Supertired

Hey guys! Checking in. Very happy to say Christmas has been great . Saw a glimpse of my old self. Present and interested in those around me. Fun and without the weight of the world on his shoulders.
This has been a great choice
Couldn't have done without you novemberers!

SwimKim12

Hi, All. Supertired, I'm glad you had a great Christmas! Good to hear!

Enfin, I'm in the same place as you. I need to find at psychiatrist at the behest of my GP. Need to tell my mom about it today before I head back home so that I can ask her to help pay for it. Not looking forward to it but I know it's necessary for my sobriety.

Otherwise doing well. Back to work tomorrow after a week off. Bah humbug! Ha. I hope you all have a good one!

KiKi0615

Hi everyone!

I couldn't sleep last night so I decided to update our class list again! Haha! I haven't kept track of how long people have been sober but put together a list of our November 2015 classmates who are still very active and doing well/still fighting!

This list is in no particular order:
-Canguy
-Me (Kiki)
-Patricia
-Pam's
-CurlyGirl
-KeepNitreal (KIR)
-BlackBirdFly
-SwimKim
-MeShelly
-Supertired
-Max74
-ForeverFuzzy
-Jemma44
-Snowvelvet
-Badger257
-Tufty13
-Faithfulandfree
-SoberMarathon
-Introspectator
-RedAndy
-Rah555
-Ultradad
-Fabat50
-Enfinthechange
-Augusta1893
-Paul37
-IronPhoenix
-CristinaN
-Soonerman
-Lastchance77
-Olivia2011
-JQuick72

Classmates who I am worried about because I haven't seen them on SR in quite a while are:
(Hopefully they are fine but just out of town or something)

-HealthyGoals
-StrangeAngel
-GoldenSands
-Noolan
-Thumbelina
-DariaM
-Blondsober
-GoldCoastGirl
-Odelle
-TryinginTexas
-Onetimeless
-Dallow
-Learntofly
-Tootsiesdad
-Alphonse
-amitranjan04
-got2stopnow
-SilentCinemaFan
-VanillaChaiTea
-Deniselarkin
-Determined82
-Missy7
-Tatersalad
-FruityMarizapan

PLEASE CHECK IN AND LET US KNOW YOU'RE OK! WE CARE!

Let me know if I forgot anyone!

CristinaN

Thanks Kiki. I'm here. Very busy. Lots of family. I'll check back in soon. Hope y'all are all doing ok

Keepnitreal

Hi all-
I hope you're all recovering from all the food!!! I feel like a bloated pig!
Kiki- I'm here at day 49! 195 drinks not consumed and 19,500 calories saved!
Next it's New Years Eve and hopefully things will settle down a bit for all of us!!!!
At least fewer parties and temptation above normal?!

Enfin-they have AA meeting online I think?

enfinthechange

Ha.... good on the 49 days, half century tomorrow!!! Wooooòoooooo. ... online aa, will give it a look! Thanks x

Keepnitreal

A quick story to give each of us food for thought!!!!
Last night at 1:00am my sons GF of 8 years rolled her SUV on the highway after hitting another car. She is a 3rd year law student, beautiful, smart, and has everything going for her. I've noticed an increase in her drinking with the stress of school and she has alcoholism that runs in her family (her aunt on her mother's side died at 40h and her father couldn't drive to the hospital because he had been drinking. Anyway, it's not my place to say anything, but I'm watching her and seeing myself at her age.
Long story short....her injuries were fairly minimal and nobody else was hurt (she's a very lucky girl) but as each of us showed up to the hospital we all had the same fear.....how much alcohol was onboard??!! My son said he had talked to her about 10 minutes before and she said she was fine, had 2 drinks earlier but water the previous hour or so. Her BAC landed up being .05 so there will be no legal consequences, but just imagine how much different that outcome could have been! This amazing girl with such a bright future could have destroyed it all because of alcohol. What if she was over the limit? What is she couldn't get her law license? What if she hurt another person and went to jail?
These are the chances we take when we chose to drink! Let's chose to NOT drink! I hope she makes that choice in the future!

KiKi0615

I almost drank!

Ugh. It's been a **** day. Nothing bad happened, I've just had a bad attitude & have been depressed. I'm not sure why other than just exhaustion from the holidays & watching people drink & be "Merry"!

My husband got home from his parents house about an hour ago & the first thing I did was yell at him for calling me drunk last night. He's not an alcoholic but was with his brothers last night & drank pretty heavily. It triggered me! The whole reason I left his parents early was so I didn't have to be around drinking. Maybe I was just jealous that he could drink & I couldn't? Possible.

Anyway...after I yelled at him an hour ago, I told him I was gonna go drink & it was all his fault! (I know...I act like a baby sometimes). I slammed the door and headed towards the convenient store thinking "the heck with it! I'm gonna get cigarettes & beer because I deserve it!"

A little voice told me to call my AA sponsor so I did. I told her I wanted to drink really bad & could she please tell me why that would be a really bad idea? After about 20 minutes & 100 reasons she gave me, I didn't want to drink anymore. In fact I think I am gonna apologize to my husband now.

Thank God for the support of you guys, my sponsor & AA. There would be no hope with out all of you!!!

Today has NOT been graceful but I think it's safe to say I will stay sober for another day.

Anyone else in a funk?

SwimKim12

Hi Kiki, I'm glad you didn't drink! That is a great example of why support is so critical in recovery. I'm so glad you called your sponsor! I'm sorry you are struggling but thank you for sharing. That helps me.

Dee74

I'm really glad you turned this around Kiki - awesome stuff

Hi Enfin - I'm trying to find the gentlest way to say this....but wouldn't what happened a few weeks ago be way worse for your reputation than going to AA?

D


D

Keepnitreal

Kiki I'm so glad you pulled through! Great job.

tatersalad

Hey everybody been a while since ive checked in. Im proud to say ive still not touched a drink since nov 28. ( almost a month) but man the holidays have been brutal!
Just wanted tto say Thank you for the support and dont give in to those who may be struggling the holidays as well

Dee74

way to go tatersalad

D

ultradad

Wow, only gone two days and so much has happen here! Sorry to hear about your struggle Enfin, but glad you're still here!
KiKi, way to stick with your instincts and call your sponsor! Sorry to read about all the struggles everyone is having, you're not alone.

Our camping/hiking trip was wonderful and just what I needed. Had some crazy, wild and scary moments with the AV, but also had some amazing breakthroughs. A lot of undisturbed time for my wife and I to talk and seemed to really make some progress with our relationship. I'll try and share more about the weekend later, but really looking forward to sleeping in my own bed tonight so headed that way!

paul37

I hope you all enjoyed Christmas and that you are all well.

The last four weeks has really changed how I am going to live the rest of my life. I rest properly now and I can sense my thinking getting clearer daily. I have been taking multi vitamins for the last few days and they have really made a difference to the way I feel.

Wish you all well and all the best for 2016!

patricia68

I sense my thinking getting clearer too. And it feels amazing

I spent the afternoon reflecting. I googled a few words: divorce, verbal abuse, child custody, etc Words that used to terrify me but not anymore.

I read a lot. Paid attention to my gut feeling. Wrote down a few phone numbers.

I am not making any decisions right now. Unless things get out of control I am staying put. But I wanted to know what options do I have. Which tools to work with. And there are many. There's light at the end of the tunnel. There's hope. There are lots of risks too. But I feel good, I feel empowered. I am not terrified anymore

KiKi0615

Dee, SwimKim, KIR & Ultradad-thanks for the kind words and continued support. Today showed me that my disease is alive & waiting and I need to stay one step ahead of it! Some things I need to try to avoid are anger, resentments & self-loathing. I realized that today!

My sponsor told me that no one can "make" me drink. She said that if I drink it is because "I" CHOSE to regardless of the reason. She said it would not be anyone's fault but my own. I believe her. She's a good sponsor. She's not pushy & she loves me unconditionally & believes in me even when I don't believe in myself. She's a blessing.

@Tatersalad-GREAT to hear from you! I'm so glad you are doing well!!!

@Ultradad-I'm glad you enjoyed your camping trip & got to talk to your wife. :-) I'm also glad you had some breakthroughs.

@Paul-you are doing amazing!!! Keep it up! :-)

@Patricia-good for you for taking your power back! I can't even express how fantastic I think you are doing. You truly give me hope! I say to myself "If Patricia can do it, I can do it!" :-)

Day 44 here I come!

SwimKim12

Patricia, Tatersalad, Paul, Kiki, Ultradad I'm glad you are well! You guys inspire me. I'm glad we're in this together!

Earlier today I had posted that I still needed to talk to my mom about my drinking over the last few months and ask for her support about going to a psychiatrist. I struggled with that all day and finally decided I would call her later in the week and tell her on the phone. As I was leaving my parents' house tonight I had said goodbye to my mom and she went back inside the house (because it was so cold out), but my dad was still outside and I thanked him for helping me update my computer and get my new iphone set up (I am not good with technology!). He said he was glad to help, but then said that when he was shutting down my computer (during the upgrade) he found notes that were open (which I subconsciously had left open) that were posts I made on SR after slips I had over the last few months. My dad is an alcoholic (sober for 15+ years) and said he wanted me to know that I could call him whenever I needed support and that he knows what I'm going through and will always support me.

I'm so grateful to have his support - I think this was an occurrence of "divine intervention" for sure! I must have a guardian angel (or ten!) watching over me that have kept me safe through all the drunken messes I've caused.

Also, I know we just got through Christmas, but New Year's is just around the corner...I'm working a full day New Year's Eve and I actually want to check out an AA meeting that evening. I think it will be a good way to ring in the new year! What do you guys have planned?

Take care, everyone!

RedAndy

Hi all, checking in as I've not been on for a day or two.

Still going and things ok, spent the afternoon out yesterday after a few days indoors, with the family and grandparents for a walk / coffee / war museum and a few shops, good afternoon and said to the wife what a change that was from the norm - day off at Christmas selfish me would have been moody at being dragged out not being allowed to sit getting drunk and having to do something of no interest to me, well it was interesting and I enjoyed it.

I did however then go into a petulant sulk when we got home and the wife was pouring herself a beer, just felt a mood come over me for no reason, stood there thinking oh sod this why don't I just have one - I didn't thankfully, I poured a sparkling water with lime instead, ate a big meal then watched tv before falling asleep on the settee.

Enfin, agree that your 26 days are definitely something to build on - your description of how there was nothing gained and no buzz from those drinks you took should also help - they have helped me - back on and away you go - you can do it ;-)

I'm out today at the football - was originally a big day on the ale when planned as football has always been for me - where it all started 30 years ago - however I'm taking the FIL & BIL so not somethin I can duck out of, instead I'm driving - company tickets so a meal booked pre match, plenty of drinking around and not sure I really want to be there but as I say with driving it won't be an issue (at least I'm trying to connive myself it won't but after last nights sulk and having got like that a couple of times now around it I'm not sure I will be the most fun to be around, just comes over me and I can't seem to snap out of it) - feeling pretty low whilst typing this already - if I could get out of it I would. Telling myself I'm going for food and football - that's all.

Have a good day all - will check in again later.

learntofly

Hey guys! Kiki, I'm still here, just haven't posted in a bit. Today is day 64 for me. Christmas was great! Lots of food, family, and laughs. I'm so grateful to not wake up with a hangover! I have absolutely no plans for New Years. I think I'm just going to stay home with my hubby and watch movies, because New Years has always been a crazy party time for me so I'm trying to avoid any possible relapses! I've been a bit cranky lately though, and my AV is mad that I can't go out and have fun like everyone else. I have to keep reminding myself of how horrible drinking made me feel! I hope that you're all hanging in there. I think about you guys all the time, and I'm grateful for all of you!