Class of August 2014 Part 18
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: peterborough uk
Posts: 1,171
Determind, never grow up dude!
Hobbers, glad it helped. It helped me to refresh my memory, so thank you too. Rooting for you, here for you x
So, happy Saturday folks! Productive day starting with a biggie for me. Met some girls at frankly and beanies for breakfast as planned. Got there, there was a gas leak. Had to go somewhere else. They all said wetherspoons, and my Av was salivating. See, when other people heard it, they thought ooooh cheap breakfasts! Not my Av, oh no. My Av thought about an all night bender for less than 50 quid, and breakfast beer followed by shots, a bottle or 2 of wine etc leading to said all night bender. Head and heart had slight battle which felt like hours, but was only seconds. Without skipping a beat I said sure and off we went. Get in the pub, go to the bar, order, eat, enjoy, chat, chill, leave. Success! Totally killed the wetherspoons test this time! That's progress on, last time! Hurrah!
Came home, built a cabin bed, dressing table and stool. Watered the garden, made the bed and put the washing out. Good day! Now going to cook a simple tea of various loaded jacket potato's and stick a movie on with my kick ass diet coke in hand. Another sober Saturday kids, check!
What's everyone up to for fathers day? Any grand plans? I lost my dad suddenly a few years ago. We go for brekkie together somewhere as a family and raise a toast, and it's quite lovely actually. He's with us in spirit. What lovely plans do you all have? Would love to hear happy fathers day tales x
Much love guys #nosausages!
Hobbers, glad it helped. It helped me to refresh my memory, so thank you too. Rooting for you, here for you x
So, happy Saturday folks! Productive day starting with a biggie for me. Met some girls at frankly and beanies for breakfast as planned. Got there, there was a gas leak. Had to go somewhere else. They all said wetherspoons, and my Av was salivating. See, when other people heard it, they thought ooooh cheap breakfasts! Not my Av, oh no. My Av thought about an all night bender for less than 50 quid, and breakfast beer followed by shots, a bottle or 2 of wine etc leading to said all night bender. Head and heart had slight battle which felt like hours, but was only seconds. Without skipping a beat I said sure and off we went. Get in the pub, go to the bar, order, eat, enjoy, chat, chill, leave. Success! Totally killed the wetherspoons test this time! That's progress on, last time! Hurrah!
Came home, built a cabin bed, dressing table and stool. Watered the garden, made the bed and put the washing out. Good day! Now going to cook a simple tea of various loaded jacket potato's and stick a movie on with my kick ass diet coke in hand. Another sober Saturday kids, check!
What's everyone up to for fathers day? Any grand plans? I lost my dad suddenly a few years ago. We go for brekkie together somewhere as a family and raise a toast, and it's quite lovely actually. He's with us in spirit. What lovely plans do you all have? Would love to hear happy fathers day tales x
Much love guys #nosausages!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 522
Hey all!
We are having a grill out for Father's Day-just plan to spend the day relaxing.
Great to have you back, Hobbers! I like myself so much better now that I don't drink. And I like myself so much more, that others like me more, too. Quitting drinking didn't make my life immediately better, but in the last 10 months I've been learning how to get out of my own way and stop suffering for no reason.
I like the ice cream analogy, Pink. That's a great way to look at it!
We are having a grill out for Father's Day-just plan to spend the day relaxing.
Great to have you back, Hobbers! I like myself so much better now that I don't drink. And I like myself so much more, that others like me more, too. Quitting drinking didn't make my life immediately better, but in the last 10 months I've been learning how to get out of my own way and stop suffering for no reason.
I like the ice cream analogy, Pink. That's a great way to look at it!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
Back to day 1. I was doing so good. Got weak and fell back into the same habit. Ugh!! What is wrong with me?? There are times when my head is clear and I am strong. The I get overly confident and start thinking I can have one, I can handle this. Wrong!! I went 2 weeks without drinking. I know I can do this. I just wish I wouldn't keep slipping up.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: London, Uk
Posts: 1,694
Hey all
Hoping you are all doing well - somehow Saturday passed me by in Internet land. Had a busy day starting with AA, some shopping and organising and then I did my best training run so far, very happy - but then slept for ages afterwards. Lol.
Hobbers - good to see you. It's so difficult the moderation thing and took me a while to realise it could never work as I headed down a slippery slope. I remember a fist pump once on the way home from work / pub when I had not drank. It was a white knuckle evening not to. And guess what? The following day was one of my worst incidences ever as a "reward" Sometimes I think alcohol just lies in wait to pounce and hits us all the harder when it does without sober muscles.
Today I am doing some easy gym work and later going to a concert to see Kylie and Grace Jones which should be fun. I never did concert drinking weirdly due to the fear of getting into a lot of trouble around lots of people so I am not worried about AV tonight.
I hope everyone has a great Father's Day. My dad died a few years ago, so will be doing the same as Pink with memories and a bit of reflection this morning.
Hoping you are all doing well - somehow Saturday passed me by in Internet land. Had a busy day starting with AA, some shopping and organising and then I did my best training run so far, very happy - but then slept for ages afterwards. Lol.
Hobbers - good to see you. It's so difficult the moderation thing and took me a while to realise it could never work as I headed down a slippery slope. I remember a fist pump once on the way home from work / pub when I had not drank. It was a white knuckle evening not to. And guess what? The following day was one of my worst incidences ever as a "reward" Sometimes I think alcohol just lies in wait to pounce and hits us all the harder when it does without sober muscles.
Today I am doing some easy gym work and later going to a concert to see Kylie and Grace Jones which should be fun. I never did concert drinking weirdly due to the fear of getting into a lot of trouble around lots of people so I am not worried about AV tonight.
I hope everyone has a great Father's Day. My dad died a few years ago, so will be doing the same as Pink with memories and a bit of reflection this morning.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: London, Uk
Posts: 1,694
Hey Rah
Glad to see you and you posted straight away, that's always good. You can do it. What triggered the slip last night? Was it the bar on Saturday? Maybe we can offer some help. You can do this, keep going xx
Glad to see you and you posted straight away, that's always good. You can do it. What triggered the slip last night? Was it the bar on Saturday? Maybe we can offer some help. You can do this, keep going xx
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
What caused the slip...my husband and I met my parents for lunch for Father's Day. Rather than ordering a soda, I ordered a beer, which led to 2. Then instead of leaving I told my husband we should have another so we grabbed 2 seats at the bar. Two beers led to many. I feel in the parking lot on the way out. I'm thinking that I need to stay away from bars, at least until I build up my strength/muscle. I've been doing a lot of soul searching lately. Feel like I have some things straightened out. So I don't know why I said we should have another. If I didn't we would have left without things getting out of hand. My husband didn't say anything to me this morning except express concern about my knee and the fact that I am traveling today (at the airport already) and didn't get s good nights sleep.
I really want to do better. I have been struggling with this for nearly 5 years. I wonder why I have this problem. Alcohol abuse runs in my family...both my parents. It seems that I've had this binge drinking problem my whole life. When I was a teenager and was experimenting with drinking I remember binge drinking. College too. I had gastric bypass in sept 2009. That changed things with my body so alcohol hits me hard.
I'm thinking that I need to set short term and long term goals. Short term, wrack up the of not drinking and get through a weekend without blowing it. Long term...be able to post on 6/21/2016 that I have been sober for a year!
I really want to do better. I have been struggling with this for nearly 5 years. I wonder why I have this problem. Alcohol abuse runs in my family...both my parents. It seems that I've had this binge drinking problem my whole life. When I was a teenager and was experimenting with drinking I remember binge drinking. College too. I had gastric bypass in sept 2009. That changed things with my body so alcohol hits me hard.
I'm thinking that I need to set short term and long term goals. Short term, wrack up the of not drinking and get through a weekend without blowing it. Long term...be able to post on 6/21/2016 that I have been sober for a year!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: CapeCod, MA
Posts: 842
Greetings!
Rah, if you are anything like me, it was not the decision to drink more at the bar that did you in, it was the decision to order one beer in the first place. I am sure you thought you would have one or two, have a lovely time, be fine and go home. Unfortunately, people like us cannot do that. One leads to many.
I am going to a graduation party today. The perverted one in my book club's youngest son graduated from Dartmouth; she is having the party today so her ex-husband will not get to spend the day with his second wife and step-children, as he will feel obligated to be there. She is having it at an exclusive country club that her brothers belong to. This should be something. I have never seen the ex-husband. Bob is in Florida visiting his father, so I am going with a few other women from the book club. If I was still drinking I would be worried about how many I could drink there without it being noticeable, drinking before and worrying that I was slurring my words. Now, I am totally relaxed and looking forward to it!
Let's keep on keeping on!
Rah, if you are anything like me, it was not the decision to drink more at the bar that did you in, it was the decision to order one beer in the first place. I am sure you thought you would have one or two, have a lovely time, be fine and go home. Unfortunately, people like us cannot do that. One leads to many.
I am going to a graduation party today. The perverted one in my book club's youngest son graduated from Dartmouth; she is having the party today so her ex-husband will not get to spend the day with his second wife and step-children, as he will feel obligated to be there. She is having it at an exclusive country club that her brothers belong to. This should be something. I have never seen the ex-husband. Bob is in Florida visiting his father, so I am going with a few other women from the book club. If I was still drinking I would be worried about how many I could drink there without it being noticeable, drinking before and worrying that I was slurring my words. Now, I am totally relaxed and looking forward to it!
Let's keep on keeping on!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
Scooterboo you are right. It is that 1st drink. There were plenty of decision points yesterday, choices I could have made to not be feeling like this again or to stop the tumble. I am a smart woman. I can't understand why I can't just say I'm not drinking anymore and be done with it.
It seems like drinking at bar has become a habit with my husband, the thing we do together. It's become our hobby or pastime. My husband and I live a pretty structured life right now. He's retired but I'm not so our days are centered around my work day. My husband doesn't work and has not ventured out in our new city to find a hobby or a way to socialize with people. I feel like he waits for me to come home everyday. When I come home I am tired. I spend my day at work talking/attending meetings so when I come home I am not really interested in socializing. It seems that our conversations have gotten somewhat stale since our world has become very small.When I drink with my husband it's usually at a bar or at a restaurant bar. I find the atmosphere to be festive. When we drink we seem to relax and talk more. I think we need to replace this "hobby" with something else. Seems like thats a no brainer and still we've not found a replacement. While I do this with my husband I know this is my problem. I need to get control of this.
It seems like drinking at bar has become a habit with my husband, the thing we do together. It's become our hobby or pastime. My husband and I live a pretty structured life right now. He's retired but I'm not so our days are centered around my work day. My husband doesn't work and has not ventured out in our new city to find a hobby or a way to socialize with people. I feel like he waits for me to come home everyday. When I come home I am tired. I spend my day at work talking/attending meetings so when I come home I am not really interested in socializing. It seems that our conversations have gotten somewhat stale since our world has become very small.When I drink with my husband it's usually at a bar or at a restaurant bar. I find the atmosphere to be festive. When we drink we seem to relax and talk more. I think we need to replace this "hobby" with something else. Seems like thats a no brainer and still we've not found a replacement. While I do this with my husband I know this is my problem. I need to get control of this.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,445
I don't think you should be responsible for your husband finding things to do or having fun now he's retired Rah...
and I don't think it's unreasonable of you to say hey I have a problem lets do something else than hang out in bars.
D
and I don't think it's unreasonable of you to say hey I have a problem lets do something else than hang out in bars.
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
It occurred to me today that while I have been dabbling with staying sober I don't think I've fully committed. Maybe I've been in denial. I have to snap out of it. This isn't how 47 year old women should live or act. I guess I've been telling myself "this isn't so bad", it only happens once in a while. The truth is it only happens once in a while month after month. I feel so bad about things I've done in the midst of one of my episodes. So embarrassing. Today taking care of physical issues as a result of my binge. Getting my head right to commit fully to changing my life.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
Took some new steps tonight...I think I need to go for counseling. I found a weight loss surgery center in my new town. I'm going to call them to see if they offer counseling. I was thinking that I need some extra help and thought counseling like that may help understand if and how my gastric bypass surgery plays into what is going on with me.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: London, Uk
Posts: 1,694
Morning to everyone from London
Hope everyone had a good weekend. I enjoyed the concert last night and managed plenty of dancing around diet Pepsi in hand. And I remember it all and feel pretty fresh on the way into work this morning. A coffee would not go amiss though, he he.
Rah, I think it's great that you are looking for some additional things for your plan. I do counselling each Tuesday. It really helps me. I also try to get to three AA meetings per week, and always a Saturday morning one without fail (unless I am away) Its a little easier for me as my partner doesn't drink, but we try and do something together every weekend that doesn't involve bars - could be a concert, the cinema, walking in the local park, visiting a museum. There will be something that you can start doing with your husband I am sure. Keep going, you can and will do this!
Best wishes to all. I have a busy week ahead and need to squeeze in plenty of training as my 10k race is only three weeks away. A day at a time though :-)
Hope everyone had a good weekend. I enjoyed the concert last night and managed plenty of dancing around diet Pepsi in hand. And I remember it all and feel pretty fresh on the way into work this morning. A coffee would not go amiss though, he he.
Rah, I think it's great that you are looking for some additional things for your plan. I do counselling each Tuesday. It really helps me. I also try to get to three AA meetings per week, and always a Saturday morning one without fail (unless I am away) Its a little easier for me as my partner doesn't drink, but we try and do something together every weekend that doesn't involve bars - could be a concert, the cinema, walking in the local park, visiting a museum. There will be something that you can start doing with your husband I am sure. Keep going, you can and will do this!
Best wishes to all. I have a busy week ahead and need to squeeze in plenty of training as my 10k race is only three weeks away. A day at a time though :-)
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 1,347
Happy Monday guys!
Having coffee and putting on a smile and proper attitude for the week. Rah, sounds like a good step in the right direction. You can get to where you want to be. Do not give up.
"Thought is the sculptor who can create the person you want to be." Thoreau
Eye on the prize
Having coffee and putting on a smile and proper attitude for the week. Rah, sounds like a good step in the right direction. You can get to where you want to be. Do not give up.
"Thought is the sculptor who can create the person you want to be." Thoreau
Eye on the prize
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 625
Day 2 for me! I spent some time looking through this site and threads. So many good posts; stories! Starting my day thinking about all of the things I have to be grateful for:
My husband
My daughters & granddaughter
My parents and sister
My 3 pups
My job
My salary
Our apartment
My health
My husband and I are in a good spot financially. We have a plan to pay off all of our debt by next March and April. Good stuff!
Also thinking about changes I need to make:
Need to find non-alcohol things to do with my hubby
Need to incorporate exercise into my routine.
Need to start going to church
Need to be able to overcome this guilt and embarrassment I feel about all of the stupid stuff I've done while under the influence.
One day at a time..alcohol free
Long term goal - on 6/21/16 celebrate 1 year sober
My husband
My daughters & granddaughter
My parents and sister
My 3 pups
My job
My salary
Our apartment
My health
My husband and I are in a good spot financially. We have a plan to pay off all of our debt by next March and April. Good stuff!
Also thinking about changes I need to make:
Need to find non-alcohol things to do with my hubby
Need to incorporate exercise into my routine.
Need to start going to church
Need to be able to overcome this guilt and embarrassment I feel about all of the stupid stuff I've done while under the influence.
One day at a time..alcohol free
Long term goal - on 6/21/16 celebrate 1 year sober
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 522
Awesome, Rah! I think you are heading in the right direction. When I made a concrete commitment to quit drinking, the guilt about what I had done faded away.
Happy to be sober, today! Excited to start the week.
Gotta run! Strength and love to y'all!
Happy to be sober, today! Excited to start the week.
Gotta run! Strength and love to y'all!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: CapeCod, MA
Posts: 842
Rah, I was going to write about the same thing Choobie did; the guilt goes away with time. Eventually you realize that life is much, much better without the worrying, hangovers, necessary plans, blackouts, embarrassment, etc. And, I find I am spending much less; not only did I spend money on alcohol, delivery meals, drinks out; I also had a habit of ordering items online when I was sloshed. There were many times I had no idea what was in the UPS box at my door!
Let's keep on keeping on.
Let's keep on keeping on.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
