ReadyAndAble

I agree with Received. It's been a long time since I wanted a drink, yet I still stop back here at least a few times a week. It feels good to stay connected to people here, those struggling, and those who found stable ground. It's humbling and somehow reassuring too. And what's better than seeing someone else escape addiction?

Too late, lol... for a second there I thought you were going to start singing the theme from Lion King...

DaveyT

Hey guys, don't worry still sober and on the good path. I didn't post as I needed to sort a few issues out and it kind of slipped my mind. Thanks to everyone for the kind comments and encouragement. My pain meds are helping once more, I cannot even begin to put the pain into words without the meds so I won't bother trying.

The forum really does help. I think without it I would not have even had 3 months sober. So glad I found this place.

DaveyT

Lol Recieved somehow I missed your reply but just saw it. Aww you big lug you, here come on

Nothing wrong with some emotion :P

Cleopatra1

hi davey,,,ive read this whole thread,,and its sooooooooooo interesting,,i lv it,,i lv the fact you are following yr own path,,,im a big beleiver in dontbeat yrself up,,i had a slip up in jan,,,beens sober since 1st nov ,,,,but had a wee slip ,,,no biggy ,,just got rite back on my horse,,,im happier than ive been for a long time,,just wanted to pop in to say hi,,,and keep us posted!!
hugs xx cleo xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

DaveyT

Thanks Cleo, take care of yourself and good luck on your path after your little slip. I really get where you are coming from, I just kicked myself over and over when I failed and all it ever did was cause me to head straight back into that black pit that is a bottle. Since stopping that I feel staying sober is a lot easier.

I hope I will never slip again, but if it occurs, as I have said before, I will just head on over back to the sober path and keep on trekking. That to me is a victory, it may not be perfect, but it won't end up screwing my health and I will achieve total sobriety. Hopefully it will be this time, if not then next time, as long as my life and health are good then I am very happy.

I think it's helped for me to finally come to the realisation that alcohol has no real positives. You know at one point I was using science to excuse my drinking lol. These studies which say a drink a day helps longevity. Of course a single drink turned into 10, but it was a nice excuse to have that first one. Such utter nonsense I can't believe I ever used that excuse.

DaveyT

Just keeping this updated because it seems to help me.

I'm still sober, doing ok. Today wasn't great as I had a few things I needed to push myself to do so I'm aching all over but hey, I got stuff done so that's great

Going to have a nice hot shower because that helps with the pain and then cuddle up with a hot water bottle on the most painful part of me. I haven't been able to do any meditation for the last 3 days and I always notice the difference in pain levels when I don't do a regular practice. So I'm going to dedicate myself to that tomorrow.

As before I intend to update this regularly until I feel myself on a more even path. I've learned things from my previous relapse, notably that when out with friends my guard goes way down and I'm more likely to drink and of course if I screw up I can get back on this sober path easily.

Still I don't go out with friends often, but when I do then I must make an extra effort to stay sober. I'm going to tell everyone I know that the pain meds I'm on mean I can't drink, that should take some pressure off me, even if it's not quite true.

Received

Checking in on you, Davey. Hope things are well.

sunset01

Hey Davey,
Nothing wrong with taking the Positive from the Negative, and moving on. Some days that's the only thing that gets me through. It's a lesson learned and something that you can avoid in the future.

Having said that I'm new to SR, haven't slipped up (early days), and don't subscribe to any program. I just decided I wasn't a drinker anymore, doesn't mean I haven't entertained the notion of having that first drink, I just choose not to. Reading here I've been able to see the pitfalls and have taken steps in my head to avoid them. Practically speaking though I still have to face it when it happens....even though I am completely committed to not reaching for that first drink.

Goodluck to you and congrats on getting back on the bike so quickly, that is something to be proud of!!!

jkb

Hey DaveyT-

Hope you are doing well. Use whatever works for you... RR is just what worked for me. It took away the thoughts of "if I relapse" which was an idea that just kept me drinking... However, we are all unique.

Anyway, hoping you are sober and pain free...

Jess

DaveyT

Yep guys no problems here, still going strong. Had some really awful cravings yesterday but didn't lapse. I couldn't find a way to distract myself from them so just had to ride it out.

DaveyT

Sober today, although I feel a bit bad because I messed up the timing on my medication. I woke up and took my medicine, then I couldn't remember if I took it or not as I was a little groggy when I woke up so I took some more. This resulted in me basically collapsing on my bed as I was completely doped up!

I know some people may find this pleasurable but for me I just felt horrible. I was kind of out of it, hard to describe but it felt like viewing the world through cotton wool, not a nice feeling.

I have purchased a pill sorter thing to make sure this doesn't happen again. It should arrive sometime this week, it's got the days of the week on it so this can't happen again. I'll refill it every sunday.

Received

Yikes! I bought one years ago at the dollar store for...well...a dollar. Haven't needed it in a long time but it sure did help at the time.

I hope you're feeling better.

DaveyT

Yeah I'm feeling better today It was such a silly mistake!

Cleopatra1

Way to go davey doodoos xx hugs xx cleo xxxxxx

DaveyT

My pill thingy should arrive tomorrow. I actually spoke to my doctor as I didn't know if the medications were the kind you could expose to the air as some of them swell up. He said they're all able to be stored safely for 2 weeks at a time after being popped from their blister packs.

As a side note, I don't understand why anyone takes opiates. I made a mistake one day and the feeling was really awful. Being all floaty and detached was just weird. Granted I'm an alcoholic so maybe that has similar symptoms but to me it really wasn't the same. At least when drunk I feel like I'm still present and sharp, although it's a false feeling of course. With the opiates I felt absent and fuzzy, not a nice sensation.

But hey we all have our drugs of choice I guess.

Dee74

glad you got a pill thingy - it's always good to have a healthy respect for your meds I reckon

D

DaveyT

Lol hey I have a healthy respect, I just messed up. It's so easy to forget what you have taken when your illness screws with your pain and energy levels. I'm really happy this didn't end up with me in hospital! I have another week before I end up at the pain clinic again, or it's 9 days I forget. I'm going to discuss some more messing with my medications because lately I feel a bit fuzzy and I'm not enjoying it. I always had a sharp sense of my surroundings, lately I feel like I'm missing things and I don't like it.

Well it's 2am, time to sleep.

Dee74

It wasn't an attack Davey - I was just agreeing that keeping track is a great idea

D

DaveyT

I know Dee, that's why I started the sentence with "lol" :P

DaveyT

Hey guys, still sober but I feel like crap. My head is feeling weird, everytime I take my medication I feel like I'm floating, everything seems fuzzy and weird and I just don't know how to deal with it. After a few hours my mind goes back to normal, but even then I feel like everything is not quite right. My reactions suck, I dropped a cup today and I know without this medicine I would have got to it before it hit the floor. But at the moment I just watched it fall and my reactions were just not alive enough to save it.

It's nice not being in awful pain, but I hate this fuzzy feeling and lack of reaction. I know I need these painkillers but I'm really hoping that the pain clinic can give me something different.