I was briefly listening to some sobriety talk on YouTube last night and it was mentioned that the anticipation of drinking is often better than when you actually do it. I could totally relate to that, especially if I had a day or two of not drinking - I was ready to go. Then it could be a Saturday at 2 PM, I'm half in the bag and I think now what? I can't go drive somewhere and actually live life. I am more convinced than ever that sobriety rules and that I don't need alcohol in my life.
If you're starting over, keep trying until you succeed. I'm trying to work each day on doing the right things and being a better person. Day ten for me.