Gilmer

How are you doing, Courage?

courage2

Hey glee -- Good on you for posting about one of those not-so-proud moments in sobriety. You're not alone. Did the falling out with this clique happened when you were in pretty early recovery? Were any of the women aware of what was going on with you? If your bad experience with these women over the children and hockey is tied up with trust/mistrust about your drinking problem, I can easily imagine that would build into a pretty heavy resentment.

Yes! And don't neglect to bring to mind your own great qualities, among them fortitude, honesty, & intelligence.

I'm glad you got to a meeting and put into practice the idea of the moral inventory -- I don't do one as often as I should. Will you talk to your sponsor about it?

Hi Gilmer -- I'm ok, a bit stiff & sore, trying to stay out of my head. How are you?

FBL

Busy, busy, busy. Have a great day, all!

Gilmer

You all, too!

stargazer016

Busy here too!

Enjoy the day all!

Gilmer

I’m neither depressed nor jumping up and down. That’s probably a good place for me to be!

Gilmer

How are everyone else’s general spirits today?

gleefan

You all are really too kind. Thanks for your loving words. They mean a lot to me.

I've burned enough bridges that I don't consider my decency to be a given yet, although my confidence in myself is growing.

Carlos was the perfect person to Fifth Step this with. He called me last night and Ingot to share the nature of my wrongs with another person. He and I don't let each other off the hook, but we don't let the other unduly blame themselves. He agreed that simply living my life without seeking to further debate the subject is the right next step. If they engage, I can choose not to be triggered. I can simply change the subject, deflect, and move on.

He didn't bring up a good point. He asked me to consider why I get so triggered and angry. I think it's from my step mother mistreating me when I was young, but he's right that it's good food for thought. I would like to reach a point where I can observe my feelings rather than clean up after bad actions.

Courage - Were you hurt? Why are you sore? Whatever the cause I hope you are feeling better! You are so nurturing to all of us. I am sending you virtual chicken soup and a snuggly blanket. Ultimate autumn comfort!

Gilmer - It sounds like you've had some enjoyable days recently. Middle of the road is a very good place to be.

Site - Glad your schedule will be slowing down. Enjoy the rest!

Dee - Thanks for the encouragement. I appreciate you!

Fbl - Nice to hear of Fran's recent improvement. I thought of you on Tom Petty's passing, both because of your fondness for pop culture and your passion for music. "American Girl" is one of my all time favorite tunes. I love its energy. The movie reference I make with it is Fast Times at Ridgemont High, though, not Silence of the Lambs.

Have a good day everyone!

courage2

Hey Glee, I'm glad you & Carlos had a good talk. Re understanding why you were so triggered, I'm sure "more will be revealed." As your sober time gets longer & longer!

I didn't hurt myself -- my aches & pains just flare up when I'm clenched up in front of a computer for long hours. I'm working on a paper that's giving me the pip. Thanks for asking!

FBL

Glee, you seem like a good person. That's good enough for me.

Just wanted to say that I'm so glad I'm sober today!

JL2014

Schedule change
4 12 hr days starting tomorrow
Bad dreams gettin worse. May be eating late, may be ptsd.
Gonna try skipping last meal

courage2

JL, Long hours plus early recovery sounds like a good recipe for bad dreams. Take it a little at a time and grab every chance you can get to hydrate and chill. Are you going to bed worried?

I hope all are well. Sober on!

Gilmer

Yes, JL. Please take care of yourself as well as you can.

courage2

I'm listening to Bob Dylan's sessions recordings from the mid-60s, Blonde On Blonde era. The songs are almost all so familiar but the little differences in the session recordings make them new. Another source of joy that being sober made possible.

site1Q84

I'm with you on that! I was going to point out how quickly you realized what you did in that situation. I like to think the faster I realize why I react the way I do, the closer I am getting to thinking things through BEFORE I react haha

Some day we'll get there!

JL, courage, - I hope you're both feeling better today!

Hi everyone!

JL2014

Think I'm gonna use a sick day and goto a meeting, then fool around. Or just sleep.
I know what we used to use sick days for- HANGOVERS. Maybe it's time to relax a day. On weekends I do everything w the kids ( which I love) but there's no break.

FBL

Love me some Dylan, too! He's a fellow Minnesotan, though he left a LONG time ago. Saw him in concert back in the late 1980s. Not a real great experience. He changed the songs so much, some of them were unrecognizable. Would much rather listen to the records.

courage2

Absolutely, do. Early recovery is hard on the body and mind. Honor the need for rest and revitalization.

stargazer016

I saw Dylan the first time in 1981. It was the first concert that I paid TEN dollars to see! (I still have that ticket!) Half the show was him doing his old tunes, the other half was him performing the Christian songs that he was penning at the time. I saw him in the late 80's and he raced through his greatest hits in a 55 minute show. I said that I would never pay to see him again and I haven't. But his musical legacy is immense, and timeless.

I've been working well into the AM each night all week and not had much time on the internet. I hope all are doing ok.

Enjoy the day!

JL2014

Went to a meeting this morning. Someone brought in a relapser . Everyone decided to turn the talk, off the subject and on to a first step meeting. I'm in a lot of pain, but when I shared I let it hang out ! The cowardly suicidal ( bs), full of fear, wreck of a human being. Guy started talking and crying right afterward.
I feel like crap, from from pain, but today I feel better that maybe I was open to help somebody a bit. On to the next 3 days, in the morning.