Class of October 2015 Part 2
Member
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 4,860
Well, how's this for SR mind meld. MLD and I both began our day chuckling over Bloom County. And it turns out we went to the same place today -- only opposite sides of it. Looks like you were up and at 'em well before me, though!
This is the St. Croix from the Minnesota side, looking across at Wisconsin.
Tetra, how lucky you are to live near the sea. Ruby, thank you for sharing those interesting photos from Chicago. I hope that life is peaceful as possible for you. And you, too, Brynn. I'm thinking your neighbors are pleasant because you're nice!
Jsbohdi, you may already have seen similar counsel elsewhere on SR but the general consensus is that it's best to wait to get into dating/relationships for a year after sobriety. Perhaps that's food for thought -- maybe make sobriety your sole concentrated focus outside of work so you can be your best. The XYs will still be there.
So warm and sunny today. Unseasonable, but I'll take it. Am somewhere around 85 percent over that dreadful bug. Hope all are doing well, especially those new to sobriety. It gets better.
This is the St. Croix from the Minnesota side, looking across at Wisconsin.
Tetra, how lucky you are to live near the sea. Ruby, thank you for sharing those interesting photos from Chicago. I hope that life is peaceful as possible for you. And you, too, Brynn. I'm thinking your neighbors are pleasant because you're nice!
Jsbohdi, you may already have seen similar counsel elsewhere on SR but the general consensus is that it's best to wait to get into dating/relationships for a year after sobriety. Perhaps that's food for thought -- maybe make sobriety your sole concentrated focus outside of work so you can be your best. The XYs will still be there.
So warm and sunny today. Unseasonable, but I'll take it. Am somewhere around 85 percent over that dreadful bug. Hope all are doing well, especially those new to sobriety. It gets better.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Ky
Posts: 2,043
Grizzlybear I had a blast! I posted in the Sept class I can't remember the last time I had so much fun!
Layali, I'm glad you're keeping busy. Sounds like you're learning to fill your time. Be sure not to wear yourself out though. You still need to make sure you get enough rest too. I was reading about how you being lonely is a freighter for you. Me too! Good you're working through it. (Hug) good you're posting. I hope you're choosing to not drink to work for a better you. It's a positive thing. I have to work hard at it to find the positive side in everything. I was so used to being negetive all the time. Keep discovering the new you under that fog. You are in there! Good job!
Hey Wolf! Hope you had a good weekend too!
Layali, I'm glad you're keeping busy. Sounds like you're learning to fill your time. Be sure not to wear yourself out though. You still need to make sure you get enough rest too. I was reading about how you being lonely is a freighter for you. Me too! Good you're working through it. (Hug) good you're posting. I hope you're choosing to not drink to work for a better you. It's a positive thing. I have to work hard at it to find the positive side in everything. I was so used to being negetive all the time. Keep discovering the new you under that fog. You are in there! Good job!
Hey Wolf! Hope you had a good weekend too!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,837
Originally Posted by Jillybean31 
So I am sitting here eating a huge thing of popcorn with candy. why? Because I got in a huge fight with my husband and all I want to do is drink....UUUUUUgh. I am eating and playing the tape through...Lord help me.
Don't drink, you'll probably overdo it and lose it if you get drunk- at least that's what I do...
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 29
Jsbodhi- you are right- If I drink I will get drunk no doubt and tell him how I really feel lol . I am loving the sober feel so far but I think he may be having a hard time with it. He asked me if I could drink the rest of the alcohol in the house and then decide to stop because he didn't want me to waste it. really?
Thank you
Thank you
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,837
Originally Posted by Jillybean31
Jsbodhi- you are right- If I drink I will get drunk no doubt and tell him how I really feel lol . I am loving the sober feel so far but I think he may be having a hard time with it. He asked me if I could drink the rest of the alcohol in the house and then decide to stop because he didn't want me to waste it. really?
Thank you
Thank you
Does he have a problem with alcohol too?
Maybe just dump it out or ' donate' it to a neighbour
Last xmas my boyfriend knew I was trying to quit drinking, but didn't think my problem was that bad, plus it was xmas so he brought alcohol over thinking it was a ' special occasion', needless to say I got blackout drunk on wine, threw a drink in his face and kicked him out of my house over whatever my drunk mind made up.
He didn't do that again.......
We've been broken up for a while now
surprise surprise....
Member
Join Date: Oct 2015
Posts: 29
lol Sounds like a good call. My husband is the same in that he does not think my problem is that bad. Ive done a good job convincing him of that through the years I think.
He does not drink, only maybe once or twice a year. So I don't think he gets it
He does not drink, only maybe once or twice a year. So I don't think he gets it
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 1,134
Jillybean - I drank last night because of a huge fight with my daughter. I deeply regret it. It was a terrible way to handle it and all it did was prolong my misery. I've got to learn better coping mechanisms for these things like fights that are bound to happen. Good job to you for sticking with popcorn!
End of Day 1. Never, ever, ever again.
End of Day 1. Never, ever, ever again.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,837
Originally Posted by Juno11
Jillybean - I drank last night because of a huge fight with my daughter. I deeply regret it. It was a terrible way to handle it and all it did was prolong my misery. I've got to learn better coping mechanisms for these things like fights that are bound to happen. Good job to you for sticking with popcorn!
End of Day 1. Never, ever, ever again.
End of Day 1. Never, ever, ever again.
It feels like everything needs to be relearned, it's a wonderful journey though, even if it's hard.
I should be in every class since last nov, I've come so far though and I've learned so so much.
We can do this.
Xo
Professional zombie fighter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 341
Originally Posted by Jillybean31
lol Sounds like a good call. My husband is the same in that he does not think my problem is that bad. Ive done a good job convincing him of that through the years I think. He does not drink, only maybe once or twice a year. So I don't think he gets it
He thought my propensity for being wasted constantly was quirky. So did my friends.
He knew something was wrong, both with me and with the relationship, but he never thought it was that. If alcohol doesn't do much to you, I guess it's hard to understand how much it can **** some people up.
Professional zombie fighter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 341
So today I had my worst moment yet, by far, in these 22 days.
And when I say moment, I mean about four hours. I wanted it so bad, I was literally tasting beer in my mouth and feeling carbonation on the back of my throat.
I don't even know exactly why. On the one hand, I was at a condo with my extended family, and they were all drinking (terrible) beer, but on the other hand they were drinking all weekend and this is the first time I wanted some of it.
I just felt suddenly so sensitive. I read a news story that made me remember/realize for the first time that I'll owe the government $325 because I wasn't insured this year, and suddenly that fact seemed overwhelmingly, unreasonably terrible. I begged my sister to drive home with me, but she said we had to stay and hang with the family, and that seemed to me like being trapped on a damn desert island. My brain was, in other words, being ALL dramatic, and I wanted to make it go away with beer. None of it made real sense.
I read and posted a little on here, and thought through some things. Then I got a card game started and played some cards.
Then I felt so much better, it was like I'd been overtaken by a four-hour madness.
It's so scary. I feel vulnerable, like no matter how much armor I think I've put on against cravings, no matter how much I anticipate and plan and work, there will always be a ***** somewhere. It seems so likely that some day a craving will find the *****, hit the exact right combination weaknesses so that I'm left defenseless.
I'm just scared.
Wishful thinking: Maybe this happened because Friday, Saturday, and Sunday were all so thoroughly taken up by family activities that I haven't had time to do anything recovery-related in like 72 hours other than post on here. I've only been for like one run in that time, I've written nothing, I've read nothing other than SR, and I've accomplished nothing on any of my "fixing my messes" lists. So maybe that's why this happened. That would be nice to believe, because that's identifiable.
:/
Edited to add: I do know I shouldn't have been at a drinking condo, family or not. I didn't plan to be. My sister and I were supposed to go to the BEACH with family, then go home. But instead, day drinking.
And when I say moment, I mean about four hours. I wanted it so bad, I was literally tasting beer in my mouth and feeling carbonation on the back of my throat.
I don't even know exactly why. On the one hand, I was at a condo with my extended family, and they were all drinking (terrible) beer, but on the other hand they were drinking all weekend and this is the first time I wanted some of it.
I just felt suddenly so sensitive. I read a news story that made me remember/realize for the first time that I'll owe the government $325 because I wasn't insured this year, and suddenly that fact seemed overwhelmingly, unreasonably terrible. I begged my sister to drive home with me, but she said we had to stay and hang with the family, and that seemed to me like being trapped on a damn desert island. My brain was, in other words, being ALL dramatic, and I wanted to make it go away with beer. None of it made real sense.
I read and posted a little on here, and thought through some things. Then I got a card game started and played some cards.
Then I felt so much better, it was like I'd been overtaken by a four-hour madness.
It's so scary. I feel vulnerable, like no matter how much armor I think I've put on against cravings, no matter how much I anticipate and plan and work, there will always be a ***** somewhere. It seems so likely that some day a craving will find the *****, hit the exact right combination weaknesses so that I'm left defenseless.
I'm just scared.
Wishful thinking: Maybe this happened because Friday, Saturday, and Sunday were all so thoroughly taken up by family activities that I haven't had time to do anything recovery-related in like 72 hours other than post on here. I've only been for like one run in that time, I've written nothing, I've read nothing other than SR, and I've accomplished nothing on any of my "fixing my messes" lists. So maybe that's why this happened. That would be nice to believe, because that's identifiable.
:/
Edited to add: I do know I shouldn't have been at a drinking condo, family or not. I didn't plan to be. My sister and I were supposed to go to the BEACH with family, then go home. But instead, day drinking.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,465
being around a drinking environment is tough.
You kinda think that getting through one night gives you an alcoholism inoculation but you find a day or even a few days down the track the urge hits you hard again.
If you can;t leave - find a quiet spot, log on to SR and remember - this is a finite period of time - you can get through this
some great tips here too
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
D
You kinda think that getting through one night gives you an alcoholism inoculation but you find a day or even a few days down the track the urge hits you hard again.
If you can;t leave - find a quiet spot, log on to SR and remember - this is a finite period of time - you can get through this
some great tips here too
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...-cravings.html
D
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Ky
Posts: 2,043
I know some if you are having a tough time please hang in there. Do anything but drink. Learning to handle all these feelings without alcohol is tough but you can do it. Learn different coping skills for being upset, mad, sad, betrayed, happy, etc. I know you think a lot of things are wrong, but try to see what's going right! If you didn't drink that's a huge thing going right! All the little right moments go unrecognized but you need to see them. They add up and start making you, YOU again!
It's tough but you can do it! Fight for yourself!
It's tough but you can do it! Fight for yourself!
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