JL2013

SM,
I'm not far off at all from my last drink by comparison to some of our friends. I actually never noticed any withdrawal symptoms, until I would quit for a few weeks, drink for 2 days then quit for another few weeks. I now know that anxiety is a huge buildup for me, because drinking is a self medication thing to get away from worries. Don't know if that helps, but I never noticed "symptoms" until I began to really be aware of what it's like not to drink for 4 days in a row.

Welcome Pamel !

Driver1

Thanks WhoDey. 20/20 was interesting. Wish there had been a little more depth, yet it was nice piece. That takes a lot of courage, especially in that business.

My wife occasionally forgets my birthday. I just let her off the hook last year. On way out door, said, "don't forget to wish me happy birthday". With that reminder, plenty of refocused fun...great birthday!

QOTD: favorite band (or four).

Mine: 60s- Stones, 70s - Eagles, 80s - INXS, 90s - Collective Soul, 2000s -Train. That's a bit heavy on the classic rock which I grew up on with older sister and brother, but I will admit I'm also an unabashed pop rock fan. I got all kinds of time for Katy Perry, for instance. Whatever moves ya I suppose.

What's up with the Biebs? (train wreck out of control; he needs some guidance)

trudgingagain

Never was good with names of bands....hubby and one daughter always make fun of me....I like songs, as opposed to bands...but, I think I can come up with a few...Let's see....the Beatles (of course), Chicago, Eagles, Queen, some songs from Train, some songs from the Stones....I think that most of my favorites were from individuals....of the James Taylor, Carole King, Rod Stewart variety....it's a "chick thing"...lol....Had a great b-day! The massage was awesome....outside on the back patio with the waves crashing as background noise.....fettuccini alfredo with spinach, mushrooms and chicken...yum! Back to business today and dealing with the state of CA. IDIOTS! Got an e-mail from audit manager saying to get a list of required documents from a particular case rep, followed by another e-mail from the manager that said, "Bring everything you have". UGH! Doesn't she realize we are travelling???!!! What...we are supposed to "check" boxes of documents???? I tell ya, the right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing......onward!

HDrosebud

Just a note to say I am over 105 days now sober, still going strong consider alot of emotional ups and downs this past month.
I was sitting here this morning thinking of the changes I have made in the past six months. Friday the 13th of September of 2013 I got married in Hell, MI (yes there is such a place), then on October 13th I took my last drink, then in November 13th was the first day of exercising and watching my diet ( I have lost 15lbs). I am seriously thinking something not quite sure happen in December on the 13th but can't put my finger on it. I had this thing for the 13th in 2013, it seemed it was a good number for me..
Glad everyone is doing great..

Bilr44

Retreat update:

I ended up leaving the retreat last night because it was not for me. Being somewhat an introvert I was not into this particular scene. The presentation was way too overboard last night which drove me away. I mean, I believe in a higher power but do not need religion forced down my throat. This is probably great for extroverts who played team sports, but replace the ball with god. I don't mean to sound so negative about it but it was really not for me at all. This is probably the same reason I have stayed away from AA because I really don't like a big team approach to solving problems.

A big turnoff was the leaders trying to get everyone to sing and chant hallelujah at the top of their lungs. I guess I really should not have went because I did not want to go beforehand. I knew this was not even close to being in my comfort zone.

Bilr44

The 13th is a lucky day, my daughter was born on Friday September 13th.

SoberMarathon

Bands, pretty straightforward:

70s: Alice cooper, Kiss, Aerosmith
80s: Mötley Crüe, GNR, ACDC
90s: Nirvana, Pumpkins, Sound Garden
2000s: Coldplay, U2

SoberMarathon

Almost forgot the most important Canadian band of all-time (sorry Guess Who): RUSH!!

Bilr44

QOTD:

50's Chuck Berry
60's Bob Dylan/Beatles
70's Pink Floyd/Grateful Dead/Rush/Yes
80's Rush

LittleSparrow

I'm still here and still sober, just haven't had a chance to post. I'm many QOTDs behind! Here we go:

Favorite band: I'm going with Social Distortion, but I really love so much music. One day I'm listening to electronic dance music, the next I'm listening to gypsy jazz.

Where I'd like to be in a year: Sure about my career (nope, haven't decided on whether to go back to school, but my job might go better this year because recently there have been management changes), still sober (obviously), and making a positive difference in the world (don't know how yet).

Birth order: I have one younger brother (2 years younger than me). We used to fight constantly. I'm talking brutal fights, with punching, kicking, biting, pinching, etc. My brother and father both had awful tempers, and I don't remember childhood fondly---I spent most of my time hiding out in my bedroom. My mom would say, "You're going to be friends when you grow up, just like me and my sister," and we didn't believe it. Now as adults, we get along and he even came out to visit me for a few days. We're still not that close, but much better than when we were kids.

Trudging, happy belated birthday! I'm glad your day turned out well.

EternalQ

BLR I think you should be proud of yourself.
In my experience, trying new things sober is a big step whether it turns out you like it or not.
It's exposing yourself to the unknown and not drinking....
or being a beginner and not drinking... that counts.

Bilr44

Well, I almost felt like I needed a drink when I was there so that is also why I left. A guy sitting next to me said his family sent him there because he has a drinking problem. I swear that I smelled alcohol on him but I could be mistaken. Yeah, I tried it which is more than I would have done while drinking. I know when I am out of my comfort zone and this was it. I am not really religious so this was a bit of overkill. Had I gone a few months ago, I might have been more vulnerable, but I am pretty comfortable with sobriety as it is now. I don't really need any special things to help me. I am probably one of the few who has just stopped drinking with only SR as support. This is a terrific place though.

EternalQ

Actually BLR Many people have quit using SR primarily . I did.

Bilr44

Yeah I should have said "one of many" and not "one of the few". It's funny but 20 years ago it would have been difficult without AA, as this site has been a lifesaver for me. I really don't think I would be this far without everyone's help here. The drinking culture seems to have gotten a lot bigger, as advertising has. Luckily, sites like this, while they won't even the playing field, it will help get a lot of people on the straight and narrow. Also, with the younger texting generation getting older, this site will only benefit more people in the future.

DoubleDragons

I agree, Bilr, that SR is the perfect venue for a lot of people. I knew I needed support and people to bounce questions off of and I just needed people to really understand what I was going through. I did not know anyone who was sober and I still really don't, other than you wonderful Tobers. At the same time, I really dreaded the idea of AA. I think that was something that held me back from sobriety for a long time. I was afraid that if I wasn't able to quit drinking on my own I would have to go to AA or rehab and I would have a stigma attached to me. Now I certainly don't knock AA or rehab, but I am relieved that SR has worked for me. (24 hour access, tons of like minded people and I have always been more comfortable communicating my feelings through writing!) Anyway, whatever it takes to get to the sober life is a good thing because the sober life is a great life!

On bands: OMG! You would not believe how eclectic my taste in music is until you took a look at my IPOD. I love my collection of music. I span the gamut from Crystal Gale to Nickelback; Uppity Blues Women, Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, Johnny Cash, Barenaked Ladies, Lenny Kravitz, Maroon Five, Outkast, The Rolling Stones, Jimmy Buffet, Norah Jones and yoga chants. I, like Trudging, hear a song and I fall in love with it. I discovered Gnarls Barkley's "Crazy" before anyone else had ever heard of it. I swear. OMG! I don't have a favorite band but I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE listening to all different kinds of music. My IPOD is one of my most prized possessions.

I need to get back to even keel. I have been running myself ragged the last few days, physically and emotionally. My husband is the same way and he is getting sicker and sicker with the flu. I have been eating like crap, not exercising, and not sleeping well. While, amazingly, I have had no desire to drink, I know that if I don't get back on track health wise, I will become more vulnerable to "the quick fix." I have to remember to take it as it comes with this house decision. I need to stay connected to you guys here at SR.

Well, good night. I will check in tomorrow morning.

Driver1

so glad to hear from you HD, hope you are well.

Neil Peart fellas, nuff said!

For what it's worth DD, I think you are making the right move by taking your time with the house hunt. For me, buying a house has always been one of those - you just see and know it - kind of deals. With my last house, I hadn't even seen the inside before turning to my wife with "this is our house". And, it was/is. Good luck!

So Gasparilla was yesterday. It occurred to me sometime around 10AM that this would be when I'd start having inner battle regarding time to crack first beer.

Fast forward 18 hours (bout an hour ago; after feeding) could hear one of my tenants out back still kicking it around with some other festival goers. This would have been me. I was always the last one standing.

Most years this would lead to a jacked up Sunday trying to recover (unless I just powered on through and drank for all of Sunday). Either way, it would be topped off by a really crappy Monday at work trying to pull off a business as usual.

Man, what a monumental waste of time. Did that really seem like fun???????????

Have turned a corner on babies Tobers. Big has always been more chill than Little, but I think it clicked for him on Friday that these folks (me and DW) that are always handling him are there to soothe. Little got it yesterday...what a wonderous (and certainly rewarding) transformation played out right before our eyes (literally). Especially with her. She was always tense before feeding, after feeding, changing, whatever....seemed like she was always in the "on" position (not always crying, but just tense). Anyway, she gets it now. So cool to see her bones melt into me, DW, bed rather than ball of angst.

Had the babies on lock down yesterday. Surely to the dismay of many of our guests. But Gasparilla was not baby exhibition. We just wanted to keep our annual party going. My job is to protect babies and wife, not please people (right? wink, wink; yet I do really mean it).

Here is a picture of BAK (posted one last week of Little, must give equal billing!):

Bilr44

Driver, I never felt great in the morning at work, regardless of the day. I had to jack myself up on caffeine and tons of water. The worst days were like a gasparilla type of event where you drank even more and earlier than usual. Not only was I hung over, but tired that caffeine would not do a thing. The worst part, getting back on the saddle and drinking again that night. Giddy up horsey. I do not miss this one bit. Now caffeine does what it is supposed to do and I don't have to drown myself in water.

Babies are funny like that and they are getting to know you. They always have that special bond with mommy though. Hand them to a stranger today and they will get that tense feeling back.

Bilr44

DD, It is great that you recognize the triggers of needing a quick fix like not exercising, eating poorly, out of our comfort zone, etc. when we were actively drinking we never had the opportunity to be this in touch with our whole being. It is so refreshing to be in this much control and life is so much more enjoyable.

You sound like my wife and son with their iPod/music. She is happier when I buy her gadgety stuff like that then jewelry.

Take care of that sick husband of yours.

trudgingagain

Ohhhh....soooo remember going to work hungover...ugh...and at the time, I was teaching middle school students with special needs...yikes! Could barely keep my head off of the desk! So glad to feel great today Yes, coffee is doing what it is supposed to be doing....YAY! I remember when I gave birth to my second daughter....she was very nervous and shaky in the hospital. The docs actually ran drug tests on her! And nooooo, I was never a drug user and was sober during both of my pregnancies....I was shocked! Glad to hear the babes are settling in, Driver! I, too, am only using SR this time. I think it is great that we have options other than AA these days! Well, off to do more research on the tax man

JL2013

Joined a church today with my wife. Trying to make more connections with ppl for support. Done with being cut off and alone. First day back on EMS truck tomorrow. Life in the daylight is looking up !
BILR44 - I went to a mens conference about 12 yrs ago. All they talked about was porn addiction the whole first night. Freaked me out and I didn't go back on Saturday. I can totally agree with exiting stage left, when it goes too far.
Hope everyone has a good day.