One Year & Over Part 43
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
Glee,
Perfect description of managing yourself first. Poor managers can't manage themselves, that is why they can be so irritating. You keep managing your-self, others become easier.
Sometimes, even when it seems to be terrifying to hold back and wait it out, many times the trigger was all yours and the crisis turns out to be a yawn for everyone else. Trust me.
Amazingly folks who are poor managers avoid any and all conflict because they cannot control themselves to be the cooler head that prevails. They have no conflict management tools.
A company is not judged by the absence of conflict, but by how they manage it. See, conflict is normal. If everyone is terrified and will not speak at all something is very wrong. I like the win-win ending but some folks won't allow it.
Conflict Management Techniques
https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_81.htm
Let me define learning. "learning is a change in behavior." That is mine I wrote it because so many get it wrong. People read something and ignore levels of learning. Learning is not data acquisition. So many people do not practice practice practice, one technique at a time, until they have it as second nature.
The three basic levels of learning are
1. Familiar - you can recognize it two out of five times and know a bit about something about it. I am familiar with Einstein's Theory of relativity as E-mc2, but I cannot apply it or teach it. At this level they can recognize it. An observable change in behavior.
2. Application - At this level you can do a task. There is an actual observable change in behavior. Someone can read about swimming and if thrown into deep water you can observe drowndering and floundering. When they practice and "learn" to swim you can see that swimming as a definite change in behavior.
3. Understanding- At this level you understand the subject and can not only do it but can teach it to others and improve it. A change in behavior both physical, verbal, and intellectual.
Many folks attend a class or read a book and feel good about themselves and make no changes because they recognize one or two or a few things they already do. They feel uncomfortable and fake using techniques with others not acknowledging that shaking hands, kissing on the cheek, posture and language in a professional setting are all techniques and learned behaviors.
When dealing with others just paying attention without overdoing the praise or the criticism can get another's rapt attention.
Negative people think doing the "Butt drop" to others is a way to lessen a criticism, and is usually done poorly by one who doesn't care about the feelings of others. Here is the "Butt Drop:" Hey Itch, I really liked your work on the post yesterday, but I think you are using some out of date sources.
The "Butt Drop" is a pet peeve of mine when dealing with upward management. It is sooooo patronizing.
Management is fun, challenging, and with some "learning" by reading and practicing as needed, is a never ending source of pleasure. And people love you for it. Most folks hate getting blamed for their people's or bosses mistakes. I find it hard to take credit for my people's work and when they gave me awards NCO of the universe, I would tell folks that my folks earned it not me. It took me a few times to realize that folks needed me to just say thanks and take credit when an award was specifically the subject. IT turns out I was being selfish. People want to look up to others they know and see that it is possible for them too. Give them that and stop agonizing. Your people know you won for them. They know they did it too, because you empowered them and followed up and made sure they weren't alone in anything. Not micromanaged, just keeping in the loop and encouraging.
Nite guys.
Perfect description of managing yourself first. Poor managers can't manage themselves, that is why they can be so irritating. You keep managing your-self, others become easier.
Sometimes, even when it seems to be terrifying to hold back and wait it out, many times the trigger was all yours and the crisis turns out to be a yawn for everyone else. Trust me.
Amazingly folks who are poor managers avoid any and all conflict because they cannot control themselves to be the cooler head that prevails. They have no conflict management tools.
A company is not judged by the absence of conflict, but by how they manage it. See, conflict is normal. If everyone is terrified and will not speak at all something is very wrong. I like the win-win ending but some folks won't allow it.
Conflict Management Techniques
https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_81.htm
Let me define learning. "learning is a change in behavior." That is mine I wrote it because so many get it wrong. People read something and ignore levels of learning. Learning is not data acquisition. So many people do not practice practice practice, one technique at a time, until they have it as second nature.
The three basic levels of learning are
1. Familiar - you can recognize it two out of five times and know a bit about something about it. I am familiar with Einstein's Theory of relativity as E-mc2, but I cannot apply it or teach it. At this level they can recognize it. An observable change in behavior.
2. Application - At this level you can do a task. There is an actual observable change in behavior. Someone can read about swimming and if thrown into deep water you can observe drowndering and floundering. When they practice and "learn" to swim you can see that swimming as a definite change in behavior.
3. Understanding- At this level you understand the subject and can not only do it but can teach it to others and improve it. A change in behavior both physical, verbal, and intellectual.
Many folks attend a class or read a book and feel good about themselves and make no changes because they recognize one or two or a few things they already do. They feel uncomfortable and fake using techniques with others not acknowledging that shaking hands, kissing on the cheek, posture and language in a professional setting are all techniques and learned behaviors.
When dealing with others just paying attention without overdoing the praise or the criticism can get another's rapt attention.
Negative people think doing the "Butt drop" to others is a way to lessen a criticism, and is usually done poorly by one who doesn't care about the feelings of others. Here is the "Butt Drop:" Hey Itch, I really liked your work on the post yesterday, but I think you are using some out of date sources.
The "Butt Drop" is a pet peeve of mine when dealing with upward management. It is sooooo patronizing.
Management is fun, challenging, and with some "learning" by reading and practicing as needed, is a never ending source of pleasure. And people love you for it. Most folks hate getting blamed for their people's or bosses mistakes. I find it hard to take credit for my people's work and when they gave me awards NCO of the universe, I would tell folks that my folks earned it not me. It took me a few times to realize that folks needed me to just say thanks and take credit when an award was specifically the subject. IT turns out I was being selfish. People want to look up to others they know and see that it is possible for them too. Give them that and stop agonizing. Your people know you won for them. They know they did it too, because you empowered them and followed up and made sure they weren't alone in anything. Not micromanaged, just keeping in the loop and encouraging.
Nite guys.
Sober date 5/1/13
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Staffordshire UK
Posts: 3,547
Good morning Overs.
Cool (2.4C) and bright here this morning. I moved a tarpaulin yesterday expecting the couple of dozen hibernating queen wasps (yellow jackets) but instead there were hibernating Peacock butter flies, glad I was careful.
Have a Wondrous Wednesday everyone.
Cool (2.4C) and bright here this morning. I moved a tarpaulin yesterday expecting the couple of dozen hibernating queen wasps (yellow jackets) but instead there were hibernating Peacock butter flies, glad I was careful.
Have a Wondrous Wednesday everyone.
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,846
Hey Itch, I really liked your work on the post yesterday, but I think you are using some out of date sources (sorry, couldn't resist)
I'm pretty lucky as my boss of the past 25 years trusts me to get the job done right and on time. Of course, it helps that I love my work.
We tied a record high of 77F yesterday! Rainy and cooler here this morning, with a high of 60F...still not bad for this time of year.
Happy Hump-Day, overs!
I'm pretty lucky as my boss of the past 25 years trusts me to get the job done right and on time. Of course, it helps that I love my work.We tied a record high of 77F yesterday! Rainy and cooler here this morning, with a high of 60F...still not bad for this time of year.
Happy Hump-Day, overs!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,181
Hey O's,
I managed offices and folks for 19 years. Haha, an active alkie as a boss - wow, I was a horrible boss. Recovery tools would help me today, but, I just wouldn't be all that into it. Mid 90's I realized that the easier, softer way was to be a sales rep and responsible for just myself. Work less hours and make more scratch - sooo, all I ask is for ia a product/service to believe in, a reasonable quota, non-complicated comp plan (1 page), and a rope. Oh, the rope - to hang myself - figuratively, of course, if I do not make quota. My activity and planning reports can be the sales - period.
WooHoo, to be in 70's today...so golf is on my horizon. Looks to be the last really nice, warm day...till Florida again in mid-December.
I managed offices and folks for 19 years. Haha, an active alkie as a boss - wow, I was a horrible boss. Recovery tools would help me today, but, I just wouldn't be all that into it. Mid 90's I realized that the easier, softer way was to be a sales rep and responsible for just myself. Work less hours and make more scratch - sooo, all I ask is for ia a product/service to believe in, a reasonable quota, non-complicated comp plan (1 page), and a rope. Oh, the rope - to hang myself - figuratively, of course, if I do not make quota. My activity and planning reports can be the sales - period.
WooHoo, to be in 70's today...so golf is on my horizon. Looks to be the last really nice, warm day...till Florida again in mid-December.
Re-Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Colorado Springs, Colorado
Posts: 7,583
84° here now! I hope we get more than the weak cold front predicted. Tomorrow through next Thursday it will be mid to upper 70s. It was a record high today beating the 2003 record of 82.
Am installing motion detector fixtures and gotta go before I lose the light!
TTYL Overs!
Am installing motion detector fixtures and gotta go before I lose the light!
TTYL Overs!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
Today was such a beautiful day here in CT, a perfect sunny, mild day.
It was a busy one for me. I was up at 4 am to take my mother to the hospital for a procedure. Fortunately it turned out well. Then hockey practice followed by a wild goose chase around town for spray-in hair color for the wacky hair day fundraiser at the elementary school.
I am beat, but after the depression of early recovery, I cherish days where I feel well enough to fit in a full day.
It was a busy one for me. I was up at 4 am to take my mother to the hospital for a procedure. Fortunately it turned out well. Then hockey practice followed by a wild goose chase around town for spray-in hair color for the wacky hair day fundraiser at the elementary school.
I am beat, but after the depression of early recovery, I cherish days where I feel well enough to fit in a full day.
Sober date 5/1/13
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Staffordshire UK
Posts: 3,547
Good morning Overs.
Glee we have some green and orange hair spray left. We once had some orange and green sun screen that the kids thought was fun. It did make them look as if we had beaten them so the sun screen went in the trash.
Please send me some patience. I'm 'helping' my 81 yo Dad hang a door today. He knows what should be done but the implementation slips. If I can persuade him to wear his glasses and keep his blood sugar up we'll do fine.
Have a Thrilling Thursday everyone.
Glee we have some green and orange hair spray left. We once had some orange and green sun screen that the kids thought was fun. It did make them look as if we had beaten them so the sun screen went in the trash.
Please send me some patience. I'm 'helping' my 81 yo Dad hang a door today. He knows what should be done but the implementation slips. If I can persuade him to wear his glasses and keep his blood sugar up we'll do fine.
Have a Thrilling Thursday everyone.
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,169
Aww wee Andy helping his daddy do chores! How the decades alter the dimensions of the relationships! I remember my gran lived with us when she became frail, and hated relinquishing any of her independence even in the name of safety.
I hope Pops blood sugar stays up and your blood pressure stays down.
I hope Pops blood sugar stays up and your blood pressure stays down.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2015
Location: Central Texas
Posts: 1,501
Good morning everybody! I have an appointment with the dermatologist today for a body scan. Hope everything goes well.
This crazy warm weather is continuing here too but there is a good chance of some much needed rain today.
How did the door go Andy?
This crazy warm weather is continuing here too but there is a good chance of some much needed rain today.
How did the door go Andy?
non-drinker
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 13,846
Hope everything went well, Andy. Wish my Dad was still around to do such things.
Looks like a nice stretch of weather here in Milwaukee for the next few days. Sunny with temps in the low 60sF...can't ask for much better this time of year.
Have a Thunderous Thursday, overs!
Looks like a nice stretch of weather here in Milwaukee for the next few days. Sunny with temps in the low 60sF...can't ask for much better this time of year.
Have a Thunderous Thursday, overs!
Quit 4/17/15
Join Date: Jul 2015
Location: Pa
Posts: 15,181
Andy, you need the patience of a saint to hang a door. At least in my old house where nothing is true!
Great stuff on management principles Itch. Lots of material for me to investigate when time allows.
Beautiful low 70's here yesterday. I did a long walk through one of the more well known gardens by me. Picture perfect fall day and it really recharged my soul.
Have a great day all!
Great stuff on management principles Itch. Lots of material for me to investigate when time allows.
Beautiful low 70's here yesterday. I did a long walk through one of the more well known gardens by me. Picture perfect fall day and it really recharged my soul.
Have a great day all!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 2,707
Quick hello overs as I have to head to work. Just had my second night in my new place, it's just lovely is all I can say.
It's been raining here nonstop for something like 25 days?
First day of the new job today.
Have a thirsty-for-learning Thursday.
It's been raining here nonstop for something like 25 days?
First day of the new job today.
Have a thirsty-for-learning Thursday.
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