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Class of November 2015 Part 6

Old 12-09-2015, 03:22 PM
  # 81 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by KiKi0615 View Post
You ok Healthy???
Yes I am.

Thanks to all of you for responding.

I did a lot of talking to myself and pacing through the kitchen as getting dinner ready for the family is one of my biggest problems with alcohol. I love to pour a drink while I cook. Tonight I poured coffee and I'm feeling better though my AV is still chatting away. Grrr.

Going to do my best to keep busy and ignore my AV.
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Old 12-09-2015, 03:41 PM
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Originally Posted by Healthygoals View Post
Yes I am. Thanks to all of you for responding. I did a lot of talking to myself and pacing through the kitchen as getting dinner ready for the family is one of my biggest problems with alcohol. I love to pour a drink while I cook. Tonight I poured coffee and I'm feeling better though my AV is still chatting away. Grrr. Going to do my best to keep busy and ignore my AV.
Yay!!! Great job! Tell that AV to F off! Be sure to eat a big meal. That will shut you AV up once & for all! (At least for today).

Triggers:

Hungry? Eat

Angry? Talk to someone, post on SR, breathe, punch a pillow, exercise etc.

Lonely? Post on SR, call a friend or relative

Tired? Sleep


H.A.L.T.
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Old 12-09-2015, 03:49 PM
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Originally Posted by Healthygoals View Post
Oh I really really want a drink right now! Argh!
Hang in there! There is nothing that drink will make better, it only makes it worse! You know this! We're here for you!
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Old 12-09-2015, 04:03 PM
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Now I'm nauseous from too much coffee but hey, whatever works! No desire to drink now...
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Old 12-09-2015, 04:28 PM
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Healthygoals, great job pushing through that craving! Sometimes I eat too many cookies and end up kind of nauseous as well, but it's way better than a hangover and guilt!

Way to go
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:13 PM
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Great to see you're feeling better Healthygoals...eat up, least you'll remember it all in the morning : ) Good night all!
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:23 PM
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Great job pushing through Healthy Goals and Patricia.

Patricia-Do you know how long the withdrawals from Benzo's takes? It seems that your mornings are the toughest for you. What can you get up and do first thing in the morning that you might enjoy and will get you through the morning attack? Do you like music? Yoga? What about you put nice music on and do some yoga or stretching and just listened to your favorite music? Maybe find a new morning ritual that's starts your day in an upbeat way. ( no pun. Intended)

KIR
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:28 PM
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Ultradad-
I've been thinking about you and your struggle with the 12 step tradition and if you should/want to do it or not. Is it the "higher power" aspect or that maybe you don't want to get involved in the AA route?
I went to a meeting today and a lady told me about these 2 guys that had the 12 steps available online and it explained each step and how to complete it. (they were supposed to be funny). If you're interested I could ask for their names and I'm sure you can google them. I'm thinking about checking it out. It was something like Charlie and Joe.

KIR
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:35 PM
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Originally Posted by learntofly View Post
Good morning guys! Day 46 here. I do this silly thing every morning where I write how many days I have into my planner. In a weird way, it helps to keep me accountable.

I'm slowly feeling like I'm gaining energy. I think it's too early to tell if the 5HTP is working.

My AV has been hilarious lately. Out of nowhere, it'll be like "Well, you've been sober 46 days, so you clearly know how serious this drinking thing is. You've proven that. So I think it's okay for you to drink again. You've learned your lesson. " Haha, you're funny AV!
AV is such a dummy don't think it's silly at all to write it in your planner. It's like having a mantra you say to yourself daily. 46 days! Good stuff.
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:38 PM
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Originally Posted by pams View Post
@ Kiki. I would love some planning to get through the holiday season. It's unfortunate that my season isn't really about the festivities that makes me want to drink...it's more about missing loved ones. My Mom has been gone for 10 years, my Dad for 7 years and although I come from a huge family, 5 older brothers, ...and well, they all suck. They cant be bothered with me or something. I don't know. I quit trying. I left far too many family functions crying trying to fit in and be a part of the family; a person can only take so much rejection. My husband's family is far away, except for one brother who lives in the same town. I was best friends with the brother's wife but then after 17 years they decided to call it quits and she moved far away. And 18 months ago he had some hissy fit about something that only makes sense to him and refuses to speak to us. Which is awkward since him and his girlfriend and her kids live in our rental house, next door. Ugh. I was not able to have children of my own, my husband is estranged from his adult daughter....so, it's just him and I during the holidays. Which is by no means the booby prize...he is wonderful. I just get sad sometimes. I miss when my Mom was alive and the Christmas dinners....she was definitely the glue that held my family together.

So yeah...I would love to feel like I am a part of 'something' this holiday season.....
Hugs pams, I can see that the holidays are a lonely time for you. Are there any holiday volunteer opportunities near you? Maybe that would help give you some good feelings on the holiday... Or even some event that you and the husband can do together?
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:47 PM
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Originally Posted by TryingInTexas View Post
Day 25. Closing on 30 . . . Wow . . .

Really wanted a drink on Sunday (still wrestling with this bad financial situation) - kept thinking about it, kept dwelling on it - then suddenly it was just like a guardian angel spoke to me or something. "How will that make anything better?" And I just knew the answer: "It will make me forget for awhile but when I have a hangover tomorrow it will make everything worse." And I didn't drink. I didn't think about it, reason about it -- I just knew.

Is this me? Wow.
Love this post. Good job Tex. Things are hard for me financially too atm. I could drink, but then that would just cost me more money wouldn't it? Along with all the other terribleness of a binge. It'll all turn out ok. Hope that guardian angel sticks around for us both.
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:50 PM
  # 92 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by patricia68 View Post
AV is talking again this morning..."The anxiety is not getting any better, have a drink, take a benzo, numb yourself with something for a while."

I'm exhausted. I'm tired of spending my mornings trying to calm down...I feel like I'm wasting my life.

I know I'm still struggling with benzo withdrawal. I know it will get better. I just get tired of fighting. Why do I have to put all my energy into relaxation techniques and mindfulness and all that stuff when it should be something natural? Our bodies are not meant to be stressed out 24/7! There used to be a time when I could find happiness in little things. When I could laugh and it wasn't forced or fake.

Ok I'll stop...sorry about the rant. Not having a good day...again
When voice says use to calm down, think about how much worse the anxiety is the next day. You have to practice before you become expert. Baby steps. I hope tomorrow is a better day hugs Patricia
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Old 12-09-2015, 05:55 PM
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Originally Posted by Keepnitreal View Post
Great job pushing through Healthy Goals and Patricia.

Patricia-Do you know how long the withdrawals from Benzo's takes? It seems that your mornings are the toughest for you. What can you get up and do first thing in the morning that you might enjoy and will get you through the morning attack? Do you like music? Yoga? What about you put nice music on and do some yoga or stretching and just listened to your favorite music? Maybe find a new morning ritual that's starts your day in an upbeat way. ( no pun. Intended)

KIR
Thank you Keepnitreal. I have no idea how long the benzo withdrawals last. It seems to be different for everybody.

I think you're right, I might try something different tomorrow morning. I need to plan ahead before I get paralyzed with anxiety.
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Old 12-09-2015, 06:15 PM
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Originally Posted by patricia68 View Post
Thank you Keepnitreal. I have no idea how long the benzo withdrawals last. It seems to be different for everybody. I think you're right, I might try something different tomorrow morning. I need to plan ahead before I get paralyzed with anxiety.
Keep pushing through Patricia! You are doing great!!!

It may be stormy now but it never rains forever.
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Old 12-09-2015, 06:16 PM
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Well still on the wagon with more than just another weekend approaching. Company Xmas party on Sat. Nite. I am going into it knowing I'm not going to drink....I'm just not sure how everyone else will interpret my sobriety. For some reason I think everybody will think I'm being rude or "stuck up" for not partaking in the drunk shenanigans. I'm sure it's all in my head though.
Had to tell a really good friend that I don't see much that I didn't want to go have a beer next Friday and that I'm giving it up........
I didn't get a reply text.
I hope he comes around to accept the idea eventually.
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Old 12-09-2015, 07:31 PM
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Tatersalad, I think that you will find your true friends will embrace your sobriety. Your drinking "friends" may not. One of my best friends is an alcoholic and a very heavy drinker, and when I told him I quit drinking he was very supportive. He even makes sure to have sparkling water for me when he throws a party.

All you have to tell people at the party is "no thank you, I'm not drinking (because of x,y,z)." Say it with a smile and no one will think you're being rude or stuck up! And if it gets too crazy or you are uncomfortable, all you have to do is leave. And come Monday morning you will not be the one everyone is gossiping about because they got so smashed and did x,y,z. You can do it!!
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Old 12-09-2015, 07:41 PM
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I thought people would think I was all these things too..but the truth was by and large noone cared very much what I drank

I realise now I thought a lot about drinking - and I assumed everyone else had that preoccupation too - but they don't

D
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:33 PM
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Originally Posted by tatersalad View Post
Well still on the wagon with more than just another weekend approaching. Company Xmas party on Sat. Nite. I am going into it knowing I'm not going to drink....I'm just not sure how everyone else will interpret my sobriety. For some reason I think everybody will think I'm being rude or "stuck up" for not partaking in the drunk shenanigans. I'm sure it's all in my head though. Had to tell a really good friend that I don't see much that I didn't want to go have a beer next Friday and that I'm giving it up........ I didn't get a reply text. I hope he comes around to accept the idea eventually.
Just tell people you are on an antibiotic or something. You could also say you've been having gastrointestinal issues & drinking makes it worse???

I personally have been just telling people that I am trying to get in shape. Most people honestly don't really give a crap if I drink or not. Haha
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:34 PM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
I thought people would think I was all these things too..but the truth was by and large noone cared very much what I drank I realise now I thought a lot about drinking - and I assumed everyone else had that preoccupation too - but they don't D
Yep!!!
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Old 12-09-2015, 09:06 PM
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I noticed the same thing! The only people who seem to pay any attention are the alcoholics that need to have a "partner in crime" and don't want to be hanging out there alone. I think I'm more concerned about it then anybody.
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