Viperidae

Welcome Live4luv!! Stick around. We'd love to have you here.

AGAGONNHOJ

5 weeks - Boom!

Copper442

Way to go, Johnno!!

CaseyW

Congrats on 35 days, AGAG!

chanty

Sandy, I also drank last night. I was doing so well too. Feel like a real failure, and wondering if I will ever be able to break this cycle. I am so sick of this battle in my head. Wasn't strong enough yesterday. See you in the June class.

Cissy

Chanty, me too. Sandy, Chanty and I have done the naughty. Fact is, I'm not even going to say I'll join the June class cause in my current state of mind, I'm not done with June indiscretions. When I'm moved into the other apartment and I have seen that I can indeed live through it, I'll begin again. So, expect to see me in the July class.

I drank beer yesterday and I'm drinking more today. I don't plan to drink again for maybe a week after today cause I simply can't afford to spend roughly $10/day on booze. That was my main reason for wanting to quit in the first place. I am destitute. I don't drink to the point of making myself sick and I don't drink to get drunk. I like to ride the line that resides in between having none and having too much.

So, there it is. Those of you who caved and are diving back in, be strong and best of success to you. I will give it the old college try again in July. God bless each of you to continue to do well. I'll be okay. I promise.

chanty

Oh Cissy, what is it with us? Please reconsider and join the June class, July is so far away. Don't drink today, be strong with us. You can do it. Hugs x

Dee74

This is pure AV here, Cissy.

The fact is you don't know for sure what might happen to you for the rest of this month if you keep drinking.

I've gone without food to continue drinking, I've had accidents, and gotten myself into many fixes and drams simply by 'not being ready to quit'

I can't count the number of times I said I'll quit after this event, and then kept drinking.

Moving is stressful but moving while drinking is horrendous.

Stop letting your addiction lay the rules down. That's your job.

You can do this, sober - a part of you must want that or you wouldn't be here

D

Dee74

congrats on 5 week Agagonnhoj
welcome back Chanty

D

CaseyW

Chanty -- sorry you chose to drink but am glad you are right back in. While I can understand joining the June class, I also hope you'll stick with us too. We're all still at the very beginning of our recovery, May or June start date aside. Either way I hope you'll think on what you could have done differently yesterday that might have kept you from drinking yesterday and make it a permanent part of your sobriety toolbox.

Cissy -- Also sorry you decided to drink and hope you'll stay with us too. It's too difficult for me to search thru your old posts on this crappy 3g phone connection but I know you've talked a number of times before about some of the behaviors that you've been ashamed of because of your drinking, so I don't 100% buy the whole thing about your main reason to quit being financial. And drinking sure as heck isn't going to make your move any easier.

I hope you'll think it over and change your mind about leaving us. Like Dee said, you have no way of knowing what might happen between now and July. Plus I sincerely look forward to each and every contribution you've made to my own recovery. You're a good woman who is on the right track to leading a happier life. Let yesterday be a simple detour on your path.

Either way we'll be here. Wishing you all the best and remember today is as good a day as any to start a new way of life.

live4luv

Thank you CaseyW, I'm doing pretty well other than feeling a little tired, so I'm just trying not to over do it. I have been getting in some walks though & light housework.

Also I have had ice cream several nights..... sugar cravings. I had better not make that a habit, my waistline cannot afford it

TENtx

C'mon, guys. You know better than this.

You are all forgiven for all past sins if you just get after it now.

Find your z and let's do this.

CaseyW

live4luv--I've also been bitten by the ice cream bug. Just finished a big old bowl of classic vanilla with chocolate syrup with my nine year old nephew. I'm not worrying about the waistline issue too much yet. Ice cream is a million times better for my body and mind than the alcohol poison I was pouring down my throat for years.

We've got a great group here. Hope you'll chime in often and I look forward to getting to know you!

CaseyW

I missed this line from your post the first time I read it:

I like to ride that line too. Unfortunately I'm an alcoholic so once I take that first drink I never know if I'm "only" going to have one or two more drinks (most nights) or if I'm going to drink everything in sight and then think I need to go out for more (happened way too often to just dismiss as anomalies.)

And I have to think you wouldn't have searched out this message board and then gone to the trouble of joining and then contributing to it hundreds of times if you didn't also have trouble riding that same line.

Once again, I hope your change your mind. I'm worried about you and will miss you.

4thekidz

I used to think the enemy of sobriety was stress; I was wrong.

It's boredom.

If I ever drink again (and I pray I don't) it'll be because I'm bored out of my mind.

This from a guy who holds a pilot's license, SCUBA certification, goes on mission trips to third world countries, and has an endless amount of hobbies including distance running, target shooting, and karate.

Go figure. I'm bored as hell.

AllieKat

Thanks for all of your kind words and encouragement. I think I feel better for the time being. Still anxious but not thinking about drinking. Went out for dinner with a sober friend and now I'm watching a movie and feeding my Candy Crush addiction. Lol.

Wishing everyone the best. It sounds like some of us (myself included) have hit a rough path.

And Casey, thank you again for being our rock. I have to admit you sound like you've been an addiction counselor for 20 years. :-) maybe that is your calling in life.

AllieKat

Boredom is a big trigger for me too. Hence the Candy Crush addiction. Haha! Keeps my mind occupied.

site1Q84

Dangit! I thought for sure it was Tuesday and logged in to check out the chat meeting, all proud of myself for remembering with the time change and being on vacation. Turns out it's definitely not Tuesday. I'm having so much fun I actually lost a day! And sober! Used to happen all the time when I was drinking, but I didn't expect this!

As per usual, once I take a minute I can see good in most situations these days. Nothing I can do to change that, but I can take the half hour I would have been in the chat to catch up on this thread instead. I can definitely see my thought process changing... and for the better

Cissy and Chanty, sorry to hear you drank, but the past is the past. Time to move on and learn from what happened. I hope you both keep checking in with the May class! We would definitely miss you around here.

CaseyW

4thekidz-- maybe you can combine some of your hobbies in new and exciting ways? Just off the top of my head, how about SCUBA Karate???

Seriously though, boredom is a huge trigger for me too. Drinking was my primary form of recreation for many years, whether it was in bars or home alone. I need to be thinking now while I'm not bored of things to do to alleviate this trigger when it does become an issue. SCUBA Karate is probably not an option for me.

Maybe just for tonight you could go to the Newcomers board here and welcome everyone new on the first page. It has worked for me so far. Keeps me out of my own head and can be a help to others as well.

CaseyW

Thank you for the kind words but I've got a whole whole whole lot of work to do on myself. I'm not anywhere close to being my own or anyone else's rock.

But I do have 13 years of being around others who were worried about my drinking. Maybe I was listening more than I thought I was at the time and it's finally starting to show.