Class of February 2017 Support Thread Part 5
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,474
There;ll be support all across the weekend axe - maybe even heck out the weekender thread in the main forum?
Canguy - you sound like you're disappearing down the rabbit hole again - are you ok?
D
Canguy - you sound like you're disappearing down the rabbit hole again - are you ok?
D
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Go Axe! Me too. I've had a decent day. I cleaned up the wrappers and trash and receipts and junk I've been tossing on the floor of my 2 rooms here. Helped my dad clean out the fridge. Went to my sister's and did laundry, and showered up. Hey it's not some big day, but it's better than it always was.
Canguy I hear ya about Japan. My family members go to Osaka and it's like nothing ever happened there, it's a beautiful city. You'd never know it was utterly decimated and radioactive. The Japanese are definitely our friends now. I like them. I wish I'd gone when my brother lived there. My nephew has 1 year of college left and I'm 99% positive he'll simply leave for Japan. He holds dual citizenship. The Japanese love him because he's American. I would go if I were him. He's returning from a year there in July. Honestly, it's just a better run country than the US. Of course there is the hard work and drinking but my nephew doesn't drink. Never did.
Oh GEEZ. My sick friend is returning from the Mid West hospital she was at. She's more desperate than ever. Not cool man, I'm going to have to flee the State of country. I can't take it.
We have a nice hard rain here tonight. I'll be opening the windows to listen to it. It's about 68 degrees. Perfect temp for sleeping and I'll go to bed sober and wake sober.
Meds seem to help so far. Summer helps a lot more.
Viper out!
Canguy I hear ya about Japan. My family members go to Osaka and it's like nothing ever happened there, it's a beautiful city. You'd never know it was utterly decimated and radioactive. The Japanese are definitely our friends now. I like them. I wish I'd gone when my brother lived there. My nephew has 1 year of college left and I'm 99% positive he'll simply leave for Japan. He holds dual citizenship. The Japanese love him because he's American. I would go if I were him. He's returning from a year there in July. Honestly, it's just a better run country than the US. Of course there is the hard work and drinking but my nephew doesn't drink. Never did.
Oh GEEZ. My sick friend is returning from the Mid West hospital she was at. She's more desperate than ever. Not cool man, I'm going to have to flee the State of country. I can't take it.
We have a nice hard rain here tonight. I'll be opening the windows to listen to it. It's about 68 degrees. Perfect temp for sleeping and I'll go to bed sober and wake sober.
Meds seem to help so far. Summer helps a lot more.
Viper out!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
I woke groggy at about 9 and drifted in and out of sleep for a bit. But I'm going now. I need something going on at 5pm.
I'm going out with my brother to LL Bean and to look at a motorcycle for him.
Talk later. Maybe 4pm.
V
I'm going out with my brother to LL Bean and to look at a motorcycle for him.
Talk later. Maybe 4pm.
V
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
I came very close last night, but gave in at the 11th hour. I am going to get help. I can't do this on willpower alone unfortunately.
I just have to surrender and admit I have a major problem and I can't drink ever again.
I just have to surrender and admit I have a major problem and I can't drink ever again.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2017
Posts: 252
Hi axeman,
Please don't take offense by what I am about to say----no offense intended. I kept some of my thoughts to myself, regarding something that you posted a couple of weeks ago, and now I am going to say them.
On page 11 of this thread (on 6/6/17) you wrote:
I was going to respond to that at the time and say that obviously you have a problem, because you keep relapsing---you are addicted to alcohol---- and yet you are not admitting to yourself the seriousness of the problem.
The reason I did not write that at the time is because I thought that we each have to come to that on our own, so it is not up to me to tell you that .
For many years I told myself that I must not really have a problem because I could stop for a couple of days. But as we all know, our problem keeps getting worse as time passes. When it started to cause medical problems for me ( my blood pressure was starting to go up, GI issues, uncontrollable anxiety), the seriousness of the problem hit me.
I KNOW that I have a problem----I am addicted to alcohol.
There is only one solution ----- to never drink alcohol again for the rest of my life.
Please don't take offense by what I am about to say----no offense intended. I kept some of my thoughts to myself, regarding something that you posted a couple of weeks ago, and now I am going to say them.
On page 11 of this thread (on 6/6/17) you wrote:
I am worrying about myself. Class of Feb but I'm not sober. Joined SR in 15 but I'm not sober.
I need to change my attitude and/or perspective.
I've had moments where I have started to admit I'm an alcoholic but they haven't lasted
and I haven't taken longer term actions as such.
I need to change my attitude and/or perspective.
I've had moments where I have started to admit I'm an alcoholic but they haven't lasted
and I haven't taken longer term actions as such.
The reason I did not write that at the time is because I thought that we each have to come to that on our own, so it is not up to me to tell you that .
For many years I told myself that I must not really have a problem because I could stop for a couple of days. But as we all know, our problem keeps getting worse as time passes. When it started to cause medical problems for me ( my blood pressure was starting to go up, GI issues, uncontrollable anxiety), the seriousness of the problem hit me.
I KNOW that I have a problem----I am addicted to alcohol.
There is only one solution ----- to never drink alcohol again for the rest of my life.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,474
Maybe the solutions not trying harder Axe but doing things differently.
I tried really hard not to drink but I kept drinking cos that was the only string on my bow.
Maybe you need to find some real life support - AA or some other recovery group, or a doctor or counsellor, outpatient rehab?
I had to take drinking off the table as a viable option - no matter what - for for good.
I had to learn to short circuit that decision to drink and understand I had the power to come here, or somewhere in the real world, to be talked out of it instead.
It wasn't much fun at the time but I'm incredible grateful for that now.
I believe you can do this axe - but use both hands - it's not much good fighting with one hand behind your back.
Go hard as they say.
D
I tried really hard not to drink but I kept drinking cos that was the only string on my bow.
Maybe you need to find some real life support - AA or some other recovery group, or a doctor or counsellor, outpatient rehab?
I had to take drinking off the table as a viable option - no matter what - for for good.
I had to learn to short circuit that decision to drink and understand I had the power to come here, or somewhere in the real world, to be talked out of it instead.
It wasn't much fun at the time but I'm incredible grateful for that now.
I believe you can do this axe - but use both hands - it's not much good fighting with one hand behind your back.
Go hard as they say.
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 588
Ah I just wrote a long one and lost it!
I called a treatment place hotline today. I spoke to an inpatient nurse. I need to call the specific facility number tomorrow for outpatient questions. I am going to.
I am also going to meet with my psychologist this week in the interim. Why not?
I agreed to spend the weekend at my parents for a change of scenery, some support, and accountability.
I also asked my wife to "tell on me" and call my parents if I show up with alcohol. No more of it in our house.
I am not done trying. In fact, I'm ready to try way harder and act sooner. No more excuses or procrastination. Gotta get my life back.
I called a treatment place hotline today. I spoke to an inpatient nurse. I need to call the specific facility number tomorrow for outpatient questions. I am going to.
I am also going to meet with my psychologist this week in the interim. Why not?
I agreed to spend the weekend at my parents for a change of scenery, some support, and accountability.
I also asked my wife to "tell on me" and call my parents if I show up with alcohol. No more of it in our house.
I am not done trying. In fact, I'm ready to try way harder and act sooner. No more excuses or procrastination. Gotta get my life back.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Axe I've bee in a similar spot. I've known darn well I have a problem for years. I'm hurting today. Not good.
Somebody point me to the 'Plan' link again. I'm scoping out AA for tomorrow.
My friend came back from the hospital. She was begging me to pick her up and go up to her place with her. She's terrified. Last night I had to tell her NO. I also ignored texts last night. Today she called twice and I did not answer. She's sick, alone, broke, terrified and the apartment is a hazard. She's probably crying in the dark right now. She cries so much she gets 'black eyes' from all the rubbing. Bruises. She's been my best friend for 7-8 years now and the most special person I've ever met. I'm totally tossing her off. This really is brutal folks. I'm going to do my best to keep this up and hope this gets easier. It hurts bad.
She could very well end up in a 'home' and there is no good Home unless you are very wealthy. She went from vibrant, with depression issues, to absolutely unable to care for herself. Her brain and body just aren't working. Too bad her parents are such scum. They really are. She did nothing wrong, they are simply selfish.
Well, wish me luck.
-V
Somebody point me to the 'Plan' link again. I'm scoping out AA for tomorrow.
My friend came back from the hospital. She was begging me to pick her up and go up to her place with her. She's terrified. Last night I had to tell her NO. I also ignored texts last night. Today she called twice and I did not answer. She's sick, alone, broke, terrified and the apartment is a hazard. She's probably crying in the dark right now. She cries so much she gets 'black eyes' from all the rubbing. Bruises. She's been my best friend for 7-8 years now and the most special person I've ever met. I'm totally tossing her off. This really is brutal folks. I'm going to do my best to keep this up and hope this gets easier. It hurts bad.
She could very well end up in a 'home' and there is no good Home unless you are very wealthy. She went from vibrant, with depression issues, to absolutely unable to care for herself. Her brain and body just aren't working. Too bad her parents are such scum. They really are. She did nothing wrong, they are simply selfish.
Well, wish me luck.
-V
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,474
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Axe, do it. That's cool. It can't hurt and you'll probably meet a bunch of folks just like youself in there.
I really, really need help today. I'm really heartsick because I'm breaking it off with my friend and I'm SO worried about her. My heart literally hurts. It's awful.
The arguments are that 'I can't save her, this will never let up, and it's a full time job to help her out. I need to work that full time job for me.' However, I don't think people should be disposed of in the gutter, and that this is a monumental failure by the system and her parents. Like I've said, she's ALONE. Just terrible. I feel terrible.
Still feel like #%^* from the other night. Meetings are all early morning or late evening. I'm just too tired to make it tonight.
V
I really, really need help today. I'm really heartsick because I'm breaking it off with my friend and I'm SO worried about her. My heart literally hurts. It's awful.
The arguments are that 'I can't save her, this will never let up, and it's a full time job to help her out. I need to work that full time job for me.' However, I don't think people should be disposed of in the gutter, and that this is a monumental failure by the system and her parents. Like I've said, she's ALONE. Just terrible. I feel terrible.
Still feel like #%^* from the other night. Meetings are all early morning or late evening. I'm just too tired to make it tonight.
V
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