Originally Posted by
JCNY 
Then it could be a Saturday at 2 PM, I'm half in the bag and I think now what? I can't go drive somewhere and actually live life. I am more convinced than ever that sobriety rules and that I don't need alcohol in my life.
Sounds very familiar indeed, my ex used not to get out of bed on weekends till at least half 10 / 11, I've always been an early riser and that gave me a whole half day to myself to get stuck into whatever I had stashed in the garage - like you say though come early afternoon you're fit for nothing.
Tiredness aside, this week I've done so much, not patting myself on the back too hard though as this is all stuff that should have been tackled months ago lol, still, back to square 1 and there shouldn't be any landmines waiting to derail my recovery - and if there are I'm heading to a meeting.
Some comments on this thread about feeling alone and not having anyone to turn to when AV starts whispering in your ear - AA if full of people who've been exactly where we are and nothing makes an AA member happier than helping someone else beat the addiction. I appreciate it's not for everyone and there are other sources of support out there but for me, had I a sponsor and been working the (any) program back in April '15, I'm sure I wouldn't have done a triple backflip off the 20m highdive board and straight back into the drink - could have done so much in the last two years - not wasting the next two.