90 Days and Under Part 4
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Italy
Posts: 287
Originally Posted by Iamlivingfree 
Good morning everyone,
It's got to be band time again, surely,
Tinman, passed the 60 day mark;
Chloe, 10 weeks,
Phytoman, passed 8 weeks,
Rosco, 7 weeks,
WTS passed 10 weeks
Rosco, 7 weeks
Me on 9 weeks!
AND more celebrations tomorrow,
What a team, have a great day everyone,
It's got to be band time again, surely,
Tinman, passed the 60 day mark;
Chloe, 10 weeks,
Phytoman, passed 8 weeks,
Rosco, 7 weeks,
WTS passed 10 weeks
Rosco, 7 weeks
Me on 9 weeks!
AND more celebrations tomorrow,
What a team, have a great day everyone,
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Italy
Posts: 287
Originally Posted by Chloe03
I'm back from a week long pity party I threw myself! Don't know why the "storm clouds" lifted but I woke up this morning in a fantastic mood!
Originally Posted by Chloe03
After taking some time to reflect, I realize that I went through a similar slump when I reached 30 days! Don't understand why major milestones are causing me so much grief. But at least I know what to expect when 90 days rolls around. I'll be ready for it
Maybe part of it is a certain complacency after having achieved so much. And maybe we spend so much of our time concentrating on achieving these milestones that we dont fully prepare ourselves mentally for how we are going to handle things AFTER the milestone. I think you are wise to be thinking ahead and, whilst I am a week behind you, I think I will join you in starting to think beyond the 90 day target.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 263
Hi everyone,
(I hope i've got everyone's numbers/milestones right, apologies if not!)
Chloe and NAT, thanks for bringing up the slump issue. I also think we would be wise to think about this before reaching big milestones. I suppose 90 days is our next biggy.
Rather than the milestone itself being the goal, I wonder if the focus should be more to do with the kind of person we're becoming whilst reaching the milestone, or the kind of life we're heading towards. Then this will lead to more enthusiasm for the process rather than the goals (which will just come and go). Not sure quite how to do this at the moment, but I know that there's some fine brains here amongst us, so i'm confident that between us we'll work it out. Who knows - we may find the answer to the meaning of life, the universe and everything ( could it really be 42?)
It's definately something to mull over.
(I hope i've got everyone's numbers/milestones right, apologies if not!)
Chloe and NAT, thanks for bringing up the slump issue. I also think we would be wise to think about this before reaching big milestones. I suppose 90 days is our next biggy.
Rather than the milestone itself being the goal, I wonder if the focus should be more to do with the kind of person we're becoming whilst reaching the milestone, or the kind of life we're heading towards. Then this will lead to more enthusiasm for the process rather than the goals (which will just come and go). Not sure quite how to do this at the moment, but I know that there's some fine brains here amongst us, so i'm confident that between us we'll work it out. Who knows - we may find the answer to the meaning of life, the universe and everything ( could it really be 42?)
It's definately something to mull over.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Italy
Posts: 287
Originally Posted by Iamlivingfree
Rather than the milestone itself being the goal, I wonder if the focus should be more to do with the kind of person we're becoming whilst reaching the milestone, or the kind of life we're heading towards
Many years ago I went to a few alcohol councelling sessions. They told me then that it is necessary to abstain for at least 90 days (and preferably 6 months) before even considering having another drink. This correlates with some things I have read recently whereby the "hardwiring" of the addictive brain patterns will not be "unlearned" in less than 90 days (I mentioned this the other day) as well as the "90 AA meetings in 90 days".
I certainly feel like I need to start weaning myself off the day counting sooner or later. Its the journey that matters rather than the destination, as you say IALF.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
on the 30/60/90 days thing - just in case you missed it the other million times I've posted it LOL I find this PAWs (post acute withdrawal syndrome) link interesting.
I'm not diagnosing anyone, but it certainly fits my experience....I had a very difficult time around 60 days.
I think the value of the article is in the proactive ways it suggests to keep us happy, healthy and motivated
PAWS « Digital Dharma
D
I'm not diagnosing anyone, but it certainly fits my experience....I had a very difficult time around 60 days.
I think the value of the article is in the proactive ways it suggests to keep us happy, healthy and motivated
PAWS « Digital Dharma
D
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 51
Diet for Recovery:
* Three nutritious snacks each day,
* between meals and at bedtime
* Avoid Sugar and Caffeine
Found this on Dee's PAWS site.
I live on sugar and caffeine. I was never much for sugar but since I quit drinking I eat sweets every day. And I drink coffee all day long.
I need to change this. The idea of relapsing because I wasn't eating right... that's just too stupid. Buying healthy snacks tomorrow.
Sunday evening here in Frozenland.
Hope everyone had a good weekend.
Giraffe (on day 58)
* Three nutritious snacks each day,
* between meals and at bedtime
* Avoid Sugar and Caffeine
Found this on Dee's PAWS site.
I live on sugar and caffeine. I was never much for sugar but since I quit drinking I eat sweets every day. And I drink coffee all day long.
I need to change this. The idea of relapsing because I wasn't eating right... that's just too stupid. Buying healthy snacks tomorrow.
Sunday evening here in Frozenland.
Hope everyone had a good weekend.
Giraffe (on day 58)
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: West Coast, Australia
Posts: 319
Hi everyone and great posts! Lots to read and think about.
IamLivingFree - focusing on the person we're becoming is really it isn't it. The answer to the universe of 42 (Life, the Universe and Everything by Douglas Adams) captures it for me. Traveling the universe and then only to find out that it's "42". There are a lot of these examples, Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz finding out that the Wizard was "just" a man et al. (I'm sure most movie stars and celebrities find out that they are, er, well, just a person...). What does it mean to me? That there is no answer, it's that we live now, this very moment and be happy with the simple, little things. The simpler the better and nature is probably at the core of it all.
Dee, I'm glad you sent the link to PAWS. I find that I'm totally forgetting stuff. Yesterday, I made a booking for a restaurant today. Got up today and was asked "what time is the booking?". I said "what booking?". I was starting to worry about early onset of dementia!!!
Giraffe - I'm mostly off the sugar but I draw a line when it comes to coffee. I'm not giving that up!
NoAlcoholToday - "They told me then that it is necessary to abstain for at least 90 days (and preferably 6 months) before even considering having another drink." That's a very interesting comment - surely this alcohol councelling advice is just wrong. I have not a single doubt in my mind that I can never, ever go back to drinking. I presume that is the same for everyone here?
WTS & Zuri - I hope all is going well.
Tinman - 60 days+ - well done
Coop1 - hope all is going well with you and your family and friends.
Phytoman - still going strong and closing in on the 60 day mark!
Akasha - thanks for keeping up the posts and the positive thoughts!
Chloe03 - thanks for sharing the issues of the rollercoaster ride and effects of the big downers. I'm the same as you when it comes to AA - chicken; hoping that I'll be okay without it but be quick to go if it doesn't.
Carlos - hope all is well too!
Well, off to work!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
IamLivingFree - focusing on the person we're becoming is really it isn't it. The answer to the universe of 42 (Life, the Universe and Everything by Douglas Adams) captures it for me. Traveling the universe and then only to find out that it's "42". There are a lot of these examples, Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz finding out that the Wizard was "just" a man et al. (I'm sure most movie stars and celebrities find out that they are, er, well, just a person...). What does it mean to me? That there is no answer, it's that we live now, this very moment and be happy with the simple, little things. The simpler the better and nature is probably at the core of it all.
Dee, I'm glad you sent the link to PAWS. I find that I'm totally forgetting stuff. Yesterday, I made a booking for a restaurant today. Got up today and was asked "what time is the booking?". I said "what booking?". I was starting to worry about early onset of dementia!!!
Giraffe - I'm mostly off the sugar but I draw a line when it comes to coffee. I'm not giving that up!
NoAlcoholToday - "They told me then that it is necessary to abstain for at least 90 days (and preferably 6 months) before even considering having another drink." That's a very interesting comment - surely this alcohol councelling advice is just wrong. I have not a single doubt in my mind that I can never, ever go back to drinking. I presume that is the same for everyone here?
WTS & Zuri - I hope all is going well.
Tinman - 60 days+ - well done
Coop1 - hope all is going well with you and your family and friends.
Phytoman - still going strong and closing in on the 60 day mark!
Akasha - thanks for keeping up the posts and the positive thoughts!
Chloe03 - thanks for sharing the issues of the rollercoaster ride and effects of the big downers. I'm the same as you when it comes to AA - chicken; hoping that I'll be okay without it but be quick to go if it doesn't.
Carlos - hope all is well too!
Well, off to work!
Rosco.
Life=Fun; Alcohol=Devastation.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
Good to see you all doing so well. Zuri, sorry to hear of family troubles, but glad you didn't drink over them. I've been seeing an addiction counselor for three years now and she's been very helpful in dealing with two of my grown kids who are constantly 'at me'. I rarely miss my weekly sessions and look forward to seeing her each Tuesday to 'vent' and get her feedback and advice.
Between the help and support and friendship I get here, my counselor's help, and the unconditional love of my dogs, I'm happier than I've been in a long time. I hope you can find some peace of mind soon.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Ohio, USA
Posts: 316
I have heard of PAWS, and I'm not sure if the symptoms describe me, but I have had a hard time with days 60-70. I feel like I'm a dry drunk, not a recovering alcoholic. I'm not drinking, but my heart and soul are still in my disease.
bona fido dog-lover
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SF Bay area, CA
Posts: 99,780
I'm not drinking, but my heart and soul are still in my disease.
Not to sound like a mental health rep or anything, but have you ever considered counseling? There may be more going on than just staying sober and a good counselor might be a good place to start.
When I quit I found a lot of 'issues' came to the surface that I'd buried by drinking them away.
Counseling helped me come back to myself, so to speak, and be at ease with myself. At any rate, congrats on your sober time.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,442
I meant to come back to this WTS.
I felt like a dry drunk too on previous times I quit....obviously for me just not drinking was not enough to fix all my problems.
I knew it wasn't...but I didn't want to open the trap door to my cellar of unresolved issues....so I ignored the gnawing for as long as I could - about 2 months in my case at its longest...
and then, one night in a split second, I gave in and went back to drinking.
I knew it was bad for me, but I convinced myself it was the kind of bad I could deal with (I was wrong btw....I didn't just pick up where I left off....I picked up where I would have been had I drank those two months)
sounds like you might need more than simple abstinence too, WTS.
so...the $64k question is (and I wish I'd asked myself this) are you doing anything apart from just not drinking ?
and if not, why not?
You can treat both parts as rhetorical if you like, but do think about it - noone needs to be miserable in recovery
D
I felt like a dry drunk too on previous times I quit....obviously for me just not drinking was not enough to fix all my problems.
I knew it wasn't...but I didn't want to open the trap door to my cellar of unresolved issues....so I ignored the gnawing for as long as I could - about 2 months in my case at its longest...
and then, one night in a split second, I gave in and went back to drinking.
I knew it was bad for me, but I convinced myself it was the kind of bad I could deal with (I was wrong btw....I didn't just pick up where I left off....I picked up where I would have been had I drank those two months)
sounds like you might need more than simple abstinence too, WTS.
so...the $64k question is (and I wish I'd asked myself this) are you doing anything apart from just not drinking ?
and if not, why not?
You can treat both parts as rhetorical if you like, but do think about it - noone needs to be miserable in recovery
D
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Italy
Posts: 287
Thanks for the Digital Dharma link, Dee. It is a great article and I keep getting things from it.
I have been getting very few cravings but the last couple of evenings I have suffered from the "I could REALLY do with a glass of wine right now" syndrome. Now usually this passes quite quickly and on we go. But last night I knocked up a nutritious snack and voila!! I really do need to recognise low blood sugar level as hunger for a nutritious snack rather than a craving for wine!!
It certainly has screwed with my karma about sobriety and will make the 90 day thing especially awkward for me, Rosco.
It seems that mediterraneans have a completely different attitude towards alcohol altogether than we northern europeans/americans/aussies. They view alcohol as merely a food item to be used at meals within a family environment. As a result they drink very regularly but binge very rarely. I have read (Stanton Peele) that they successfully return from alcoholism to moderate use.
On the other hand, we northern europeans/americans/aussies largely view alcohol as a demon. This means we tend to drink less frequently but binge heavy quantities when we do drink, and usually outside the family environment. Treatment for alcoholism in our communities revolves around total abstinence. Being a pommey, I think this is the safer option for me BUT I am very anxious about viewing alcohol as a demon or evil in future AND any failure of total abstinence tends to be of rather gargantuan proportions.
Originally Posted by Giraffe
Diet for Recovery:
* Three nutritious snacks each day,
* between meals and at bedtime
* Avoid Sugar and Caffeine
* Three nutritious snacks each day,
* between meals and at bedtime
* Avoid Sugar and Caffeine
Originally Posted by YouAreNumberOne
"They told me then that it is necessary to abstain for at least 90 days (and preferably 6 months) before even considering having another drink." That's a very interesting comment - surely this alcohol councelling advice is just wrong. I have not a single doubt in my mind that I can never, ever go back to drinking
It seems that mediterraneans have a completely different attitude towards alcohol altogether than we northern europeans/americans/aussies. They view alcohol as merely a food item to be used at meals within a family environment. As a result they drink very regularly but binge very rarely. I have read (Stanton Peele) that they successfully return from alcoholism to moderate use.
On the other hand, we northern europeans/americans/aussies largely view alcohol as a demon. This means we tend to drink less frequently but binge heavy quantities when we do drink, and usually outside the family environment. Treatment for alcoholism in our communities revolves around total abstinence. Being a pommey, I think this is the safer option for me BUT I am very anxious about viewing alcohol as a demon or evil in future AND any failure of total abstinence tends to be of rather gargantuan proportions.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Western PA
Posts: 416
What's up everyobody, 60 days today...very interesting stuff being discussed here as I fit right into it all.
I was thinking this morning that the counting of days isn't that important to me anymore but these last 30 seemed a lot longer to achieve than the first 30 did. I was remembering the enthusiasm and vigor that I had the first thirty days....compared to now it almost seems like a job. I definitely think I need to change something up.
Congrats to everyone on all the new milestones....Let's keep it going. As I read around other threads I'm happy to be a part of this group. Let's see if we can't put our collective heads together and figure how we can accomplish the things that we want to in the future. I am open to all suggestions.
Have a great day!
Coop
I was thinking this morning that the counting of days isn't that important to me anymore but these last 30 seemed a lot longer to achieve than the first 30 did. I was remembering the enthusiasm and vigor that I had the first thirty days....compared to now it almost seems like a job. I definitely think I need to change something up.
Congrats to everyone on all the new milestones....Let's keep it going. As I read around other threads I'm happy to be a part of this group. Let's see if we can't put our collective heads together and figure how we can accomplish the things that we want to in the future. I am open to all suggestions.
Have a great day!
Coop
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Roxboro, NC
Posts: 544
Congrats Coop on day 60!!! Keep it up my friend.
I gave testimony last night at a church about my last hangover and how the last 60 days had been for me. Felt good letting people know that I was praying for death the night before my last hangover to now surrendering all to God.
I gave testimony last night at a church about my last hangover and how the last 60 days had been for me. Felt good letting people know that I was praying for death the night before my last hangover to now surrendering all to God.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 263
Hi everyone,
Coop, congratulations on your 60 days, and NAT on 9 weeks today
There's some good thoughts being banded about here at the moment, it feels like we're all stepping up a notch and breaking new ground. I'm still mulling over the last few days posts (work's been a bit busy, so I've not had quite as much time to check-in).
Hope everyone's had a great start to the week.
Coop, congratulations on your 60 days, and NAT on 9 weeks today
There's some good thoughts being banded about here at the moment, it feels like we're all stepping up a notch and breaking new ground. I'm still mulling over the last few days posts (work's been a bit busy, so I've not had quite as much time to check-in).
Hope everyone's had a great start to the week.
Decide. Commit. Succeed.
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: On the road to recovery...
Posts: 895
Hi all!
Just a quick check-in. It's been a crazy day and now I have about 100 things to do before bed.
I don't know why...but I'm surprised that others have been going through similar slumps. I know...I know...I'm not unique in my struggles. But sometimes I feel like I'm over-thinking and stressing out for nothing.
In the past, I've read posts on SR referring to PAWS but never took the time to research it. Boy, was that a mistake. 5 out of the 6 major symptoms, I've experienced almost constantly since I quit drinking!
Starting asap I'm really going to focus on taking better care of myself physically and emotionally. I need to seriously research PAWS and take more time to process the whole experience. Guess I'm at the point where just counting days isn't going to cut it anymore. Time to tackle the "baggage" left over from drinking for so many years.
Thanks Dee for posting the link to Digital Dharma. And I really appreciate all the feedback from the rest of the group. You guys rock!
Just a quick check-in. It's been a crazy day and now I have about 100 things to do before bed.
I don't know why...but I'm surprised that others have been going through similar slumps. I know...I know...I'm not unique in my struggles. But sometimes I feel like I'm over-thinking and stressing out for nothing.
In the past, I've read posts on SR referring to PAWS but never took the time to research it. Boy, was that a mistake. 5 out of the 6 major symptoms, I've experienced almost constantly since I quit drinking!
Starting asap I'm really going to focus on taking better care of myself physically and emotionally. I need to seriously research PAWS and take more time to process the whole experience. Guess I'm at the point where just counting days isn't going to cut it anymore. Time to tackle the "baggage" left over from drinking for so many years.
Thanks Dee for posting the link to Digital Dharma. And I really appreciate all the feedback from the rest of the group. You guys rock!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Ohio, USA
Posts: 316
Originally Posted by Chloe03
I don't know why...but I'm surprised that others have been going through similar slumps. I know...I know...I'm not unique in my struggles. But sometimes I feel like I'm over-thinking and stressing out for nothing.
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