Bamboozle

...don't know what to think anymore.

Depression is really bad. Still haven't been back to see therapist...she doesn't give a **** and I'm not sure I can be bothered to go. Therapy should never be about therapy. What happened to therapy being about helping me? For fvck's sake, if you happen to be reading this, stop answering your fvcking phone during session! Pay attention! Help me! If I knew what the fvck to do I would have done it already!

New medical doctor...

I'm not feeling SR.

Maybe it's time to move on.

I'm feeling really good about my sobriety and my self-esteem is still improving.

I don't really have anything more to contribute, but maybe I'll check things every now and again.

There's all of this life to live.

I love you folks...the ones who have helped me out...you know who you are.

This place saved my life.



Peace...

Wow. I really need to change my color scheme...it was okay at first, but it's starting to hurt my brain.


I've been having a lot of ups and downs this past week. I'm still not sleeping well. Maybe in a month I can begin to get my med situation sorted...what I'm on now is causing some problems with memory and whatnot (and of course sleep).

As far as I know I'll get to see a real psychologist in about a month. I hope so...

No spirit...no higher power for me. I need people. It's the social being in me.

I cannot describe how loneliness feels...the pain of always having been alone. Yes, I'm a virgin...total. Not even hand holding.

This is the only place I can talk about this without ridicule. Sometimes I think my situations is funny, though. I’m a gay atheist virgin. I technically have no doctrine to hold me back from getting laid…yet I’m still…celibate (ugh…I hate that word)....

I'm not doing well. Something's wrong with my meds. I'm going to get it worked out.

When I had a moment of clarity I reached out for help. People know what's going on with me. I had a talk with my mother about the seriousness of this and told her what to watch out for. I gave her the name of my therapist and the phone number she can be reached through.

If I get suicidal I will go to the ER.

Yes, I'm still sober. I have to be to deal with this....