Class of June-Part 2
Member
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,279
Hi everybody 
just checking in. Holding on & a little tired but doing ok.
Reb, I have also been having some flashbacks. Its amazing how quickly & strongly the remorse & guilt kick in. Lets make sure we keep that where it belongs.. in the past. We are on a new path now & we can forgive ourselves for the mistakes we made while under the influence & work on the present.
Take Care Everyone!
NB
just checking in. Holding on & a little tired but doing ok. Reb, I have also been having some flashbacks. Its amazing how quickly & strongly the remorse & guilt kick in. Lets make sure we keep that where it belongs.. in the past. We are on a new path now & we can forgive ourselves for the mistakes we made while under the influence & work on the present.
Take Care Everyone!
NB
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 249
Hi all,
Our little thread has gotten so quiet...I really wonder what happened to our classmates...I hope they are ok but I know from experience most likely they aren't... =(....wish they would check in regardless. I miss hearing from them all...well today is day 17 for me...trucking right along...I am trying to keep up with my exercise and trying to keep those flashbacks at bay....I really hope everyone is doing great!! I very rarely post anywhere else but here...for some reason it seems safer in here...odd I know...
Anyway, hope everyone is doing great...
HUGS!
Reb
Our little thread has gotten so quiet...I really wonder what happened to our classmates...I hope they are ok but I know from experience most likely they aren't... =(....wish they would check in regardless. I miss hearing from them all...well today is day 17 for me...trucking right along...I am trying to keep up with my exercise and trying to keep those flashbacks at bay....I really hope everyone is doing great!! I very rarely post anywhere else but here...for some reason it seems safer in here...odd I know...
Anyway, hope everyone is doing great...
HUGS!
Reb
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 235
Well hi! How is everyone doing? It seems like our thread has died down a little bit. I've been somewhat busy wrapped up in my life... I feel like I have had a lot of changes occur all at once-- GOOD changes though. 
Today's day 45 for me. July seems to be going by soooo fast. It's crazy.
I haven't been tempted to drink at all. I'm almost at the point where I forget what it's like to drink. I haven't really been around anyone drinking besides my roommate. I don't feel comfortable going to bars or anything yet...I'm not sure that I ever WILL be able to go back to places I used to drink... I'm making a conscience effort not to allow myself to get cocky here...and think I have this thing totally under control...because I don't believe that's ever really possible. I know that the last time I was sober about this long, it was a year or so ago, I actually convinced myself that I wasn't an alcoholic and could drink like a normal person. We all know how that ended up.
Live and learn, I suppose. I hope everyone is doing well!!!!
Today's day 45 for me. July seems to be going by soooo fast. It's crazy.
I haven't been tempted to drink at all. I'm almost at the point where I forget what it's like to drink. I haven't really been around anyone drinking besides my roommate. I don't feel comfortable going to bars or anything yet...I'm not sure that I ever WILL be able to go back to places I used to drink... I'm making a conscience effort not to allow myself to get cocky here...and think I have this thing totally under control...because I don't believe that's ever really possible. I know that the last time I was sober about this long, it was a year or so ago, I actually convinced myself that I wasn't an alcoholic and could drink like a normal person. We all know how that ended up.
Live and learn, I suppose. I hope everyone is doing well!!!!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 257
Reb- 
.....it has gotten VERY quiet in here. I hope everybody is OK. I miss hearing from them as well. Congrats on day 17!!!! Keep up the exercise and keep those flashbacks at bay!!
Lindsay-Glad to hear things are going well. You are strong and have a very realistic view of your drinking! Keep it up!
bnme-Hope your getting some sleep! I have been sleeping a lot too.
New Beginning-Glad you are doing ok!
I'm back from my short babysitting gig. Glad to be home. I had a few cravings. I was surprised that spending time in a new place may have triggered it. Guess I need to be careful when I stay away from home. YIKES! I have 4 weeks in a hotel coming up. I think this short unexpected 2 nights away may have been a blessing.
No alcohol-27 days
No cigarettes-10 days
.....it has gotten VERY quiet in here. I hope everybody is OK. I miss hearing from them as well. Congrats on day 17!!!! Keep up the exercise and keep those flashbacks at bay!!Lindsay-Glad to hear things are going well. You are strong and have a very realistic view of your drinking! Keep it up!
bnme-Hope your getting some sleep! I have been sleeping a lot too.
New Beginning-Glad you are doing ok!
I'm back from my short babysitting gig. Glad to be home. I had a few cravings. I was surprised that spending time in a new place may have triggered it. Guess I need to be careful when I stay away from home. YIKES! I have 4 weeks in a hotel coming up. I think this short unexpected 2 nights away may have been a blessing.
No alcohol-27 days
No cigarettes-10 days
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Alabama
Posts: 55
BJORK.....OMG, I AM SITTING HERE YAWNING AND FIGHTING TO KEEP MY EYES OPEN AS I TYPE.....WHAT IS GOING ON....I CAN'T SEEM TO GET ENOUGH LATELY!!!IT'S RAINING HERE RIGHT NOWMY FAVORITE WEATHER @ NIGHT...PERFECT FOR SLEEPING....I CA HARDLY WAIT TO NESTLE DOWN......GOOD TO HEAR FROM U....I'M SLEEPY BUT HANGING TOUGH....ALL I HAVE TO DO IS THINK ABOUT WHAT W/ DRAWAL WAS LIKE AND I REMEMBER REAL QUICK WHY I AM SOBER FROM NARCOTICS.....EWWWW, DON'T WISH THAT ON MY WORSTEST...LOL....OF ENEMIES!!!......FOR NOW GONNA SAY GOOD NIGHT....OR DAY WHICH EVER IT IS FOR U WHERE U ARE!!!,,,,,BNME!
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Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 257
Chama-Thanks for checking in! Glad to hear the family visit is going well and the kids are keeping you busy 
BNME-It's crazy how long the exhaustion lasts. I just keep in mind that my body has a lot of repair work to do for all the time I spent damaging it. Hope you get some strength back soon!
BNME-It's crazy how long the exhaustion lasts. I just keep in mind that my body has a lot of repair work to do for all the time I spent damaging it. Hope you get some strength back soon!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 235
Good morning everyone!
Did anyone happen to see the most recent Intervention episode on ae? Bret's? Oh my gosh...it was so sad. If anyone is interested in watching, you can go to ae.com and watch full episodes. I have somewhat mixed feelings about families/friends staging interventions...but I enjoy watching and learning from this show none the less.
Anyways- TGIF!!!!!! I'm in a good mood today. I don't really have any big weekend plans. I've been discussing moving in with my boyfriend...and I'm about to really FINALIZE it. It's a huge move for me- not just physically...but emotionally... I've lived with my best friend since college. That's about 7 years! It will be strange at first and certainly an adjustment...but I think moving on is the best move for me right now. She does still drink and has some wreckless tendancies which I'd probably be better off not being around.
The main obsticale involved in moving out is that we bought the house together. She said that her parents will likely buy me out of the mortgage and pick up payments...just to avoid her having to move somewhere else. (she has 3 dogs and could never afford a house on her own) There is a part of me that feels kind of guilty leaving her with that burden...I'm not sure how she will be able to pay bills, etc...but as my parents have been telling me I really need to just focus on myself...
SO...what are everyone's weekend plans??? Anything exciting???
Did anyone happen to see the most recent Intervention episode on ae? Bret's? Oh my gosh...it was so sad. If anyone is interested in watching, you can go to ae.com and watch full episodes. I have somewhat mixed feelings about families/friends staging interventions...but I enjoy watching and learning from this show none the less.
Anyways- TGIF!!!!!! I'm in a good mood today. I don't really have any big weekend plans. I've been discussing moving in with my boyfriend...and I'm about to really FINALIZE it. It's a huge move for me- not just physically...but emotionally... I've lived with my best friend since college. That's about 7 years! It will be strange at first and certainly an adjustment...but I think moving on is the best move for me right now. She does still drink and has some wreckless tendancies which I'd probably be better off not being around.
The main obsticale involved in moving out is that we bought the house together. She said that her parents will likely buy me out of the mortgage and pick up payments...just to avoid her having to move somewhere else. (she has 3 dogs and could never afford a house on her own) There is a part of me that feels kind of guilty leaving her with that burden...I'm not sure how she will be able to pay bills, etc...but as my parents have been telling me I really need to just focus on myself...
SO...what are everyone's weekend plans??? Anything exciting???
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 249
OMG I am craving so bad right now.....I am bored and hot and a beer sounds soo good right now. i feel like jumping out of my skin right now...I think I am going to go for a walk or grab something to eat...I was doing petty good until today so I am going to try and think what is bringing this on...GUHHHHH!! HATE this feeling!!!!! Today will be my 20th day....I WILL NOT DRINK!!!!!
Write more later...
Write more later...
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 249
Ok back I have to get this out of my head and onto here....if this triggers someone I apologize in advance and don't read further!!
I am completely glamorizing right now....
the can in my hand
the smell of it
the beads on the can
the taste, oh the taste
the calm it brings over me
the relaxed state
hmmmmmm breathing it in....
OK now back to reality
the hangovers, the guilt, the remorse, the shame, the pain in my soul...breathing it out now and remembering....the last 20 days have been too da&m amazing to throw away for this...I am BETTER than this!! I can't let my sick little thoughts creep back in and I will not let this win. I am pissed off at myself for even thinking this way!!!!
WHEW....I feel better...not by much but a little...ok off to go for that long walk now...
Thanks for letting me vent.....
~Reb
I am completely glamorizing right now....
the can in my hand
the smell of it
the beads on the can
the taste, oh the taste
the calm it brings over me
the relaxed state
hmmmmmm breathing it in....
OK now back to reality
the hangovers, the guilt, the remorse, the shame, the pain in my soul...breathing it out now and remembering....the last 20 days have been too da&m amazing to throw away for this...I am BETTER than this!! I can't let my sick little thoughts creep back in and I will not let this win. I am pissed off at myself for even thinking this way!!!!
WHEW....I feel better...not by much but a little...ok off to go for that long walk now...
Thanks for letting me vent.....
~Reb
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: 45 degrees latitude
Posts: 129
Hey guys!
I've been offline for easily a week
the wireless network adapter in my laptop here had been incredibly buggy. I finally had to do a system restore to get back online.
What have I missed? How is everyone doing? I hope things are moving along well for everyone
I'm still doing well! I'm through day 38 (as of 25 minutes ago, hehehee), and am looking forward to hitting six weeks. My psychologist told me at this week's meeting that six-weeks is the well-regarded amount of time that it takes for "new habits" to start to stick. Starting an exercise routine now doesn't seem that difficult - afterall, the last few weeks have breezed by.
I have felt tempted to seek-out booze a couple of times in the past week or so.... but I've found that analyzing my environment/situation at the time has led me to easily disregard the urge, all by realizing that the environment/situation is just fine as it is, and "catching a buzz" wouldn't add to it at all. I highly recommend going through such a train of thought whenever any of you get a craving. Please let me know if it helps - I'd really like to think that this kind of (almost) mantra is as helpful as it is simple.
My long-term boyfriend has been out of state since Wednesday, and won't be back until Sunday night. I'm feeling a little lonely. In the past, I would've already been up to 5 or 6 drinks by this time of night while alone and bored. Tonight, I'm gonna go eat up time playing isketch (you all should try that, btw!), snacking, working out, and cleaning.
I'll come back in a bit (gotta restart to install a driver) and start reading through recent posts by you folks. I really feel out of the loop! I hope I can easily catch back up with you all!
Take care everyone; I'll talk with you all soon!
I've been offline for easily a week
the wireless network adapter in my laptop here had been incredibly buggy. I finally had to do a system restore to get back online. What have I missed? How is everyone doing? I hope things are moving along well for everyone
I'm still doing well! I'm through day 38 (as of 25 minutes ago, hehehee), and am looking forward to hitting six weeks. My psychologist told me at this week's meeting that six-weeks is the well-regarded amount of time that it takes for "new habits" to start to stick. Starting an exercise routine now doesn't seem that difficult - afterall, the last few weeks have breezed by.
I have felt tempted to seek-out booze a couple of times in the past week or so.... but I've found that analyzing my environment/situation at the time has led me to easily disregard the urge, all by realizing that the environment/situation is just fine as it is, and "catching a buzz" wouldn't add to it at all. I highly recommend going through such a train of thought whenever any of you get a craving. Please let me know if it helps - I'd really like to think that this kind of (almost) mantra is as helpful as it is simple.
My long-term boyfriend has been out of state since Wednesday, and won't be back until Sunday night. I'm feeling a little lonely. In the past, I would've already been up to 5 or 6 drinks by this time of night while alone and bored. Tonight, I'm gonna go eat up time playing isketch (you all should try that, btw!), snacking, working out, and cleaning.
I'll come back in a bit (gotta restart to install a driver) and start reading through recent posts by you folks. I really feel out of the loop! I hope I can easily catch back up with you all!
Take care everyone; I'll talk with you all soon!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 235
Hey Reb! How are you doing today? Sounds like you had some major cravings...congrats for really allowing yourself to think through it. It's beneficial to know the thought process and hear it come from someone else-- because we're all there at some point. You did a wonderful job of not letting that distorted alcoholic voice win. yay!!! 
welcome back waterfountain! congrats on 38 days! i can relate to having to find things to keep you busy and occupy your time. for me, alcohol has always filled that void. if i was bored, i drank...what an entertaining way to pass time! (or...not) i've never heard of isketch, what's that?
bnme- you sure have been sleepy lately! are you getting enough rest? i know that your drug of choice was narcotics...but what exactly were you taking? i'm sorry, my memory is suddenly failing me... also, do you drink at all? i've always found it strange that some people who are addicted to narcotics can drink and have no problems in that department.
bjork- congrats on both your sober days AND your no-smoking days! that's great. being in a new place can DEFINITELY be triggering...i can relate...yay for staying strong.
cham! hope all is well with you. i'm sure you're staying busy...haha.
well today is 48 days. i'm excited to reach 60- haven't done that probably since i took my first sip of alcohol. well actually, i haven't since the day i started college, haha. so that would be since 2002. damn...7 years of insanity. i don't EVER want to waste away another DAY with alcohol.
today...i'm going to go to the gym and then head to my boyfriends to lay out. typical weekend! hope everyone has a great one.
welcome back waterfountain! congrats on 38 days! i can relate to having to find things to keep you busy and occupy your time. for me, alcohol has always filled that void. if i was bored, i drank...what an entertaining way to pass time! (or...not) i've never heard of isketch, what's that?
bnme- you sure have been sleepy lately! are you getting enough rest? i know that your drug of choice was narcotics...but what exactly were you taking? i'm sorry, my memory is suddenly failing me... also, do you drink at all? i've always found it strange that some people who are addicted to narcotics can drink and have no problems in that department.
bjork- congrats on both your sober days AND your no-smoking days! that's great. being in a new place can DEFINITELY be triggering...i can relate...yay for staying strong.
cham! hope all is well with you. i'm sure you're staying busy...haha.
well today is 48 days. i'm excited to reach 60- haven't done that probably since i took my first sip of alcohol. well actually, i haven't since the day i started college, haha. so that would be since 2002. damn...7 years of insanity. i don't EVER want to waste away another DAY with alcohol.
today...i'm going to go to the gym and then head to my boyfriends to lay out. typical weekend! hope everyone has a great one.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 257
Lindsay-Congrats on 48 days! I drank to alleviate boredom as well. I am much better with my time management now and manage to keep myself busy most of the time.
Reb-Your post was good! I could hear myself doing the exact same thing (except with a glass/bottle of wine). Thanks for reminding me of the games that my head can play. Glad you were strong!
My TV stopped working yesterday. I think the heat finally put it over the edge. Had dinner at a friend's house lastnight. NO temptation. Very easily declined the wine.
I hope everybody is doing well tonight!
Reb-Your post was good! I could hear myself doing the exact same thing (except with a glass/bottle of wine). Thanks for reminding me of the games that my head can play. Glad you were strong!
My TV stopped working yesterday. I think the heat finally put it over the edge. Had dinner at a friend's house lastnight. NO temptation. Very easily declined the wine.
I hope everybody is doing well tonight!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: 45 degrees latitude
Posts: 129
Lindsay,
Thanks much! It's good to be back! It's funny, what you said:
"...what an entertaining way to pass time! (or...not)" is exactly the conclusion I've come to. For whatever reason, drinking did seem like the perfect thing to pass the time. Since going sober, I almost feel like time passes much to quickly sometimes! Of course, there are still bouts of boredom.... but part of the fun mystery of being sober is discovering new things to scare away the boredom - or, sometimes even better, rediscovering things that you enjoy that can eat-up a whole night
As for isketch; man is that fun! It's like online pictionary; there are 10 or so players allowed in each room, 10 rounds of drawing (drawers are randomly picked by the game) where everyone in the room gets to guess at what's being drawn. You earn points by guessing correctly (first person to get it gets 10 points, 2nd gets 9, etc), and at the end of 10 rounds, the person with the highest points wins. You can pass on drawing and only guess if you'd like (or if you hate using a laptop pad to draw, heheee), and there's a parallel chat function, so you can be as social as you want during the game. Oh, it's fun
If anyone here is interested in meeting up to play, I think you can make your own rooms, so we could make a SR room if we were so inspired. Either way, I highly recommend it as a fun way to destress online.
Bjork,
Good job! Did you get sort of a rewarding feeling after realizing you felt no temptation? I almost get a swell of pride when I feel completely at ease with politely refusing a drink, or even when I hear myself say "Just water, please".
Bummer about the TV, but... it is summer. Go out and play instead :P (yeah, I know it's probably damned hot... sorry! It's freezing here in MN... in July! Gah!)
Time for breakfast! Back in a bit!
Thanks much! It's good to be back! It's funny, what you said:
"...what an entertaining way to pass time! (or...not)" is exactly the conclusion I've come to. For whatever reason, drinking did seem like the perfect thing to pass the time. Since going sober, I almost feel like time passes much to quickly sometimes! Of course, there are still bouts of boredom.... but part of the fun mystery of being sober is discovering new things to scare away the boredom - or, sometimes even better, rediscovering things that you enjoy that can eat-up a whole night
As for isketch; man is that fun! It's like online pictionary; there are 10 or so players allowed in each room, 10 rounds of drawing (drawers are randomly picked by the game) where everyone in the room gets to guess at what's being drawn. You earn points by guessing correctly (first person to get it gets 10 points, 2nd gets 9, etc), and at the end of 10 rounds, the person with the highest points wins. You can pass on drawing and only guess if you'd like (or if you hate using a laptop pad to draw, heheee), and there's a parallel chat function, so you can be as social as you want during the game. Oh, it's fun
If anyone here is interested in meeting up to play, I think you can make your own rooms, so we could make a SR room if we were so inspired. Either way, I highly recommend it as a fun way to destress online.
Bjork,
Good job! Did you get sort of a rewarding feeling after realizing you felt no temptation? I almost get a swell of pride when I feel completely at ease with politely refusing a drink, or even when I hear myself say "Just water, please".
Bummer about the TV, but... it is summer. Go out and play instead :P (yeah, I know it's probably damned hot... sorry! It's freezing here in MN... in July! Gah!)
Time for breakfast! Back in a bit!
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Texas
Posts: 249
Hey Lindsay and Bjork, thanks for asking about me!! I made it through that dreadful day/night and am back on track, didn't drink YEAH!!...was a really scary moment for me though. Thanks again!!!
I hope everyone is having an amazing weekend!!!
HUGS to you ALL!!
Reb
I hope everyone is having an amazing weekend!!!
HUGS to you ALL!!
Reb
Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: 45 degrees latitude
Posts: 129
Originally Posted by Jade19 
Hey Lindsay and Bjork, thanks for asking about me!! I made it through that dreadful day/night and am back on track, didn't drink YEAH!!...was a really scary moment for me though. Thanks again!!!
I hope everyone is having an amazing weekend!!!
HUGS to you ALL!!
Reb
I hope everyone is having an amazing weekend!!!
HUGS to you ALL!!
Reb
Today is day what for you? Are you at 3 weeks today? Well, no matter what the count, congrats and best of luck!
Well folks, I'm off to spend the morning and afternoon with my mom. We're going to a local casino (this will be our second time ever!), so wish us luck! If I win big, I'll happily send you junebugs some chocolate or candy of your choice
and if not.... then I'll try not whine about it lol.Take care everyone!
.........CONGRATS, BJORK!!!!
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