Tiredofdrugs

Ahhhhhhhhhh Another Arkie on the Hen House! Welcome fellow states man. Even if I am a w-o-m-a-n! LOL Congrat's on the thirty days clean. Everyone is wishing me luck because I start on day one AGAIN Tuesday by getting off the opiates AGAIN! I've been back on them since this past Christmas. Feel free to post about anything on here. We have a good ole time here on the HH. Lots of wonderful ppl here to talk with and to give you good advice on different things. Even how to cook Oxtail Stew! Ewwwwww That ought to tell you I'm NOT the one giving out the recipe! LOL How old are you? I see you have a daughter and work at wally world. Our neighor also works at wally world. Feel free to talk away. There's usually someone always around on here. You can also check out the Substance Abuse thread to read many other stories.

Cangel: There are lots of stories on the Substance Abuse thread or the new comers threads that will tell of stories being way worse than what I'm getting ready to go thru. But my journey isn't going to be NO picnic in the park either. The first 3 to 4 days is what's going to be the worst of it.

I've been working like a mad woman around here trying to get things done so Jethro won't have so much to do when I'm unable to. Got all the laundry done. Just changed the sheets on our bed even though I'll be sleeping in the spare bed for a week or two. It's 1:00 am but I'm going to put the boys out and get their crates cleaned up too. Still have to potty the girls too. I'm not on any time zone to be worried about so I'm just trying to get as much done as I can before I run out of my pills. God I hate going thru this again! But I'm sooooooo grateful I have my friends here to talk to and with to help me get thru this. I'd hate to know I just had to sit here and endure this in silence.

Well better get busy!

Love ya'll
TOD

Tiredofdrugs

Joe: Congrat's on the upcoming 90 days. I know you are very excited about that. You've struggled for so long and now look where you are? Enjoy the glory!

Well! While you others are enjoying your clean time! I'll be starting mine today. Or rather it will start when I wake up sometime this afternoon. I'm looking forward to getting off the pain meds. I've been off of them before and enjoy the me I am off of them. I have asked Jethro to keep the meds he uses, well out of sight. Sometime along the way of my using. I found a bottle of mine he supposedly thought he had hid. When you are in the throws of using and find an unopened bottle of 120 pills! Well ya'll get the picture.

Now I start a new chapter. I have the medical team preparing to do something about my back pain which I'll be glad to be rid of. So I'm hoping it goes well.

I've gotten as much stuff done as I can manage. Jethro will be on his own when he gets home from work. I'll probably not be of much help to him. He loves me dearly and would lasso the moon for me if it would make me feel better quicker. I can only dream about that. LOL He'll be able to stop on the way home and get himself something to eat. I'll probably not have much of an appetite the first two weeks.

I took the last pills about four hours ago. I'm heading in to take a shower then heading to bed. I'll post when I get up. It's going to be 100 degrees today. Glad I'll sleep it away. I never got the spare bed ready so I'll have to work on that tonight.

Love ya'll
TOD

Timebuster

(((chicory))) Did you buy your Chevy truck new or used? They are very dependable trucks ain’t they. Mine is a 2005 Z71 off road package with a 5.3 engine. When they say off road what do they actually mean? Like you can drive it on top of the sidewalk...lol. I could never figure that one out. I bought it used with 78.000 miles and knock on wood I haven't had any major problems to complain about.

I'm glad you like my post, I hope (((Jay))) gets a chance to read it. To start being in the moment in a healthy way it is necessary to heal our "inner child." The inner child we need to heal is actually our "inner children" who have been running our lives because we have been unconsciously reacting to life out of the emotional wounds and attitudes, the old tapes, of our childhoods.

My experience with inner child work, the way to remove that awful voice in our head is to own that child's experiences, honor that child's feelings, and release the emotional grief energy that we are still carrying around. We do have the power to change, if we put the "WORK" that is necessary to heal our souls.

Love ya
TB

chicory

(((Joe)))Congrats on 90 days ! you have worked hard friend, and I am happy for you. What is your secret? hugs


(((tod))) yes, we will be here for you, you can be sure. I don't know personally how this is going to be for you, so I will take my cue from the HH in how to be supportive. love ya. get good rest.

(((Onntop31))) welcome to the Hen House! there are Roosters as well, of course. Congrats on your 30 days! another Arkie, or is it Arkansian? good to have you, how are things in your state?

well friends, hope the day brings blessings. just having each other is a big one.

love you all,
chicory

Timebuster

(((Ontop31))) Welcome to Sober Recovery, congrats on your 30 days. Please make your self at home. Have you been to the newcomers thread? A good place to introduce yourself to the Sober Recovery community. Best of luck in your journey. Hope to hear more about you as you get comfortable with our community.

Much love
TB

chicory

Wow, (((TB))) I could use some lectures on that inner healing stuff. Have you learned this from your meetings, I mean, any counselling, or have you put this together on your own? amazing how you pinned it down, it makes so much sense. Although I thought I had mourned for the abandoned/abused child in me, I have so much more to do. Mainly, to learn what normal behavior should have been, on my parents part. You don't know what normal is, when you are a COA. Really learning about trust, boundaries, self-respect, what is abusive, etc, is more complicated than I initially thought. I think I am starting to learn how to love myself, which shows me what I did not get taught. I sure wish I could put stuff into words like you can. I just hope you know what I am trying to say

I love my little truck. it is a red silverado, 5.3 liter, vortec ? sp, engine. I got it back in 2001, it had been totaled, but new engine. only 90,000 on it now. hopefully it will last me a while. i have had some work done, exhaust, new water pump, new fuel injectors, brakes. nothing too major. I need a comfortable seat, as the bench seat is not comfy. but i have dealt with it now for 10 years, so may as well not worry over it.
I saw a new Chevy Silverado yesterday, it was so pretty, made me want one.
your truck is beautiful! I want it! trade? mine is a short bed, which is sort of rare. body is nice, new paint job a few years ago. my last husband was a car nut, and had a nice muffler system on it, sounded so good, but the one I had put on does not have that throaty rumble, tho it is ok.

how are you today?

Timebuster

(((chicory))) The length and severity of the detoxification process (detox) depends on a number of factors, including the substance being detoxed from, the temperament of the person and the length of time the person has been dependent on the drug. Detox is a two-fold process that includes both mental and physical symptoms and side effects that must be treated for a successful recovery.

Prescription painkillers can prove difficult to withdraw from, because those who become addicted may not be prepared for the idea that they have become addicted. Often prescribed for pain and for treatment of injuries, medications such as Vicodin, Lortab and Oxycodone contain a powerful narcotic. Withdrawal symptoms usually last for 24 to 72 hours and include intense cravings, irritability, sweats, nausea, diarrhea, vomiting and sleep deprivation. Depending on the amount and duration of the addiction.

So now you have some idea what our (((TOD))) is going to go through when withdrawals hit her this late afternoon.

Love ya
TB

chicory

Thank you (((TB))) for explaining to me. That sounds tough. But then again, our (((TOD ))) is tough too.

love ya too,
chic

ProfaneAngel

Just popping in - I need a quick break from the roller-coaster life is at the moment - because I want to express my sadness over the loss of Andy Griffith. As a North Carolina native the sadness is particularly heightened - we gladly claimed Andy as our own, and he in turn portrayed us as we were or wanted to be. There was a bit of Mayberry in every town in NC. I wonder how UNC will honor him, as he was a graduate of that stellar institution. Anyway, more battles to fight with my insurance, an appointment to be scheduled with my oncologist, and unbearable heat to ignore as best I can in my a/c, being sure to keep the animals inside unless absolutely necessary, while putting bowls of water in the shade outside. RIP, Andy, and thanks. TPA

JustAYak

Thanks for your posts ((TB)). I'll have to go back and read it again a little later. My brain is fried right now, I need some real sleep but as tired as I am, I can't get any.

((Joe)) - Congrats on your 90 days! That is something.

((TOD)) - Good luck as you begin to detox. I'm not going to say I hope it's easy on you, I hope it's not so you never want to go back to it again.

I had cancelled my appointment with my therapist and she called yesterday asking why. She told me that considering where I've been recently, she thinks I need to come in. That may be so, but if I go it'll just be a waste of her time, my time, and my money because I know I won't talk and we'll just sit there like idiots in awkward silence. She said to write down everything in an email and send it to her so she knows what's going on and then maybe we'll talk about it when I get in there but I don't know if I want to. She told me she'll keep the spot open in case I decided to show up.

Thank you all for your support and posts...they've been comforting.

chicory

(((Jay))) she sounds like a great person. keeping that spot open. I agree with her, about considering where you have been lately.
maybe email a good bunch of stuff, things you have been sharing here too, and go in as well. then she knows without you having to say it all. that would seem helpful.

i hope you go.

that is a cute little emoticon you got there.


(((tpa)))hello there lady. been hoping to hear from you, but sad about why you are posting today. Andy Griffith was a real American treasure, and I am sure you must be very proud that he hailed from your state.

He always was the kind of guy I would have liked to have for a dad, or uncle. God rest him, and he will make a wonderful addition to the choir.

RIP "Anj"


hugs to you tpa, stay cool, and rested. we miss you.

Lenina

((((JayBird)))). Therapy is hard. But so worth it. If you can, please keep your appointment. many times while I was in therapy I'd get so discouraged I didn't want to go, I didn't see how it was helping as I was just angry or depressed a good part of the time. But I was making significent progress. I just couldn't see it at the time.

Sounds like your therapist cares about you. Even if you can't quite trust her at this time, give it a chance.For me, at one point it felt like dominoes when suddenly it all made sense. I was in a bit of the Twilight Zone while it all sank into place. But I was finally able to understand, the pieces fit! I had a clearer picture of my history. and I felt better.

Today I still react to echoes of memories but they don't send me into the pit.

Please know we are all here for you and do care.

Much love from Lenina

Mattcake

Jason, emailing her sounds like a good compromise... See how you feel after letting it all out, you might want to see her after all. Or not.

Remember, if you are being true to yourself, then you can trust yourself. And that's huge

(((Everyone)))

Impurrfect

Welcome to new Henhousers and congrats on 90 days ((Joe))!

Just a drive by - got a dress that can work for a wedding (with a little spiffing up) as well as an interview should I ever get one. Wedding is not going to be in a church but on a mountain..in KY..at 4pm in this heat.

The place I made reservations turned out with bad reviews, just made more after arguing with dad. Sm says we can't afford $200/room (for 2 nights), dad and I asked her if she wants to sleep in the van. We're most likely taking my car, so I can't stay at a different hotel but I DO have my own room and got a swimsuit so I can hang out at the indoor pool.

Very irritable, it seems like I'm never going to get back to my cheerful normal self, but have a good chance when I go to my friend's lake house tomorrow.

Got to get busy with school stuff. We're on break, but there is a LOT of stuff crammed in at the end of the semester so I'm trying to get ahead. I'm also thinking if I'm busy with school work, no one will bother me in this house.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Timebuster

(((Jay))) What (((chicory))) wrote is a good idea. Where there is a will there is a way. Since you are having therapy block when you see your therapist why don't you try this. You always felt very comfortable expressing your feelings to us here at the HH why not write down what is your going through your mind before hand. When your finish copy and paste it and e-mail to your therapist. This way when you have your appointment you have something with substance to talk about. The two post you wrote the other day came from your heart/gut, I have to tell you buddy you let it all out. I agree with everyone, please try to keep your appointments.

Love you young brother
TB

Impurrfect

(((Jay))) - just an observation - you've kept stuff in for a long time. You're gradually getting to where you are letting it out with people you trust. That is NOT a minor thing. You may not be where you want to be, over all this shytt, but you have made a lot of progress and I don't want you to ever forget that.

I think all of us have done that to some degree. I've shared things here, that no one else knows. It's our safe place, and I appreciate you all.

Thunderstorms are moving in, just chased down the cats to get them inside and am back to working on homework. I'm a bit less irritable than I was, but it's getting old! I'm thinking I may need to go horseback riding or a short trip to the ocean. Will see how I feel after the 4th of July party and wedding.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Timebuster

(((TPA))) Very sad to hear of his passing. I would laugh so hard watching the show, Barney Fife as Andy side kick. For safety reasons, Andy only allow Barney to carry one bullet, which he keeps in his shirt pocket until needed. Hilarious. I am glad we can still watch reruns. Rest in peace Andy.

Sorry to hear insurance Co is giving you a hard time. I hope everything goes well with your appointment.

Love ya
TB

Timebuster

(((Amy))) I think you would look great what ever you wear. Are you getting your hair done? Talking about haircuts, its time for me to get my summer cut. Short..lol.

Love ya
TB

Impurrfect

Dad and I were talking about Andy Griffith. My Favorite movie of his was "no time for sargeants" Remember when he had the toilet seats raised to attention I also loved Mayberry (have been through the town it was based on many times) and Matlock.

((TB)) - getting my hair done on Thursday. My hairdresser is a jewel.

We have had many arguments, discussions, etc. about the dog. The motel will not allow ww (wonder wuss) to be in a room by herself, Brat says no one can watch her.

I've declared that I will check on her during the wedding. Dad is the brat's father figure, stepmom is her "mom". Yeah, I'm imprortant, but I'm the one that "takes care of things" and if that means the dog? that's okay. At some point, brat will realize that I was the one who took care of things, no matter what, and I hope that teaches her something.

Tried on my swim suit, it fits just fine I am hoping that I can go to the pool where my classmate buddy lives.

I am very aware that I cannot be staying at home like I am. It's not healthy for me, I need an outlet, and dammit, I'm going to find one...or more.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

Timebuster

(((Tiredofdrugs))) Sarge, how you holding up. Let us know how you feeling/doing..OK.

Love ya
TB