Class of April 2015 Part 6
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 560
Hi all,
Thank you all for your good wishes! Congratulations to all those hitting their milestones. Woohoo! That includes ZaB who also hit 70 yesterday...
Cauliflower we are all there with you. Just don't have that first drink - nothing will be improved by doing that. Really hope all goes well, in the circumstances.
A belated welcome back to SK!
Today is a good day for me! Done the first half of today's exercise (long story) and boy does it always feel good when I finish (even if I don't want to start). And exercising without a hangover - still just awesome.
Up n at em, and none for me today.
Best wishes
OMD
Thank you all for your good wishes! Congratulations to all those hitting their milestones. Woohoo! That includes ZaB who also hit 70 yesterday...
Cauliflower we are all there with you. Just don't have that first drink - nothing will be improved by doing that. Really hope all goes well, in the circumstances.
A belated welcome back to SK!
Today is a good day for me! Done the first half of today's exercise (long story) and boy does it always feel good when I finish (even if I don't want to start). And exercising without a hangover - still just awesome.
Up n at em, and none for me today.
Best wishes
OMD
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
Cauliflower...today is going to be a tough day and a great day. It'll be great to honor your dear friends life. Life is precious. Obviously your friends life meant something to you and I'm sure it meant a lot to others. The same goes for your life. Honor your friends life by not taking your life for granted. Make the most of what has been given to you.
I can share with you my personal experience when I lost my Dad. I had a lot of regret. For several reasons. I wish I had done a few things differently while he was alive. A couple of them were fairly major, at least in my eyes. And one thing I am really good at is self destruction. I tend to punish myself severely.
Upon my Dad's death, I started an addiction to pain killers. He had left behind oxi's and morphine patches. I popped his pills then cut and chewed on his morphine patches. When those were gone, I stole pain killers from other family members. Made up stories and got some from doctors.
When pain killers weren't all that easy to get I started exploring other drugs and became addicted to drugs that I could buy at head shops. Like bath salts and synthetic marijuana. Soon those weren't easy to get as laws got tougher. That's when my alcohol use ramped up. I switched from beer to liquor and it was all down hill from there.
My dad died 6/12/12 and I'm just now finally clean of everything. In those years I got divorced and lost my 20yr career.
Now I finally see that my life is precious. That my Dad wants me to live it to its fullest. I talk to him more than ever now and he's a strong inspiration for my sobriety.
Some people can have one glass of wine and be ok with that. We cannot. We know that because we have tried. Several times.
Respect and honor your friends life by appreciating yours. Live long on prosper. That's what your friend would want for you.
None for me today.
You'll be in my thoughts. Stay strong for yourself and for those who love you.
I can share with you my personal experience when I lost my Dad. I had a lot of regret. For several reasons. I wish I had done a few things differently while he was alive. A couple of them were fairly major, at least in my eyes. And one thing I am really good at is self destruction. I tend to punish myself severely.
Upon my Dad's death, I started an addiction to pain killers. He had left behind oxi's and morphine patches. I popped his pills then cut and chewed on his morphine patches. When those were gone, I stole pain killers from other family members. Made up stories and got some from doctors.
When pain killers weren't all that easy to get I started exploring other drugs and became addicted to drugs that I could buy at head shops. Like bath salts and synthetic marijuana. Soon those weren't easy to get as laws got tougher. That's when my alcohol use ramped up. I switched from beer to liquor and it was all down hill from there.
My dad died 6/12/12 and I'm just now finally clean of everything. In those years I got divorced and lost my 20yr career.
Now I finally see that my life is precious. That my Dad wants me to live it to its fullest. I talk to him more than ever now and he's a strong inspiration for my sobriety.
Some people can have one glass of wine and be ok with that. We cannot. We know that because we have tried. Several times.
Respect and honor your friends life by appreciating yours. Live long on prosper. That's what your friend would want for you.
None for me today.
You'll be in my thoughts. Stay strong for yourself and for those who love you.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 1,277
Thanks for sharing incontrol. Puts things in perspective.
Thinking of you cauliflower. Stay close to SR and play it out.
Today is going well for me. Watched Trumps speech this morning. That was interesting...
Hope everyone gets through the day with ease.
Thinking of you cauliflower. Stay close to SR and play it out.
Today is going well for me. Watched Trumps speech this morning. That was interesting...
Hope everyone gets through the day with ease.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spain
Posts: 2,004
Hey all!
One of those days. Just a hard slog from 9am to 9,30pm. But ok. Got stuff done. Kept it all together. AV had a little dig at around 8pm (my old beer o'clock) but I didn't take it seriously.
When I got in the kids were still up and in chatty mood. My youngest showed me her dance moves for a school play and we had a bit of fun jumping round the living room together. Then I tested my oldest for a science test he has tomorrow and we shared a couple of jokes. Just ordinary stuff, but the kind of ordinary stuff I didn't used to be so plugged into as I was normally worrying about something else. Glad I don't have to do that anymore!!!
Hasta maņana!
One of those days. Just a hard slog from 9am to 9,30pm. But ok. Got stuff done. Kept it all together. AV had a little dig at around 8pm (my old beer o'clock) but I didn't take it seriously.
When I got in the kids were still up and in chatty mood. My youngest showed me her dance moves for a school play and we had a bit of fun jumping round the living room together. Then I tested my oldest for a science test he has tomorrow and we shared a couple of jokes. Just ordinary stuff, but the kind of ordinary stuff I didn't used to be so plugged into as I was normally worrying about something else. Glad I don't have to do that anymore!!!
Hasta maņana!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 691
All is well! Just checking in. The service was perfect and now we are at the after party get together, which we will be leaving soon. No drinking for me, not even tempted! Isn't that strange after last night's thoughts. Thank you for being here, much appreciated.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 560
Originally Posted by Cauliflower 
All is well! Just checking in. The service was perfect and now we are at the after party get together, which we will be leaving soon. No drinking for me, not even tempted! Isn't that strange after last night's thoughts. Thank you for being here, much appreciated.
I had a wobble earlier - just the usual AV nonsense but none for me. Tomorrow's going to be a bright and sober day!
Best wishes
OMD
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
Cauli...
Good for you girl.
Isn't it a shame how people get together like that for only weddings and funerals?
How wonderful would life be if at least once a year our friends and families met up. As I type it makes me think how I should be more in touch. I alienate myself from everybody through every means possible. No calls, no Facebook, no emails, no xmas cards, nothing.
I pull myself away from it all. Yet when I do get together with cousins, aunts, uncles, I love it. And every time we all say, we need to get together more often.
Good for you girl.
Isn't it a shame how people get together like that for only weddings and funerals?
How wonderful would life be if at least once a year our friends and families met up. As I type it makes me think how I should be more in touch. I alienate myself from everybody through every means possible. No calls, no Facebook, no emails, no xmas cards, nothing.
I pull myself away from it all. Yet when I do get together with cousins, aunts, uncles, I love it. And every time we all say, we need to get together more often.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
Hi guys! Loved this group. I've been in April, good but not the same as here. Now unfortunately looks like I should be in June. Lily good job in getting back up too!!
I've had a few occasions of more where I've felt good and just totally disregarded all I know. This has been a learning experience. I'm letting things go and starting to think differently. Realizing I'm accountable to me. I never saw myself as an authority figure.
I was telling the other group I'm just a big kid. I never transitioned to manhood. Maybe in some ways, of course everyone gets wiser. But it hasn't been the real leap.
Summer has me feeling so much better. I'm still trying to get out of this apartment and do a little moving around and relocation. I'm not running away, I'm running towards something. Of course I'll have to be conscious of exactly what I'm doing, and yes I know I'll take myself with me. But this town, my apartment surrounded by bars (when I get out in the country, I simply don't drink). The winters. And the father. If my sister could do it, she send me to Jupiter to be get me away from him. My brother and sister are being extremely supportive.
I think you guys get how I feel about it here. Anyway, I hope to get back with you guys and keep going on this journey. Did I just say 'journey?' Besides I need OMD to appreciate my rants.
Also excuse the typos still on the iphone 5.
J
I've had a few occasions of more where I've felt good and just totally disregarded all I know. This has been a learning experience. I'm letting things go and starting to think differently. Realizing I'm accountable to me. I never saw myself as an authority figure.
I was telling the other group I'm just a big kid. I never transitioned to manhood. Maybe in some ways, of course everyone gets wiser. But it hasn't been the real leap.
Summer has me feeling so much better. I'm still trying to get out of this apartment and do a little moving around and relocation. I'm not running away, I'm running towards something. Of course I'll have to be conscious of exactly what I'm doing, and yes I know I'll take myself with me. But this town, my apartment surrounded by bars (when I get out in the country, I simply don't drink). The winters. And the father. If my sister could do it, she send me to Jupiter to be get me away from him. My brother and sister are being extremely supportive.
I think you guys get how I feel about it here. Anyway, I hope to get back with you guys and keep going on this journey. Did I just say 'journey?' Besides I need OMD to appreciate my rants.
Also excuse the typos still on the iphone 5.
J
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Canada
Posts: 691
Home now and just totally exhausted mentally and physically. It was an incredible day, this man was loved by everyone he met. The funeral service was standing room only with over 400 people in attendance! The grave side ceremony was basically just close friends and family, and was very intimate and peaceful. The get together at the farm afterwards was interesting, as everyone was just unwinding after a strenuous few days. The thought of drinking just didn't cross my mind. I am very proud of myself. I am off to bed early tonight, I don't think I slept much last night.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Northeast, US
Posts: 2,073
I meant I've been in MAY! Wait, and I said Lily instead of Martina. I read the last 20 posts trying to catch up and got confused.
And my lord that post is loaded with typos. I swear I'm not on drugs. I hate typing on that little phone. I'm on the computer now.
And my lord that post is loaded with typos. I swear I'm not on drugs. I hate typing on that little phone. I'm on the computer now.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
Wow cauli. Just wow.
400 standing room only. Sheesh.
Really takes me back to what's important.
I really want to remembered for more than what I would be remembered for today. If I kicked the bucket right now, there's no way 1 hundred would show. Best case, maybe 50. Realistically, probably 25. And I come from a large family. My mom is the oldest of 10 kids. I don't even know how many cousins I have. I have uncles that are younger then me. So at the end of it all, I rely on family and only family to hit that 25, when I should be able to hit 50...easy.
All comes down again to alienation.
400 standing room only. Sheesh.
Really takes me back to what's important.
I really want to remembered for more than what I would be remembered for today. If I kicked the bucket right now, there's no way 1 hundred would show. Best case, maybe 50. Realistically, probably 25. And I come from a large family. My mom is the oldest of 10 kids. I don't even know how many cousins I have. I have uncles that are younger then me. So at the end of it all, I rely on family and only family to hit that 25, when I should be able to hit 50...easy.
All comes down again to alienation.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 2,412
Johnny....
Thank you for checking in. Means a lot.
I'll be honest, I've been following you in May periodically. I'm glad to see you've been moving forward. You're like family here. Keep us up to date. I know for a fact that I'm not the only one who misses you.
At the end of the day, you made a HUGE commitment to get control of your life along with the rest of us. Did you give up? NO! HELL NO!
Keep it up buddy. It's a long journey. And as I'm learning, it's more than just not drinking. More than pushing through acute withdrawals. Not to minimize early quit, that was a freakin bitch. But there's more to it.
You're doing awesome buddy. Nine of us are out of the woods yet. But it seems we are all on the right path. The woods aren't so dense now. We can see the way out.
I'm really happy for you. As hard as I think I have it, you have it harder. I don't know why. I can't pin it on anything specific. I just feel as though my sobriety is easier than yours. And I think mine is hard as hell.
Bottom line is...your sobriety means something to me. And in happy to watch you progress b
Thank you for checking in. Means a lot.
I'll be honest, I've been following you in May periodically. I'm glad to see you've been moving forward. You're like family here. Keep us up to date. I know for a fact that I'm not the only one who misses you.
At the end of the day, you made a HUGE commitment to get control of your life along with the rest of us. Did you give up? NO! HELL NO!
Keep it up buddy. It's a long journey. And as I'm learning, it's more than just not drinking. More than pushing through acute withdrawals. Not to minimize early quit, that was a freakin bitch. But there's more to it.
You're doing awesome buddy. Nine of us are out of the woods yet. But it seems we are all on the right path. The woods aren't so dense now. We can see the way out.
I'm really happy for you. As hard as I think I have it, you have it harder. I don't know why. I can't pin it on anything specific. I just feel as though my sobriety is easier than yours. And I think mine is hard as hell.
Bottom line is...your sobriety means something to me. And in happy to watch you progress b
Member
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 563
Hi All. Just wanted to quickly check in - Cauliflower I'm glad you are well. Sounds like it was a wonderful tribute to your friend. Incontrol, thank you for your insights. You always have great things to say and I identify with a lot of it. Johnny, welcome back! Good to hear from you.
I hope everyone is well. I am going to bed grateful for this group and grateful for my sobriety.
I hope everyone is well. I am going to bed grateful for this group and grateful for my sobriety.
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