Class of August 2015 Pt 2
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 36
day 3 for me. so far so good - just have had things to keep me busy. this year i've had a few short periods of no drinking trying to quit for good...so we'll see how well i'm doing in a few days. haven't slept great the past 2 nights but dreaming which doesn't happen when i drink. realizing how out of shape i am just by being busy the past couple days...i really need to get back to exercise - wish i was one who could find a high in that 
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Posts: 259
It can be so hard at times - feeling the intense emotions that I would previously drink away. The awareness of all the people I have let down and mistakes made. I know though, the only future is through feeling these emotions and trying to make peace, with myself and all of my regrets. Why is it the hardest to forgive me?? Welcome to all just joining this Aug group, this site has been a wonderful resource for me.
Lilly
Lilly
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Ny
Posts: 739
Lilly...Don't beat yourself up. You will see the rewards of sobriety come forward as you ease into things more comfortably while not drinking. Forgive yourself and put the past behind you. We all have made mistakes, probably bad ones, but it's over. Try to focus on today and being a good partner and parent and you will see things change. I know it's hard . I beat myself up with regrets every day and then something small happens...like today 2of my kids (22 and 17 year old) needed my help with big favors that involved a lot of running around for them. I gladly did it and remembered...being available to do this is a gift of sobriety. I could not have helped them when I was drunk and they would have never asked...these were the same kids That 10 years ago I would forget to feed because I would be passed out. I would find them eating cookies and soda for dinner.
Try to get the negative thoughts out if your head.
Have a good evening ..I'm thinking of you
Try to get the negative thoughts out if your head.
Have a good evening ..I'm thinking of you
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: San Francisco, CA
Posts: 1,491
1 Year Check-In !
Hello A-Team ! (Team August) ... at least that's what we called ourselves .... I am from the class of August 2014 and on this day one year ago, I was on Day 1.
I had several failed attempts before then, one of which I stayed sober for 2 months, only to crash and burn because I felt like I was "missing out" on something......
....boy was I wrong !! The only thing I missed out on was the amazing sober life by relapsing.
I just want to check in and say that the first 1-3 months was the absolute toughest, but then it got SO much better, to the point that I actually did feel like I was on cruise control after 90 days or so (which can be dangerous too as we can slip when things are hard, but also when they are easy! -- so always stay on guard and fight for what you deserve: sobriety and freedom from the poison that is alcohol) .
I am not preaching, but I know that when someone from a previous year's class checked in on my class in 2014 and told me how much better it gets, it really helped me thru the dark times and gave me so much hope, especially early on.
The fact is that the physical withdrawals fade away after 1-3 months, depending on the individual, then the "cravings" become more psychological than anything (e.g. your mind telling you "hey you used to drink at these functions, remember?... why not have one or two or three.... or a million today????"). The good news is that your sober muscles become so strong that you can talk yourself out of these "psychological" cravings.
After another month or two I was not even feeling the "psychological" cravings anymore. Sobriety simply became my reality and my norm and knee-jerk reaction to stress over time. I now equate alcohol with disaster, not relaxation. It is a complete 180-degree mind-shift which does happen, one-day-at-a-time, over time. It doesnt take forever, it takes a couple of months.... Hang in here! This site is what got me blasted off into orbit and now I just check in from time to time to remind myself that all the billboards I see around advertising how happy people are drinking is complete B.S. and this site (as well as a Face to Face meeting I attend once per week) reminds me the truth: that alcohol is a slippery slope to nothing but misery.
So proud of you all ! I promise it gets better very very soon and the reward is 1,000 times stronger than the uncomfortable feeling you may be feeling early on while your body detoxes from years of poison.
Just a few things that have changed about me since I stopped drinking (especially after the initial 2-3 months) :
- I am so much more calmer and not so anxious anymore all the time
- I love my tea, not my addictive poison (alcohol)
- My relationship and connection with my wife and daughter is better than it ever has been before
- My wife fully trusts me again
- My family and friends notice I am more confident and healthy-looking
- I am waking up each morning totally regret free and not having to piece together what happened the night before etc.
- I am not angry at myself all the time anymore
- My sense of humor and good spirits are back and better than ever
- All in all I am so proud and garteful for the choice I made to stay sober and happy for life!
Love and hugs !! You guys and gals are amazing !!
-Chris
I had several failed attempts before then, one of which I stayed sober for 2 months, only to crash and burn because I felt like I was "missing out" on something......
....boy was I wrong !! The only thing I missed out on was the amazing sober life by relapsing.
I just want to check in and say that the first 1-3 months was the absolute toughest, but then it got SO much better, to the point that I actually did feel like I was on cruise control after 90 days or so (which can be dangerous too as we can slip when things are hard, but also when they are easy! -- so always stay on guard and fight for what you deserve: sobriety and freedom from the poison that is alcohol) .
I am not preaching, but I know that when someone from a previous year's class checked in on my class in 2014 and told me how much better it gets, it really helped me thru the dark times and gave me so much hope, especially early on.
The fact is that the physical withdrawals fade away after 1-3 months, depending on the individual, then the "cravings" become more psychological than anything (e.g. your mind telling you "hey you used to drink at these functions, remember?... why not have one or two or three.... or a million today????"). The good news is that your sober muscles become so strong that you can talk yourself out of these "psychological" cravings.
After another month or two I was not even feeling the "psychological" cravings anymore. Sobriety simply became my reality and my norm and knee-jerk reaction to stress over time. I now equate alcohol with disaster, not relaxation. It is a complete 180-degree mind-shift which does happen, one-day-at-a-time, over time. It doesnt take forever, it takes a couple of months.... Hang in here! This site is what got me blasted off into orbit and now I just check in from time to time to remind myself that all the billboards I see around advertising how happy people are drinking is complete B.S. and this site (as well as a Face to Face meeting I attend once per week) reminds me the truth: that alcohol is a slippery slope to nothing but misery.
So proud of you all ! I promise it gets better very very soon and the reward is 1,000 times stronger than the uncomfortable feeling you may be feeling early on while your body detoxes from years of poison.
Just a few things that have changed about me since I stopped drinking (especially after the initial 2-3 months) :
- I am so much more calmer and not so anxious anymore all the time
- I love my tea, not my addictive poison (alcohol)
- My relationship and connection with my wife and daughter is better than it ever has been before
- My wife fully trusts me again
- My family and friends notice I am more confident and healthy-looking
- I am waking up each morning totally regret free and not having to piece together what happened the night before etc.
- I am not angry at myself all the time anymore
- My sense of humor and good spirits are back and better than ever
- All in all I am so proud and garteful for the choice I made to stay sober and happy for life!
Love and hugs !! You guys and gals are amazing !!
-Chris
Last edited by calichris; 08-12-2015 at 04:18 PM. Reason: added title
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 2,049
Beer gone , such a great job! Cheering you on!!
Horizon I'm I'm feeling your post big time..
Lilly, please don't be too hard on you. My life feels like one redo after another but people here know what it's like, and can love on you without it being weird. That has been what's saved my life probably.
I've been a walking bomb in the past . I thank God and the people on here for just saying a kind word , or a straight shot now and then ( which I need).
Sending hugs !!
Horizon I'm I'm feeling your post big time..
Lilly, please don't be too hard on you. My life feels like one redo after another but people here know what it's like, and can love on you without it being weird. That has been what's saved my life probably.
I've been a walking bomb in the past . I thank God and the people on here for just saying a kind word , or a straight shot now and then ( which I need).
Sending hugs !!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: California, USA
Posts: 277
Originally Posted by bexxed 
Hi everyone, I don't have much to say today... worked really late last night (I knew that was going to happen) and have to work today too, but am looking forward to a minor league baseball game tonight.
I get paid twice a month, on the first day and on the 15th. So last night I was checking in on my bank statements online. I get paid really well, for me. Well, for a lot of people, I have a good, comfortable income. But I always seem to be able to go through it. I don't end up in trouble, I just never seem to jump ahead. Well, I'm ashamed to give the dollar amount, but dang! It looks like I was spending a crazy amount of money on booze. Because my bank balance is way over what it usually is just before payday. It almost looks like I have spent like, next to nothing. Then I thought about it, and it's true. I've been eating at home and drinking water. Oh, and coffee, that I make at home. This is AMAZING.
I get paid twice a month, on the first day and on the 15th. So last night I was checking in on my bank statements online. I get paid really well, for me. Well, for a lot of people, I have a good, comfortable income. But I always seem to be able to go through it. I don't end up in trouble, I just never seem to jump ahead. Well, I'm ashamed to give the dollar amount, but dang! It looks like I was spending a crazy amount of money on booze. Because my bank balance is way over what it usually is just before payday. It almost looks like I have spent like, next to nothing. Then I thought about it, and it's true. I've been eating at home and drinking water. Oh, and coffee, that I make at home. This is AMAZING.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Ny
Posts: 739
Congrats on a year chris and thanks for sharing.
I initially got sober 10years ago and stayed sober for almost 7 years...I have been struggling for the past . I'm back on day 13 today.
I DID feel all of those things you shared about. My life was great...not problem free but I was able to deal with it with no regrets...I had a sick father who then died,...teenagers who pushed every button, business/financial issues...all the regular stuff people deal with.
Unfortunately I decided to tempt fate and before long iwas right back. I KNOW I cannot have any alcohol. It is not a decision for me. The tough part now is following through. The cravings DO go away. We have to stick it out..
Thanks for supporting us with your story.
Best of luck to you!!!!
I initially got sober 10years ago and stayed sober for almost 7 years...I have been struggling for the past . I'm back on day 13 today.
I DID feel all of those things you shared about. My life was great...not problem free but I was able to deal with it with no regrets...I had a sick father who then died,...teenagers who pushed every button, business/financial issues...all the regular stuff people deal with.
Unfortunately I decided to tempt fate and before long iwas right back. I KNOW I cannot have any alcohol. It is not a decision for me. The tough part now is following through. The cravings DO go away. We have to stick it out..
Thanks for supporting us with your story.
Best of luck to you!!!!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 1,021
Originally Posted by bblackbirdflyy
Rejoining august. Sorry to say I dropped off again. Day 0. I finally looked up some aa meetings. I give in. I'm an alcoholic. I feel like crying. I'm at work, so I cant.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,551
Originally Posted by Time2Rise
Hang tough blackbird; I know it sucks right after a slip, but keep at it and don't give up.
Broken Heart of Gold
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Canada
Posts: 87
Checking in! I had such a crap day yesterday and was concerned about how today would go...but I had a super awesome day despite having loads of stress in my life right now!
Today I was able to ignore the urge to relieve the stress with a drink and instead found that I dealt with the issue in a much more healthy manner!!! It's so inspiring and helpful to read all of your posts.
Today I was able to ignore the urge to relieve the stress with a drink and instead found that I dealt with the issue in a much more healthy manner!!! It's so inspiring and helpful to read all of your posts.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 1,021
Originally Posted by bblackbirdflyy
Ty time2rise. I'm tired of this consuming my life. The trying and trying to stop is getting exhausting.
Maybe I'm just dense and ignoring reality, but I'd rather hang-on to a thread of hope than give into a cynical view of my drinking problem. The truth is there are a number of people here who were in the same boat as us, and they managed to find long-term sobriety, so I know it's possible. And if it was possible for them, it is possible for us.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 563
Welcome back, Blackbird. I remember reading some of your posts from awhile back and I'm so glad you are here. Be kind to yourself - the AV will try and convince you that you are not worth our time but you absolutely are. You absolutely deserve a sober life and your SR family is here for you.
Chris, congratulations on one year!! Thank you for sharing your recovery story. I am in this class because I relapsed at 3 and a half months - that 90 day period got really rough for me. But if I can make it to 90 days once then I can do it again! One day at a time.
I hope you all are doing well and hanging in there. My AV was kind of loud this afternoon so I decided a bag of cookies was what I needed to "reward" myself and shut the AV up. It's early on and giving myself comfort food when the cravings are bad helps.
Chris, congratulations on one year!! Thank you for sharing your recovery story. I am in this class because I relapsed at 3 and a half months - that 90 day period got really rough for me. But if I can make it to 90 days once then I can do it again! One day at a time.
I hope you all are doing well and hanging in there. My AV was kind of loud this afternoon so I decided a bag of cookies was what I needed to "reward" myself and shut the AV up. It's early on and giving myself comfort food when the cravings are bad helps.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2015
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 5
Hi guys!
Hi again guys! I hope everyone is doing good! Can anyone tell me how I can get rid of these stupid thoughts that I can still drink normally!! It seems as if every time my hangover is over I feel I can drink normally again!! It sucks! I had made it to 81 days sober on August 8 but then I just gave in to that feeling.. Any advice would be much appreciated...ohh and btw I have thus restarted my soberiety journey from10 August!!
Last edited by Andy88; 08-12-2015 at 08:59 PM. Reason: Adding a point.
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