Class of March 2017 Support Thread Part Two
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: LI, NY
Posts: 982
I was briefly listening to some sobriety talk on YouTube last night and it was mentioned that the anticipation of drinking is often better than when you actually do it. I could totally relate to that, especially if I had a day or two of not drinking - I was ready to go. Then it could be a Saturday at 2 PM, I'm half in the bag and I think now what? I can't go drive somewhere and actually live life. I am more convinced than ever that sobriety rules and that I don't need alcohol in my life.
If you're starting over, keep trying until you succeed. I'm trying to work each day on doing the right things and being a better person. Day ten for me.
If you're starting over, keep trying until you succeed. I'm trying to work each day on doing the right things and being a better person. Day ten for me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Olde England
Posts: 528
Originally Posted by JCNY 
Then it could be a Saturday at 2 PM, I'm half in the bag and I think now what? I can't go drive somewhere and actually live life. I am more convinced than ever that sobriety rules and that I don't need alcohol in my life.
Tiredness aside, this week I've done so much, not patting myself on the back too hard though as this is all stuff that should have been tackled months ago lol, still, back to square 1 and there shouldn't be any landmines waiting to derail my recovery - and if there are I'm heading to a meeting.
Some comments on this thread about feeling alone and not having anyone to turn to when AV starts whispering in your ear - AA if full of people who've been exactly where we are and nothing makes an AA member happier than helping someone else beat the addiction. I appreciate it's not for everyone and there are other sources of support out there but for me, had I a sponsor and been working the (any) program back in April '15, I'm sure I wouldn't have done a triple backflip off the 20m highdive board and straight back into the drink - could have done so much in the last two years - not wasting the next two.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: CT, USA
Posts: 83
Originally Posted by JCNY
the anticipation of drinking is often better than when you actually do it.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 152
Ending day 16. I'm back from my weekend trip and very proud I didn't drink! My anxiety is subsiding and I feel a lot calmer. I'm still really tired but hopefully this will get better this week.
Rmeatgt350 - sorry about the credit card problem. Just last week someone tried to buy a $2500 cold coin on our EBay account! Thank goodness it was flagged as suspicious right away.
Immri, my anxiety is finally decreasing after 2 weeks-- hang in there.
SandyO, good luck on your new job!
Mizzuno, I'm trying to cut down sugar. I think it's contributing to some stomach issues I'm having.
Lava, congrats on the sober weekend-- me too!
Tronics, Lovehoops and Nia, get right back at it! We're here to support you.
Welcome LucyJane!
Casey, feel better! Do you have any idea what's going on? Are you happy in your job? Are you eating healthy food?
MCM, I need a new hobby too. And start exercising again.
Hello to those I missed. Don't take that first drink, come here first!! I'm off to make a ginger lemon tea.
Rmeatgt350 - sorry about the credit card problem. Just last week someone tried to buy a $2500 cold coin on our EBay account! Thank goodness it was flagged as suspicious right away.
Immri, my anxiety is finally decreasing after 2 weeks-- hang in there.
SandyO, good luck on your new job!
Mizzuno, I'm trying to cut down sugar. I think it's contributing to some stomach issues I'm having.
Lava, congrats on the sober weekend-- me too!
Tronics, Lovehoops and Nia, get right back at it! We're here to support you.
Welcome LucyJane!
Casey, feel better! Do you have any idea what's going on? Are you happy in your job? Are you eating healthy food?
MCM, I need a new hobby too. And start exercising again.
Hello to those I missed. Don't take that first drink, come here first!! I'm off to make a ginger lemon tea.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 3,597
Originally Posted by JCNY
I was briefly listening to some sobriety talk on YouTube last night and it was mentioned that the anticipation of drinking is often better than when you actually do it. I could totally relate to that, especially if I had a day or two of not drinking - I was ready to go. Then it could be a Saturday at 2 PM, I'm half in the bag and I think now what? I can't go drive somewhere and actually live life. I am more convinced than ever that sobriety rules and that I don't need alcohol in my life.
If you're starting over, keep trying until you succeed. I'm trying to work each day on doing the right things and being a better person. Day ten for me.
If you're starting over, keep trying until you succeed. I'm trying to work each day on doing the right things and being a better person. Day ten for me.
I love this!!! Great post, JCNY!!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: Northeast, USA
Posts: 275
Yeah, thanks for asking. I made the mistake of thinking I could have alcohol in the house. We had gin left over from when this guy came to visit about a week ago. I didn't drink it then (thanks to posting on SR at the time) and I foolishly thought I could have it in the house (probably AV talking).
Then last night my chronic pain issues (trigeminal neuralgia so constant jaw/neck/shoulder pain) just got to be too much and I hit the proverbial bottle. It was due to the pain (and no meds to help it) that my drinking skyrocketed in the past few months--I was already headed down that road, but this sped the journey). I now have some meds, but I have wanted to quit drinking for many, many years and this seemed like the right time.
So, takeaway is: no alcohol in the house and get back into learning how to meditate to help with the pain.
Then last night my chronic pain issues (trigeminal neuralgia so constant jaw/neck/shoulder pain) just got to be too much and I hit the proverbial bottle. It was due to the pain (and no meds to help it) that my drinking skyrocketed in the past few months--I was already headed down that road, but this sped the journey). I now have some meds, but I have wanted to quit drinking for many, many years and this seemed like the right time.
So, takeaway is: no alcohol in the house and get back into learning how to meditate to help with the pain.
Last edited by argillaceous; 03-27-2017 at 05:31 PM. Reason: sentence correction
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 152
I have chronic pain issues too in my lower spine, sacroiliac joint. And I can't take NSAIDs because of my stomach. So I know about self-medicating with alcohol. But I've come to realize that the wine was probably causing even more inflammation and pain. I finally found a procedure that kills the nerve causing the pain for about 6 months. Nerves regenerate so I have to get it done twice a year. What sort of options have you looked into? I'm glad you came back.
Member
Join Date: May 2015
Posts: 345
Good morning everyone.
Agri, onlylovetoday, lovehoops- sorry you drank over the weekend, but it seems you've recognized your triggers and can work on it next time. It's hard to get out of the cycle of being mad at ourselves but it only perpetuates the situation. Use it as a learning tool to help you through next time. We always have of the option of trying again.
Congratulations on 22 days better is better. Glad to here the tiredness is starting to subside.
16 days for you bebrave. You are living up to your name!
8 days for Mish and Maine. We have struggle through maybe another week or so of the tiredness. It's not an easy journey we've started but the rewards are waiting for us.
Nice to say that we are still on par, JCNY.
Apart from being tired, I need to be mindful of my emotions. I snapped at my husband last night when he got annoyed with me instead of explaining things. I'm not a confrontational person and have spent years letting things slide helped greatly by alcohol. Things never seemed so bad then. However, at times when I was really drunk I'd pick fights and let things out in the most ridiculous way. My true feelings were never properly conveyed and I'd end up just spilling out stupid and hurtful things which I never believed in the first place.
I know it's good to discuss things and even fight every now and then, but our relationship is not used to it. I need to be more mindful of how I approach things. I guess it's all part of the process, dealing with issues that would have been swept under the carpet. Just feeling bad that I made him feel bad.
I'm not thinking about drinking, instead I'm thinking about how I can improve. Big step forward!
I'm going to get some pampering in today and then have a business dinner.
Hope you all have great day 😊
Agri, onlylovetoday, lovehoops- sorry you drank over the weekend, but it seems you've recognized your triggers and can work on it next time. It's hard to get out of the cycle of being mad at ourselves but it only perpetuates the situation. Use it as a learning tool to help you through next time. We always have of the option of trying again.
Congratulations on 22 days better is better. Glad to here the tiredness is starting to subside.
16 days for you bebrave. You are living up to your name!
8 days for Mish and Maine. We have struggle through maybe another week or so of the tiredness. It's not an easy journey we've started but the rewards are waiting for us.
Nice to say that we are still on par, JCNY.
Apart from being tired, I need to be mindful of my emotions. I snapped at my husband last night when he got annoyed with me instead of explaining things. I'm not a confrontational person and have spent years letting things slide helped greatly by alcohol. Things never seemed so bad then. However, at times when I was really drunk I'd pick fights and let things out in the most ridiculous way. My true feelings were never properly conveyed and I'd end up just spilling out stupid and hurtful things which I never believed in the first place.
I know it's good to discuss things and even fight every now and then, but our relationship is not used to it. I need to be more mindful of how I approach things. I guess it's all part of the process, dealing with issues that would have been swept under the carpet. Just feeling bad that I made him feel bad.
I'm not thinking about drinking, instead I'm thinking about how I can improve. Big step forward!
I'm going to get some pampering in today and then have a business dinner.
Hope you all have great day 😊
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 3,597
Understandable, agri. I couldn't keep alcohol in the house or I'd drink it. I think early in recovery, you just can't take the chance because you always know in the back of your mind (the AV part) that its there, and when you're weak, or tired, or depressed, suddenly the idea pops into your mind to drink. It's not a weakness, it's just the way the addiction manifests itself early on. So long story short, you gotta dump that sh!t out.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Posts: 8
Hi all,
Sorry for being MIA! Day 14 for me. Felt awesome last week - sleeping better, tons of energy, super chipper and proud of myself - and sort of crashed this weekend. Just feeling a bit lonely and isolated. My friends are all being very supportive but they all drink, and we live in a big boozy city. Every social event - brunch, dinner, work events, concerts ,watching TV, going to the park, art openings - somehow involves drinking and I feel hyperaware that I'm the only one not drinking. Endured a long dinner on Friday night with a guy I'm seeing (very proud of me for quitting, but a big drinker) and his coworkers all downing sake, tired and bored out of my mind while they got drunk. Didn't drink, though!
I'm a little wary of AA as I'm not crazy about the God stuff, but am thinking of dropping in just to feel less alone in this!
Sorry for being MIA! Day 14 for me. Felt awesome last week - sleeping better, tons of energy, super chipper and proud of myself - and sort of crashed this weekend. Just feeling a bit lonely and isolated. My friends are all being very supportive but they all drink, and we live in a big boozy city. Every social event - brunch, dinner, work events, concerts ,watching TV, going to the park, art openings - somehow involves drinking and I feel hyperaware that I'm the only one not drinking. Endured a long dinner on Friday night with a guy I'm seeing (very proud of me for quitting, but a big drinker) and his coworkers all downing sake, tired and bored out of my mind while they got drunk. Didn't drink, though!
I'm a little wary of AA as I'm not crazy about the God stuff, but am thinking of dropping in just to feel less alone in this!
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