One Year & Under Club Part 30
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,183
Courage, sorry you are feeling down.
JOKE FOR COURAGE:
Guy sitting in living room chair and hears...KNOCK-KNOCK.
Goes over, opens the door and doesn't see anyone. Then looks down and sees a snail. Reached down and picked it up and throws it.
FAST FORWARD TWO YEARS.
Same guy, same chair, same KNOCK-KNOCK
Heads over opens door, this time looks down and see the snail. The snail looks up and says, "He buddy, :WHAT THE F WAS THAT ABOUT"
(Laughter follows)
JOKE FOR COURAGE:
Guy sitting in living room chair and hears...KNOCK-KNOCK.
Goes over, opens the door and doesn't see anyone. Then looks down and sees a snail. Reached down and picked it up and throws it.
FAST FORWARD TWO YEARS.
Same guy, same chair, same KNOCK-KNOCK
Heads over opens door, this time looks down and see the snail. The snail looks up and says, "He buddy, :WHAT THE F WAS THAT ABOUT"
(Laughter follows)
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,171
What do you get if you cross an elephant with a peanut butter sandwich?
A peanut butter sandwich that never forgets and an elephant that sticks to the roof of your mouth!
My grandson do current fav what is silver and lies in the grass? R2 DooDoo and finally my new favourite of my grandsons what do an eagle and a lion have in common?
They both have wings.-'except the lion.
Now go eat! Have a phillycheesesteak.
Gilmer you did wicked awesome on the mark sweetie! I am so proud to claim you as 'my clever friend who learnt Hebrew' I bask in your reflected glory. I can barely speak English and it is my native tongue!
Carlos, if BeFree was walking through your dreams last night she'd need to wash her feet- that is one mucky mind you have there!!
A peanut butter sandwich that never forgets and an elephant that sticks to the roof of your mouth!
My grandson do current fav what is silver and lies in the grass? R2 DooDoo and finally my new favourite of my grandsons what do an eagle and a lion have in common?
They both have wings.-'except the lion.
Now go eat! Have a phillycheesesteak.
Gilmer you did wicked awesome on the mark sweetie! I am so proud to claim you as 'my clever friend who learnt Hebrew' I bask in your reflected glory. I can barely speak English and it is my native tongue!
Carlos, if BeFree was walking through your dreams last night she'd need to wash her feet- that is one mucky mind you have there!!
No quitting on yer quit eh!
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 3,882
WOW, I sure hope Tigerlili is quicker on the draw than me, this thread moves faster than a fox in a forest fire! First, sounds like lot's of sickness going around, I quit typing with my fingers and started using the stylus instead lol Hope everyone starts feeling better soon...
Carlos.... when I golfed, my buddy and I loved to get out early in the morning when the smells were fresh, air was brisk, dew on the greens gave "rooster tails" behind the ball as it found it's way to the cup! Then too many 19th holes started happening so I had to call it quits.... maybe one day I'll swing the club again....
Toots, it's our daughter who's in DC getting her Master's in Forensic Psychology, maybe I should tell her about SR, she could log in and diagnose us all lol
Courage, I don't have any jokes that would make it past the censors, but food?? A huge plate of ketchup smothered homemade poutine, followed by one of those huge solid milk chocolate Easter Bunny's
I'll slowly catch up on the other undies and their stories and will be able to have a bit more informed input...
Carlos.... when I golfed, my buddy and I loved to get out early in the morning when the smells were fresh, air was brisk, dew on the greens gave "rooster tails" behind the ball as it found it's way to the cup! Then too many 19th holes started happening so I had to call it quits.... maybe one day I'll swing the club again....
Toots, it's our daughter who's in DC getting her Master's in Forensic Psychology, maybe I should tell her about SR, she could log in and diagnose us all lol
Courage, I don't have any jokes that would make it past the censors, but food?? A huge plate of ketchup smothered homemade poutine, followed by one of those huge solid milk chocolate Easter Bunny's
I'll slowly catch up on the other undies and their stories and will be able to have a bit more informed input...
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,049
"What was Helen Keller's favorite color?"
Corduroy.
After feeling sorry for myself most of the last couple of days, I finally ate something and called my husband. The jokes helped, too. Thanks!
Gilmer, congratulations on the grade! I think it's fabulous that you're in school, and the work that you're doing sounds very challenging.
Corduroy.
After feeling sorry for myself most of the last couple of days, I finally ate something and called my husband. The jokes helped, too. Thanks!
Gilmer, congratulations on the grade! I think it's fabulous that you're in school, and the work that you're doing sounds very challenging.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: North. Where it snows.
Posts: 702
Welcome Tiger Lily. For me 3 months was easy. I did tons of 3 months sobriety stunts. It was the exact day after 3 months I found hard as I always went back to drinking. My 3 months were cleanses I thought. But after 1 year, I see the GREAT improvements sobriety has made in my life. They're invisible but undeniable. It's a small je ne sais quoi. 
DG, I hope the painting is going along as you want.
Courage. Courage. You seem to be doing OK? Apart from that dream that is probably trying to tell you that you don,t want to be depressed?
I hope everyone will recover from their colds. I had the beginning of one but I crunch on a big raw piece of ginger and it kills any bugs within 24 hours. It's an amazing antibacterial but one must do it just a bit before the cold settles.
Have a great week-end everyone.
It's my birthday on Sunday. My second sober birthday. Very proud of that.
Dottie P.
xoxox
DG, I hope the painting is going along as you want.
Courage. Courage. You seem to be doing OK? Apart from that dream that is probably trying to tell you that you don,t want to be depressed?
I hope everyone will recover from their colds. I had the beginning of one but I crunch on a big raw piece of ginger and it kills any bugs within 24 hours. It's an amazing antibacterial but one must do it just a bit before the cold settles.
Have a great week-end everyone.
It's my birthday on Sunday.
My second sober birthday. Very proud of that. Dottie P.
xoxox
Member
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: North. Where it snows.
Posts: 702
Oh Courage, corduroy. ha ha ha .
I hadn't seen the post where you mentioned feeling down. We're here for you.
I'm really happy that you're so much more open than when you first arrived. You are open with your feelings and that is truly the beginning of real sobriety. Trust and honesty.
I hope you're feeling better.
Gillmer, congrats on your A, minus or not.
DP
xx
I hadn't seen the post where you mentioned feeling down. We're here for you.
I'm really happy that you're so much more open than when you first arrived. You are open with your feelings and that is truly the beginning of real sobriety. Trust and honesty.
I hope you're feeling better.
Gillmer, congrats on your A, minus or not.
DP
xx
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Thanks for the tip about the ginger, DP. That probably scorches the inside of your air passages so no germs can settle!
I'm not good with jokes, Courage, but there's a thread in Cafe Central called "The Lighter Side" that has some funny stuff. Scroll back to about a month ago. CaptainZing2000 and DanDare were the joke specialists.
I'm not good with jokes, Courage, but there's a thread in Cafe Central called "The Lighter Side" that has some funny stuff. Scroll back to about a month ago. CaptainZing2000 and DanDare were the joke specialists.
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Australia
Posts: 3,597
Thanks for the welcome folks. I have had a few years sobriety up before. I'm really feeling an urge to drink. I am thinking that the change of weather is a trigger. It's getting cooler here at night and this si when I'd settle down in front of the tv with my fav drink and relax (aka cry, throw up, pass out).
Having an early night (it's about 8.30pm here) and going to my home group in the morning.
Having an early night (it's about 8.30pm here) and going to my home group in the morning.
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,171
Stick close TL, and we will see you through the cravings. Seasonal changes can be a big trigger, it is the mental associations we make.
Gilmer, I need my daily dose of lighter side. Chuckle therapy.
Cowboy, wtf is poutine? It sounds like an Italian insult!!
Courage, glad you are feeling better x
Dottie, how are you doing?
Happy weekend all will check in later
Gilmer, I need my daily dose of lighter side. Chuckle therapy.
Cowboy, wtf is poutine? It sounds like an Italian insult!!
Courage, glad you are feeling better x
Dottie, how are you doing?
Happy weekend all will check in later
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: PA and Florida
Posts: 4,183
Happy Saturday, Undies:
TL, you got this!! AV is no match for a new Undie!!
BF, honestly, Toots has that all backwards (imagine that)
Happy pre birthday, Dottie.
You know Courage, I sent you my fav joke. It's pretty deep, so if anyone needs me to explain that joke in a bit more detail just let me know
ACB, I bet the courses in your neck of the woods are spectacular!! Funny, I rarely ever drank playing, way to competitive with buddies, but had some horrible 19th holes. Had a regular 4some when married for years we where first out every Sat morning. Geeze, could play 18, eat breakfast with them and be home for honey-doo's by 9:30 AM. Was great!
Enjoy the day...I sure plan to!!
Carlos xx
TL, you got this!! AV is no match for a new Undie!!
BF, honestly, Toots has that all backwards (imagine that)
Happy pre birthday, Dottie.
You know Courage, I sent you my fav joke. It's pretty deep, so if anyone needs me to explain that joke in a bit more detail just let me know
ACB, I bet the courses in your neck of the woods are spectacular!! Funny, I rarely ever drank playing, way to competitive with buddies, but had some horrible 19th holes. Had a regular 4some when married for years we where first out every Sat morning. Geeze, could play 18, eat breakfast with them and be home for honey-doo's by 9:30 AM. Was great!
Enjoy the day...I sure plan to!!
Carlos xx
No quitting on yer quit eh!
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Alberta, Canada
Posts: 3,882
Gilmer, congrats on the grade! Going for the Master's in anything must be difficult!!
TL, stick with these crazies, you can't help but get sober!
DP, a fellow Canadian surely knows what poutine is, or did I spell it wrong?
TL, stick with these crazies, you can't help but get sober!
DP, a fellow Canadian surely knows what poutine is, or did I spell it wrong?
p***enger
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: NYC
Posts: 19,049
You can get poutine in a NYC diner but they call it something different & I've never had it -- I only learned about it when I heard some of my students describing it as "good drunk food".
Carlos, I loved the joke. I don't know if I got the full depth of its profundity, but I love that you sent it to me when I was lonesome.
Tigerlily, triggers and urges are a pain, but in the end, if you want to be sober, you can beat them all. Good on you to get to a morning meeting -- I hope you seize the chance to share!
Carlos, I loved the joke. I don't know if I got the full depth of its profundity, but I love that you sent it to me when I was lonesome.
Tigerlily, triggers and urges are a pain, but in the end, if you want to be sober, you can beat them all. Good on you to get to a morning meeting -- I hope you seize the chance to share!
Living and Loving Life at Last
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: gods own country
Posts: 12,171
Im just gobsmacked that a Carlos joke is known for it profundity and not it's profanity!!
Carlos, you say it's your favourite, do you mean it's the only PG rated one you know???
Ok Cowboy, I can go cheesy fries any day, but what exactly is the gravy? See in my neck of the world gravy is purely the meat flavoured sauce you pour over your Sunday roast, here it seems to cover a lot of other stuff! Btw- my gravy? Wicked awesome- people have written songs about my gravy, kings have bowed to me.
As for drunk food, in the UK it has to be a kebab preferably from the shop that was shut down by the health department the week before but mysteriously reopened selling the very same meat. For some reason, it doesn't kill drunks, justs adds a fourth dimension to the hangover involving the toilet bowl and basin simultaneously. Oh I do miss a drunken Kebab.
Carlos, you say it's your favourite, do you mean it's the only PG rated one you know???
Ok Cowboy, I can go cheesy fries any day, but what exactly is the gravy? See in my neck of the world gravy is purely the meat flavoured sauce you pour over your Sunday roast, here it seems to cover a lot of other stuff! Btw- my gravy? Wicked awesome- people have written songs about my gravy, kings have bowed to me.
As for drunk food, in the UK it has to be a kebab preferably from the shop that was shut down by the health department the week before but mysteriously reopened selling the very same meat. For some reason, it doesn't kill drunks, justs adds a fourth dimension to the hangover involving the toilet bowl and basin simultaneously. Oh I do miss a drunken Kebab.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 5,439
DP- The painting went really well. I finished the room I was working on and it looks great! My eventual goal is to do the whole house, but I don't have time for that at the moment. Everything else is going well too. I feel happy and it's really satisfying doing things to make the house look better.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: CA
Posts: 2,977
Toots and Carlos you both crack me up!
&& Toots your totally right I would def rock some 120hole docks under my dress but I think my tattoos are enough to scare mom for now lol!!
Today the cold has like 95% vanished. The combo of detoxing/being sick had me waking up today feeling alive for the first time all week. I feel like I just completed some type of horrible boot camp. Coffee is going and music blasting, took my dog to the park for a walk and some soccer. I am feeling very positive today and enjoying just feeling healthy. And reminding myself that I never have to go thru that detox period again as long as I stay on a sober path. Every time i relapse and drink I let go of my love for music and then here I am back enjoying and loving every sec of it.
Have a great day undies!!
&& Toots your totally right I would def rock some 120hole docks under my dress but I think my tattoos are enough to scare mom for now lol!!
Today the cold has like 95% vanished. The combo of detoxing/being sick had me waking up today feeling alive for the first time all week. I feel like I just completed some type of horrible boot camp. Coffee is going and music blasting, took my dog to the park for a walk and some soccer. I am feeling very positive today and enjoying just feeling healthy. And reminding myself that I never have to go thru that detox period again as long as I stay on a sober path. Every time i relapse and drink I let go of my love for music and then here I am back enjoying and loving every sec of it.
Have a great day undies!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 3,958
Hi Undies
I am finally relaxing after a long, busy, draining week. I tend to blather on and on, but I have the abridged version to share about how I overcame a huge craving, TigerLili. I was sitting in my car, that wouldn't start, after a hockey meeting with folks who had been attacking my husband and I face to face and on social media. My nine year old was having an autistic meltdown in the back seat. I sat there, planning how I was going to buy, then drink, red wine. I was imagining the physical changes that happen after the first few drinks.....Then I remembered what I read on here on the subject of control, and I realized I had zero control over the things that were upsetting me, and I had to let my stress go. In my conscience I know I have behaved ethically and done the very best I can, and I let it go..... I didn't drink that night. I told myself that everything would be alright, just like I would tell my kids, and woke up to a fresh new day the next morning.
As I was reading everyone's posts it occurred to me that I was a lot wittier when I drank. I've always admired my sense of humor, although it is gallows and comes from a dark place. I've learned to be kind and gentle on myself in sobriety, and that I see it spilling into my interactions with people, which is a *good* thing, but feels unusual....
I miss being funny but enjoy my new lease on life. I'm seeing all the possibilities out there for me for the first time in a long while.
Have a great day, all!
I am finally relaxing after a long, busy, draining week. I tend to blather on and on, but I have the abridged version to share about how I overcame a huge craving, TigerLili. I was sitting in my car, that wouldn't start, after a hockey meeting with folks who had been attacking my husband and I face to face and on social media. My nine year old was having an autistic meltdown in the back seat. I sat there, planning how I was going to buy, then drink, red wine. I was imagining the physical changes that happen after the first few drinks.....Then I remembered what I read on here on the subject of control, and I realized I had zero control over the things that were upsetting me, and I had to let my stress go. In my conscience I know I have behaved ethically and done the very best I can, and I let it go..... I didn't drink that night. I told myself that everything would be alright, just like I would tell my kids, and woke up to a fresh new day the next morning.
As I was reading everyone's posts it occurred to me that I was a lot wittier when I drank. I've always admired my sense of humor, although it is gallows and comes from a dark place. I've learned to be kind and gentle on myself in sobriety, and that I see it spilling into my interactions with people, which is a *good* thing, but feels unusual....
I miss being funny but enjoy my new lease on life. I'm seeing all the possibilities out there for me for the first time in a long while.
Have a great day, all!
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