90 Days and Under Part 4
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Roxboro, NC
Posts: 544
Family meeting went so-so. Could have been worse, could have been better.
Today starting at this morning was the only peace I've had all week. Thankful for it. The drama is not over but the peak was tonight. It's all talk and acceptance and forgiveness now. I wish I could not be so vague but it's personal to my family.
This meeting didn't actually involve anything that I did wrong, I was simply a mediator and I did not like being in the middle of it.
Like I said the peak of drama is over and I did not drink through it all and I feel I'm right where I need to be spiritually.
Talk to you folks in the morning. Night!!!!
Today starting at this morning was the only peace I've had all week. Thankful for it. The drama is not over but the peak was tonight. It's all talk and acceptance and forgiveness now. I wish I could not be so vague but it's personal to my family.
This meeting didn't actually involve anything that I did wrong, I was simply a mediator and I did not like being in the middle of it.
Like I said the peak of drama is over and I did not drink through it all and I feel I'm right where I need to be spiritually.
Talk to you folks in the morning. Night!!!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 263
Good morning everyone,
These weeks are going so quickly.
Welcome back Shegirl, great to have you here with us, we're all moving in the right direction.
Tinman, glad the meeting is over. Sometimes important things don't move on as quickly as we would like, but any small improvement is worth celebrating. Small and sometimes unnoticeable adjustments in ourselves and others is a step in the right direction. Well done for keeping your head clear through it.
Haven't heard from NAT for a few days, do you think he's still biking through those mountains?
Dee, hope you hear from you friend today. Thoughts and prayers to everyone over there.
Speak later.
These weeks are going so quickly.
Welcome back Shegirl, great to have you here with us, we're all moving in the right direction.
Tinman, glad the meeting is over. Sometimes important things don't move on as quickly as we would like, but any small improvement is worth celebrating. Small and sometimes unnoticeable adjustments in ourselves and others is a step in the right direction. Well done for keeping your head clear through it.
Haven't heard from NAT for a few days, do you think he's still biking through those mountains?
Dee, hope you hear from you friend today. Thoughts and prayers to everyone over there.
Speak later.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Italy
Posts: 287
Hi Everyone
Good to see that everyone is still going strong.
I have been out of touch for a few days. I am trying to expand my sobriety support structure a bit - I have started reading "The power of now", doing lots of cycling, concentrating on my nutrition plus checking out a couple of other secular bits and pieces (all on top of the day job!!). Now I'm off to London for a week so probably wont be checking in till I get back.
Welcome back, shegirl. I would be interested in what triggers you had when you nearly reached 90 days. Any wisdom would be appreciated as this is all new ground for me atm. No worries if its personal stuff you dont want to share.
Ashes victory is already firmly written in the history books, Rosco. We now move on to break new records in the Twenty20.
Keep up the good work, everyone.
NAT
Good to see that everyone is still going strong.
I have been out of touch for a few days. I am trying to expand my sobriety support structure a bit - I have started reading "The power of now", doing lots of cycling, concentrating on my nutrition plus checking out a couple of other secular bits and pieces (all on top of the day job!!). Now I'm off to London for a week so probably wont be checking in till I get back.
Welcome back, shegirl. I would be interested in what triggers you had when you nearly reached 90 days. Any wisdom would be appreciated as this is all new ground for me atm. No worries if its personal stuff you dont want to share.
Ashes victory is already firmly written in the history books, Rosco. We now move on to break new records in the Twenty20.
Keep up the good work, everyone.
NAT
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Western PA
Posts: 416
Dee, so sorry to hear about your friend's son...that is tragic. Prayers are going out from me.
TinMan, glad to hear things are heading in the right direction for you, way to stay strong through all of it.
Nat, good to hear from you, let us know if you are learning anything useful as I think we are all in unchartered waters in our sobriety.
Have a great day everyone!
Coop
TinMan, glad to hear things are heading in the right direction for you, way to stay strong through all of it.
Nat, good to hear from you, let us know if you are learning anything useful as I think we are all in unchartered waters in our sobriety.
Have a great day everyone!
Coop
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 244
Dee, my condolences to your friend and their family. Noalcohol today, I dont mind. I went out with an old friend, we went to a tavern. I know now that I am not ready for that yet.We were suppossed to be going out to eat, and their was a misunderstanding between us that we were going to discuss. She ordered whine and I did too. I thought I could have one glass. I ended up getting totally drunk. I had the worst hangover that day. And needless to say me and my friend did not end up smoothing things over. So I dont want to loose anymore friends, and I like how I feel when I dont have to be sick and embarrassed the next day. I think what triggered it was that me and my friend always partied together, and it was a bar. They serve food. We did order wings we really didnt eat. i think it was a mix of atmosphere and company, and not using my judgement. I should of met her somewhere else. Like three days later I went to a 30th bday party at a house with alcohol and no temptation. Sorry for the long post.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 51
Hello everyone.
Weekend coming and it sounds like everyone is in good form. My older brother has invited the family over for the christening of his youngest girl so that should be lovely. The priest comes to their home and it feels very personal and nice. They did this also with their middle child.
The only weird part is that my family is really not religious at all. But the atmosphere is lovely and we all have cake afterwards. And no alcohol so I'm not complaining.
Shegirl, thank you for sharing your story. I can easily relate to it, how easy it is to fall into an old pattern with certain people and circumstances. We are all very early in our sobriety and have to keep our guard up.
Rosco, will google canasta later. Your activities are all new to me.
TinMan, glad to see you staying grounded in dealing with the drama.
Dee, these natural catastrophes put life in a whole new perspective. I forget how good my life is sometimes.
NAT - I've just started reading the same book. Let us know how you like it.
I'm still going to AA meetings. Been to 4 and ... well... I promised myself to give it at least a month. But so far they seem to be going through the motions, war stories, prayers... Not very heartfelt or inspirational. And if anyone claims it's not religious they are simply wrong. It is very much religious. It is a Christian club. And others are also welcome. Like in church.
But who knows, maybe I'll find someone there that I can relate to.
But so far, you guys are a much more important part of my sobriety and recovery.
Have a great weekend all.
Giraffe.
Weekend coming and it sounds like everyone is in good form. My older brother has invited the family over for the christening of his youngest girl so that should be lovely. The priest comes to their home and it feels very personal and nice. They did this also with their middle child.
The only weird part is that my family is really not religious at all. But the atmosphere is lovely and we all have cake afterwards. And no alcohol so I'm not complaining.
Shegirl, thank you for sharing your story. I can easily relate to it, how easy it is to fall into an old pattern with certain people and circumstances. We are all very early in our sobriety and have to keep our guard up.
Rosco, will google canasta later. Your activities are all new to me.
TinMan, glad to see you staying grounded in dealing with the drama.
Dee, these natural catastrophes put life in a whole new perspective. I forget how good my life is sometimes.
NAT - I've just started reading the same book. Let us know how you like it.
I'm still going to AA meetings. Been to 4 and ... well... I promised myself to give it at least a month. But so far they seem to be going through the motions, war stories, prayers... Not very heartfelt or inspirational. And if anyone claims it's not religious they are simply wrong. It is very much religious. It is a Christian club. And others are also welcome. Like in church.
But who knows, maybe I'll find someone there that I can relate to.
But so far, you guys are a much more important part of my sobriety and recovery.
Have a great weekend all.
Giraffe.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: West Coast, Australia
Posts: 319
Hello 90's!
Dee, the flooding has certainly been horrific. Lets hope the cleanup and rebuilding is smooth and quick.
Giraffe - Canasta is a card game - you play in pairs (btw, I'm heading down south to do some crabbing today).
Since giving up, I've been looking for things to do. Some are games that I used to play years ago and include "concentration" (you put all the cards face down and try to make pairs), scrabble, 500's, vanishing whist, lots of movies, going to the cafe's, and reading books. With cards, I'm trying to get my 11 and 15 year old interested. Socialising has definitely lost it shine. My immediate reaction is "why bother"? At last night's Canasta game (no drinking for me btw), the others were organising for 3 families to bring currys over for a "curry night". I was thinking "I can easily give this a miss". But life goes on, and it's a slow recovery and I'll search for the good things about a curry night (like what are the secrets to making a great curry - my last one was 5/10! any suggestions will be gratefully accepted!).
As I opened the door to the guests last night, the little voice started talking to me -" it's okay, perhaps just tonight will be fine". However, because I was prepared for this, the little voice was quite weak. That's something that I've really noticed with my biggest relapse risk (the little voice). If I prepare, ie, plan the night, remind myself about the little voice and jump on SR for support then I'm strong. It seems to be no different to say exercise - you don't get fit by sitting there - you have to work at it. Same for me with sobriety which means preparation for the "little voice".
I'm in a book club (past 5 years). Before joining, I think I would have read about a dozen books in my life! Now I get it - it's a wonderful insight into the minds of others. We take turns in selecting a book and give each a score out of 5. Tonight is the book review and meeting for "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close" by Jonathan Safran Foer and although the last several books have scored dismally, this one is a ripper!
Tinman - glad you've come through okay with your family meeting.
Giraffe - would you consider trying another AA?
NoAlcoholToday - best of luck with Eckhart Tolle - if it doesn't work, get the CD instead;
Shegirl - thanks for giving us your story; it really helps.
IamLivingFree - thanks for you great posts of support.
IWLSAST - played Gerry Raferty last night; what a talent
Coop1 - you're always posting! Thankyou!
Zuri - hope everything is going well with you and your family.
Akasha - I hope you're still okay post surgery and that you're not in any pain.
Chloe03 - thanks for being so positive in your posts!
And to everyone - stay strong and sober this weekend
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Dee, the flooding has certainly been horrific. Lets hope the cleanup and rebuilding is smooth and quick.
Giraffe - Canasta is a card game - you play in pairs (btw, I'm heading down south to do some crabbing today).
Since giving up, I've been looking for things to do. Some are games that I used to play years ago and include "concentration" (you put all the cards face down and try to make pairs), scrabble, 500's, vanishing whist, lots of movies, going to the cafe's, and reading books. With cards, I'm trying to get my 11 and 15 year old interested. Socialising has definitely lost it shine. My immediate reaction is "why bother"? At last night's Canasta game (no drinking for me btw), the others were organising for 3 families to bring currys over for a "curry night". I was thinking "I can easily give this a miss". But life goes on, and it's a slow recovery and I'll search for the good things about a curry night (like what are the secrets to making a great curry - my last one was 5/10! any suggestions will be gratefully accepted!).
As I opened the door to the guests last night, the little voice started talking to me -" it's okay, perhaps just tonight will be fine". However, because I was prepared for this, the little voice was quite weak. That's something that I've really noticed with my biggest relapse risk (the little voice). If I prepare, ie, plan the night, remind myself about the little voice and jump on SR for support then I'm strong. It seems to be no different to say exercise - you don't get fit by sitting there - you have to work at it. Same for me with sobriety which means preparation for the "little voice".
I'm in a book club (past 5 years). Before joining, I think I would have read about a dozen books in my life! Now I get it - it's a wonderful insight into the minds of others. We take turns in selecting a book and give each a score out of 5. Tonight is the book review and meeting for "Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close" by Jonathan Safran Foer and although the last several books have scored dismally, this one is a ripper!
Tinman - glad you've come through okay with your family meeting.
Giraffe - would you consider trying another AA?
NoAlcoholToday - best of luck with Eckhart Tolle - if it doesn't work, get the CD instead;
Shegirl - thanks for giving us your story; it really helps.
IamLivingFree - thanks for you great posts of support.
IWLSAST - played Gerry Raferty last night; what a talent
Coop1 - you're always posting! Thankyou!
Zuri - hope everything is going well with you and your family.
Akasha - I hope you're still okay post surgery and that you're not in any pain.
Chloe03 - thanks for being so positive in your posts!
And to everyone - stay strong and sober this weekend
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Roxboro, NC
Posts: 544
Good morning everyone. I'm at work today. I find myself coming in 2 hours earlier than my normal schedule and having a little trouble maintaining alertness lol. I am happy to be sober this morning.
I hope everyone has a great day! Stay strong, stay sober!!!
I hope everyone has a great day! Stay strong, stay sober!!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Western PA
Posts: 416
Good morning everyone, another sober Saturday morning and it feels fantastic!
Rosco- great post! I definitely relate on preparing for the voice in different situations now. Today is a big day here in Western PA..... ( Carlos will relate) our beloved Steelers are in a huge playoff game and it is a big reason to go get blitzed all afternoon. I will be watching it at a friends house and there will definitely be some drinking going on. But I am prepared, when the voice tells me one day won't hurt( which it inevitebly will)...Chloe's force field will be in full effect. I will not drink!
Hope everyone has a safe and sober weekend!
Coop
Rosco- great post! I definitely relate on preparing for the voice in different situations now. Today is a big day here in Western PA..... ( Carlos will relate) our beloved Steelers are in a huge playoff game and it is a big reason to go get blitzed all afternoon. I will be watching it at a friends house and there will definitely be some drinking going on. But I am prepared, when the voice tells me one day won't hurt( which it inevitebly will)...Chloe's force field will be in full effect. I will not drink!
Hope everyone has a safe and sober weekend!
Coop
Decide. Commit. Succeed.
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: On the road to recovery...
Posts: 895
Hi all, 
Nothing new and crazy going on with me. Sobriety has sucked all the drama out of my life!
Just relaxing this weekend and trying to catch up on some errands. Hope everyone enjoys a great booze-free weekend. And I'll catch up with you guys on Monday.
Nothing new and crazy going on with me. Sobriety has sucked all the drama out of my life!
Just relaxing this weekend and trying to catch up on some errands. Hope everyone enjoys a great booze-free weekend. And I'll catch up with you guys on Monday.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 263
Hi everyone,
I love reading everyone's posts it inspires me so much.
Rosco, i'm also finding loads of things to do. I don't know how I ever had time to drink! (well I do know, basically I didn't do anything else!).
Yesterday, I was told a very sad account about a fellow who's life is currently in tatters due to alcohol. He can't seem to accept that he is not in control of the poison, despite losing his family, his work, and his home. The situation has touched me deeply. I'm feeling a strong aversion to alcohol, and the advertising associated with it. It seems so wrong.
Today i'm actually happy to say "I don't drink" to anyone who may ask. My mind does fluctuate from time to time, and I do still get the stupid Gremlin voice, but this attitude "glad to be tea-total" is becoming more consistent each day.
Speak later,
I love reading everyone's posts it inspires me so much.
Rosco, i'm also finding loads of things to do. I don't know how I ever had time to drink! (well I do know, basically I didn't do anything else!).
Yesterday, I was told a very sad account about a fellow who's life is currently in tatters due to alcohol. He can't seem to accept that he is not in control of the poison, despite losing his family, his work, and his home. The situation has touched me deeply. I'm feeling a strong aversion to alcohol, and the advertising associated with it. It seems so wrong.
Today i'm actually happy to say "I don't drink" to anyone who may ask. My mind does fluctuate from time to time, and I do still get the stupid Gremlin voice, but this attitude "glad to be tea-total" is becoming more consistent each day.
Speak later,
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 51
Well you are back and that is the most important part of that sentence.
And good to have you back!
for you.
Do you mind sharing what lead to this?
After my negative comments here on my AA meetings I went to another one last Friday and it was really good. I was at a meeting with this group a week earlier but it was different or I was not in a good place maybe.
Just after I came in, this man comes up to me and addresses me by name. Anonymous my a** (very small country). After a moment of tearing through my head trying to figure out how he knew me he introduced himself. Turns out he is the son of my parents friends, who I haven't seen for decades. He has been coming to this group for nine years and he is in a really good place in his life. Last I heard of him he had his own drug lab or something.
So this group must be doing something right.
Anyway, came out really optimistic and have since had a great weekend cleaning and reorganizing my apartment. Finally some productive energy.
And now I actually look forward to my next AA meeting.
Hope you all had a good weekend.
Giraffe.
And good to have you back!
for you.Do you mind sharing what lead to this?
After my negative comments here on my AA meetings I went to another one last Friday and it was really good. I was at a meeting with this group a week earlier but it was different or I was not in a good place maybe.
Just after I came in, this man comes up to me and addresses me by name. Anonymous my a** (very small country). After a moment of tearing through my head trying to figure out how he knew me he introduced himself. Turns out he is the son of my parents friends, who I haven't seen for decades. He has been coming to this group for nine years and he is in a really good place in his life. Last I heard of him he had his own drug lab or something.
So this group must be doing something right.
Anyway, came out really optimistic and have since had a great weekend cleaning and reorganizing my apartment. Finally some productive energy.
And now I actually look forward to my next AA meeting.
Hope you all had a good weekend.
Giraffe.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Roxboro, NC
Posts: 544
Originally Posted by Zuri 
Back to day 1, no excuse....It happened!
Giraffe I'm glad you are finding something in AA. Glad you look forward to your next meeting.
I hope everyone has a great day!!! Stay strong, stay sober!!!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Italy
Posts: 287
Congratulations on 10 weeks, Iamlivingfree.
I dont really adhere to this idea that you have to go back to day 1, Zuri. Not unless you got really smashed, I suppose. Or if it was over several days where you were "out of control", so to speak. I know the purists think it is the only way to stay honest about sobriety and maybe they could be right in the very early stages of sobriety. It would be much more illuminating to consider what a "relapse" actually is, wouldn't it? The day count is of little real significance IMO. In the end, it depends on your overall attitude to yourself, your future, your family and how you manage the stresses around you. So far as I am concerned, you are still up there, Zuri, albeit with a minor slipup along the way. We are all aware that you are not kidding yourself about your efforts to get back to a better way of life. Well done!
I dont really adhere to this idea that you have to go back to day 1, Zuri. Not unless you got really smashed, I suppose. Or if it was over several days where you were "out of control", so to speak. I know the purists think it is the only way to stay honest about sobriety and maybe they could be right in the very early stages of sobriety. It would be much more illuminating to consider what a "relapse" actually is, wouldn't it? The day count is of little real significance IMO. In the end, it depends on your overall attitude to yourself, your future, your family and how you manage the stresses around you. So far as I am concerned, you are still up there, Zuri, albeit with a minor slipup along the way. We are all aware that you are not kidding yourself about your efforts to get back to a better way of life. Well done!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: NJ
Posts: 244
HI everyone, just checking in quickly. It does happen Zuri whats important that ur back! I know after my relapse I got alot of support here. Thank you everyone, and I'm feeling much stronger. Working on day 35 here
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 263
Zuri,
this journey of ours isn't straight by any means, there's a lot of self correction, or adjustment involved to reach the place we intend to go. You're not "off your course", you may have just been through a cross wind, your experience may help the whole team in the long run. Sorry to ramble, I'm just glad you're still with us!
this journey of ours isn't straight by any means, there's a lot of self correction, or adjustment involved to reach the place we intend to go. You're not "off your course", you may have just been through a cross wind, your experience may help the whole team in the long run. Sorry to ramble, I'm just glad you're still with us!
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