Class Of December 2013 - Part 8
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
Dang, y'all are thinkers!
One of my favorite Hunter lyrics (from Mission in the Rain, Jerry Garcia Band):
Ten years ago, I walked this street
My dreams were riding tall
Tonight I would be thankful Lord,
For any dream at all.
Some folks would be happy
Just to have one dream come true
But everything you gather
Is just more that you can lose.
One of my favorite Hunter lyrics (from Mission in the Rain, Jerry Garcia Band):
Ten years ago, I walked this street
My dreams were riding tall
Tonight I would be thankful Lord,
For any dream at all.
Some folks would be happy
Just to have one dream come true
But everything you gather
Is just more that you can lose.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
I watched a "movie" on netflix last night entitled "Happy". Very interesting.
I agree with it. It's a good watch.
One thing as a comparison was that there is a substantial difference between the happiness factor between people who earn 5000 vs 50000 in a modern society. Yet the difference in happiness between 50000 and 5,000,000 is negligible. And actually the 5 mil people are less happy.
Something I had witnessed first hand some years back. It's why I didn't marry that millionaire who was ready to buy the rings.
And some other very interesting observations - statistical data - that prove money and wealth have about a zero correlation to happiness as long as the basic needs are met. Food, shelter and companionship. Food can be a bowl of rice for some.
I agree with it. It's a good watch.
One thing as a comparison was that there is a substantial difference between the happiness factor between people who earn 5000 vs 50000 in a modern society. Yet the difference in happiness between 50000 and 5,000,000 is negligible. And actually the 5 mil people are less happy.
Something I had witnessed first hand some years back. It's why I didn't marry that millionaire who was ready to buy the rings.
And some other very interesting observations - statistical data - that prove money and wealth have about a zero correlation to happiness as long as the basic needs are met. Food, shelter and companionship. Food can be a bowl of rice for some.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: kingston ontario canada
Posts: 656
A few years ago, I read a similar analysis of the happiness/income relationship. It concluded, I recall, that 80K was an optimum income.
Which might further explain why Donald Trump often appears to be a sour windbag.
Which might further explain why Donald Trump often appears to be a sour windbag.
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
I watched "Happy" awhile back, and I've witnessed the stats in real life, as well. Money helps up to a point. I wouldn't mind making $80K, but it's not happening yet if ever. Financial security brings some peace of mind, but beyond that people seem to just complicate their lives, or their focus is so external/material that they find less satisfaction in things that once brought them joy and excitement. Then there is the ability to purchase unlimited quantities of the best scotch, wine, and cocaine available... Ouch.
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
I think I've been lurking and posting a lot today because I just spent two days with a couple of old friends from 20+ years ago. One has been sober for nine years. The other never went into the deep end. We reminisced about good times and how they progressed into not-so-good.
Anyway, this led to a first: I dreamed I was drinking at some kind of party/mini-festival, and during the dream I realized I was drinking and shouldn't have gotten started, kind of like I had temporarily forgotten I was an alcoholic and had quit drinking. This part I have dreamed before. But then I dreamed that I woke up and was relieved it was only a dream. I dreamed that I was laying in bed analyzing my earlier dream. Then I woke up.
I don't ever remember dreaming that I had woke from a dream. I have dreamed that I died but continued living. I used to have dreams that I drove or fell off a cliff, but I would usually wake up before I hit the ground. Once, though, I hit the ground but somehow swam through the earth and emerged at the bottom of a river before swimming to shore. In this way I found myself in an agrarian utopian paradise - heaven on earth, I suppose.
The mind is a terrible thing...
...to waste.
Anyway, this led to a first: I dreamed I was drinking at some kind of party/mini-festival, and during the dream I realized I was drinking and shouldn't have gotten started, kind of like I had temporarily forgotten I was an alcoholic and had quit drinking. This part I have dreamed before. But then I dreamed that I woke up and was relieved it was only a dream. I dreamed that I was laying in bed analyzing my earlier dream. Then I woke up.
I don't ever remember dreaming that I had woke from a dream. I have dreamed that I died but continued living. I used to have dreams that I drove or fell off a cliff, but I would usually wake up before I hit the ground. Once, though, I hit the ground but somehow swam through the earth and emerged at the bottom of a river before swimming to shore. In this way I found myself in an agrarian utopian paradise - heaven on earth, I suppose.
The mind is a terrible thing...
...to waste.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: kingston ontario canada
Posts: 656
Sounds like a lucid dream inside a lucid dream? hmmm. Complicated stuff! And this, on the heels of the Robert Hunter conundrum quote. You might consider a bit of an intellectual holiday, Z, some simpler R&R. What about watching a few seasons of The Bachelorette?
My remembered dreams tend to be variations of a recurring theme involving a lot of wandering, lost, at a foggy airport, running late, forgetting my destination, losing car keys, anxiety and bewilderment building. Possibly this comes from permanent psychic damage associated with being fooled into watching one episode of The Bachelorette 10 years ago?
My remembered dreams tend to be variations of a recurring theme involving a lot of wandering, lost, at a foggy airport, running late, forgetting my destination, losing car keys, anxiety and bewilderment building. Possibly this comes from permanent psychic damage associated with being fooled into watching one episode of The Bachelorette 10 years ago?
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
My wife watches The Bachelorette. I get exposed vicariously and because the TV is on when I walk in the room. Ay caramba. I much prefer Dancing with the Stars, which is a much better way to waste a Monday evening.
Back to work...
Back to work...
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
thanks for reminding me how fortunate I am to not have television programs connected.
Wife did her test, she is worried, we will see.
Hang in there zero, the dream inside a dream dream. Been there before. And I've watched myself get killed more than once - falling and hitting the ground, drowning etc. It is interesting because I am experienced at lucid dreams and I can manipulate them sometimes. I'm actually able to force past dreams if I want. That is cool.
Hey VET, what are the plans for 4th of July. You intend on not drinking?
to think I making more than double the optimum income... now I just wish that I could start to earn above the poverty level. In time... AS soon as the results of test are known and she can get a job, then I can finally figure out what to do. If she didn't pass, looking for job becomes numero uno assignment for me. Then I have to actually make a professional resume and all that jazz. I'd much prefer to go fishing.
Wife did her test, she is worried, we will see.
Hang in there zero, the dream inside a dream dream. Been there before. And I've watched myself get killed more than once - falling and hitting the ground, drowning etc. It is interesting because I am experienced at lucid dreams and I can manipulate them sometimes. I'm actually able to force past dreams if I want. That is cool.
Hey VET, what are the plans for 4th of July. You intend on not drinking?
to think I making more than double the optimum income... now I just wish that I could start to earn above the poverty level. In time... AS soon as the results of test are known and she can get a job, then I can finally figure out what to do. If she didn't pass, looking for job becomes numero uno assignment for me. Then I have to actually make a professional resume and all that jazz. I'd much prefer to go fishing.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
got an email from the dept of army...
I am qualified. However I am not among the "best qualified" for the position.
They'll keep me on file.
It can mean one of two things. Either everyone else who is best qualified actually has done this exact job and is a transfer, or I totally screwed up my application. The only way one could be better qualified than I is to already be doing this job.
I knew when I submitted my app that it wasn't done properly. Their loss.
Wife took her exam today and the buzz around facebook and other emails/texts from her classmates who took it was that they ALL think they failed. One girl told her she sat in the parking lot and cried for two hours after the exam. WOW! Brutal. On the way home my wife asked me if I would still lover her if she failed. What a stupid question. Of course I'll still love her. But she's gonna have to move out...
I am qualified. However I am not among the "best qualified" for the position.
They'll keep me on file.
It can mean one of two things. Either everyone else who is best qualified actually has done this exact job and is a transfer, or I totally screwed up my application. The only way one could be better qualified than I is to already be doing this job.
I knew when I submitted my app that it wasn't done properly. Their loss.
Wife took her exam today and the buzz around facebook and other emails/texts from her classmates who took it was that they ALL think they failed. One girl told her she sat in the parking lot and cried for two hours after the exam. WOW! Brutal. On the way home my wife asked me if I would still lover her if she failed. What a stupid question. Of course I'll still love her. But she's gonna have to move out...
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
Looks like my wife doesn't have to move out. It's official, she passed and has her registered nurse license. I'm more relieved than she is. I don't think I could have handled her wailing if she failed.
What a relief!
What a relief!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
thanks guys.
And now the bad news. This past month the hospital she works for eliminated the "weekend program" for nurses. There was an incentive to work weekends only and get a deal. No more. So they are going to absorb some of the weekend only staff which means the position that was "talked about" to my wife is no longer there. Which I think is bull-sss. The other position she applied for is gone for the same reason. She was offered a part time RN position with less hours than she gets now.
Now I know that my job search becomes more important than her job.
But of course, she doesn't listen to me about job applications etc...
She is still stuck with that soviet mind set and it drives me crazy sometimes.
Soooooooooooooooooooo... It looks like next week I start looking for a job - a real job in anywhere USA. And I take a job with no consideration for her job. She already said this part time gig is perfect because she can start going back to school right away and advance the degree.
Well, I wanted her to finish and supported that. And I do support continuing the degree program etc. But now it is time to be in charge of the income - if I can find a job. And tell her to take any offer that comes even if it means moving to North Carolina. Of course getting her to apply will be a chore in itself.
Anyhow, have a great day, hope your weekend plans are sound and alcohol free. I'm not worried about anything except going fishing right now. James Taylor concert tonight with my wife and 2 sisters. Hope he still has it.
And now the bad news. This past month the hospital she works for eliminated the "weekend program" for nurses. There was an incentive to work weekends only and get a deal. No more. So they are going to absorb some of the weekend only staff which means the position that was "talked about" to my wife is no longer there. Which I think is bull-sss. The other position she applied for is gone for the same reason. She was offered a part time RN position with less hours than she gets now.
Now I know that my job search becomes more important than her job.
But of course, she doesn't listen to me about job applications etc...
She is still stuck with that soviet mind set and it drives me crazy sometimes.
Soooooooooooooooooooo... It looks like next week I start looking for a job - a real job in anywhere USA. And I take a job with no consideration for her job. She already said this part time gig is perfect because she can start going back to school right away and advance the degree.
Well, I wanted her to finish and supported that. And I do support continuing the degree program etc. But now it is time to be in charge of the income - if I can find a job. And tell her to take any offer that comes even if it means moving to North Carolina. Of course getting her to apply will be a chore in itself.
Anyhow, have a great day, hope your weekend plans are sound and alcohol free. I'm not worried about anything except going fishing right now. James Taylor concert tonight with my wife and 2 sisters. Hope he still has it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Virginia
Posts: 451
Hello everyone. Reading your posts reminds me that this is a group of deep thinkers. Brain I'm happy to hear that your wife got her RN but sorry about the left turn in her job prospects. I have a feeling that it's going to work out. I have heard that there is a shortage of RN's in the country, but perhaps not in your immediate area. Thanks for checking on me. As for the Fourth, I'm grilling on the deck and drinking ice tea and water.
I was interested in the discussion about dreams among some of you. Sometimes vivid dreams are a sign of sensitive deep thinking people who reflect on life and are moved by its imponderables. Many great writers and poets struggled with substance abuse - Hemmingway, Tennessee Williams, F. Scott Fitzgerald - The list goes on and on. The tragic and gifted poet Edgar Allen Poe - himself an alcoholic even wrote a powerful poem about life as a dream. I hope you don't mind if I share it with you.
[I]Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow-
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.
I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within my hand
Grains of the golden sand-
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep,
While I weep- while I weep!
O God! can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?
Thank you all for being there. In good times and bad it's good to know that you're only a key stroke away.
I was interested in the discussion about dreams among some of you. Sometimes vivid dreams are a sign of sensitive deep thinking people who reflect on life and are moved by its imponderables. Many great writers and poets struggled with substance abuse - Hemmingway, Tennessee Williams, F. Scott Fitzgerald - The list goes on and on. The tragic and gifted poet Edgar Allen Poe - himself an alcoholic even wrote a powerful poem about life as a dream. I hope you don't mind if I share it with you.
[I]Take this kiss upon the brow!
And, in parting from you now,
Thus much let me avow-
You are not wrong, who deem
That my days have been a dream;
Yet if hope has flown away
In a night, or in a day,
In a vision, or in none,
Is it therefore the less gone?
All that we see or seem
Is but a dream within a dream.
I stand amid the roar
Of a surf-tormented shore,
And I hold within my hand
Grains of the golden sand-
How few! yet how they creep
Through my fingers to the deep,
While I weep- while I weep!
O God! can I not grasp
Them with a tighter clasp?
O God! can I not save
One from the pitiless wave?
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?
Thank you all for being there. In good times and bad it's good to know that you're only a key stroke away.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: PA
Posts: 12,000
thanks for checking in Vet.
you have no idea how well that describes my life...
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?
I wish I could write. I have so many stories to tell. So many chapters. So many tales. The many different lives I've lived all seemingly apart yet related. The brief overlap that fades as my reality once again turned into something completely different. The chameleon who rarely changed back.
As the psychologist who met me a few months ago proclaimed, I was a colorful character. Still am and always will be. Sober now. And although it may seem different at times, it really is not. Another chapter waiting to be written - lived.
you have no idea how well that describes my life...
Is all that we see or seem
But a dream within a dream?
I wish I could write. I have so many stories to tell. So many chapters. So many tales. The many different lives I've lived all seemingly apart yet related. The brief overlap that fades as my reality once again turned into something completely different. The chameleon who rarely changed back.
As the psychologist who met me a few months ago proclaimed, I was a colorful character. Still am and always will be. Sober now. And although it may seem different at times, it really is not. Another chapter waiting to be written - lived.
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
Originally Posted by Vet69 
You can write. Just start doing it.
Saw the doc yesterday. Gonna laser my prostate on Tuesday. Doc says this will mean no more meds or catheters (thank God), but my bladder is damaged, so he's not making any other promises.
Since I was up north I went to an AA meeting (best I've been to yet - no Lord's Prayer), and then a show. Big fun, but back already at the inn and wishing the thing would sell. It's like the movie Groundhog Day here; the same conversations with different people day after day after day... But, it's income. Business is relentless, especially this time of year.
The topic at the AA meeting was anger and resentment. That's a powerful one for me. Those emotions are what pushed me from a relatively fun-loving buzzhound to a surly old drunk. Gratitude is the key as far as I can tell. Whenever I start slipping I try to remember that it's a miracle I'm alive much less walking and even dancing a little.
Anyway, busy busy...
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