Fitness1234

O yes i will! Past twelve days I feel better than I have in years

Mrbeagle

Well just about day 3 already, i'm officially back on track. Good night those of you in these European parts, and have a nice evening if you're from over the pond

Easyrider

Checking in. I think I'm on 17 days. My poor (understatement) diet is catching up with me. I have no choice but to eat healthily, but it was fun while it lasted. Quit smoking date is coming up fast too. Sobriety is starting to feel normal and I'm able to do things I wouldn't have been able to whilst intoxicated. I'm more grateful each day for every sober day that passes. Keep up the good work gang. Night nights.

SistahSober

Wow! Day 9...trying to keep busy and keep my mind off of drinking has been easier than I thought! I saw a psychologist yesterday who told me he doesn't think I have a serious drinking problem but my drinking habits were definitely not healthy for anxiety. That almost made me want to immediately go get some wine but I'm no fool anxiety is a mutha so I'm not trying to go there based on his opinion...I know myself. My husband has even stopped drinking...during the week at least...it's a start!

Happy sober days classmates!

~SistahSober

PreciousKitty

That frustrates me that your doc told you that. I think only the person themselves knows if their an alcoholic.

If a doc had told me that, I probably would have dragged it on forever.

Go with your gut Sistah.

PreciousKitty

I can't keep up with your Avitar changes Mr.Beagle. J/K - The challenge is good for my brain.

Mrbeagle

Tell me about it Kitty! I couldn't find one I was happy with at all, maybe I will actually keep this one for a whole 24 hours!

Bedtime for me, stay strong all!

MSweeney

Awesome all around Sistah!!

Interesting about the medical opinion. I have had exactly the same advice from three separate medical professionals - GP, Psychiatrist, and Psychologist (Which is sounding like I'm a fruitcake!).

As I struggled through my own day 9 yesterday I was having exactly the same thoughts - "If these people don't see it as a problem then why am I putting myself through this?"

Anyway, here's to the start of day 10.

estone

Hello to all my February friends! Day 25 and counting! It feels like my hours are off from everyone else! When I am on here most of you all have posted and are in bed for the night! Oh well... I enjoy reading and catching up!

It's been a sad frustrating day for me. I was very busy at work which took my mind off of things but home life is kinda sucky! (Is that a word?) My hubby and I got into it yesterday right after work and we didn't talk to each other until I got home tonight. Now he's acting like nothing ever happened. (I think he's trying to make me crazy!) Anyway I'm just venting a bit. I'll feel better tomorrow. Any sober day is a good day right?!

Thanks all for listening...

estone

Hey sistah! I just want to say I think you are doing fantastic! I'd say if you think you have a problem then you do! Keep up the good work girl!

estone

Precious, Pamel, Melissa, Venus, sistahsober, Fitness, and Starbaby, You are all such strong awesome women! (And all the other incredible women on here...) I don't have very many female friends (mostly hung with my hubby and his buddies drinking beer in the garage... I know you're all jealous of my glamorous life right!) but I want to tell you how great it is to be part of this great group and to feel the friendship of all of you. Thanks so much for being here!

SistahSober

I feel so confused by the medical worlds. I was also told to wean my self from celexa by a psychiatrist because it was the alcohol causing the anxiety and I should be better in a while since I stopped drinking. I don't know what to do but I do know now that drinking isn't the answer I just want to feel "normal" again and I wish I had the answer to that! It's soooo exhausting.

Fitness1234

Sistah..It takes time to feel normal...It almost two weeks and I still get dizzy spells..ugh... working out relaly helps a lot...esp for anxiety. when I was drinking i had really bad anxiety. It has gone down a lot! just take it one day at a time. I freak out all the time about the future and then I say let me just focus on today. Estone---thank you for being here for us also! we all need each other. we are the only ones who understand what this disease can do to us

PreciousKitty

SUCKY is a word where I come from.

Estone thank you for the kind words on your other post. I got them at the perfect time.

I so don't feel strong tonight though.

I walked in from work to a bit of a mess. Not as bad as usual but I just cant stand a constant mess and always having to ask for people to help and assign tasks. I have never been able to make a chore chart and stick to it. Too many complaints and arguing.

My daughter made dinner which was real nice but I am just not in the mood to clean up the mess. And my feeling is, if she made dinner then someone else needs to clean up the mess.

My other daughter really can't with a broken foot. My 10 year old grandson never helps but I don't feel that is my fault. It's his mom's job to teach him these things. It would be more work to show him how than to just do it myself. My 21 year old son could/should and I will probably tell him there all his tonight. Just feel guilty because I already asked him to take out the garbage today.

Why is this so hard for me. I am aware it is NOT normal behavior. I am so ANGRY right now.

Now my daughter just got home with stuff to make chile verde for tomorrow. Really nice right? But another mess! She gets on these kicks sometimes.

My daughters agreed to spend Thursdays-Sundays at my other daughters house to give me a break! Can't they make the chile there tomorrow?

Gosh I am so ANGRY that I am bawling now! Is all I feel is GUILT! What kind of mom wouldn't want to have family dinners with her children and grandchildren? But every night?

It's just that I cooked wonderful family dinners for 25 plus years w/o much help from anyone. I was a regular Betty Crocker, and I loved it. I loved taking care of my children.

IF I could ever get a break I would love to make family dinners for my adult children on Sundays.

I would rather stay upstairs and starve tonight than go downstairs and eat and see a mess and craziness . But of coarse they would beg me to come and eat, and how am I making them feel by staying in my room and passing up a nice dinner my daughter made?

I feel so ungrateful.

Sorry so long. Thanks for listening.

Dee74

I don't think it's unreasonable to expect that people clean up PK...it's not ungrateful either to expect others to pull their weight...

I know some houses have a rule of the cook cooks and others clean up, but I don't think it's too much to at least wipe the benches down and wash off the plates and pans for washing up later

D

PreciousKitty

I think you have the key ingredient for now Sistah. No drinking! Lots of other ingredients to add, but I think we add them very slowly one at a time.

PreciousKitty

Estone, I am also very grateful to have your friendship and that of everyone here.

Thank you again for the praise tonight. I have steam coming out of my ears, but I also have your kind words in my head. It is helping me balance out my mood...

estone

Prescious you deserve to feel the feelings you have. It's OK! You need to let it out. I am struggling with the very same issues. Do you think that's what got us in this situation in the first place? That we would rather drink than deal with the issues at hand? My kids are lazy and spoiled rotten and when I ask for help they act like I'm beating them. I know I need to put my foot down but I'm like you... I don't want to hurt their feelings. (I'm always worried about hurting feelings!) In the end I'm the one with the hurt feelings. We have to learn how to stick up for ourselves. You hang in there. Sounds like we both need to have some difficult conversations with our families in order to help our recovery.

estone

I'm so glad I can be some comfort! Your kind words are doing great things for my crabby mood as well!

MSweeney

Kitty, you sound so much like me, and I'm a man! Having said that I do most of the cooking in our family (starting the minute I get home from work), which comes with the cleaning up at night, then I'm first up in the morning to make breakfast for my wife, empty the dishwasher, clean any soaking pots, and Iron a shirt for me and the kids and hopefully get out the door in time for work - often having forgotten my own breakfast!

From time to time the kids offer to cook which is a nice gesture, but you guessed it - dad's the cleaner upperer! And they usualyy use every pot in the house!

Whether at home or work I am a terrible delegator, and as you said 'It's easier if I just do it'. I did a family of origin exercise once which determined that I'm a carer/rescuer personality. How true is that! I'm the first to jump in and help, but can't stand the thought of asking someone to help me.

This probably doesn't help you one little bit, but please know that there's nothing wrong with you. You're not alone in the way you've raised your children. We all do it to the best of our ability (they dont come with an instruction manual), we all make mistakes, we all get to a point where we wish we'd done some things differently.

Hang in there. I can see you're doing a great job, and the fact that you love your children is so obvious in your post.