Class of October 2014 Part 19
02.27.15 :): ▽VII△VIII
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,802
You're doing great Arbor. Don't think too far ahead, and communicate with your family about what you need right now. If the anxiety continues to be a problem, see your doctor. They put me on Neurontin my first day of rehab, and it helped right away. Sometimes you need something else to curb the anxiety, it was brutal for me, easily my #1 trigger.
Awesome pics Phoebe! I'm glad you had a good time. I know what you mean about sober evenings seeming dull, but it's a small sacrifice for the awesome days that follow.
Still no word from my mom. My brother is on his way to her house right now to look for her. His own place is intact except for some electrical stuff and irrigation lines. The fire came within 10 feet of his house. I can't believe how lucky he was.
And we still have a zoo in our backyard. They can't take the animals back (or stay there themselves) because the smoke and ash will damage their lungs. Some neighbors have definitely noticed, but we explained the situation and they are very understanding. This is definitely the most bizarre situation they've seen around her in...possibly ever.
Awesome pics Phoebe! I'm glad you had a good time. I know what you mean about sober evenings seeming dull, but it's a small sacrifice for the awesome days that follow.
Still no word from my mom. My brother is on his way to her house right now to look for her. His own place is intact except for some electrical stuff and irrigation lines. The fire came within 10 feet of his house. I can't believe how lucky he was.
And we still have a zoo in our backyard. They can't take the animals back (or stay there themselves) because the smoke and ash will damage their lungs. Some neighbors have definitely noticed, but we explained the situation and they are very understanding. This is definitely the most bizarre situation they've seen around her in...possibly ever.
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
How wonderful you can accommodate the animals, Briar! I bet it's a blast for your dd, and she is learning a lifelong lesson in helping family. I feel I taught that to my kids by taking in my aunt. She was not an easy houseguest, but it's just what you do for loved ones and family.
BD, puppy was humble, wiggly and belly up. So far he is not a jumper, but goes submissive, and looks for me to come to him. He has begun to be that way whe he sees other dogs too. Goes to the ground and watches and waits. I think he is learning to assess situations as opposed to barreling into them, as was his initial nature. He did have loads of potty issues while mommy was out of town. Life was a bit crazy and off routine with MamaBear gone, lol.
Glad I got a chance to take a trip! This was my second time ever away with friends since having children. And, there has only been one night away with hubby. We just don't have local people to take both kids to ever get away. In laws are to far. So, it was a real treat to get away!
BD, puppy was humble, wiggly and belly up. So far he is not a jumper, but goes submissive, and looks for me to come to him. He has begun to be that way whe he sees other dogs too. Goes to the ground and watches and waits. I think he is learning to assess situations as opposed to barreling into them, as was his initial nature. He did have loads of potty issues while mommy was out of town. Life was a bit crazy and off routine with MamaBear gone, lol.
Glad I got a chance to take a trip! This was my second time ever away with friends since having children. And, there has only been one night away with hubby. We just don't have local people to take both kids to ever get away. In laws are to far. So, it was a real treat to get away!
02.27.15 :): ▽VII△VIII
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,802
My brother managed to get back in and found my mom at her house wondering why everyone was so worried. That woman, I swear. I'm just glad she's safe.
And we had to pen up the horse behind the garage because he kept trying to mount the BBQ grill.
And we had to pen up the horse behind the garage because he kept trying to mount the BBQ grill.
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 673
A Mom who lost her son to a drug OD sent me a link to this https://www.facingaddiction.org/
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Glad you checked in V. I have been out of town and wondered if I missed something. I was worried about you. I hope you are feeling better soon.
I caught a cold. Guessing on the plane on my way to Chicago, because it began2-3 days in. I feel lousy today, but it did not get bad enough to ruin the trip. I think I can rest today once I get the kids off to school.
House is a mess, groceries to get, and a sweet 16 birthday cake to make for my daughter!! Her bday is tomorrow.
. Party Saturday. Just 8 of her friends. But we will have her dinner choice and cake tomorrow as a family. I have a couple of gifts for her. The dog was sort of a gift for her. She has wanted one forever.
So, going to try to will myself, and nurse myself into top form by the end of the week.
I caught a cold. Guessing on the plane on my way to Chicago, because it began2-3 days in. I feel lousy today, but it did not get bad enough to ruin the trip. I think I can rest today once I get the kids off to school.
House is a mess, groceries to get, and a sweet 16 birthday cake to make for my daughter!! Her bday is tomorrow.
. Party Saturday. Just 8 of her friends. But we will have her dinner choice and cake tomorrow as a family. I have a couple of gifts for her. The dog was sort of a gift for her. She has wanted one forever.So, going to try to will myself, and nurse myself into top form by the end of the week.
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Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 3,805
Good to see you V. Get well soon!
I never get to watch World News on TV but I caught it last night. The footage of the fires in California is unreal. Stay safe Briar. My thoughts go out to all that lost their homes.
I never get to watch World News on TV but I caught it last night. The footage of the fires in California is unreal. Stay safe Briar. My thoughts go out to all that lost their homes.
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6,831
Hi gang, just rolling in from a sponsored dinner meeting. I was the only one out of nine not drinking before , during, and after the meal/presentation. Briefly wanted to drink when asked my preference from the bar, but stuck with seltzer and lime. I noticed one guy had four mixed drinks within an hour. Anyway, I took care of the business at hand and was first to leave. It was fun listening to the chatter for a while but not so much as the evening went on.
I'm not often surrounded by booze anymore and it is still mentally tiring. My sympathies to any of you that deal with it frequently.
I'm not often surrounded by booze anymore and it is still mentally tiring. My sympathies to any of you that deal with it frequently.
02.27.15 :): ▽VII△VIII
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,802
Great job Mark. I have found that it does get easier in most situations like that.
My brother and his girlfriend left today. They will stay with her family now who are back in their home. They found a proper stable for the horse. Their house isn't really livable at this point as there's no electricity or water, but he wants to get started fixing things, and it's not feasible for them to live with me while he does that, I live an hour away.
Still, I'm having some very weird feelings today. I've never experienced anything like this, and I'm afraid for him even though the fire has left. I guess it's a little empty nest syndrome, looking around my house with virtually no trace that he was ever here. Everything here suddenly went back to normal, and it's a difficult adjustment after days of being on high alert. It was eerie and unreal like "did that really happen?" I had to reconstruct what was going on in my normal life before it got turned upside down.
I remember sitting on the couch, checking the news on my phone, seeing the alert about the fire, calling my brother and saying "what the F is going on?!" And at that moment my life changed dramatically. There was such an intense mix of fear, confusion, anger, relief, horror, grief. And our schedule was a mess. We ate and slept at odd times (my primary job was being mom to everyone to make sure they ate, slept, showered, changed their clothes, they couldn't keep track of that stuff), I haven't gone to work the past two days, I've taken my daughter to school but at unusual times. It's been a whole different bizarre world, and then boom they're gone and it's over and I look around and it's my old life again, but I still feel different. It's so disorienting.
I can't wrap my head around what has happened. So much of what I know is gone. The small town I grew up in. Houses my dad built (he was the local carpenter). So many people I know displaced. My brother is having some terrible surviver's guilt because his house is still standing while so many of his friends lost everything. He's already out trying to help them, but realistically there's so little he can do.
I keep trying to imagine what it must have been like. My brother says the wind created by the fire was so strong it ripped shingles off his roof and threw a 150 lb piece of equipment 30 feet. He said they left in the afternoon and it was dark as night except for a red glow everywhere. I mean, it must have been like the end of the world.
And with our mother being so elusive, we were terrified for her. My brother took her a cell phone, so now we are in touch again, and it's hard to hear how shocked she is as she tells me about all the people she knows who lost everything. It's crushing to sense the powerlessness everyone is feeling.
At least one person is confirmed dead, but they haven't begun searching burned houses for more yet. They are sure there will be more. Many people are unaccounted for. And there was also a great deal of livestock in that area that could not be saved. It's horrible.
I can't reconcile all this with my quiet house and the prospect of getting up and going to work tomorrow like everything's right back the way it was. It's not. Everything feels surreal, the same but so different. I can't work this into or out of my reality.
My brother and his girlfriend left today. They will stay with her family now who are back in their home. They found a proper stable for the horse. Their house isn't really livable at this point as there's no electricity or water, but he wants to get started fixing things, and it's not feasible for them to live with me while he does that, I live an hour away.
Still, I'm having some very weird feelings today. I've never experienced anything like this, and I'm afraid for him even though the fire has left. I guess it's a little empty nest syndrome, looking around my house with virtually no trace that he was ever here. Everything here suddenly went back to normal, and it's a difficult adjustment after days of being on high alert. It was eerie and unreal like "did that really happen?" I had to reconstruct what was going on in my normal life before it got turned upside down.
I remember sitting on the couch, checking the news on my phone, seeing the alert about the fire, calling my brother and saying "what the F is going on?!" And at that moment my life changed dramatically. There was such an intense mix of fear, confusion, anger, relief, horror, grief. And our schedule was a mess. We ate and slept at odd times (my primary job was being mom to everyone to make sure they ate, slept, showered, changed their clothes, they couldn't keep track of that stuff), I haven't gone to work the past two days, I've taken my daughter to school but at unusual times. It's been a whole different bizarre world, and then boom they're gone and it's over and I look around and it's my old life again, but I still feel different. It's so disorienting.
I can't wrap my head around what has happened. So much of what I know is gone. The small town I grew up in. Houses my dad built (he was the local carpenter). So many people I know displaced. My brother is having some terrible surviver's guilt because his house is still standing while so many of his friends lost everything. He's already out trying to help them, but realistically there's so little he can do.
I keep trying to imagine what it must have been like. My brother says the wind created by the fire was so strong it ripped shingles off his roof and threw a 150 lb piece of equipment 30 feet. He said they left in the afternoon and it was dark as night except for a red glow everywhere. I mean, it must have been like the end of the world.
And with our mother being so elusive, we were terrified for her. My brother took her a cell phone, so now we are in touch again, and it's hard to hear how shocked she is as she tells me about all the people she knows who lost everything. It's crushing to sense the powerlessness everyone is feeling.
At least one person is confirmed dead, but they haven't begun searching burned houses for more yet. They are sure there will be more. Many people are unaccounted for. And there was also a great deal of livestock in that area that could not be saved. It's horrible.
I can't reconcile all this with my quiet house and the prospect of getting up and going to work tomorrow like everything's right back the way it was. It's not. Everything feels surreal, the same but so different. I can't work this into or out of my reality.
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,444
I think natural disasters like that really do unsettle us Briar.
I remember after we had a huge flood here, even tho I myself was unaffected directly, a lot of my friends were and the places I remembered changed forever.
it took me a couple of weeks to decompress. I think it's normal.
D
I remember after we had a huge flood here, even tho I myself was unaffected directly, a lot of my friends were and the places I remembered changed forever.
it took me a couple of weeks to decompress. I think it's normal.
D
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Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6,831
Similar feelings after Katrina around here. To see the fragility of our lives exposed and dealing with the aftermath makes it difficult to go back to 'normal' because our priorities get shuffled dramatically. It also brings a sense of vulnerability that's unsettling and ominous. In my 49 years I've felt that way twice......after the attacks of 9-11 and after Hurricane Katrina. Our life styles are truly more fragile than most may believe imo. A few days back into your normal routine and things should start feeling better Briar. I'm so glad your family is ok.
Wishing all a nice day.....gym time.
Wishing all a nice day.....gym time.
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Yeah, 9-11 changed life here. A few parents in our town died on the flights, and many throughout the general Boston area. It is a surreal experience, Briar, such disaster, and this has touched so close to many you know, and is close to your own home.
These things give one a new perspective on what really matters in life.
Having a nice day, all about dd, who turned 16 today. Just had her favorite dinner, and waiting to get an appetite for cake. She will open presents soon. She wanted a fondue pot. She will use it for chocolate fondue. May be a good birthday party activity. I got a game for son to give her, and she got a new bike earlier this summer. Lucky girl! Oh, and PUPPY! That was for all of us, but she wanted it the most.
Fun day.
These things give one a new perspective on what really matters in life.
Having a nice day, all about dd, who turned 16 today. Just had her favorite dinner, and waiting to get an appetite for cake. She will open presents soon. She wanted a fondue pot. She will use it for chocolate fondue.
May be a good birthday party activity. I got a game for son to give her, and she got a new bike earlier this summer. Lucky girl! Oh, and PUPPY! That was for all of us, but she wanted it the most. Fun day.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,874
Originally Posted by phoebe64 
Yeah, 9-11 changed life here. A few parents in our town died on the flights, and many throughout the general Boston area. It is a surreal experience, Briar, such disaster, and this has touched so close to many you know, and is close to your own home.
These things give one a new perspective on what really matters in life.
Having a nice day, all about dd, who turned 16 today. Just had her favorite dinner, and waiting to get an appetite for cake. She will open presents soon. She wanted a fondue pot. She will use it for chocolate fondue. May be a good birthday party activity. I got a game for son to give her, and she got a new bike earlier this summer. Lucky girl! Oh, and PUPPY! That was for all of us, but she wanted it the most.
Fun day.
These things give one a new perspective on what really matters in life.
Having a nice day, all about dd, who turned 16 today. Just had her favorite dinner, and waiting to get an appetite for cake. She will open presents soon. She wanted a fondue pot. She will use it for chocolate fondue.
May be a good birthday party activity. I got a game for son to give her, and she got a new bike earlier this summer. Lucky girl! Oh, and PUPPY! That was for all of us, but she wanted it the most. Fun day.
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