The Power Of Sobriety Thread (POST!) #3
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I just got back from some friends’ house. The lady’s from Ecuador, and she made the most delicious Ecuadorian dinner with a specially-seasoned pork roast; tortillas de papas, which is the equivalent of potato pancakes with a special kind of cheese; hominy; homemade plantain chips; a hot sauce called ahi, normal green beans, and a tomato and cilantro mixture with special seasoning (everyone else’s had onions, but the hostess graciously left mine out).
Then we all had a great conversation afterward.
It was a terrific evening!
Then we all had a great conversation afterward.
It was a terrific evening!
My brother in law and I were talking about Tom Petty being always on the radio all the time while growing up. Petty started out while I was in my high school years and kept rocking to the end. It seems as if the titans of my youth are falling fast these days.
Beautiful day in Philly today. Did a five mile walk in a park in the morning, then did an invigorating bike ride in the afternoon. Even managed to get shopping and laundry done in between. It amazes me how much I can do in a day not drinking.
Pleasant dreams all!
Beautiful day in Philly today. Did a five mile walk in a park in the morning, then did an invigorating bike ride in the afternoon. Even managed to get shopping and laundry done in between. It amazes me how much I can do in a day not drinking.
Pleasant dreams all!
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
I’m sorry about Tom Petty, too. I was a fan.
It’s been a really rotten couple of days in the world, hasn’t it?
I finally watched Angelina Jolie’s movie First They Killed My Father.. I liked it. It was beautifully filmed, and the little girl who played the lead character was absolutely outstanding. It moved kind of slow and didn’t have a plot, per se—it was more of one family’s reaction to the takeover by the Khmer Rouge. They went from a life of loveliness to a life of stark ugliness.
The movie ended on a note of beauty and hope.
I definitely recommend it (if you enjoy simply watching things unfold).
It’s been a really rotten couple of days in the world, hasn’t it?
I finally watched Angelina Jolie’s movie First They Killed My Father.. I liked it. It was beautifully filmed, and the little girl who played the lead character was absolutely outstanding. It moved kind of slow and didn’t have a plot, per se—it was more of one family’s reaction to the takeover by the Khmer Rouge. They went from a life of loveliness to a life of stark ugliness.
The movie ended on a note of beauty and hope.
I definitely recommend it (if you enjoy simply watching things unfold).
((Gilmer)) I'm so sorry!
It's been a crazy, busy week for me, which isn't a bad thing. I've been traveling a lot for work this year, and this is my last trip so I'm pretty excited to get home and get some time off. Two more weeks and I'm off - so anything to make the time go faster is good! I love my job but I'm ready for a break. Things are slowing down for this last little bit, so I'll be around more.
I hope everyone is doing well!
Sorry to hear about Tom Petty - I didn't know until I checked this thread, but I've always been a fan.
It's been a crazy, busy week for me, which isn't a bad thing. I've been traveling a lot for work this year, and this is my last trip so I'm pretty excited to get home and get some time off. Two more weeks and I'm off - so anything to make the time go faster is good! I love my job but I'm ready for a break. Things are slowing down for this last little bit, so I'll be around more.
I hope everyone is doing well!
Sorry to hear about Tom Petty - I didn't know until I checked this thread, but I've always been a fan.
Tom Petty was a HUGE part of the soundtrack of my life (and so many others). First heard "Breakdown" in early 1978 and became an immediate fan. He followed his heart, stuck to his guns and found enormous success. He packed a lot of living into those 66 years. We should all be so lucky.
Have a great day, all!
Have a great day, all!
Perfectly put, FBL. I wasn't a fan, but you didn't need to be -- some of his songs are practically American anthems.
Yes it has. Or couple of weeks -- many people I know in NYC have family in Puerto Rico and even basic communication is still hard.
((Gilmer)) I hope your grief is lightened by many happy memories.
Yes it has. Or couple of weeks -- many people I know in NYC have family in Puerto Rico and even basic communication is still hard.
((Gilmer)) I hope your grief is lightened by many happy memories.
Hello everyone
I finally made it to a meeting last night. I've been busy on Mondays, my home group night, and complacent Tuesdays - Sundays. I feel it too. I need reminders how and why to cast aside my ego and let my hp in.
When I'm under a bit of pressure, without proper guidance and contact with other alcoholics looking to live right, I get all askew. Like it says in Step 5, pointing out others' sins doesn't relieve my suffering.
So the other night when a hockey mom made her way to my driveway while out waking her dog, I attacked like a venomous snake.
I didn't feel good afterwards, but I didn't fully know where my self destructive anger came from. I have by all accounts a charmed life. I took a little time to think about the pressure that's been building with that situation. A couple years ago, a kid was bothering mine, and the coaches and displinary group didn't address it, so I had to address it with the parent. The parent was super defensive and refused to talk to me - or my friends. Well my friends wanted none of that and they stopped including me.
The woman in my driveway was part of that group and there she stood at my driveway, on Sunday, probing us for info on that kid's behavior and asking us to go to the Board with our concerns.
She's a bored woman looking to stir up the pot. I said something along the lines of how last time I was left to my own devices to handle it, and that sure ended with nothing but negativity for me.
Then, I let loose: how's your team? I argued about how her little clique's nasty little ringleader bribed the coach with being included in social activities by forcing certain kids be on that team. When she argued with me how that wasn't true, I just dug in deeper and listed examples..... It was a reach, based on my suspicions not fact, and not my best moment. And even if all of it is true, pointing out others sins didn't relieve my suffering.
I didn't realize I was suffering, but looking back with 20/20 hindsight, there were signs that the pressure was building and signs that my ego and fear were running the show.
In the end, the group that cast me aside will still cast me aside. I'm disappointed in myself for providing them good reason to; before I was the victim of mean girls, now they are.
My husband still golfs with their husbands. When they get together after golf or on the weekends they stopped inviting him/us. I want to beat myself up over what I said because of the effects it may have on him/golf, but at the same time I want to shake him for minimizing how upsetting it was for me to be completely cut off.
I don't have these problems in other facets of my life. Maybe it's because these friendships were formed in active addiction? I know I am more capable of healthy relationships now than I used to be, and I have a lot of good relationships to prove it.
So I'm very meh about how I've behaved and what I've said.
I acknowledge that my kid is on a team with several kids with a history of difficult behavioral problems. Their parents are obnoxious too. It makes for a stress of wondering when the other shoe is going to drop.
The woman in my driveway knows I find it difficult and disappointing. She was using me to create drama. She knows my triggers and played them like a fiddle.
I can pray for her. I do not have to scowl or be angry over what has happened anymore.
I can focus on what I have: a full, robust, wonderful life with great kids, good friends, an interesting job.
I can walk into that rink with gratitude for all I have and all I've learned in life over the eight plus years I've been going there (three and a half of them sober).
I finally made it to a meeting last night. I've been busy on Mondays, my home group night, and complacent Tuesdays - Sundays. I feel it too. I need reminders how and why to cast aside my ego and let my hp in.
When I'm under a bit of pressure, without proper guidance and contact with other alcoholics looking to live right, I get all askew. Like it says in Step 5, pointing out others' sins doesn't relieve my suffering.
So the other night when a hockey mom made her way to my driveway while out waking her dog, I attacked like a venomous snake.
I didn't feel good afterwards, but I didn't fully know where my self destructive anger came from. I have by all accounts a charmed life. I took a little time to think about the pressure that's been building with that situation. A couple years ago, a kid was bothering mine, and the coaches and displinary group didn't address it, so I had to address it with the parent. The parent was super defensive and refused to talk to me - or my friends. Well my friends wanted none of that and they stopped including me.
The woman in my driveway was part of that group and there she stood at my driveway, on Sunday, probing us for info on that kid's behavior and asking us to go to the Board with our concerns.
She's a bored woman looking to stir up the pot. I said something along the lines of how last time I was left to my own devices to handle it, and that sure ended with nothing but negativity for me.
Then, I let loose: how's your team? I argued about how her little clique's nasty little ringleader bribed the coach with being included in social activities by forcing certain kids be on that team. When she argued with me how that wasn't true, I just dug in deeper and listed examples..... It was a reach, based on my suspicions not fact, and not my best moment. And even if all of it is true, pointing out others sins didn't relieve my suffering.
I didn't realize I was suffering, but looking back with 20/20 hindsight, there were signs that the pressure was building and signs that my ego and fear were running the show.
In the end, the group that cast me aside will still cast me aside. I'm disappointed in myself for providing them good reason to; before I was the victim of mean girls, now they are.
My husband still golfs with their husbands. When they get together after golf or on the weekends they stopped inviting him/us. I want to beat myself up over what I said because of the effects it may have on him/golf, but at the same time I want to shake him for minimizing how upsetting it was for me to be completely cut off.
I don't have these problems in other facets of my life. Maybe it's because these friendships were formed in active addiction? I know I am more capable of healthy relationships now than I used to be, and I have a lot of good relationships to prove it.
So I'm very meh about how I've behaved and what I've said.
I acknowledge that my kid is on a team with several kids with a history of difficult behavioral problems. Their parents are obnoxious too. It makes for a stress of wondering when the other shoe is going to drop.
The woman in my driveway knows I find it difficult and disappointing. She was using me to create drama. She knows my triggers and played them like a fiddle.
I can pray for her. I do not have to scowl or be angry over what has happened anymore.
I can focus on what I have: a full, robust, wonderful life with great kids, good friends, an interesting job.
I can walk into that rink with gratitude for all I have and all I've learned in life over the eight plus years I've been going there (three and a half of them sober).
the power of being sober.... here's a good reason why you should..
https://youtu.be/guKoNCQFAFk
https://youtu.be/guKoNCQFAFk
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