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One Year and Under Club Part 51

Old 03-02-2016, 02:20 PM
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Sober jim definitely get something to eat
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Old 03-02-2016, 02:30 PM
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I wonder whether so many of us fight going to AA is at least partly because the AV is trying to maintain control!
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Old 03-02-2016, 02:54 PM
  # 403 (permalink)  
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SoberJim - It's great to see you. Thirty days is a wonderful milestone. For me, milestones represent all my hard work. They're an opportunity to share with others the tools that got me to that point. They're also an opportunity to check in with myself to take stock of whether I'm taking care of myself and investing my time in people and activities that are healthy and build me up.

BoozeFree - It sounds like you had a fun trip to Vegas. It's always nice to get away. Winning money is definitely a bonus! For me sobriety is more of a challenge in the everyday grind than when there's excitement. What healthy things do you want incorporate into your every day life? What steps are you going to take to nurture your sobriety, healthy friendships, etc? AA meetings are a nice start. It takes time to get to know people; I've found the way to feel part of the crowd is to keep going back, share, help set up or clean up, and take on service positions. Baby steps - start with going regularly and see where that leads.

Knb - It sounds like you're doing lots of right things! I'd also add that taking a genuine interest in other people's recovery helps keep my addiction at bay, too. Giving to others, actively listening and responding to others' struggled with addiction, paradoxically helps me.

Babs - I think it's awesome that people notice a positive change in you. When I drank I never thought I was hurting anyone; maybe I wasn't, but I wasn't living up to my potential either. How could I when I was either drunk and checked out, or hungover and checked out, or planning my next drunk??

I avoided AA for some time. I had longstanding biases against lots of concepts I heard about on SR and AA because of negative childhood experiences with relatives in various recovery programs. When I listened to what everyone said, took what worked for me, and put everything else aside, I got out of my own way, transcended my longstanding biases and got help. I'm glad I did. Sober life is GOOD!

Today I went to the funeral of an aunt who died far too young. Her death wasn't a result of her alcoholism, but I do know that as wonderful, and fun, and dynamic, and interesting, and funny, and intelligent, and well liked as she was, as much as she loved her family and appreciated her life, she wasted a lot of time and energy on the bottle that could have been spent being awesome.

I'm going to do whatever it takes to stay sober today, to do the next right thing, to show people I love them, to laugh, work hard, to be authentic, and to live between those claps that Carlos talks about.

I love each and every one of you, Undies!!
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Old 03-02-2016, 03:40 PM
  # 404 (permalink)  
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Checking in. Tomorrow will be 10 months for me. Spring is here and I feel like one of those hibernating animals that are starting to poke their heads out and start the living process again. Feel like it happened in the nick of time--I can feel myself starting to lean towards depression a little, I know I just need to indulge myself a little and that will abate. What a dumb thing really--just take time to do something you like--I'll never understand why it's so hard for me to do that. I mean I'll do stuff I like but it always must have some sort of productive element to it. I need to just go out and see a movie, something that I really like--won't necessarily improve my life but my psyche. Wish I could go on some sort of mini vaca but with my new job it's hard and our future is still up in the air. I am so tired of Haggen postponing the auction. It is just nerve wracking not knowing what is going to happen. At least I have easy stepwork this week--my sponsor just told me to read some of the stories in the big book :-) Going back and doing step one-( I didn't realize there was anything to actually do with that) was good, writing out sort of my story with alcohol and the many ways I let it take control of my life. I also realized that no one--absolutely no one--realized I was an alcoholic, least of all myself and if it weren't for me getting passed over at work--I would have never known it myself and probably just stayed the same miserable way. Now my life isn't always great but at least it's not the same old crap. It's and adventure again.
Well, hang in there everyone ttfn.
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Old 03-02-2016, 04:02 PM
  # 405 (permalink)  
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Congratulations Blue Fairy

D
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Old 03-02-2016, 11:58 PM
  # 406 (permalink)  
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Hey guys! Just coming by to say hi. Having a hectic week at work but all good with me! Have a great day!
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Old 03-03-2016, 01:37 AM
  # 407 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Saskia View Post
I wonder whether so many of us fight going to AA is at least partly because the AV is trying to maintain control!
Hit the nail on the head Saskia. I went to AA six years ago and left after a year. Hated it. But that's because I didnt want to believe I had a problem. I was still determined that I could moderate. I didn't have a strong desire to quit drinking and AA is about quitting for good.

Now I go back with open arms and on my knees. I surrender. I accept defeat and that I am powerless over alcohol. I want to stop for good. I like AA
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Old 03-03-2016, 01:40 AM
  # 408 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by gleefan View Post
SoberJim - It's great to see you. Thirty days is a wonderful milestone. For me, milestones represent all my hard work. They're an opportunity to share with others the tools that got me to that point. They're also an opportunity to check in with myself to take stock of whether I'm taking care of myself and investing my time in people and activities that are healthy and build me up.

BoozeFree - It sounds like you had a fun trip to Vegas. It's always nice to get away. Winning money is definitely a bonus! For me sobriety is more of a challenge in the everyday grind than when there's excitement. What healthy things do you want incorporate into your every day life? What steps are you going to take to nurture your sobriety, healthy friendships, etc? AA meetings are a nice start. It takes time to get to know people; I've found the way to feel part of the crowd is to keep going back, share, help set up or clean up, and take on service positions. Baby steps - start with going regularly and see where that leads.

Knb - It sounds like you're doing lots of right things! I'd also add that taking a genuine interest in other people's recovery helps keep my addiction at bay, too. Giving to others, actively listening and responding to others' struggled with addiction, paradoxically helps me.

Babs - I think it's awesome that people notice a positive change in you. When I drank I never thought I was hurting anyone; maybe I wasn't, but I wasn't living up to my potential either. How could I when I was either drunk and checked out, or hungover and checked out, or planning my next drunk??

I avoided AA for some time. I had longstanding biases against lots of concepts I heard about on SR and AA because of negative childhood experiences with relatives in various recovery programs. When I listened to what everyone said, took what worked for me, and put everything else aside, I got out of my own way, transcended my longstanding biases and got help. I'm glad I did. Sober life is GOOD!

Today I went to the funeral of an aunt who died far too young. Her death wasn't a result of her alcoholism, but I do know that as wonderful, and fun, and dynamic, and interesting, and funny, and intelligent, and well liked as she was, as much as she loved her family and appreciated her life, she wasted a lot of time and energy on the bottle that could have been spent being awesome.

I'm going to do whatever it takes to stay sober today, to do the next right thing, to show people I love them, to laugh, work hard, to be authentic, and to live between those claps that Carlos talks about.

I love each and every one of you, Undies!!
Gosh what a lovely positive post. Loved reading it . :-))))
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Old 03-03-2016, 01:43 AM
  # 409 (permalink)  
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Gleefan I feel your joy today. 38 days sober. It's been a roller coaster ride so far but glad I hopped on board. I will take whateve highs and sharp lows, bends and twists that goes along with it. I won't be coming off!
Just for today I oday I feel on top of the world this morning.
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Old 03-03-2016, 01:47 AM
  # 410 (permalink)  
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Wow Bluefairy. Ten months. What an achievement. This is what I love about this thread. You guys are showing me that there is a life without drinking.

I also need to do step work but can't find any worksheets on the Internet
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Old 03-03-2016, 02:03 AM
  # 411 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by knb02 View Post
Gleefan I feel your joy today. 38 days sober. It's been a roller coaster ride so far but glad I hopped on board. I will take whateve highs and sharp lows, bends and twists that goes along with it. I won't be coming off!
Just for today I oday I feel on top of the world this morning.
For me the first month was the hardest although you encounter different kinds of problems as you progress. The truth of it is though, if you have proved that you can get over that first month, you can get over any number. You just need to keep wanting it enough. In my case, as my self esteem returned, so did my joy in life. For the first months, particularly the first 3, I thought I might never be happy again. Now I've never been happier!
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Old 03-03-2016, 02:09 AM
  # 412 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by amp123 View Post
For me the first month was the hardest although you encounter different kinds of problems as you progress. The truth of it is though, if you have proved that you can get over that first month, you can get over any number. You just need to keep wanting it enough. In my case, as my self esteem returned, so did my joy in life. For the first months, particularly the first 3, I thought I might never be happy again. Now I've never been happier!
Awww. That is so encouraging to hear. I won't quit. I feel like I am slowly seeing the light. despite my struggles I have experienced immense joy in the past 38 days. My life is productive, my mental thinking is sharp and I laugh ALOT with my son.

Ps sorry about my typos. Phones for you
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Old 03-03-2016, 02:09 AM
  # 413 (permalink)  
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KNB everyone here who has hung around longer than we should ( the Undie Graduates!) keep coming back offering support and the wisdom of our own experiences of recovery, because we all still remember what it is like in those early days;
It is easy to feel that no one understands what it's like, yet here? We may have walked different paths to SRs front door, but we all carry similar baggage. Here we can lay that baggage down, even open it up and share the load, suddenly we're not carting so much around and that evil little bugger AV isn't saying anything we want to listen to.

BeFree, I know you are not comfortable in big groups anyway, so AA will be tough on you until you get familiar with faces. I feel sometimes too, that our mood can affect how comfortable we feel around strangers, perhaps before the next meeting you could do some relaxation techniques and positive visualisation? I know that you have to be strong and in control at your work, so perhaps you need to bring that persona to AA, tell yourself that everyone there needs your assurance, it may bring out your confidence.

We are so used to telling ourselves we are weak, stupid, awful, we forget. Take a moment to think about how long you have been sober 32 days(great going SJ!) 38 days KNB, or 10 month -awesome BF and think of the strength of character it takes to maintain that sobriety.
You are strong people, you rock!

Babs, those that say don't look back, I feel, are saying don't live in the past; don't live in a world of what ifs and why didn't Is? Only a fool wouldn't want to remind themselves of the past so as not to continue making the same mistakes, and you, Babs, are no fool. You may not have the length of sobriety of some here, but you have fought like a tigress to obtain it, coming back time and again when others would have just taken the easy path. So yes, keep fresh in your mind the things you want to ensure you don't repeat, but let go the regrets of time wasted.

Much like the regret many of us less sylphlike folk who regret the chocolate bar we just gorged; it's eaten, the calories are already adding another layer to my hips, all I can do is change my thoughts on the next time I pass the candy aisle and out on my running shoes. Past is past, gone and done. Can't be changed. The future though? That is ours to shape however we want.

BF, sounds like you need a little self indulgence, perhaps a spa day at home, hot bath, fluffy towels face mask, music, and phone off the hook. A mini staycation!
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Old 03-03-2016, 02:12 AM
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Good morning
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Old 03-03-2016, 04:24 AM
  # 415 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by tootsl1 View Post
KNB everyone here who has hung around longer than we should ( the Undie Graduates!) keep coming back offering support and the wisdom of our own experiences of recovery, because we all still remember what it is like in those early days;
It is easy to feel that no one understands what it's like, yet here? We may have walked different paths to SRs front door, but we all carry similar baggage. Here we can lay that baggage down, even open it up and share the load, suddenly we're not carting so much around and that evil little bugger AV isn't saying anything we want to listen to.

BeFree, I know you are not comfortable in big groups anyway, so AA will be tough on you until you get familiar with faces. I feel sometimes too, that our mood can affect how comfortable we feel around strangers, perhaps before the next meeting you could do some relaxation techniques and positive visualisation? I know that you have to be strong and in control at your work, so perhaps you need to bring that persona to AA, tell yourself that everyone there needs your assurance, it may bring out your confidence.

We are so used to telling ourselves we are weak, stupid, awful, we forget. Take a moment to think about how long you have been sober 32 days(great going SJ!) 38 days KNB, or 10 month -awesome BF and think of the strength of character it takes to maintain that sobriety.
You are strong people, you rock!

Babs, those that say don't look back, I feel, are saying don't live in the past; don't live in a world of what ifs and why didn't Is? Only a fool wouldn't want to remind themselves of the past so as not to continue making the same mistakes, and you, Babs, are no fool. You may not have the length of sobriety of some here, but you have fought like a tigress to obtain it, coming back time and again when others would have just taken the easy path. So yes, keep fresh in your mind the things you want to ensure you don't repeat, but let go the regrets of time wasted.

Much like the regret many of us less sylphlike folk who regret the chocolate bar we just gorged; it's eaten, the calories are already adding another layer to my hips, all I can do is change my thoughts on the next time I pass the candy aisle and out on my running shoes. Past is past, gone and done. Can't be changed. The future though? That is ours to shape however we want.

BF, sounds like you need a little self indulgence, perhaps a spa day at home, hot bath, fluffy towels face mask, music, and phone off the hook. A mini staycation!
Maan! Another fabulous uplifting post. I like this group. Everyone talks so much sense here and I feel a sense of serenity. I am in the feb 2016 group. It's a great bunch of people but everyone is struggle and it's overwhelming at times. Sometimes despairing
The best for me is for someone to hold my hand and guide me through the mess. I feel very comfortable here. Like I have found my parents lol 😂
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Old 03-03-2016, 04:25 AM
  # 416 (permalink)  
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Morning soberwolf
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Old 03-03-2016, 06:25 AM
  # 417 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by knb02 View Post
Maan! Another fabulous uplifting post. I like this group. Everyone talks so much sense here and I feel a sense of serenity. I am in the feb 2016 group. It's a great bunch of people but everyone is struggle and it's overwhelming at times. Sometimes despairing
The best for me is for someone to hold my hand and guide me through the mess. I feel very comfortable here. Like I have found my parents lol 😂
I feel exactly the same way about everybody on this thread. It is awesome! This has become my go to place to keep me focused on staying sober and reading different perspectives and encouragement has helped me a lot. It sounds like you do have a good plan in place and we are all here for you when you need it.

Congratulations on 10 months Bluefairy!
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Old 03-03-2016, 06:37 AM
  # 418 (permalink)  
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Another great, sober morning :-)

Toots, my dear friend, super post!

Congratulations to all of us on another sober day. My life is so incredibly much better.

For all of you who haven't known me that long, I'd like to add a bit of a footnote. We all have so many similarities yet also many differences. It took me over 2 years after joining SR to stop having regular relapses. After I had been sober for about 8 or 9 months, my PTSD got triggered and I had a very brief (about 2 days) relapse. I was very disappointed. But, I went immediately to my pdoc and got some extra help with short-term meds and that very brief relapse didn't continue.

I'm not in any way trying to discourage anyone and most definitely don't advocate anyone following that part of my path! Since then, I am very aware of just how thin the line can be between sober and not. Most of the time I'm finding it easy but I have a much stronger respect now for just how sneaky the AV is. I have made it a priority to check in to SR every day and read and post on 4 different threads. I also read the newcomer's posts which can be emotionally difficult at times. It does remind me why I never want to go back there.

I am grateful every day for my sobriety and you all play a big part in that. Being part of your developing sobriety strengthens my own.
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Old 03-03-2016, 06:39 AM
  # 419 (permalink)  
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And congrats on the soberversaries
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Old 03-03-2016, 06:46 AM
  # 420 (permalink)  
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Hi All - Sakia - I could have written your post. Thank you for sharing.
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