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Old 11-23-2009, 11:28 AM
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Day 14 and all is well… better than well… for those of you who have been following me for the past two weeks… well… I hate to kiss and tell… but well… my wife and I had a little make-out time last night. Initiated by her I think. All I know is that I wasn’t intending to initiate anything due my transgressions. It was pretty amazing… I felt like a teenage again… you know… back when I was actually sober? I can’t remember that last time I have been that close to my wife without some form of alcohol running through my bloodstream. It was really nice. We hadn’t been that close in almost a year. We’re committed to working through this and that makes me so happy. If being sober means I get to make-out with my wife… then sign me up!
On another note… I finally felt the twinge of wanting to drink tonight. My boss has been jerking me around about my paternity leave and it’s driving me nuts. I’ve asked for eight more days of leave (since my wife is being sent to London to have the baby. Right now, there will be a three week gap from the time my wife and son arrive in London and when I am approved to go join them. The eight days I am asking for would shrink that gap down to one week apart…. AND allow all of us to be together for Christmas and New Years Eve (which is my birthday)… and for some reason my boss is been a total pain about the time additional time off. I just don’t understand it… the law is actually on my side… and I’ve shown her the law… but she still argues it with me… it’s all ridiculous. Anyway, when she denied the eight days originally she sighted a reason… well, that reason just cancelled and will no longer be coming during that time… so the reason doesn’t exist anymore. When I approached the subject of the eight days again today she gave me some other excuses and said she would need a weeks to think about it. I mean COME ON! Ridiculous! The whole thing makes me angry. The whole thing makes me want to drink… good thing I made-out with my wife last night… or else I probably wouldn’t have seen the benefits of what I am doing right now… not drinking.
And you know what? My wife is the most loving and supportive hottie I have ever met… and that little hottie totally outweighs the bottle.
Here’s to Day 14 everyone! Have a great night!
Akazia: Yeah, it’s all nasty business. We’re here for you when you need to vent!
Gndrdo: Welcome!
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Old 11-23-2009, 12:57 PM
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I feel a bit in a funk.....woke up crabby today for no apparent reason........then I got to thinking about it.......the impending holidays.......never an easy time for me and this year the new dude.....his 2 daughters will be coming over.......22 and 18. Yikes! But my buddy will be here too, that will take some load off. I have spent more money on food than the dude has and that pisses me off. Is he really that dense? I am starting to stress about money and he picked up on it today. He said he would get more to me......why should I even have to ask!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :wtf2
Sorry.........just needed to let all this out.

Nice to have some new people coming in.......this will be good support thru the holiday season.......I know I need it.
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Old 11-23-2009, 03:14 PM
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Originally Posted by ViciousCycle View Post
I feel a bit in a funk.....woke up crabby today for no apparent reason........then I got to thinking about it.......the impending holidays...
It may not be the holidays altogether. I was in a funk the end of last week thru pretty much all day yesterday. Woke up in a better mood today, probably partly cuz the sun was shining, but maybe also cuz the funk just passed. Don't know. Do know I feel less cranky and more optimistic today.

Tytan-- So happy that things at home are going so well! RE: your work situation, I hope you are documenting all your discussions with your boss for future reference if this ever gets to the HR Dept. (or farther). It's important to have it "just in case." Also congrats on 14 days. Well done!
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Old 11-23-2009, 03:21 PM
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Sorry to hear about your funkified Monday, VC. Yeah..holidays are really hard for a lot of people..and money issues..ugh! You've got a double whammy going there right now! Hang in there! My weekend is gonna be a tempt fest...going up north with my brother, who I always drink with.

Tytan..good to hear things are going well!
Clos...great job on day 4!
Nov15...congrats on your first weekend! Nice to wake up feelin good, eh?

Hope all of you are happy tonight!
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Old 11-23-2009, 06:16 PM
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Nov15-I am right there with you-day 9 for me-and I had cut back to weekend drinking only also so I know how you feel-one weekend at a time! Starting to feel much better-flu going and energy coming back. Skin looking better already too which is a bonus for sure-I have been popping vitamins so that may have a little to do with it but whatever works!
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Old 11-24-2009, 11:12 AM
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Day 15 and things are going just fine.
Thanks for the advice Asta… but everything turned out okay. After two months of fighting over a reasonable amount of paternity leave… especially for a guy who volunteered to spend a year in a war zone next year… I finally received the approval for the 8 days I wanted. It took an act of congress to get it… no seriously… my entire chain of command had a meeting about my leave request today. Yes, your tax dollars at work. In the end they granted me the 8 days but let me know that it was very inconvenient for the good of the whole… and that they were really going above and beyond for me since they are letting me have more than the normal amount of leave given to fathers. (Which is 100% false… I know it’s false… I asked for the same amount of time that two other guys were granted without issue last year… and a third guy actually took the full 3 months as provided by the Family Medical Leave Act). Anyway, I simply thanked them for their decision and let them know that “don’t worry, I’ve already instructed my wife, if she conceives again, to make sure the due date is in a more convenient time of year, not overlapping with the holidays.” I’m such a *******. Anyway… I am very happy about it… my wife is very happy about it… she’ll only be on her own for a month… and we get to spend Christmas together! Hurray!
Now I want a drink to celebrate! Wait… no… forget I said that.
VC: Sorry to hear the holidays are starting to get you down. Is this going to be first time you meet the kids? And based on their age and I can totally understand the stress. And hey! Just give him your grocery receipts. Lol.
Akazia: glad to hear you are starting to feel better!
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Old 11-24-2009, 11:37 AM
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Morning all (it still is morning here PST).
Tytan, congrats on your leave and day 15. Love your sense of humor!

Another morning waking up with sunshine. Amazing! There's not much wind out there either and it is getting to be low tide so I am going to go for a beach walk.

Have a good day all!
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Old 11-24-2009, 12:27 PM
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Oh man, Asta. Sun AND beach? You're killin me. (Though we've had an awesome fall this year.) Enjoy the walk! Say 'hey' to a seagull for me....
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Old 11-24-2009, 01:46 PM
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Originally Posted by mirage View Post
Oh man, Asta. Sun AND beach? You're killin me. (Though we've had an awesome fall this year.) Enjoy the walk! Say 'hey' to a seagull for me....
Hey! Don't begrudge me a beautiful day! Most of November here on the coast has been rain, rain, showers, wind, and more rain. This is actually the 1st time this month I've been out on the beach, and it really was beautiful.

Lots of seagulls and sandpipers out there. There is a spot where a stream flows into the ocean (brackish water) and a lot of seagulls hang out there. They're so fun to watch. They fly a little ways inland from the ocean, and plop down on the current as it heads toward the ocean. They just coast along, sometimes flapping their wings and dunking (I think this is a cleaning thing), then when they get close to the ocean, they up and fly back to where they started and do the whole thing over. It's quite amusing.
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Old 11-24-2009, 05:58 PM
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Hmmm the ocean-that's funny, I was standing lookin in our tropical fish tank at work with some of the children and I realised how much I MISS just the smell and sound of the ocean and I had a strong craving to be sitting on the beach today...ahh well glad someone else can if not me! I have a change jar which is filling up especially now I am not dipping into it for alcohol money so hopefully next year it is vacation time for me and the little one...day 10 down for me
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Old 11-24-2009, 06:21 PM
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Hey guys, I just came to this forum. It sounds like a great idea. I've been sober for 3 days. I saw the November group, and I guess this is where I belong . Looking forward to a nice long thanksgiving week away from my college. I don't have many friends to spend time with at home and my girlfriend's a 100 miles away for thanksgiving so I'm feeling kind of alone. Good thing I stumbled upon this place.
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Old 11-24-2009, 07:02 PM
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Welcome lmnt! Congrats on 3 days! Glad you're here.. post often and let us know how you're doing!

Asta..ok, fine. You can have your lovely day at the beach!

Way to go Akazia! Day 10 for me, too. Have a challenging weekend ahead..trying not to think about it too much.
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Old 11-24-2009, 07:12 PM
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Originally Posted by lmnt1080 View Post
Hey guys, I just came to this forum. It sounds like a great idea. I've been sober for 3 days. I saw the November group, and I guess this is where I belong . Looking forward to a nice long thanksgiving week away from my college. I don't have many friends to spend time with at home and my girlfriend's a 100 miles away for thanksgiving so I'm feeling kind of alone. Good thing I stumbled upon this place.
The November group is great! Browse thru the other forums and join in as many as you want. I often read the new posts and chime in often if I feel I have anything to add. Also in Newcomers is the Newcomers with Less than 2 Weeks. That's a good group too.

Congrats on day 3! It's a great start. You can spend as much time as you can bear (!!) over Thanksgiving. There is always somebody on line. Seems a lot of people have insomnia cuz I see a lot of posts from the wee hours.

Glad to have you herel.
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Old 11-24-2009, 11:20 PM
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Welcome to SR lmnt and the November thread

I had a nice day y'all... relaxing at first... only I'm basically quitting smoking by accident too now. No more money... oops. But my teacher gave me $20 for that... I was shaking in her office... she knows all about my bottle-related issues, one of a couple who've had similar bottle-related issues.

I gave a make up presentation today (was drunk in next county when I was supposed to give it) and it went great! They clapped for me twice (somebody said it was the best one, especially 'cause I was doing a group presentation on my own). So happy. So *relieved*.

I got some candy and some cigarettes... gonna try and wean myself off them, since this time I have no excuse. Truth is, I knew I was going to run out of money, I didn't remember that cigarettes and candy cost. Yes, I am normally somewhat intelligent... Just had a bunch of stuff on my mind lately. Like don't drink, and fix all the mess you done made. Ok, two things.

Keep going, November group, we can do this!
TB

ps... Tytan, yeah, you work in government. You have the prerequisite sarcasm. Congrats on the leave--and I'd rather my tax dollars go there... Course I haven't worked this calendar year, so for the first time since grown, I will not be filing taxes.
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Old 11-25-2009, 07:07 AM
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TB...way to go on that presentation! When they clapped did you say, "you like me! You really like me!"? har har...little Sally Field joke there. Glad it went so well for you and good to hear you're doing well. Yes, smokes are freakin expensive. That quit is down low on my to do list at the moment. I hope it goes well for ya.
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Old 11-25-2009, 11:13 AM
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Day 16 and I’m still here… and so is everyone else.
I got a meltdown email from my wife today… understandable, all things considered. She wanted to know when the last time I had contact with the other woman in question and if I had feelings for her… if I told her I loved her… or had her in the wings in case things don’t work out with fixing us. She was worried if I relapse would I seek her out. I’m sure it was a very hard email for her to write… but an easy one for me to respond too. I can’t promise that we’ll never get into a fight again… I can’t promise that I will never get drunk again (although I am working really hard at it), but I can promise to love her. There is only one woman for me, that is my wife… and I am fixing myself. I let the bottle lead me across a line I wouldn’t have normally crossed. It’s hard… but I know where this email was coming from. My wife just wants to know if she stays and works on forgiving me that it won’t be all in vain. I understand that.
Anyway… I’ve said it before… as horrible as my past actions I woke me up. I am sober and I am seeing the world is such a new light.
Well, I am grab that some of you have been enjoying my humor… you never know if it will translate into the written word. Over the past 16 days I have found my wit become faster. Once upon a time I was an improvisational comedian… like on “Who’s Line…” Semi-professions region theatre type improv theatre. Back then I had a strict no drinking before a show policy. I would drink afterwards. And if I can be conceded for a moment I was pretty good on stage and had a meager following. But, when I became a dad I didn’t want to be out of the house as much… so I gave up performing… and I guess that’s when the drinking started… I guess I was bored. I don’t know… anyway… I don’t think I’ve been very funny over the past few years… and I feel my “quick on my feet” humor coming back… and I like it.
Huh… there’s something about this sober thing.
Imnt: Take Asta’s advice… feel free to jump in anytime and catching up on past posts would probably be a good idea too. Welcome!
Thirsty: Nice job on the presentation. Ifs funny who you will find who understand what you’re going through. As for the tax issue, this year is on the house.
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Old 11-25-2009, 02:54 PM
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Just popping in to wish everyone a nice T-day!! Stay strong!! It's just another day with more food involved!!!!!!!!

See ya on the flip side!!
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Old 11-25-2009, 02:57 PM
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Yesterday's gone -- another day down sober for me!
Looking forward to the smells in the kitchen tomorrow. As often as not, I taste and nibble so much during the prep, by the time the food is actually ready, I'm not that hungry anymore. But I love leftovers. All kinds of creative stuff you can make with leftover turkey. We'll probably freeze part of it for a later date.

To everyone who is traveling, have a safe trip please! Later...........
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Old 11-25-2009, 05:53 PM
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I'm done. Sobriety is too hard. I just don't see the point anymore.

It's just not for everyone, I think.

So why am I still here?

I'm out.
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Old 11-25-2009, 05:58 PM
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I've never seen a hopeless case yet Eureka - unless you decide you are.
This is a whole new way of life - it's not easy.

Learn from whatever happened, then regroup - work out where you need shoring up, add a few more things to your sobriety arsenal maybe....

if you want to, you can do this
D
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