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Class of June-Part 2

Old 07-06-2009, 06:38 AM
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10 days today and I'm sitting outside of this place waiting to go get drug tested. It's not something the company I work for normally does but I am a special case. I went into work last night, I work night shift, and there was a letter there waiting for me instructing me to come here today. I also got a written warning from them during my last binge for something I did.....guess I don't remember everything after all. Seems for me anymore I crash and burn when I drink "So when I hit the wall, I really hit the wall"..

Sunday was my best day so far in a few weeks. I love Sundays when I am sober and this one did not disappoint. I'm getting my game face back on and ready be counted as one of the strong ones again. I had a good run at sobriety last year and a few people started looking towards me for strength. Enough of the insanity.

I really did have a good Sunday.
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Old 07-06-2009, 06:44 AM
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Jade19 I'm glad you didn't take the job. That took a lot of courage. Your for real sis. Very inspiring move, thank you for sharing it with us.
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Old 07-06-2009, 12:18 PM
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Way to go everyone!

Jade.. good on you for not taking that job. I don't usually walk by a liquor store (Canada Eh!) in the morning hours but did last week & got to see the line up of broken alcoholic souls waiting to get in to buy their drink of choice & get some alcohol in their system... truly sad.

waterfountain - I am trying to start an internet SEO company (search engine optimization). Here is a website that will tell you more about it SEO.com | Search Engine Optimization SEO & Internet Marketing Company My focus will be the local markets for SEO & driving traffic to their site & ultimately revenue. My partner & I seem to have completely different views on how to be successful so....
I will just work with is a day at a time.
----

Take care everyone & keep up the good work.

NB
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Old 07-06-2009, 10:26 PM
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It's been 3 full wks for me today....it's 12:30 a.m., i'm up eating ice cream, fell in the bed after a long monday @ work.....bi polar co worker....hard as hell to be cooped up with all day!! Getting hard as hell to deal with day after day....especially sober!!!!i say everyday thankyou god ...i have a job...i count my blessings........i wonder sometimes is this a mixed blessing of sorts....or am i mixed up.....i don't know on this one anymore.....anyway...here i sit...off of work today....thank god...gonna sleep late....hope all is good w/ all you good people!!!bnme
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Old 07-07-2009, 08:04 AM
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congrats on 3 weeks bnme! that's wonderful.

i'm back to work today after a nice long weekend. i went through my closet yesterday and filled a HUGE garbage bag with stuff i no longer wear. i feel very very organized! my closet was a mess...haha.

i don't have much time at the moment...kind of settling back into the work groove...just wanted to check in and say hello!
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Old 07-07-2009, 09:22 AM
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Hello All!!!

@Chama, We did celebrate!! We bought apple pie and ice cream...LOL...it was so good and it felt awesome to eat that instead of being blacked out!

@Chameleonboy and Lindsay, You know I just kept asking myself if I could handle it....the constant booze around me 24/7 and the answer was no. Plus I will admit it really bothered my heart that I might be contributing to someone else's problem. I know I needed the money but I also know that I can find something else. Keep me in your prayers/thoughts as I start looking for another job =)

@Bnme....WOOOHOOO!!!! Soooo awesome!! How are you feeling?

I watched that documentary on the main page, Rain in my Heart, OMG, it was so sobering and scary. I couldn't get through all the parts of it but if you get a chance go watch it. It really scared the %&#@ out of me....almost sent me into panic mode knowing that could have been me.

Anyway, today is day 9 for me and I am feeling pretty good. I think what's going to be important for me is that I keep reminding myself I am powerless and that no matter how great I feel I NEVER want to go back to day 1 again. It's just not worth it. I don't even want to be able to drink socially. I used to say I was jealous of those who could do that, but not anymore. I don't want to be like them, not even remotely. I'm okay with the fact that I am an alcoholic. I am not okay with dying from alcoholism. Anyway, I am blabbering again...LOL

Hope everyone has an amazing day and I really love you all!! Thanks for everything =) Each and every one of you inspires me =)

HUGS,
Reb
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Old 07-07-2009, 12:53 PM
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Hello everybody!

Reb-Glad you celebrated! You guys deserved it!

Lindsay-You beat me to the closet!! I have been thinking about mine for some time now. Maybe I'll get it done this week?

Today I have gone the entire day without a cigarette. It is seriously difficult!! I went to a smoking cessation message board. It is a lot like here! I kind of chuckled at the following line:

Take out your list of reasons to quit, read as much as you can, call a friend, take a nice hot bath, go for a walk, do whatever you need to do to stay smober.

I thought that was cute LOL

OK the lack of nicotine (I have lozenges, but I think I need something more) has left me a little irritated. I have been annoyed by everybody the past few hours.

1-A going away party was planned. Yesterday it was changed to dinner. Today it changed to apperitivo. Half an hour before we were to meet it was changed to watching the Michael Jackson tribute at someones apt that didn't have food or anything. I ate a sandwich and decided to stay home.

2-A colleague was supposed to sell me her phone and had specifically asked me to wait to purchase another and purchase hers. She text me today saying she may have to keep it. She'll let me know in a week.

These two things really annoyed me. I think it's quitting smoking.

Sorry to ramble on about no cigs.

Hope everybody is having a smokin' evening!
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Old 07-07-2009, 08:42 PM
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Hello
So sorry I've been missing for a few days....I was away from my computer all wkend, and I had a final tonight @ class so NO FREE TIME..at all and the few times I did try to log on, the site was down??
But anyway....I need to read back a bit to catch up....thanks for checking in on me Jade/Reb Made me smile, and glad you are doing ok!!
I've been ridiculously busy with work and school...I just realized today was day 30 for me?!?!?! I can't lie, I have thought about drinking, and even entertained the idea for a few minutes, but stopped myself before my thinking turned into actions---I can not go back to where I was 30 days ago---I WILL NOT GO BACK TO WHERE I WAS 30 DAYS AGO!!!
Hope everyone is doing ok...like I said, I need to catch up

Be happy for this moment.
This moment is your life.

~Omar Khayyam
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Old 07-07-2009, 11:23 PM
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Congrats on 30 days Jade09!!! :bounce Thanks for your post admitting when you think about drinking. I have had thoughts of having "just a glass of wine" run across my mind, but I quickly realize I can't do it. Like my last relapse, I would end up on a 2 day bender with my friends encouraging me the entire way.
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Old 07-08-2009, 12:09 AM
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Originally Posted by Jade19 View Post
I watched that documentary on the main page, Rain in my Heart, OMG, it was so sobering and scary.
I looked but couldn't find it, can anyone post a link if you know where is please?

Had a slow & easy day but a good day. Hope everyone is ok

NB
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Old 07-08-2009, 12:22 AM
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Found a link here http://wqd.netwarriors.org/showthread.php?t=10351
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Old 07-08-2009, 05:58 AM
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3 weeks is great bnme way to go man! I've also been thinking about that nightmare I call a closet....one of these days I'll clean. Quiting smoking bjork? I feel for you. I stopped about a year and a half ago after a few decades of smoking and I don't miss them at all. I'm so grateful I don't smoke anymore. Best wishes to you. NewBeginning010 I took a peek at your seo link. That looks like an intersting business, I hope it works out for you. I just got home from my 3rd 12 hour shift (only one more to go) and I'm tired. Ready for bed.

Everyone here sounds good. I Love the support in this thread.

Good night.
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Old 07-08-2009, 06:43 PM
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Chameleon.....where are u from?............just curious....i too am extremely tired just wanted to say thanks!!!....i am struggling to keep my eyes open...hopefully refreshed @ 6:00 a.m. For now....until then ...hope all are good!!bnme
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Old 07-08-2009, 07:56 PM
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Good Evening! Everything is good with me but I am (again) not overly chatty tonight. Waterfountain, I got your lovely pm, I'll respond tomorrow! Very sleepy tonight!

Hope everyone is treating themselves gently!
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Old 07-08-2009, 10:03 PM
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Hi all,

Ending day ten for me! YEAH, but I am so sleepy....finally falling into a normal pattern....so glad everyone is doing so good!!!

NB, did you get a chance to watch it? They also have it on youtube.....let me know what you thought....

Goodnight my internet family....

HUGS!!!!!
Rebecca
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Old 07-09-2009, 01:58 AM
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Originally Posted by Jade19 View Post
Hi all,

Ending day ten for me! YEAH, but I am so sleepy....finally falling into a normal pattern....so glad everyone is doing so good!!!

NB, did you get a chance to watch it? They also have it on youtube.....let me know what you thought....

Goodnight my internet family....

HUGS!!!!!
Rebecca
Hi Jade, yes I watched the whole thing last night. It was very sad but good for us to see as a reminder as to what can happen.

Up late, still struggling with being motivated for work/business, I have been reading & watching a lot of self help material & enjoying it.

I really connected with this video earlier today \/
Let me know what you think ;-)

Take Care,

NB

Here is the video \/

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Old 07-09-2009, 10:45 AM
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Congrats on 10 days Reb!!!! That's great! You're doing it!!!

I did watch the video "Rain in my Heart" lastnight. WOW! That video is going to stay with me for a long time! I had many different emotions while watching that. Thanks for posting it.

Day 3 sans cigarettes! YAY! I'm still pretty irritable, but I know it will pass. I have nicotine lozenges to help me out if I need them.
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Old 07-09-2009, 10:55 AM
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Originally Posted by bjork View Post
Congrats on 10 days Reb!!!! That's great! You're doing it!!!

I did watch the video "Rain in my Heart" lastnight. WOW! That video is going to stay with me for a long time! I had many different emotions while watching that. Thanks for posting it.

Day 3 sans cigarettes! YAY! I'm still pretty irritable, but I know it will pass. I have nicotine lozenges to help me out if I need them.
WOW Bjork!!! CONGRATS ON 3 DAYS and your sober time!! You are rocking it out!!!! That documentary seriously almost drove me into a full panic attack because i could hear bits and pieces of myself in each of them...I was like HELL NO am I ever going back there..I am glad I have access to it because if I ever get to the urge to drink I am going to watch it...

NB, I will watch it now and let you know what I think....

HUGS!!
Reb
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Old 07-09-2009, 11:00 AM
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HAPPY 30 DAYS WATERFOUNTAIN!!!!

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Old 07-09-2009, 11:02 AM
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NB, I REALLY enjoyed it!!! I saved it to my library!! Thanks =)
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