Class Of January 2016 Support Thread part 2
Alive in the Superunknown
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47ºN, 98.15ºW
Posts: 1,460
I love waking up clear-headed.
I didn't get the housework I wanted done, done yesterday, so that's on the agenda for today, along with laundry -- yay me.
I'll be Skyping with Harmz tonight, so I'll get another dose of limbo from her. I'm by nature a hopeful person. I've been very busy crushing these hopes as they crop up; she has made it clear I have no business hoping that our romantic love can be rescued. I'm glad to have her friendship, she's a great person, but I can't help wanting more sometimes.
Anyway, I'll have to take some more hopes out to the backyard tonight, and shoot them, too.
If it's a sober and a break-even day today, I'm good.
Hope y'all have a good'un.
Our rationales are so often simply barbed hooks we cast for ourselves.
*****
Hiya Aly, and welcome.
I didn't get the housework I wanted done, done yesterday, so that's on the agenda for today, along with laundry -- yay me.
I'll be Skyping with Harmz tonight, so I'll get another dose of limbo from her. I'm by nature a hopeful person. I've been very busy crushing these hopes as they crop up; she has made it clear I have no business hoping that our romantic love can be rescued. I'm glad to have her friendship, she's a great person, but I can't help wanting more sometimes.
Anyway, I'll have to take some more hopes out to the backyard tonight, and shoot them, too.
If it's a sober and a break-even day today, I'm good.
Hope y'all have a good'un.
Originally Posted by Dee74 
Our AV loves it when there's an underlying issue we can't readily fix and we 'have' to drink over....
*****
Hiya Aly, and welcome.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 97
Thank you Odelle
Stronger... Not really.
It took me along time to get to this place. I have learned so much from SR. When I finally started posting, I feel like I got the support I needed. Working in a bar was my excuse for a long time. I'm done with excuses! I still have a long way to go. It's the journey not the destination.
Stronger... Not really.
It took me along time to get to this place. I have learned so much from SR. When I finally started posting, I feel like I got the support I needed. Working in a bar was my excuse for a long time. I'm done with excuses! I still have a long way to go. It's the journey not the destination.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by Olivia2011
Sunflower - can you expand on your sessions? I'm liking my hypnosis tape. I saw a hypnotist many years ago. I didn't listen to the tape at night tho. I'm older now and finding this very relaxing. I don't think the man I saw was very good tho. Same with a female therapist I went to. I think you mentioned a site to go to (or maybe it was Gib) where you can see the doctor, etc. What impresses you about this hypnotist ? How do you feel after a session?
It's funny because I was looking up hypnostist for the last month and honestly picked this guy because he was the closest one to me. I didn't realize that he was a "Stress Management Hypnotist" or that we would be talking for an hour before the hypnosis. So basically I ended up with a therapist and hypnotist in 1. He is genuinely caring and sympathetic, really easy to talk to and has a great sense of humor. My favorite thing about him is that he builds me up by telling me my strong points and because of the way he asks questions, I end up finding my own solutions to my problems rather than him coming up with them. It's very empowering.
It's not what I was expecting as far as hypnosis though. I have also done mp3s in the past and there is always the countdown, then the focus of what you are trying to change, and the count back up. He doesn't do countdowns and never talks about drinking. Instead he points out how relaxed I am and reinforces that I am resourceful, with all the knowledge I need within myself.
I am always so relaxed that I end up not wanting to get out of the recliner at the end! I yawn a lot afterwards too.
I really lucked out this time. I have seen countless therapists in my life and nothing compares to this guy. I do think hypnosis for drinking can be very effective and I know you can buy them online. Is the one you use for alcohol abuse? My personal favorite (online) Hypnotist is Erick Brown.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by Seep9871
Celebrating day 10 by going out to dinner and a comedy club with drinkers..I can't skip it. I sure hope I check in tomorrow morning with another sober day under my belt.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,776
Day 16.
I'm battling an old demon. Drinking to fit in, have fun just like everyone else.
My weak situation is when I want to meet up with one person at a time.
One is a stranger that it is so easy to a have a couple with and feel normal. I may not go on a bender that night but it will bring me a step closer to feeling all the suffering and pain and negative pressure drinking brings. Then I spin out for a week or so drinking then come back to sober.
All because of wanting to please and have one drink with a stranger.
The other situation is with an old drinking buddy.
She can drink or not drink, but when she does its all on and we have a lot of memories together. When I know I'm going out with her I become restless, petulant, want it all, want it now type feelings....
I'm working through them. I'm working my plan like a demon. I'm trying to figure out what's really going on?
I'm fine the way I am and I don't need booze as a social crutch. I want to get far away from the highs and lows of drinking. I just want to live in peace that I know sober brings.
Good wishes to all here.
I'm battling an old demon. Drinking to fit in, have fun just like everyone else.
My weak situation is when I want to meet up with one person at a time.
One is a stranger that it is so easy to a have a couple with and feel normal. I may not go on a bender that night but it will bring me a step closer to feeling all the suffering and pain and negative pressure drinking brings. Then I spin out for a week or so drinking then come back to sober.
All because of wanting to please and have one drink with a stranger.
The other situation is with an old drinking buddy.
She can drink or not drink, but when she does its all on and we have a lot of memories together. When I know I'm going out with her I become restless, petulant, want it all, want it now type feelings....
I'm working through them. I'm working my plan like a demon. I'm trying to figure out what's really going on?
I'm fine the way I am and I don't need booze as a social crutch. I want to get far away from the highs and lows of drinking. I just want to live in peace that I know sober brings.
Good wishes to all here.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by SillyHuman
Morning all.
I am looking at counselors (thanks for the tip Sunflower). My sister has a master's in psychology, and she is one of the craziest, most destructive people I know. My stomach hurts from just looking at the ads. I am so flipping sick of the routine:
Work up hope that counseling will help.
Work up the courage to go.
Make appointment and wait.
Pay the flipping money.
And, nothing worthwhile happens.
At my one and only inpatient stay a year and a half ago, they messed up so bad that they were not allowed to charge me for the stay. Yep, $20,000+ I did not have to pay, and I got my money's worth!
I suspect therapy is just a money-making scam anyway.
I really, really do NOT want to do this.
Can anyone testify that they went to therapy and it was actually worth it?
I am looking at counselors (thanks for the tip Sunflower). My sister has a master's in psychology, and she is one of the craziest, most destructive people I know. My stomach hurts from just looking at the ads. I am so flipping sick of the routine:
Work up hope that counseling will help.
Work up the courage to go.
Make appointment and wait.
Pay the flipping money.
And, nothing worthwhile happens.
At my one and only inpatient stay a year and a half ago, they messed up so bad that they were not allowed to charge me for the stay. Yep, $20,000+ I did not have to pay, and I got my money's worth!
I suspect therapy is just a money-making scam anyway.
I really, really do NOT want to do this.
Can anyone testify that they went to therapy and it was actually worth it?
What is it about therapy that you don't like? Is it just the fact that you have never found one you like or do you have a problem with opening up?
If you don't like dwelling in the past, look for a therapist who practices "Positive Psychology." Instead of rehashing the past they focus on how to change for a better future and how to achieve happiness. My last therapist practiced this and I enjoyed it (although honestly I like to get to the root of issues as well).
I found him on the site I mentioned, through Psychology Today.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by Trees39
Day 16.
I'm battling an old demon. Drinking to fit in, have fun just like everyone else.
My weak situation is when I want to meet up with one person at a time.
One is a stranger that it is so easy to a have a couple with and feel normal. I may not go on a bender that night but it will bring me a step closer to feeling all the suffering and pain and negative pressure drinking brings. Then I spin out for a week or so drinking then come back to sober.
All because of wanting to please and have one drink with a stranger.
The other situation is with an old drinking buddy.
She can drink or not drink, but when she does its all on and we have a lot of memories together. When I know I'm going out with her I become restless, petulant, want it all, want it now type feelings....
I'm working through them. I'm working my plan like a demon. I'm trying to figure out what's really going on?
I'm fine the way I am and I don't need booze as a social crutch. I want to get far away from the highs and lows of drinking. I just want to live in peace that I know sober brings.
Good wishes to all here.
I'm battling an old demon. Drinking to fit in, have fun just like everyone else.
My weak situation is when I want to meet up with one person at a time.
One is a stranger that it is so easy to a have a couple with and feel normal. I may not go on a bender that night but it will bring me a step closer to feeling all the suffering and pain and negative pressure drinking brings. Then I spin out for a week or so drinking then come back to sober.
All because of wanting to please and have one drink with a stranger.
The other situation is with an old drinking buddy.
She can drink or not drink, but when she does its all on and we have a lot of memories together. When I know I'm going out with her I become restless, petulant, want it all, want it now type feelings....
I'm working through them. I'm working my plan like a demon. I'm trying to figure out what's really going on?
I'm fine the way I am and I don't need booze as a social crutch. I want to get far away from the highs and lows of drinking. I just want to live in peace that I know sober brings.
Good wishes to all here.
Would you be willing to give up your drinking buddy for good? Is this a person you can hang with in a sober scene instead?
What about the stranger- if you aren't close, why do you feel the need to sabotage your sobriety for this person?
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by illi1111
Hi Everyone
Day 20!
Last nite was an eye opener. I almost took a drink on autopilot. I was at work (bartender) and Lil John was screaming at me to do shots and I was discussing craft beers with the other bartender and he said try this one and put out the beer he was drinking. My hand was half way to it when I snapped out of it and said no thank you.
I wasn't thinking about getting drunk. I wasn't really thing at all just reacting. But my mind played the tape through for me in a split second. Some amazing change is happening in my thinking process!
Now to work harder on changing my profession so I don't need to put my self in situations like these.
I've worked to hard to let a sip ruin it.
Keep fighting everyone!
Day 20!
Last nite was an eye opener. I almost took a drink on autopilot. I was at work (bartender) and Lil John was screaming at me to do shots and I was discussing craft beers with the other bartender and he said try this one and put out the beer he was drinking. My hand was half way to it when I snapped out of it and said no thank you.
I wasn't thinking about getting drunk. I wasn't really thing at all just reacting. But my mind played the tape through for me in a split second. Some amazing change is happening in my thinking process!
Now to work harder on changing my profession so I don't need to put my self in situations like these.
I've worked to hard to let a sip ruin it.
Keep fighting everyone!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by benice
So I made it through last night with flying colors. Went to an open bar event. Had my mind set right. Asked the bartender for a club soda with lime and she said, "Want a splash of cranberry?" What an awesome bar tender!!!
Alive in the Superunknown
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47ºN, 98.15ºW
Posts: 1,460
Originally Posted by Seep9871
Celebrating day 10 by going out to dinner and a comedy club with drinkers..I can't skip it. I sure hope I check in tomorrow morning with another sober day under my belt.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by RallyAly
So far some agitation, a few headaches, and some rises in my HR And BP (which are both low baseline so not terribly concerning). I'm encouraged that I feel the same way as I did for my smoking quit: not filled with nervous resolve, rather feeling, simply, done with it.
I love that you say you are "simply done with it." That's exactly how I feel. Drinking is just not fun anymore and when you get to that point there is really no reason to continue, right?
Hope you are having a great sober day 2...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Hampshire UK
Posts: 162
Thank You
Originally Posted by DeepBlue
Hi all - great to see so many of you doing well. Sadly, since joining the January group a few days ago I haven't even been able to start Day 1. Somehow I just can't find the energy to take it on - it all feels like such a huge effort, whilst to carry on drinking is so easy (In the short term). But hopefully my mind is moving in the right direction and I will be able to commit sooner rather than later.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,221
Originally Posted by loopylou69
Day 14 here. Worst. Day. Ever. Almost cracked, the urge to drink was so strong. I kept thinking of you guys and how hard we are all struggling and that has kept me sober.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 97
Thank you Sunflowerlife
Working the bar sober was hard the first couple weeks was very hard. But now most of the regulars know I'm not drinking so don't even ask anymore. It is a lot easier to say no now. I find I after I tell them I'm just taking a break they are fine with that. I don't owe them any more explanation.
I guess the shift in perception is my own. Drunks at a bar are always gonna drink, but I don't need to be one of them. Also no one but me can decide if I drink or not. Sounds so simple right? Only took me what seems like forever to get it.
As for a new job... I have a degree in waste water treatment that I have never used. I have started studying to get certified. Then I will go from there. Being sober has made me realize I have been stuck in a lot of places in my life and it's time to move on and do better for myself and my son.
Working the bar sober was hard the first couple weeks was very hard. But now most of the regulars know I'm not drinking so don't even ask anymore. It is a lot easier to say no now. I find I after I tell them I'm just taking a break they are fine with that. I don't owe them any more explanation.
I guess the shift in perception is my own. Drunks at a bar are always gonna drink, but I don't need to be one of them. Also no one but me can decide if I drink or not. Sounds so simple right? Only took me what seems like forever to get it.
As for a new job... I have a degree in waste water treatment that I have never used. I have started studying to get certified. Then I will go from there. Being sober has made me realize I have been stuck in a lot of places in my life and it's time to move on and do better for myself and my son.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: toronto
Posts: 15
Advice on getting back a lost career
Hi all,
I am on day 13......doing ok. 7 years of university, bachelors in engineering and mba
And i am tearing down chimneys and any other general labour i am told to do.
Havent been able to build or keep a career job since my marriage ended more than 10 years ago....my 15 and 13 year old were poisoned against me by my ex and hardly speak to them....it has caused me to relapse and be in and out off aa for over 10 years
I finally try to do aa right by getting a sponsor and working the steps....but the guy has stood me up 3 times now .....instructing me to go to group early and he would meet me and we could start the work.....he didnt show up again last night....
Not gonna drink over it....but WTF
HOW DO I START TO REBUILD MY LIFE AND CAREER
ANY ADVICE APPRECIATED
I am on day 13......doing ok. 7 years of university, bachelors in engineering and mba
And i am tearing down chimneys and any other general labour i am told to do.
Havent been able to build or keep a career job since my marriage ended more than 10 years ago....my 15 and 13 year old were poisoned against me by my ex and hardly speak to them....it has caused me to relapse and be in and out off aa for over 10 years
I finally try to do aa right by getting a sponsor and working the steps....but the guy has stood me up 3 times now .....instructing me to go to group early and he would meet me and we could start the work.....he didnt show up again last night....
Not gonna drink over it....but WTF
HOW DO I START TO REBUILD MY LIFE AND CAREER
ANY ADVICE APPRECIATED
Alive in the Superunknown
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47ºN, 98.15ºW
Posts: 1,460
Originally Posted by patricia68
I'm glad to see familiar names here
I managed to stay sober for almost 6 weeks, survived the holidays...only to have an emotional meltdown on January 2nd, and I've been struggling ever since.
I managed to stay sober for almost 6 weeks, survived the holidays...only to have an emotional meltdown on January 2nd, and I've been struggling ever since.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
