Creating New Habits
Member
Join Date: Dec 2020
Location: New England, U.S
Posts: 204
Mizz- you are in my thoughts today after catching up on you and your life. 439 days of sobriety, wow! Your attitude and your sobriety continue to be a source of inspiration for me. Prayers sent out for you from far away across the U.S.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Originally Posted by Mizz 
439 days sober!
Keep on keeping on people.
Keep on keeping on people.
Keep going on your path to freedom and happiness, Mizz!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,748
Good Morning!
My routine is a bit messed up. I just need to sleep more right now and take it easy. Easy on myself, my work, my relationship.....easy on the brain. I feel so grateful to have a job where creativity gets to shine. I tried to construct my first ever flower Christmas tree yesterday. It did not go as planned but the arrangement is beautiful. We put a string of lights around it.
Me to coworker: Does this look like a Christmas tree?
Coworker: No, but it is beautiful.
Me:
Better luck next year.
A carrier pigeon is delivering the images of the lesion to OHSU I was called yesterday and told that they finally sent the referral and that I should be seen in 3 to 4 weeks time. UPS has the images actually. So, with our technology in 2021 there is not a faster way to send images? Like, email or some advanced kind of internet sending power? I guess I just wonder why they have to be sent via horseback? I suppose it really doesn't matter. We are moving forward now. Onwards and upwards.
So, OHSU is only a few weeks away.
A lot has happened at work with people and this pandemic so I have a lot to do and a lot to focus on. This lesion is not the focus. It is. It isn't. I need to be at work. Work, my spouse, my friends, and sobriety.
Merry Christmas, Everyone!
My routine is a bit messed up. I just need to sleep more right now and take it easy. Easy on myself, my work, my relationship.....easy on the brain. I feel so grateful to have a job where creativity gets to shine. I tried to construct my first ever flower Christmas tree yesterday. It did not go as planned but the arrangement is beautiful. We put a string of lights around it.
Me to coworker: Does this look like a Christmas tree?
Coworker: No, but it is beautiful.
Me:
Better luck next year. A carrier pigeon is delivering the images of the lesion to OHSU
I was called yesterday and told that they finally sent the referral and that I should be seen in 3 to 4 weeks time. UPS has the images actually. So, with our technology in 2021 there is not a faster way to send images? Like, email or some advanced kind of internet sending power? I guess I just wonder why they have to be sent via horseback? I suppose it really doesn't matter. We are moving forward now. Onwards and upwards. So, OHSU is only a few weeks away.
A lot has happened at work with people and this pandemic so I have a lot to do and a lot to focus on. This lesion is not the focus. It is. It isn't. I need to be at work. Work, my spouse, my friends, and sobriety.
Merry Christmas, Everyone!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,748
Originally Posted by advbike
How are you doing, Mizz? I hope things are going well and you are feeling strong. You are amazing!
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!
I have coronavirus and have been sick all week. This morning is the first morning since Monday where I am up and drinking some coffee. I am on the mend now. I suppose it would be worse if I were not vaccinated? This virus is spreading through our community rapidly and since I work with the public I think it leaves me as a sitting duck.
I do think there is something about our stress levels and our immune systems. Anyways, I am on the mend now.
Life is full of surprises. Happy New Year!
( I havent even wanted to write here due to all of this stuff happening. It seems completely impossible for so much to happen in so little time. I just feel a bit blindsided. I am optimistic. Truthfully, you cant make this **** up! Keep on moving forward!)
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,748
Good Morning, SR!
Sober.
Recovering from this virus has been extremely hard. I'm on day 12 of slowly making my way to a healthier version of myself. Lots of sleeping, watching every series known to man and playing a word game on my phone. Each day I get a bit more energized and can do a little more than the day before. I really just cant describe how intense this has been. I know I have a flare for the dramatic but this is no damn joke.
I was awake all day yesterday and so that is a sign of improvement. This morning the migraine was less severe. My head is starting to focus more. Its the little things. I finally washed my hair after a week, washed the bedding and blankets.....got the dishes done. Baby steps. I dont know how to do this "sick" thing very well. I look forward to feeling well enough to get back to the hobby of running and feeling physically well. I truly think it is going to be awhile before any of that happens. Ill take all the little steps as a sign of getting healthier and that I am moving into myself again.
Im sober. Im grateful. My cat loves me. She has been by my side for the entirety of this illness. Its like she is trying to "purr" me back to health.
I really am putting everything I have into getting well before I head to the eye appointment on Tuesday.
That will be its own intensity. I am calm. Ready for whatever information and ready to hear what we are going to do. Solutions. Solutions. Solutions.
Have a great day!
Sober.
Recovering from this virus has been extremely hard. I'm on day 12 of slowly making my way to a healthier version of myself. Lots of sleeping, watching every series known to man and playing a word game on my phone. Each day I get a bit more energized and can do a little more than the day before. I really just cant describe how intense this has been. I know I have a flare for the dramatic but this is no damn joke.
I was awake all day yesterday and so that is a sign of improvement. This morning the migraine was less severe. My head is starting to focus more. Its the little things. I finally washed my hair after a week, washed the bedding and blankets.....got the dishes done. Baby steps. I dont know how to do this "sick" thing very well. I look forward to feeling well enough to get back to the hobby of running and feeling physically well. I truly think it is going to be awhile before any of that happens. Ill take all the little steps as a sign of getting healthier and that I am moving into myself again.
Im sober. Im grateful. My cat loves me. She has been by my side for the entirety of this illness. Its like she is trying to "purr" me back to health.
I really am putting everything I have into getting well before I head to the eye appointment on Tuesday.
That will be its own intensity. I am calm. Ready for whatever information and ready to hear what we are going to do. Solutions. Solutions. Solutions.
Have a great day!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 3,748
Good Morning!
I am finally feeling alive. The last few days have been on the up and up with energy. I am still in recovery mode from the virus but....I feel so much better. Much better and much more hopeful.
We made it back from the eye appointment and I will be having surgery in the coming weeks. The lesion has to undergo a biopsy and then we will know where to go from there. It is either pre-cancer or cancer. There are some areas in the lesion that are raised and the surgeon is concerned about those particular areas.
We are tackling things as they present themselves. So, todays problem with todays solutions.
If the biopsy is negative then I dodged a giant bullet and I skip off into the sunset. If its positive then I undergo body scans and radiation to my eye.
It will take me a few weeks to recover from the eye surgery so I will be off of work and activities during that time. No dust. No running. No digging in the dirt. Lol. There goes my plans to remodel my yard next month! JK.
So, is this the best news? Yes and no. It is what it is.
I feel very confident in this surgeon and her ability to stop whatever is happening from continuing to happen in my eye. I knew that I was receiving news that was going to be a bit life changing in the short term. This was not "Oh, that lesion! Its nothing. Carry on with your life"
I was very calm at the appointment. Very ready to hear whatever the diagnosis was/ is and I said "Okay. So, when is the surgery? lets go!"
Just because I am so full of detail:
Half of my eye ball will have undergone a excision. This lesion is surface level and so she is removing the lesion and areas around the lesion. From the iris to the tear duct. Basically the entire left half of my right eye. Just the surface layers though. I was told this is going to be painful for the first week. When I hear a doctor/ surgeon tell me its going to be painful I kind of cringe a bit. How much pain are we talking about? Ill know soon enough. Im really not getting ahead of myself here. I am here now. Also, I have yet to experience any anxiety or rumination. Go me!
Since this is a recovery site I would like to say that I did think of drinking. I thought for a split second or two that a glass of wine would help. Then I dismissed that thought and I took a bath. Ate some food. Went to bed. Thoughts are not actions. I am sober. I will remain sober. There really is no other way if I want to get through this life challenge and be healthy. Its a challenge. Nothing more. Nothing that we cannot handle with the right tools and the right mindset.
I am finally feeling alive. The last few days have been on the up and up with energy. I am still in recovery mode from the virus but....I feel so much better. Much better and much more hopeful.
We made it back from the eye appointment and I will be having surgery in the coming weeks. The lesion has to undergo a biopsy and then we will know where to go from there. It is either pre-cancer or cancer. There are some areas in the lesion that are raised and the surgeon is concerned about those particular areas.
We are tackling things as they present themselves. So, todays problem with todays solutions.
If the biopsy is negative then I dodged a giant bullet and I skip off into the sunset. If its positive then I undergo body scans and radiation to my eye.
It will take me a few weeks to recover from the eye surgery so I will be off of work and activities during that time. No dust. No running. No digging in the dirt. Lol. There goes my plans to remodel my yard next month!
JK. So, is this the best news? Yes and no. It is what it is.
I feel very confident in this surgeon and her ability to stop whatever is happening from continuing to happen in my eye. I knew that I was receiving news that was going to be a bit life changing in the short term. This was not "Oh, that lesion! Its nothing. Carry on with your life"
I was very calm at the appointment. Very ready to hear whatever the diagnosis was/ is and I said "Okay. So, when is the surgery? lets go!"
Just because I am so full of detail:
Half of my eye ball will have undergone a excision. This lesion is surface level and so she is removing the lesion and areas around the lesion. From the iris to the tear duct. Basically the entire left half of my right eye. Just the surface layers though. I was told this is going to be painful for the first week. When I hear a doctor/ surgeon tell me its going to be painful I kind of cringe a bit. How much pain are we talking about? Ill know soon enough.
Im really not getting ahead of myself here. I am here now. Also, I have yet to experience any anxiety or rumination. Go me! Since this is a recovery site I would like to say that I did think of drinking. I thought for a split second or two that a glass of wine would help. Then I dismissed that thought and I took a bath. Ate some food. Went to bed. Thoughts are not actions. I am sober. I will remain sober. There really is no other way if I want to get through this life challenge and be healthy. Its a challenge. Nothing more. Nothing that we cannot handle with the right tools and the right mindset.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Sonoran Desert & Southeast Asia
Posts: 6,561
Fantastic post, Mizz. I am so glad you're in good, capable hands, and your attitude is beyond amazing. Good for you for resisting the glass of wine!
So glad it is turning out this way. You will get through this just fine. Big hug for a brave woman. You're my hero!
So glad it is turning out this way. You will get through this just fine. Big hug for a brave woman. You're my hero!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
