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Class of November 2015 Part 6

Old 12-11-2015, 05:34 AM
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Fabat - I think I am in agreement with Dee as well. And SwimKim. My first thought was whether your daughter would have cared one way or the other if there was wine?

KIR - I know how you feel. And sometimes it sucks. I don't get why anyone would only want one glass of wine??? So....that means none for me. Ever.

Kiki - Prayers for Kenny! Kenny is very lucky to have you and your daughter in his life to help him through such a terrible time. *hugs*

TGIF!!
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Old 12-11-2015, 05:34 AM
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Good morning class. I’ve been quiet lately, not feeling so well. I think a contributing factor is hypoglycemia, though I haven’t had it diagnosed yet by the doctor. My husband is borderline diabetic and has the test strips. A couple of days ago, after eating a big plate of spaghetti, I had him test my blood sugar and it read 98, which is very low for having had eaten a meal, especially one so high in carbs. So, I’m working diligently to clean up my diet and will schedule an appointment for a physical early next year. I want to get in some sober time so that my body has time to repair itself before having the blood tests done.

Another good reason to tell the AV to shut up, hypoglycemia is not uncommon in alcoholics, that and vitamin deficiencies. I crossed the line of social drinking many years (decades?) ago, one or two drinks out were followed by a bottle of wine or 5-6 beers once I got home. Three weeks free tomorrow!
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Old 12-11-2015, 06:54 AM
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Good Friday morning
I haven't checked in here in a couple days. Today is my day 27 I believe. I need to catch up on all the posts!
I'm doing well and hope everyone else is doing well too. Keeping our heads above water.
I've been focusing on my Weight Watchers plan so much everyday that it really takes the focus off of cravings/drinking thoughts.
I've lost 3 lbs already this week! 42 lbs more to go.
I've been drinking a lot of water lately because I realized wow, when I was drinking, I hardly ever drank water and our bodies really needs plenty of it.
So that's where I am now! Sort of keep having these mini melt downs though about everything crashing down on me personally- not my surrounding life like family. My drinking, anxiety, weight, back pain issues, pouring my heart out overdramaticly to my doctor offices psychologist about my drinking and depression- only to find that my depression was just from my drinking! Ahh. What a year. So excited for this year to be over. 2016 will be what I make it. I can continue on the path I'm on now and one year from now my whole life will be 100% changed for the better,
Or i can get weak and break and be worse off than I was a month ago. Hmm. The choice is ours.
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Old 12-11-2015, 07:29 AM
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Originally Posted by GoldenSands View Post
Good Friday morning
I haven't checked in here in a couple days. Today is my day 27 I believe. I need to catch up on all the posts!
I'm doing well and hope everyone else is doing well too. Keeping our heads above water.
I've been focusing on my Weight Watchers plan so much everyday that it really takes the focus off of cravings/drinking thoughts.
I've lost 3 lbs already this week! 42 lbs more to go.
I've been drinking a lot of water lately because I realized wow, when I was drinking, I hardly ever drank water and our bodies really needs plenty of it.
So that's where I am now! Sort of keep having these mini melt downs though about everything crashing down on me personally- not my surrounding life like family. My drinking, anxiety, weight, back pain issues, pouring my heart out overdramaticly to my doctor offices psychologist about my drinking and depression- only to find that my depression was just from my drinking! Ahh. What a year. So excited for this year to be over. 2016 will be what I make it. I can continue on the path I'm on now and one year from now my whole life will be 100% changed for the better,
Or i can get weak and break and be worse off than I was a month ago. Hmm. The choice is ours.
Great job on the WW and sobriety Goldensands! It's easier to lose weight when we aren't drinking! I wasn't losing any weight despite not drinking and dieting, but at about 4 weeks I've noticed a change. I've lost 5 pounds in the last 7-8 days. (24 total over the last few months since I started my exercise and diet). I'm sure it will slow down, but it's nice to see the empty calories I wasted on alcohol finally kick in.
I'm still bugging a bit about not being able to relax with a glass of wine over dinner, but it looks like that is where my fight is going to be.
My husband reminded me that many "normal" drinkers don't even have wine when out to dinner and that its just a habit of mine and currently in my mindset. Hopefully in time this mindset will change. I know that on my way home from work I rarely get the urge to stop by the market and buy some wine, and I used to get that everyday.!!!! Time time time!!!
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Old 12-11-2015, 08:15 AM
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Morning, All! Glad to hear everyone is hanging in okay. Kiki, I'm sending good thoughts for Kenny. I'm glad you were able to handle that situation sober. Stay strong!

Last night I was on Facebook and my aunt had posted a few pictures from her childhood. She is an alcoholic and it was just so obvious that she was drunk facebooking. It made me sad. She has had a lot of death in her family (most bc of alcohol or drugs) and she's never coped with it. She just keeps drinking. I love her and she is a wonderful person but she just gets so sad and then wallows in her sadness while drunk. I don't want to be that person. I want to be able to cope with life's ups and downs. Just another reason to stay sober.

I hope you guys have a good Friday. Get ready for another super sober weekend!
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Old 12-11-2015, 08:58 AM
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Hey guys... I'm still here, still.sober!!! So incredibly busy it's like I'm shattering into a millions black.shards... so I simply can't drink as it's too hard to.hold it together as it is.... so tired but so much to do. Better get on with it then and stop.bloody moaning!
Happy weekend xx
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Old 12-11-2015, 10:23 AM
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Hi all,

Day 37... Have a safe and sober weekend.

Prayers said for Kenny, Kiki. X
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Old 12-11-2015, 10:35 AM
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I'm back to my Friday blues. Will they ever go away? Will I somehow be okay with staying in on a Friday and through the weekend. Will the excitement I crave eventually subside? Or will I magically become a better person who likes new things? I'm so confused. I can't see pass the life I've been living socially. It wasn't beneficial to me besides the fact that it provided me with comfort and companionship. I'm just tired, physically, and all of this added stress is just tiring me out mentally. I'm looking forward to getting through it SOBER.
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Old 12-11-2015, 11:20 AM
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Hey faithful-routines are hard to change, but finding something different to do helps. Do you have sober friends you could go to dinner with on Friday nights? What about a meeting? Weekends don't seem to bother me in particular, it's more certain things that I associate having a drink with i.e..going out to dinner with hubby or friends. I think it's just going to take time until my "everyday default" thoughts change. Hang in there.
Thanks for your input Ultra and Sober. You're so right. We can't drink normally. I know that I personally could have one glass at dinner and call it good for a "dinner out." However, then I would think I could have one glass if we had company, one glass if we went to a party, one glass while I was cooking dinner, etc... And I know that would never work. I tried the old "two glass" limit for the last 4 years and my two glasses soon became a bottle and then a bottle +. I don't really even get buzzed with one glass anymore so I need to be honest with myself about what it is I'm really looking for!!!!
I am an alcoholic and I can't drink!

Kiki- Prayers going out for Kenny. That is sure an eye opener about ways children can be abused by alcohol!

KIR

Last edited by Keepnitreal; 12-11-2015 at 11:23 AM. Reason: Add
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Old 12-11-2015, 01:17 PM
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Originally Posted by FaithfulAndFree View Post
I'm back to my Friday blues. Will they ever go away? Will I somehow be okay with staying in on a Friday and through the weekend. Will the excitement I crave eventually subside? Or will I magically become a better person who likes new things? I'm so confused. I can't see pass the life I've been living socially. It wasn't beneficial to me besides the fact that it provided me with comfort and companionship. I'm just tired, physically, and all of this added stress is just tiring me out mentally. I'm looking forward to getting through it SOBER.
It will get better. Otherwise, why would anyone stay sober? You quit drinking for a reason; I imagine going out on the weekends wasn't really providing the "comfort and companionship" that you need.

When we give up drinking, we give up a myriad of things. We also allow new things to take the place of what alcohol was doing to us. Eventually, alcohol removes all the excitement from our sober lives, even further burying us in the disease. You will get excitement back. It will be different than when you were drinking, and it will be so much more fulfilling than drinking ever was.

Sorry that turned into a rant! Just please hang in there. Things will improve with time.
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Old 12-11-2015, 01:37 PM
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Back from seeing my counselor today. I cried a little bit when she told me I look much more confident than I did a few months ago. It was a happy cry...maybe the old confident me didn't die during all these years of alcohol and prescription abuse...maybe she's still there...maybe she's coming back
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Old 12-11-2015, 01:59 PM
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Well done folks on resisting... I too find the sheer excitement of making it to Friday a trigger... I need reward and excitement. ...

Instead I'm icing a cake, listening to radio 6, and being bored. My husband is upstairs reading.im lonely and to be honest, quite . frustrated. ... is this it???

At least in the pub you get camaraderie, affection, and fun... even if your liver is ruined and your hangover kills you. I don't want to drink and I'm not going to... but sheesh.... it's going to be lonely and I'm going to need to be sober to keep a tight lid on my feelings for the next 30 years. Must suppress everything now! Sensible and boring is they way forward. ..

Maybe this will pass top and I will become someone else....

Happy weekend folks... xx

Jee, sorry for the miserable post!
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Old 12-11-2015, 02:08 PM
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
Well done folks on resisting... I too find the sheer excitement of making it to Friday a trigger... I need reward and excitement. ...

Instead I'm icing a cake, listening to radio 6, and being bored. My husband is upstairs reading.im lonely and to be honest, quite . frustrated. ... is this it???

At least in the pub you get camaraderie, affection, and fun... even if your liver is ruined and your hangover kills you. I don't want to drink and I'm not going to... but sheesh.... it's going to be lonely and I'm going to need to be sober to keep a tight lid on my feelings for the next 30 years. Must suppress everything now! Sensible and boring is they way forward. ..
That's your AV talking, don't listen

Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
Maybe this will pass top and I will become someone else....
Yes! It will pass and we will become a much better version of ourselves
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Old 12-11-2015, 02:11 PM
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At least in the pub you get camaraderie, affection, and fun.
I think you're looking at it with rosy glasses, enfin - at least remember the bad stuff too, yeah?

I never go to pubs now, and I can promise you ,y social life has never been better or more fun....but it took time to build up to that.

It's going to take you a little time to get over what happened to you last time you where in the pub , and it going to take you a little time to re-appraise your idea of fun and where to find it.

Think about hobbies and interests and things you'd like to do as a starting point...eventually you'll find things you love doing sober and people to do those things with - trust me

Your view of what 'sobriety' will be like is pretty much pure AV. Please recognise that.

You don't have to get through the next 30 years, you just need to get through today
D
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Old 12-11-2015, 02:14 PM
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I think she's coming back too Patricia

D
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Old 12-11-2015, 02:47 PM
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Yeah, I know I know.... I am just a very sociable person... and we live quite isolated and I'm just lonely that's all...
So.many years of using one thing for fun... I'm bound to.miss it at first...even if it did end.in disaster last time!!!

Better goto bed... think I overdosed on icing and sweets .... feeling a bit sick now!!! Too many e numbers! !! Oops....
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Old 12-11-2015, 03:19 PM
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Originally Posted by enfinthechange View Post
Well done folks on resisting... I too find the sheer excitement of making it to Friday a trigger... I need reward and excitement. ...

Instead I'm icing a cake, listening to radio 6, and being bored. My husband is upstairs reading.im lonely and to be honest, quite . frustrated. ... is this it???

At least in the pub you get camaraderie, affection, and fun... even if your liver is ruined and your hangover kills you. I don't want to drink and I'm not going to... but sheesh.... it's going to be lonely and I'm going to need to be sober to keep a tight lid on my feelings for the next 30 years. Must suppress everything now! Sensible and boring is they way forward. ..

Maybe this will pass top and I will become someone else....

Happy weekend folks... xx

Jee, sorry for the miserable post!
Enfin is will get better and hopefully you'll once again find joy in your life. How are things with hubby? Is he talking to you after that episode? Does he want to make things better?
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Old 12-11-2015, 03:27 PM
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Originally Posted by Odelle View Post
Good morning class. Iíve been quiet lately, not feeling so well. I think a contributing factor is hypoglycemia, though I havenít had it diagnosed yet by the doctor. My husband is borderline diabetic and has the test strips. A couple of days ago, after eating a big plate of spaghetti, I had him test my blood sugar and it read 98, which is very low for having had eaten a meal, especially one so high in carbs. So, Iím working diligently to clean up my diet and will schedule an appointment for a physical early next year. I want to get in some sober time so that my body has time to repair itself before having the blood tests done.

Another good reason to tell the AV to shut up, hypoglycemia is not uncommon in alcoholics, that and vitamin deficiencies. I crossed the line of social drinking many years (decades?) ago, one or two drinks out were followed by a bottle of wine or 5-6 beers once I got home. Three weeks free tomorrow!
Congrats on the upcoming 3 weeks tomorrow!!! I hope you feel better soon, I agree that it takes our bodies time to heal from all the alcohol abuse, wishing you well!
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Old 12-11-2015, 03:33 PM
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Morning class......hi from over the horizon on a Saturday morning . Saturday mornings are a reward for the Friday nights.....

Patricia......you sound much better, you've done great. You have come a long way from how you sounded a few weeks back.

Enfin, sure, but there's gotta be something better than 30 years of dull sobriety as a future.

Last night I wanted to drink. Not really a physical craving....more wanting to escape that flat downer feeling .....wanting to zip it all up for a bit.
I think it was Frank Sinatra who said he felt ".... sorry for people who don't drink. Because when they wake up that's as good as they're going to feel all day".

It's a dark joke. Its the alcoholic version of reality......alcohol teaches you that your just 30 minutes or so away from feeling so much brighter, really good, up. Instead of this flat, boring, lonely (insert whatever) state of the moment.

Sober seems to be about accepting that its going to feel like that from time to time. Learning that its not a permanent state, it'll pass. Last night I could have drank to feel better for a while. Today would be written off..... Sat it out with dark chocolate and bad tv....slept and this morning came around, bright fresh, feeling way better.

Takes a while to unlearn all the old stuff tho....

Big group of ppl hitting 3 weeks today on Kiki's list.......congrats to all of you.
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Old 12-11-2015, 04:01 PM
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Friday night check in
At a mall with my gf so she can Christmas shop. It's total madness here.
Sitting on a bench outside the store where she's shopping cause I'm feeling far to claustrophobic for this s*** haha
Give me strength
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