Class of April 2015 Part 11
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,189
Inc, have you come clean with your fiancé about this? It would be good to have her in your corner.
Dee's bringing up an early post of yours really hit home. You need to find that spirit and determination once again to beat back the beast.
Dee's bringing up an early post of yours really hit home. You need to find that spirit and determination once again to beat back the beast.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 691
Good morning! Glad to see support rallying around Inc this morning.
I am in a very good place right now. I think it's coming from a combination of things, mostly making a conscious effort to just be better every day. I'm participating in a facebook group game, or challenge, or what ever you want to call it, but its making sure to post everyday what I do each for my Mind, Body, Spirit, Soul and Wealth. I'm also continuing on with the practices that were introduced to me at my weekend event.
Keep on keeping on. This part of recovery is brutal sometimes, but it's also so peaceful just becoming our true selves.
I posted about my sober lifestyle on my instagram account and it just felt like a weight was lifted. I can't bury the past, it's part of me, and why hide it! At my event, in passing I thanked one of the featured speakers for her lovely share about living an authentic life and she shocked me by telling me my instagram post resonated with her. Being the sensitive type, I burst into tears. I had no idea she read it, and I love that I am attracting people of her caliber to me! We are more then social media buddies now.
It just makes me happy that I can help people understand that they don't need to be in the state of unhappiness they find themselves in in the grips of addiction.
<3
I am in a very good place right now. I think it's coming from a combination of things, mostly making a conscious effort to just be better every day. I'm participating in a facebook group game, or challenge, or what ever you want to call it, but its making sure to post everyday what I do each for my Mind, Body, Spirit, Soul and Wealth. I'm also continuing on with the practices that were introduced to me at my weekend event.
Keep on keeping on. This part of recovery is brutal sometimes, but it's also so peaceful just becoming our true selves.
I posted about my sober lifestyle on my instagram account and it just felt like a weight was lifted. I can't bury the past, it's part of me, and why hide it! At my event, in passing I thanked one of the featured speakers for her lovely share about living an authentic life and she shocked me by telling me my instagram post resonated with her. Being the sensitive type, I burst into tears. I had no idea she read it, and I love that I am attracting people of her caliber to me! We are more then social media buddies now.
It just makes me happy that I can help people understand that they don't need to be in the state of unhappiness they find themselves in in the grips of addiction.
<3
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,189
Originally Posted by Cauliflower 
Good morning! Glad to see support rallying around Inc this morning.
I am in a very good place right now. I think it's coming from a combination of things, mostly making a conscious effort to just be better every day. I'm participating in a facebook group game, or challenge, or what ever you want to call it, but its making sure to post everyday what I do each for my Mind, Body, Spirit, Soul and Wealth. I'm also continuing on with the practices that were introduced to me at my weekend event.
Keep on keeping on. This part of recovery is brutal sometimes, but it's also so peaceful just becoming our true selves.
I posted about my sober lifestyle on my instagram account and it just felt like a weight was lifted. I can't bury the past, it's part of me, and why hide it! At my event, in passing I thanked one of the featured speakers for her lovely share about living an authentic life and she shocked me by telling me my instagram post resonated with her. Being the sensitive type, I burst into tears. I had no idea she read it, and I love that I am attracting people of her caliber to me! We are more then social media buddies now.
It just makes me happy that I can help people understand that they don't need to be in the state of unhappiness they find themselves in in the grips of addiction.
<3
I am in a very good place right now. I think it's coming from a combination of things, mostly making a conscious effort to just be better every day. I'm participating in a facebook group game, or challenge, or what ever you want to call it, but its making sure to post everyday what I do each for my Mind, Body, Spirit, Soul and Wealth. I'm also continuing on with the practices that were introduced to me at my weekend event.
Keep on keeping on. This part of recovery is brutal sometimes, but it's also so peaceful just becoming our true selves.
I posted about my sober lifestyle on my instagram account and it just felt like a weight was lifted. I can't bury the past, it's part of me, and why hide it! At my event, in passing I thanked one of the featured speakers for her lovely share about living an authentic life and she shocked me by telling me my instagram post resonated with her. Being the sensitive type, I burst into tears. I had no idea she read it, and I love that I am attracting people of her caliber to me! We are more then social media buddies now.
It just makes me happy that I can help people understand that they don't need to be in the state of unhappiness they find themselves in in the grips of addiction.
<3
Hope you are making some small strides Inc!
Have a great weekend all!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
Originally Posted by stargazer016
Inc, have you come clean with your fiancé about this? It would be good to have her in your corner.
Dee's bringing up an early post of yours really hit home. You need to find that spirit and determination once again to beat back the beast.
Dee's bringing up an early post of yours really hit home. You need to find that spirit and determination once again to beat back the beast.
Im not concerned over how it will go. She fully understands its a process. Maybe she's an enabler. IDK. Bit her mom and Dad were alcoholics. Mom recovered and did the 180 lifestyle change. Dad fell in a Wendy's parking lot and died from head trauma. He was drunk.
I know she won't jump for joy. But I know she will appreciate the truth to a great deal.
I'm looking forward to it.
Thank you all for provided a safe place.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
I chickened out.
With so much going on right now, she's pretty stressed.
I received a letter from an insurance company that I filed bankruptcy on that they are going to chase down my cosigner. Forgot I did that. My brother cosigned when I started selling insurance. I owe them $4,700. Opened this letter on the day I was to talk to her.
That's a lot of pressure for both of us.
I'm finding myself wanting to fall into the avoidance phase again. I know the stress that builds from that is sickening though.
My goal is to talk to my bankruptcy lawyer for suggestions, talk to the insurance company about options, and advise my brother.
Stressful. But I know the stress will be gone once I attack it. So that's my goal.
I'll keep you advised.
As far as fiance goes... I'll have to park that one. There's never a good time. I get that. But I just don't have it in me to dump a huge pile of crap on her like that ATM.
With so much going on right now, she's pretty stressed.
I received a letter from an insurance company that I filed bankruptcy on that they are going to chase down my cosigner. Forgot I did that. My brother cosigned when I started selling insurance. I owe them $4,700. Opened this letter on the day I was to talk to her.
That's a lot of pressure for both of us.
I'm finding myself wanting to fall into the avoidance phase again. I know the stress that builds from that is sickening though.
My goal is to talk to my bankruptcy lawyer for suggestions, talk to the insurance company about options, and advise my brother.
Stressful. But I know the stress will be gone once I attack it. So that's my goal.
I'll keep you advised.
As far as fiance goes... I'll have to park that one. There's never a good time. I get that. But I just don't have it in me to dump a huge pile of crap on her like that ATM.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Originally Posted by Incontrol15
I chickened out.
With so much going on right now, she's pretty stressed.
I received a letter from an insurance company that I filed bankruptcy on that they are going to chase down my cosigner. Forgot I did that. My brother cosigned when I started selling insurance. I owe them $4,700. Opened this letter on the day I was to talk to her.
That's a lot of pressure for both of us.
I'm finding myself wanting to fall into the avoidance phase again. I know the stress that builds from that is sickening though.
My goal is to talk to my bankruptcy lawyer for suggestions, talk to the insurance company about options, and advise my brother.
Stressful. But I know the stress will be gone once I attack it. So that's my goal.
I'll keep you advised.
As far as fiance goes... I'll have to park that one. There's never a good time. I get that. But I just don't have it in me to dump a huge pile of crap on her like that ATM.
With so much going on right now, she's pretty stressed.
I received a letter from an insurance company that I filed bankruptcy on that they are going to chase down my cosigner. Forgot I did that. My brother cosigned when I started selling insurance. I owe them $4,700. Opened this letter on the day I was to talk to her.
That's a lot of pressure for both of us.
I'm finding myself wanting to fall into the avoidance phase again. I know the stress that builds from that is sickening though.
My goal is to talk to my bankruptcy lawyer for suggestions, talk to the insurance company about options, and advise my brother.
Stressful. But I know the stress will be gone once I attack it. So that's my goal.
I'll keep you advised.
As far as fiance goes... I'll have to park that one. There's never a good time. I get that. But I just don't have it in me to dump a huge pile of crap on her like that ATM.
Rooting for you!
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,473
Yeah, there's never a good time to quit IC.
The same goes for telling loved ones the truth.
The longer you put it off tho, the harder it's going to be, and in the case of loved ones, the hurt may be greater?
Are you committed to the taper still?
D
The same goes for telling loved ones the truth.
The longer you put it off tho, the harder it's going to be, and in the case of loved ones, the hurt may be greater?
Are you committed to the taper still?
D
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,189
This is a dangerous spot for you Inc. You have energized your AV once again. You are making promises to yourself that you will take care of things down the road. You are promising to come clean with your finance when the time is right.
I promised myself time and time again that I would get it together and start solving my problems. I told myself that I would involve my wife with my drinking problem. I was always going to do these things tomorrow, or next week, or whenever. In the meantime, I drank and hard. Once I started drinking each day, nothing was going to get done and nothing was going to get better. I lived for that 15 minutes of peace that alcohol afforded me each day. Your post sounds like I could have written it in March 2015.
The difference, and it is huge, is now you know how much better things can be not drinking and using. You have seen the vision of a better future. Don't let you and your life get stuck again in addictive thinking. We are all nearing the 600 day mark. We have all worked extremely hard to get to this point. Please don't let your AV get control of your thinking and your life again.
You can do this Inc!
You are In Control!
I promised myself time and time again that I would get it together and start solving my problems. I told myself that I would involve my wife with my drinking problem. I was always going to do these things tomorrow, or next week, or whenever. In the meantime, I drank and hard. Once I started drinking each day, nothing was going to get done and nothing was going to get better. I lived for that 15 minutes of peace that alcohol afforded me each day. Your post sounds like I could have written it in March 2015.
The difference, and it is huge, is now you know how much better things can be not drinking and using. You have seen the vision of a better future. Don't let you and your life get stuck again in addictive thinking. We are all nearing the 600 day mark. We have all worked extremely hard to get to this point. Please don't let your AV get control of your thinking and your life again.
You can do this Inc!
You are In Control!
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,189
Took my kids out to a well known public garden last night that featured hundreds of lighted trees outside as well as a fully decorated conservatory. It was such a fun time enjoying some holiday spirit with my children. I was thinking last night that I could never do something like this when drinking because I never was in a condition to drive after 5:00. I know I missed so much with my kids and now I am trying to make the time creating lasting positive memories with them.
Have a great day all!
Have a great day all!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
Thank you for the support. My taper is going good. Took a big jump today. I'm starting to push the envelope on withdrawal symptoms. I feel I'm close to being able to jump off.
And I hear you loud and clear on putting things off. There never is a good time. And keeping this to myself is not helping.
As for the other pressing issue.... Namely an insurance company going after my Brother for the $4700 I owe, my first step is to discuss with my lawyer for advice. I had a phone appointment scheduled with him yesterday, but I was not able to take the call because my boss was having a conversation with me. He was busy when I attempted a call back.
Tonight I will send an email describing the situation. I really don't think there's much he can do, but any advice at all would be helpful.
Money has been bleeding big time lately too with car repairs and dental work. Today we learned the kids car transmission is slipping.
All of these events would have me spiraling out of control. I'm holding it together ATM. Attacking the addiction, car issues, dental work, and money I owe. And accepting the things I cannot control like bleeding money.
My confidence is high. I believe in myself as much as you guys do. Kratom is no longer effecting me emotionally. Or at least on a level I can feel. It's purely there for withdrawal prevention. I've been able to drop 10% every couple days.
I suspect kratom will be done next week and money will stop bleeding by the end of this month.
I did want to bring up the face to face suggestion. I do want to do something there. I think starting with therapy for sure. I need to learn to forgive myself and address the underlining depression that pops up once in a while.
My goal is to set appointments for January. Now that I have insurance, I can use a normal shrink instead of one that works with low income. I'm doing some shopping for a couple options.
And I hear you loud and clear on putting things off. There never is a good time. And keeping this to myself is not helping.
As for the other pressing issue.... Namely an insurance company going after my Brother for the $4700 I owe, my first step is to discuss with my lawyer for advice. I had a phone appointment scheduled with him yesterday, but I was not able to take the call because my boss was having a conversation with me. He was busy when I attempted a call back.
Tonight I will send an email describing the situation. I really don't think there's much he can do, but any advice at all would be helpful.
Money has been bleeding big time lately too with car repairs and dental work. Today we learned the kids car transmission is slipping.
All of these events would have me spiraling out of control. I'm holding it together ATM. Attacking the addiction, car issues, dental work, and money I owe. And accepting the things I cannot control like bleeding money.
My confidence is high. I believe in myself as much as you guys do. Kratom is no longer effecting me emotionally. Or at least on a level I can feel. It's purely there for withdrawal prevention. I've been able to drop 10% every couple days.
I suspect kratom will be done next week and money will stop bleeding by the end of this month.
I did want to bring up the face to face suggestion. I do want to do something there. I think starting with therapy for sure. I need to learn to forgive myself and address the underlining depression that pops up once in a while.
My goal is to set appointments for January. Now that I have insurance, I can use a normal shrink instead of one that works with low income. I'm doing some shopping for a couple options.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Hey SG! Family time is certainly a massive plus that comes from ditching addiction. I was always kind of avoiding my family. Didn't want to be caught out. It is amazing now I can embrace them!
Inc. Glad the tapering is going well. I think you'll feel much more in control of the situation when you free yourself of your habit. Hopefully you can negotiate with the company you owe to and work out a repayment plan. Mostly there are options in these situations when there is good will on the part of the debtor.
Anyway, hope you all have a great weekend.
All the best!
Inc. Glad the tapering is going well. I think you'll feel much more in control of the situation when you free yourself of your habit. Hopefully you can negotiate with the company you owe to and work out a repayment plan. Mostly there are options in these situations when there is good will on the part of the debtor.
Anyway, hope you all have a great weekend.
All the best!
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,189
Glad to see that the taper is progressing Inc!
I agree with Amp that the insurance company will likely be somewhat flexible in arranging repayment plans. They will be happy to get any money back, instead of just writing off the entire debt. Take charge and show that you are committed to working things out on a mutually agreeable time table.
Have a great day all!
I agree with Amp that the insurance company will likely be somewhat flexible in arranging repayment plans. They will be happy to get any money back, instead of just writing off the entire debt. Take charge and show that you are committed to working things out on a mutually agreeable time table.
Have a great day all!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 563
Hi, All. Inc, thank you for sharing what you are going through. Sounds like you have a solid plan in place. Just keep taking steps forward, one after the other. It all doesn't have to get solved overnight. You are doing the right things. Sending you all the best!
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,189
Hi Kim!
With three self employed people and two retail managers here, not much time to hang on SR. It's good to see folks pushing on with their lives now without fighting booze everyday.
Work hard, but remember where we all came from 20 months ago. Keep your eye on the prize.
With three self employed people and two retail managers here, not much time to hang on SR. It's good to see folks pushing on with their lives now without fighting booze everyday.
Work hard, but remember where we all came from 20 months ago. Keep your eye on the prize.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Originally Posted by stargazer016
Hi Kim!
With three self employed people and two retail managers here, not much time to hang on SR. It's good to see folks pushing on with their lives now without fighting booze everyday.
Work hard, but remember where we all came from 20 months ago. Keep your eye on the prize.
With three self employed people and two retail managers here, not much time to hang on SR. It's good to see folks pushing on with their lives now without fighting booze everyday.
Work hard, but remember where we all came from 20 months ago. Keep your eye on the prize.
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