Blogs


Notices

Class Of January 2016 Support Thread part 2

Old 01-15-2016, 07:52 AM
  # 221 (permalink)  
Member
 
SillyHuman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 324
Welcome Rally. Congats on Day 2. Nice to have you aboard.
SillyHuman is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to SillyHuman For This Useful Post:
ChickChick (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), tiredofme (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 09:26 AM
  # 222 (permalink)  
Alive in the Superunknown
 
Thumpalumpacus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47N, 98.15W
Posts: 1,460
I love waking up clear-headed.

I didn't get the housework I wanted done, done yesterday, so that's on the agenda for today, along with laundry -- yay me.

I'll be Skyping with Harmz tonight, so I'll get another dose of limbo from her. I'm by nature a hopeful person. I've been very busy crushing these hopes as they crop up; she has made it clear I have no business hoping that our romantic love can be rescued. I'm glad to have her friendship, she's a great person, but I can't help wanting more sometimes.

Anyway, I'll have to take some more hopes out to the backyard tonight, and shoot them, too.

If it's a sober and a break-even day today, I'm good.

Hope y'all have a good'un.

Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Our AV loves it when there's an underlying issue we can't readily fix and we 'have' to drink over....
Our rationales are so often simply barbed hooks we cast for ourselves.

*****

Hiya Aly, and welcome.
Thumpalumpacus is offline  
The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to Thumpalumpacus For This Useful Post:
ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Glb82 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 09:42 AM
  # 223 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 97
Thank you Odelle

Stronger... Not really.

It took me along time to get to this place. I have learned so much from SR. When I finally started posting, I feel like I got the support I needed. Working in a bar was my excuse for a long time. I'm done with excuses! I still have a long way to go. It's the journey not the destination.
illi1111 is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to illi1111 For This Useful Post:
ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Optimist4ever57 (01-19-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), Thumpalumpacus (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 09:42 AM
  # 224 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 37
Celebrating day 10 by going out to dinner and a comedy club with drinkers..I can't skip it. I sure hope I check in tomorrow morning with another sober day under my belt.
Seep9871 is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Seep9871 For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Optimist4ever57 (01-19-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:09 AM
  # 225 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by Olivia2011 View Post

Sunflower - can you expand on your sessions? I'm liking my hypnosis tape. I saw a hypnotist many years ago. I didn't listen to the tape at night tho. I'm older now and finding this very relaxing. I don't think the man I saw was very good tho. Same with a female therapist I went to. I think you mentioned a site to go to (or maybe it was Gib) where you can see the doctor, etc. What impresses you about this hypnotist ? How do you feel after a session?
Hey Olivia, sounds like you're doing really well and I like your list of things you are grateful for, now that you are sober.

It's funny because I was looking up hypnostist for the last month and honestly picked this guy because he was the closest one to me. I didn't realize that he was a "Stress Management Hypnotist" or that we would be talking for an hour before the hypnosis. So basically I ended up with a therapist and hypnotist in 1. He is genuinely caring and sympathetic, really easy to talk to and has a great sense of humor. My favorite thing about him is that he builds me up by telling me my strong points and because of the way he asks questions, I end up finding my own solutions to my problems rather than him coming up with them. It's very empowering.

It's not what I was expecting as far as hypnosis though. I have also done mp3s in the past and there is always the countdown, then the focus of what you are trying to change, and the count back up. He doesn't do countdowns and never talks about drinking. Instead he points out how relaxed I am and reinforces that I am resourceful, with all the knowledge I need within myself.

I am always so relaxed that I end up not wanting to get out of the recliner at the end! I yawn a lot afterwards too.
I really lucked out this time. I have seen countless therapists in my life and nothing compares to this guy. I do think hypnosis for drinking can be very effective and I know you can buy them online. Is the one you use for alcohol abuse? My personal favorite (online) Hypnotist is Erick Brown.
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), JulySeaCoast (01-15-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:11 AM
  # 226 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by Seep9871 View Post
Celebrating day 10 by going out to dinner and a comedy club with drinkers..I can't skip it. I sure hope I check in tomorrow morning with another sober day under my belt.
Good luck but don't just hope, plan for it! You don't want to have to start back over.
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Thumpalumpacus (01-15-2016), vanaprastha (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:18 AM
  # 227 (permalink)  
Member
 
Trees39's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 1,776
Day 16.

I'm battling an old demon. Drinking to fit in, have fun just like everyone else.

My weak situation is when I want to meet up with one person at a time.

One is a stranger that it is so easy to a have a couple with and feel normal. I may not go on a bender that night but it will bring me a step closer to feeling all the suffering and pain and negative pressure drinking brings. Then I spin out for a week or so drinking then come back to sober.
All because of wanting to please and have one drink with a stranger.

The other situation is with an old drinking buddy.
She can drink or not drink, but when she does its all on and we have a lot of memories together. When I know I'm going out with her I become restless, petulant, want it all, want it now type feelings....

I'm working through them. I'm working my plan like a demon. I'm trying to figure out what's really going on?

I'm fine the way I am and I don't need booze as a social crutch. I want to get far away from the highs and lows of drinking. I just want to live in peace that I know sober brings.

Good wishes to all here.
Trees39 is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Trees39 For This Useful Post:
ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Thumpalumpacus (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:19 AM
  # 228 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by SillyHuman View Post
Morning all.

I am looking at counselors (thanks for the tip Sunflower). My sister has a master's in psychology, and she is one of the craziest, most destructive people I know. My stomach hurts from just looking at the ads. I am so flipping sick of the routine:

Work up hope that counseling will help.
Work up the courage to go.
Make appointment and wait.
Pay the flipping money.
And, nothing worthwhile happens.

At my one and only inpatient stay a year and a half ago, they messed up so bad that they were not allowed to charge me for the stay. Yep, $20,000+ I did not have to pay, and I got my money's worth!

I suspect therapy is just a money-making scam anyway.

I really, really do NOT want to do this.

Can anyone testify that they went to therapy and it was actually worth it?
I'm so sorry you see therapy that way. I wouldn't let the fact that your sister has problems give it a bad wrap. We are all human and we are all flawed. My Mom is a psychiatrist but that doesn't mean she doesn't have her own issues- we all do. People choose this profession to help others. Look at me, I don't work now but when I do I ultimately want to do something that helps others whether it's being a life coach or an energy healer. I don't feel I have to be perfect in order to help others, and I will always have flaws and issues as well.

What is it about therapy that you don't like? Is it just the fact that you have never found one you like or do you have a problem with opening up?

If you don't like dwelling in the past, look for a therapist who practices "Positive Psychology." Instead of rehashing the past they focus on how to change for a better future and how to achieve happiness. My last therapist practiced this and I enjoyed it (although honestly I like to get to the root of issues as well).

I found him on the site I mentioned, through Psychology Today.
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:22 AM
  # 229 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by Trees39 View Post
Day 16.

I'm battling an old demon. Drinking to fit in, have fun just like everyone else.

My weak situation is when I want to meet up with one person at a time.

One is a stranger that it is so easy to a have a couple with and feel normal. I may not go on a bender that night but it will bring me a step closer to feeling all the suffering and pain and negative pressure drinking brings. Then I spin out for a week or so drinking then come back to sober.
All because of wanting to please and have one drink with a stranger.

The other situation is with an old drinking buddy.
She can drink or not drink, but when she does its all on and we have a lot of memories together. When I know I'm going out with her I become restless, petulant, want it all, want it now type feelings....

I'm working through them. I'm working my plan like a demon. I'm trying to figure out what's really going on?

I'm fine the way I am and I don't need booze as a social crutch. I want to get far away from the highs and lows of drinking. I just want to live in peace that I know sober brings.

Good wishes to all here.
I'm sorry you are going through this.
Would you be willing to give up your drinking buddy for good? Is this a person you can hang with in a sober scene instead?
What about the stranger- if you aren't close, why do you feel the need to sabotage your sobriety for this person?
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:24 AM
  # 230 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by illi1111 View Post
Hi Everyone

Day 20!
Last nite was an eye opener. I almost took a drink on autopilot. I was at work (bartender) and Lil John was screaming at me to do shots and I was discussing craft beers with the other bartender and he said try this one and put out the beer he was drinking. My hand was half way to it when I snapped out of it and said no thank you.

I wasn't thinking about getting drunk. I wasn't really thing at all just reacting. But my mind played the tape through for me in a split second. Some amazing change is happening in my thinking process!

Now to work harder on changing my profession so I don't need to put my self in situations like these.

I've worked to hard to let a sip ruin it.

Keep fighting everyone!
Day 20 is amazing, congrats!! Has it been eye opening working in a bar and being surrounded by drunks all the time? I can't even imagine having to work around alcohol at this point. What job are you looking into now?
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:28 AM
  # 231 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by benice View Post

So I made it through last night with flying colors. Went to an open bar event. Had my mind set right. Asked the bartender for a club soda with lime and she said, "Want a splash of cranberry?" What an awesome bar tender!!!
That right there gives me great hope!! Way to go!
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
benice (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Optimist4ever57 (01-19-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:31 AM
  # 232 (permalink)  
Alive in the Superunknown
 
Thumpalumpacus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47N, 98.15W
Posts: 1,460
Originally Posted by Seep9871 View Post
Celebrating day 10 by going out to dinner and a comedy club with drinkers..I can't skip it. I sure hope I check in tomorrow morning with another sober day under my belt.
Remember what's at stake. Your sobriety comes before anything else ... anything else.
Thumpalumpacus is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to Thumpalumpacus For This Useful Post:
ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), DeepBlue (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Optimist4ever57 (01-19-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), Sunflowerlife (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:32 AM
  # 233 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by RallyAly View Post


So far some agitation, a few headaches, and some rises in my HR And BP (which are both low baseline so not terribly concerning). I'm encouraged that I feel the same way as I did for my smoking quit: not filled with nervous resolve, rather feeling, simply, done with it.
Welcome RallyAly! So good to see you here. I'm so sorry about the death of your friend, that must have been heartbreaking.
I love that you say you are "simply done with it." That's exactly how I feel. Drinking is just not fun anymore and when you get to that point there is really no reason to continue, right?
Hope you are having a great sober day 2...
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Optimist4ever57 (01-19-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 10:38 AM
  # 234 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 141
Thank You

Originally Posted by DeepBlue View Post
Hi all - great to see so many of you doing well. Sadly, since joining the January group a few days ago I haven't even been able to start Day 1. Somehow I just can't find the energy to take it on - it all feels like such a huge effort, whilst to carry on drinking is so easy (In the short term). But hopefully my mind is moving in the right direction and I will be able to commit sooner rather than later.
Hi - really pleased to say I finally made it to Day 1 and have nearly competed Day 2. Many thanks to al who supported and encouraged me to start this journey. I am so excited to have started back o the right path again.
DeepBlue is offline  
The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to DeepBlue For This Useful Post:
benice (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Nic233 (01-15-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), Thumpalumpacus (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 11:19 AM
  # 235 (permalink)  
Member
 
patricia68's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Canada
Posts: 1,075
Blog Entries: 1
I'm glad to see familiar names here
I managed to stay sober for almost 6 weeks, survived the holidays...only to have an emotional meltdown on January 2nd, and I've been struggling ever since.
patricia68 is offline  
The Following 14 Users Say Thank You to patricia68 For This Useful Post:
beerbgone (01-15-2016), ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), dickensen (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Nic233 (01-15-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Optimist4ever57 (01-19-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), Thumpalumpacus (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016), tiredofme (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 01:06 PM
  # 236 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Devon, UK
Posts: 59
Day 14 here. Worst. Day. Ever. Almost cracked, the urge to drink was so strong. I kept thinking of you guys and how hard we are all struggling and that has kept me sober.
loopylou69 is offline  
The Following 15 Users Say Thank You to loopylou69 For This Useful Post:
amazingjoy (01-15-2016), beerbgone (01-15-2016), benice (01-15-2016), ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), dickensen (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Nic233 (01-15-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), Optimist4ever57 (01-19-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), Thumpalumpacus (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 01:17 PM
  # 237 (permalink)  
Member
 
Sunflowerlife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 4,182
Blog Entries: 4
Originally Posted by loopylou69 View Post
Day 14 here. Worst. Day. Ever. Almost cracked, the urge to drink was so strong. I kept thinking of you guys and how hard we are all struggling and that has kept me sober.
Sorry Lou but glad you pushed through, that says a lot. I also find that this group is a huge part of why I am 10 days sober. Let's keep on doing what is working for us!
Sunflowerlife is offline  
The Following 8 Users Say Thank You to Sunflowerlife For This Useful Post:
amazingjoy (01-15-2016), beerbgone (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 01:19 PM
  # 238 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2016
Posts: 97
Thank you Sunflowerlife

Working the bar sober was hard the first couple weeks was very hard. But now most of the regulars know I'm not drinking so don't even ask anymore. It is a lot easier to say no now. I find I after I tell them I'm just taking a break they are fine with that. I don't owe them any more explanation.

I guess the shift in perception is my own. Drunks at a bar are always gonna drink, but I don't need to be one of them. Also no one but me can decide if I drink or not. Sounds so simple right? Only took me what seems like forever to get it.

As for a new job... I have a degree in waste water treatment that I have never used. I have started studying to get certified. Then I will go from there. Being sober has made me realize I have been stuck in a lot of places in my life and it's time to move on and do better for myself and my son.
illi1111 is offline  
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to illi1111 For This Useful Post:
beerbgone (01-15-2016), ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), Sunflowerlife (01-15-2016), Thumpalumpacus (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 01:46 PM
  # 239 (permalink)  
Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: toronto
Posts: 15
Advice on getting back a lost career

Hi all,

I am on day 13......doing ok. 7 years of university, bachelors in engineering and mba


And i am tearing down chimneys and any other general labour i am told to do.

Havent been able to build or keep a career job since my marriage ended more than 10 years ago....my 15 and 13 year old were poisoned against me by my ex and hardly speak to them....it has caused me to relapse and be in and out off aa for over 10 years


I finally try to do aa right by getting a sponsor and working the steps....but the guy has stood me up 3 times now .....instructing me to go to group early and he would meet me and we could start the work.....he didnt show up again last night....

Not gonna drink over it....but WTF


HOW DO I START TO REBUILD MY LIFE AND CAREER


ANY ADVICE APPRECIATED
xristoff is offline  
The Following 11 Users Say Thank You to xristoff For This Useful Post:
beerbgone (01-15-2016), benice (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), dickensen (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), JulySeaCoast (01-15-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), SillyHuman (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)
Old 01-15-2016, 01:58 PM
  # 240 (permalink)  
Alive in the Superunknown
 
Thumpalumpacus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: 30.47N, 98.15W
Posts: 1,460
Originally Posted by patricia68 View Post
I'm glad to see familiar names here
I managed to stay sober for almost 6 weeks, survived the holidays...only to have an emotional meltdown on January 2nd, and I've been struggling ever since.
Hang in there and get back on the right foot. Losing a battle doesn't mean losing the war.
Thumpalumpacus is offline  
The Following 10 Users Say Thank You to Thumpalumpacus For This Useful Post:
beerbgone (01-15-2016), ClearCut (01-15-2016), Dee74 (01-15-2016), emme99 (01-16-2016), Meshelly (01-15-2016), Mish (01-18-2016), Olivia2011 (01-15-2016), patricia68 (01-15-2016), Sunflowerlife (01-15-2016), TinkerB (01-15-2016)

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:48 PM.