all. But for most members of A.A., living sober is really living—a joyous experience. We much prefer it to the troubles we had with drinking.
One more note: anyone can get sober. We have all done it lots of times. The trick is to stay and to live sober. That is what this booklet is about.
*From an official statement issued July 31, 1964
Why ‘not drinking’? We members of Alcoholics Anonymous see the answer to that question when we look honestly at our own past lives. Our experience clearly proves that any drinking at all leads to serious trouble for the alcoholic, or problem drinker. In the words of the American Medical Association:
Alcohol, aside from its addictive qualities, also has a psychological effect that modifies thinking and reasoning. One drink can change the thinking of an alcoholic so that he feels he can tolerate another, and then another, and another. . . . The alcoholic can learn to completely control his disease, but the affliction cannot be cured so that he can return to alcohol without adverse consequences.*
And we repeat: Somewhat to our surprise, staying sober turns out not to be the grim, wet-blanket experience we had expected! While we were drinking, a life without alcohol seemed like no life at all. But for most members of A.A., living sober is really living—a joyous experience. We much prefer it to the troubles we had with drinking.
One more note: anyone can get sober. We have all done it lots of times. The trick is to stay and to live sober. That is what this booklet is about.
*From an official statement issued July 31, 1964
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,521
Well, I am in, dear Patcha, because that is and always will be one of my favourite AA texts. I even brought my original copy (from 1993) with me when I moved here. And my BB as well. 
Living Sober opened my eyes to the joy that life could actually be....I loved that book. A paragraph a day in the early days would give me some basic wisdom and the strength to get through the day sober.
Living Sober opened my eyes to the joy that life could actually be....I loved that book. A paragraph a day in the early days would give me some basic wisdom and the strength to get through the day sober.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Living Sober - Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Page 1
1 Using this booklet
This booklet does not offer a plan for recovery from alcoholism. The Alcoholics Anonymous Steps that summarize its program of recovery are set forth in detail in the books Alcoholics Anonymous and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. Those Steps are not interpreted here, nor are the processes they cover discussed in this booklet.
Here, we tell only some methods we have used for living without drinking. You are welcome to all of them, whether you are interested in Alcoholics Anonymous or not.
Our drinking was connected with many habits—big and little. Some of them were thinking habits, or things we felt inside ourselves. Others were doing habits—things we did, actions we took.
In getting used to not drinking, we have found that we needed new habits to take the place of those old ones.
(For example, instead of taking that next drink—the one in your hand or the one you’ve been planning on—can you just postpone it until you read to the bottom of page 6? Sip some soda or fruit juice, instead of an alcoholic beverage, while you read. A little later, we’ll explain more fully what’s behind this change in habits.)
Page 1
1 Using this booklet
This booklet does not offer a plan for recovery from alcoholism. The Alcoholics Anonymous Steps that summarize its program of recovery are set forth in detail in the books Alcoholics Anonymous and Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions. Those Steps are not interpreted here, nor are the processes they cover discussed in this booklet.
Here, we tell only some methods we have used for living without drinking. You are welcome to all of them, whether you are interested in Alcoholics Anonymous or not.
Our drinking was connected with many habits—big and little. Some of them were thinking habits, or things we felt inside ourselves. Others were doing habits—things we did, actions we took.
In getting used to not drinking, we have found that we needed new habits to take the place of those old ones.
(For example, instead of taking that next drink—the one in your hand or the one you’ve been planning on—can you just postpone it until you read to the bottom of page 6? Sip some soda or fruit juice, instead of an alcoholic beverage, while you read. A little later, we’ll explain more fully what’s behind this change in habits.)
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Living Sober - Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Page 1 continued
After we spent a few months practicing these new, sober habits or ways of acting and thinking, they became almost second nature to most of us, as drinking used to be. Not drinking has become natural and easy, not a long, dreary struggle.
These practical, hour-by-hour methods can easily be used at home, at work, or in social gatherings. Also included here are several things we have learned not to do, or to avoid. These were things that, we now see, once tempted us to drink or otherwise endangered our recovery.
We think you’ll find many or even all of the suggestions discussed here valuable in living sober, with comfort and ease. There is nothing significant about the order in which the booklet presents them. They can be rearranged in any way you like that works. Nor is this a complete listing. Practically every A.A. member you meet can give you at least one more good idea not mentioned here. And you will probably come up with brand-new ones that work for you. We hope you pass them on to others who can also profit by them.
A.A. as a fellowship does not formally endorse nor recommend for all alcoholics every line of action included here. But each practice mentioned has proved useful to some members, and may be helpful to you.
This booklet is planned as a handy manual for consulting from time to time, not something to be read straight through just once, then forgotten.
Page 1 continued
After we spent a few months practicing these new, sober habits or ways of acting and thinking, they became almost second nature to most of us, as drinking used to be. Not drinking has become natural and easy, not a long, dreary struggle.
These practical, hour-by-hour methods can easily be used at home, at work, or in social gatherings. Also included here are several things we have learned not to do, or to avoid. These were things that, we now see, once tempted us to drink or otherwise endangered our recovery.
We think you’ll find many or even all of the suggestions discussed here valuable in living sober, with comfort and ease. There is nothing significant about the order in which the booklet presents them. They can be rearranged in any way you like that works. Nor is this a complete listing. Practically every A.A. member you meet can give you at least one more good idea not mentioned here. And you will probably come up with brand-new ones that work for you. We hope you pass them on to others who can also profit by them.
A.A. as a fellowship does not formally endorse nor recommend for all alcoholics every line of action included here. But each practice mentioned has proved useful to some members, and may be helpful to you.
This booklet is planned as a handy manual for consulting from time to time, not something to be read straight through just once, then forgotten.
Your attitude, not your aptitude, will determine your altitude
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Oxnard (The Nard), CA, USA.
Posts: 13,966
Thanks Patcha.
I had that book and "as Bill sees it". Nice to see it book posted here. Is the book more secular, I forgot?
I like where an AA guy asked a Buddhist monk about his practice and how God might fit in. The monk's reply "Good" is a sufficient replacement for God. I felt better about being an AA member afterward. My problem was no one that I knew was practicing AA as a Buddhist in the various meeting I was attending. I felt left out. Eventually stopped going to AA and quit doing 12 step recovery..
I had that book and "as Bill sees it". Nice to see it book posted here. Is the book more secular, I forgot?
I like where an AA guy asked a Buddhist monk about his practice and how God might fit in. The monk's reply "Good" is a sufficient replacement for God. I felt better about being an AA member afterward. My problem was no one that I knew was practicing AA as a Buddhist in the various meeting I was attending. I felt left out. Eventually stopped going to AA and quit doing 12 step recovery..
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Here are two cautions which have proved helpful: A. Keep an open mind. Perhaps some of the suggestions offered here will not appeal to you. If that is the case, we have found that, instead of rejecting them forever, it’s a better idea to just set them aside for the time being. If we don’t close our minds to them permanently, we can always go back later on and try out ideas we didn’t like before—if we want to.
For instance, some of us found that, in our initial nondrinking days, the suggestions and comradeship offered by an A.A. sponsor helped us greatly to stay sober. Others of us waited until we had visited many groups and met many A.A.’s before we finally called on a sponsor’s help.
Some of us found formal prayer a strong aid in not drinking, while others fled from anything that suggested religion. But all of us are free to change our minds on these ideas later if we choose.
Many of us found that the sooner we started work on the Twelve Steps offered as a program of recovery in the book Alcoholics Anonymous, the better. Others of us felt the need to postpone this until we had been sober a little while.
Here are two cautions which have proved helpful: A. Keep an open mind. Perhaps some of the suggestions offered here will not appeal to you. If that is the case, we have found that, instead of rejecting them forever, it’s a better idea to just set them aside for the time being. If we don’t close our minds to them permanently, we can always go back later on and try out ideas we didn’t like before—if we want to.
For instance, some of us found that, in our initial nondrinking days, the suggestions and comradeship offered by an A.A. sponsor helped us greatly to stay sober. Others of us waited until we had visited many groups and met many A.A.’s before we finally called on a sponsor’s help.
Some of us found formal prayer a strong aid in not drinking, while others fled from anything that suggested religion. But all of us are free to change our minds on these ideas later if we choose.
Many of us found that the sooner we started work on the Twelve Steps offered as a program of recovery in the book Alcoholics Anonymous, the better. Others of us felt the need to postpone this until we had been sober a little while.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Living Sober
Page 2 continued
The point is, there is no prescribed A.A. “right” way or “wrong” way. Each of us uses what is best for himself or herself—without closing the door on other kinds of help we may find valuable at another time. And each of us tries to respect others’ rights to do things differently. Sometimes, an A.A. member will talk about taking the various parts of the program in cafeteria style—selecting what he likes and letting alone what he does not want. Maybe others will come along and pick up the unwanted parts—or maybe that member himself will go back later and take some of the ideas he previously rejected. However, it is good to remember the temptation in a cafeteria to pick up nothing but a lot of desserts or starches or salads or some other food we particularly like. It serves as an important reminder to us to keep a balance in our lives. 2 LIVING SOBER In recovering from alcoholism, we found that we needed a balanced diet of ideas, even if some of them did not look, at first, as enjoyable as others. Like good food, good ideas did us no good unless we made intelligent use of them. And that leads to our second caution.
Living Sober
Page 2 continued
The point is, there is no prescribed A.A. “right” way or “wrong” way. Each of us uses what is best for himself or herself—without closing the door on other kinds of help we may find valuable at another time. And each of us tries to respect others’ rights to do things differently. Sometimes, an A.A. member will talk about taking the various parts of the program in cafeteria style—selecting what he likes and letting alone what he does not want. Maybe others will come along and pick up the unwanted parts—or maybe that member himself will go back later and take some of the ideas he previously rejected. However, it is good to remember the temptation in a cafeteria to pick up nothing but a lot of desserts or starches or salads or some other food we particularly like. It serves as an important reminder to us to keep a balance in our lives. 2 LIVING SOBER In recovering from alcoholism, we found that we needed a balanced diet of ideas, even if some of them did not look, at first, as enjoyable as others. Like good food, good ideas did us no good unless we made intelligent use of them. And that leads to our second caution.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 1,068
Tomorrow morning (Wednesday 11/22/23) at 6 am east coast USA time my AA home group will be reading and discussing chapter 3 "Using the 24-hour plan" of Living Sober. All who have a desire to stop drinking are welcome. We are a traditional meeting but there are a number of agnostics who attend regularly. We don't take ourselves too seriously. Zoom link can be found on the website below.
www.commonperil.com
www.commonperil.com
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Living Sober
Page 3 continued
B. Use your common sense. We found that we have to use plain everyday intelligence in applying the suggestions that follow. Like almost any other ideas, the suggestions in this booklet can be misused. For example, take the notion of eating candy. Obviously, alcoholics with diabetes, obesity, or blood-sugar problems have had to find substitutes, so they would not endanger their health, yet could still get the benefit of the candy-eating idea in recovery from alcoholism. (Many nutritionists favor protein-rich snacks over sweets as a general practice.) Also, it’s not good for anybody to overdo this remedy. We should eat balanced meals in addition to the candy. Another example is the use of the slogan “Easy Does It.” Some of us have found that we could abuse this sensible notion, turning it into an excuse for tardiness, laziness, or rudeness. That is not, of course, what the slogan is intended for. Properly applied, it can be healing; misapplied, it can hinder our recovery. Some among us would add to it: “‘Easy Does It’—but do it!”
Living Sober
Page 3 continued
B. Use your common sense. We found that we have to use plain everyday intelligence in applying the suggestions that follow. Like almost any other ideas, the suggestions in this booklet can be misused. For example, take the notion of eating candy. Obviously, alcoholics with diabetes, obesity, or blood-sugar problems have had to find substitutes, so they would not endanger their health, yet could still get the benefit of the candy-eating idea in recovery from alcoholism. (Many nutritionists favor protein-rich snacks over sweets as a general practice.) Also, it’s not good for anybody to overdo this remedy. We should eat balanced meals in addition to the candy. Another example is the use of the slogan “Easy Does It.” Some of us have found that we could abuse this sensible notion, turning it into an excuse for tardiness, laziness, or rudeness. That is not, of course, what the slogan is intended for. Properly applied, it can be healing; misapplied, it can hinder our recovery. Some among us would add to it: “‘Easy Does It’—but do it!”
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Living Sober
Page 3
B. Use your common sense. We found that we have to use plain everyday intelligence in applying the suggestions that follow. Like almost any other ideas, the suggestions in this booklet can be misused. For example, take the notion of eating candy. Obviously, alcoholics with diabetes, obesity, or blood-sugar problems have had to find substitutes, so they would not endanger their health, yet could still get the benefit of the candy-eating idea in recovery from alcoholism. (Many nutritionists favor protein-rich snacks over sweets as a general practice.) Also, it’s not good for anybody to overdo this remedy. We should eat balanced meals in addition to the candy. Another example is the use of the slogan “Easy Does It.” Some of us have found that we could abuse this sensible notion, turning it into an excuse for tardiness, laziness, or rudeness. That is not, of course, what the slogan is intended for. Properly applied, it can be healing; misapplied, it can hinder our recovery. Some among us would add to it: “‘Easy Does It’—but do it!” It’s clear that we have to use our intelligence in following any advice. Every method described here needs to be used with good judgment.
Living Sober
Page 3
B. Use your common sense. We found that we have to use plain everyday intelligence in applying the suggestions that follow. Like almost any other ideas, the suggestions in this booklet can be misused. For example, take the notion of eating candy. Obviously, alcoholics with diabetes, obesity, or blood-sugar problems have had to find substitutes, so they would not endanger their health, yet could still get the benefit of the candy-eating idea in recovery from alcoholism. (Many nutritionists favor protein-rich snacks over sweets as a general practice.) Also, it’s not good for anybody to overdo this remedy. We should eat balanced meals in addition to the candy. Another example is the use of the slogan “Easy Does It.” Some of us have found that we could abuse this sensible notion, turning it into an excuse for tardiness, laziness, or rudeness. That is not, of course, what the slogan is intended for. Properly applied, it can be healing; misapplied, it can hinder our recovery. Some among us would add to it: “‘Easy Does It’—but do it!” It’s clear that we have to use our intelligence in following any advice. Every method described here needs to be used with good judgment.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2019
Posts: 1,599
Linked with the permission of Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc
Living Sober
Page 3 continued
One more thing. A.A. does not pretend to offer scientific expertise on staying sober. We can share with you only our own personal experience, not professional theories and explanations.
So these pages offer no new medical shortcuts on how to stop drinking if you are still doing it, nor any miraculous secrets for shortening or avoiding a hangover.
Sometimes, getting sober can be done on your own at home; but frequently, prolonged drinking has caused such serious medical problems that you would be better advised to seek medical or hospital help for drying out. If you are that seriously ill, you may need such professional services before you can possibly be interested in what we offer here.
Living Sober
Page 3 continued
One more thing. A.A. does not pretend to offer scientific expertise on staying sober. We can share with you only our own personal experience, not professional theories and explanations.
So these pages offer no new medical shortcuts on how to stop drinking if you are still doing it, nor any miraculous secrets for shortening or avoiding a hangover.
Sometimes, getting sober can be done on your own at home; but frequently, prolonged drinking has caused such serious medical problems that you would be better advised to seek medical or hospital help for drying out. If you are that seriously ill, you may need such professional services before you can possibly be interested in what we offer here.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
