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Class of August 2015 Pt 2

Old 08-11-2015, 12:15 AM
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Morning
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Old 08-11-2015, 01:29 AM
  # 162 (permalink)  
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DD, know full well how difficult it can be to transition from long-term relationship to single, especially when you both still love each other. Sorry to hear it.

Are you a cat or dog person? Have you ever maybe thought of getting a pet? I don't know what I'd do without my guys, and without question they help keep me sane and balanced. It's not even much work, just the fact you need to be around all the time to take care of them.
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Old 08-11-2015, 03:29 AM
  # 163 (permalink)  
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I'm sorry for those having some tough times right now. I'm feeling that any emotion is almost a new feeling to me. I've masked them all for so long I don't know how they really feel. So was I really happy sad mad or did I amplify those feelings being drunk or suppress them? I don't know so dealing with any emotion is tough right now. I don't like to feel attacked or exposed either. My bark is a lot worse than my bite because I tend to run from confrontation. Far as family goes, I know they've seen me at my worst and lowest. Might as well start at the bottom and hopefully work up. It will be just as hard for them to understand why we've gone the things we've gone as it will for us to explain it. Maybe a mediator of some sort can help those dealing with this? Just some thoughts. I certainly don't have it all figured out. Hope it gets better as the day goes on. Thank you God for a chance at another 24!
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Old 08-11-2015, 03:36 AM
  # 164 (permalink)  
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Good morning classmates

I'm starting my day 8. Woke up at 3:30 A.M. this morning and couldn't go back to sleep for some reason. Don't know if it's detox related or just one of those things.

Oh well I'll just see what the day brings.

Everybody hang in there!
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Old 08-11-2015, 03:37 AM
  # 165 (permalink)  
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Thank you very much for all the replies. I still feel terrible but did not drink. Ate about 2 pounds of ice cream, a chocolate bar, cried, and in spite of efforts to shut my brain off, couldn't sleep. I feel like a weak, wreck now which does not work well in early sobriety. Hope for the future, self-forgiveness, those emotions and others are what makes me strong. Will have to have words with my son. I am a social person but very private when it comes to my feelings and struggles. Also I feel so lonely. I need to start attending social activities again. Being in the early stage, however, often people are all drinking and happy or not drinking because I'm there and not having a drink. All I want to do in both situations is leave. Now I have the stress of this huge argument with my husband on top and between it all I am going to explode. He has been very public to family and friends about my struggles and I resent him for it so much. Looking at a list of AA meetings right now. I hope everyone keeps strong on this journey and has a great day!! Thanks again for your support! I don't personally know any of you people but I know you all get it and it helps to be able to share and get your feedback a great deal!
Lilly
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Old 08-11-2015, 03:47 AM
  # 166 (permalink)  
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In the fight for it !
I may be crying by end of the day, but I'm determined right now!
It's tue morning day 1 of 4 at work. Stuck my foot into my workboots this morning. ------ right into a chunk of food that fell off my plate Saturday night when I was drunk eating, and dropped it.
I cleaned up the floor but missed the fact I had filled up my boot.
I'm forgiven but I'm reminded there's a price for choosing to drink when I didn't have to.
I hope y'all's day goes ok, and the troubles ease enough for us to get a breath. Thinking of y'all.
Day 2.
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Old 08-11-2015, 03:55 AM
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Hey Troy. I think you were in the July thread? I have two small dogs who I adore. They are very old and very well loved. There is no lingering love in the long term relationship I lost but the short term one that saved me from that. Well I done screwed up big time and regret it. I really thought he was the one.

Lily JL I know your hurting still and I am so proud of you both for holding out and keeping on.

Key I totally understand. Other than a few bouts of crying I often can't seem to find much pleasure or feeling in anything.
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Old 08-11-2015, 04:24 AM
  # 168 (permalink)  
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Morning All, day 5 and slowly I am getting me back. Spoke more to my wife in these past 2 days than I have in months, helps that I am off work and can spend time with wife and kids as that's what I need. I think the shame aspect can be worse than the physical withdrawls but every day sober means putting distance between me and what I was. Happy Tuesday everyone.
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Old 08-11-2015, 04:27 AM
  # 169 (permalink)  
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G'morning folks. Got a decent night sleep. No hangover, coffee. Not bad.
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Old 08-11-2015, 05:14 AM
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Good morning all,
Just a quick check in! It seems like many of us are all struggling with the emotions. I'm right there with you...it's a roller coaster...stay her, post often and don't drink....no matter what!!!
Anyone coming back .....stay here and don't give up.
Welcome to newcomers....this is a great place with tons of support!!!

Lost lily.....my heart is with you....mad at the husband, broken about the kids, emotional all over the place. It's a rough road but stick with it. Like someone said, a sober mom will be their superhero...no matter what!

Gotta go, have a sober Tuesday
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Old 08-11-2015, 05:27 AM
  # 171 (permalink)  
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Good morning everyone. Day 10.

Had another strange dream last night, and woke up with a bad headache. I've had headaches all my life, so this is nothing new, and at least this one is free from hangover guilt.

Sorry to hear about other people struggling. We can do this.
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Old 08-11-2015, 05:35 AM
  # 172 (permalink)  
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It saddens me to see so many of our classmates struggling. Maybe it's a common thread, in part, because we are so new to abstinence. Life in general can throw out some pretty crappy situations, and we are used to softening the blow with a drink or 2 or several.

Mother Theresa once said (something like), God won't give you more than you can handle...I just wish He didn't think I could handle so much! So that's where I see some of us. God sure has thrown a lot on our plates. But I have no doubt He can help us through it.

For me, I am once again sitting on my deck with my morning coffee. I hit double digits today. Day 10.

Hang in there Class of August.
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Old 08-11-2015, 05:35 AM
  # 173 (permalink)  
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LostLilly,
I would feel resentful too. I can completely relate to this. It should be you telling people you have this problem. It should be you when you feel like you can handle letting people know the truth. Once it's out the accountability steps in. If you fail, fail on your own terms. I don't know the full situation you have there. I did tell my husband to NOT tell people. I told him I would tell people as I feel like it. I felt like I needed to deal with this a little on my own and become a little more clearer all around before I allowed everyone to know what I am struggling with because regular drinkers won't understand what your problem is and I feel like they will judge me unfairly. They still may. Of course my husband knows, my children, my Mom (cause she was in Al-Anon for a hundred years) my ex-sister in-law, and my brother in law, my mother in law. The circle is growing a little at a time, but on my time. I feel like God is giving me only what I can handle at the time by doing it this way. This "alcoholism" is full of boundaries I feel. They will fade with time I think, but today, this is how it is for me.
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Old 08-11-2015, 05:41 AM
  # 174 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by DitzyDandelion View Post
Hey Troy. I think you were in the July thread? I have two small dogs who I adore. They are very old and very well loved. There is no lingering love in the long term relationship I lost but the short term one that saved me from that. Well I done screwed up big time and regret it. I really thought he was the one.

Lily JL I know your hurting still and I am so proud of you both for holding out and keeping on.

Key I totally understand. Other than a few bouts of crying I often can't seem to find much pleasure or feeling in anything.
DitzyD,
I hold on tight to the fact that I am praying and hoping this all will get better. I am putting my faith and trust in the HP. Whatever your HP may be. It doesn't have to be a "God" or a god like thing. Your recovery group could be your HP. Something that makes you feel you can believe in. It is so hard to control something that is completely uncontrollable. Only you guys will understand that! I pray for you to find some relief too..
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Old 08-11-2015, 05:45 AM
  # 175 (permalink)  
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Old 08-11-2015, 07:45 AM
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Day 3 for me. Surprised (for the hundredth time) at just how rough the first few days are for me. It feels like 3 weeks. Not in the urge to drink at all, but the intense sleep, dreaming, bouts of nightmares and also just random dreams, the desire to eat, and no desire to eat. What a poison this is. I realize how fortunate I am to have this week off.

I do feel much better than yesterday, and hope everyone has a good Tuesday!
Lee
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Old 08-11-2015, 07:50 AM
  # 177 (permalink)  
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Morning, All. Another morning without a hangover. No matter how upset and negative I am while sober it is never as bad as waking up with the hangover- the shaking, nausea, dizziness, guilt, and anxiety pushing down on my body. We can do it- hang in there during these first few days and it WILL get better - you will start to feel free, the anxiety and guilt will be lifted and you will be able to take a big breath.

To those struggling, allow yourself to be comforted: ice cream, sweets, cozy jammies in bed binge watching Netflix - whatever it takes to keep you from drinking. It does get better! One day at a time.
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Old 08-11-2015, 07:52 AM
  # 178 (permalink)  
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Hey everybody, I know what your going through. After the physical detox then the emotions show up. Alcohol physically changed our brain, and just like a broken bone, it takes time for our brains to heal and become biochemically balanced. Remember it's OK to take it easy - we are RECOVERING!
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Old 08-11-2015, 09:46 AM
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Good day, everyone. Today is feeling like a hard one -- I'm only a few hours into the day and already there are a million thoughts running through my mind.

My wife just sent me a text that she was inviting some people to a 40th bday dinner next month -- which I really don't want her to do because I don't want to have to "come out" as not drinking. I guess I need to get over that but its triggering feelings of shame\embarrassment -- followed quickly by the thought that I can drink that one night and it wont be a big deal. Ugh!
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Old 08-11-2015, 10:26 AM
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I have hit that point I think where I don't really care what people think of me not drinking. Some advice that could work for an event like that though is just fill a glass with something that looks a similar colour to a drinkie. People may just assume you are drinking. If people are invited to yours should be easy to ensure you always keep yourself topped up with something non alcoholic and perhaps no one will ask.

Personally though as I said, if people are going to be difficult about it that is their problem not mine. I have enough of my own thank you very much. lol
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