so AC wants to drink in newyears eve

Old 12-20-2013, 11:30 AM
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Angry so AC wants to drink in newyears eve

becouse i will be with my whole famely
i will be in the center city (live 5 houres away)
its a onec a year holiday
EVERYBODY will be drinking,

i wanted to wait until ill ask for help here
but today is my day 2 and yestarday i took the online crash AVTR cours


and yes, i will never drink again and i will never change my mind

and the "pure and naive" expectation of the 31/12 ..... well
thats not ME expecting....
what will happen if i do drink 1 glass of shampain?
(gona drink 2 more botels and go do some drugs becouyse hey its a holiday and hey im in the city and finals are coming and why not for the last time!)

i hate whenn all the others drunk and i dont
what would i do there? its even more tempting becouse its like no one will notic that you drink

so what DO i gonna do?
sleep in 01:00 ?
go sober to party? drive there so i will STAY sober?
maby drink just a littel? though i dont drink and wont change my mind about that?

its not an option not to go
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Old 12-20-2013, 07:24 PM
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Of course you can stay home. You might think that would be a drastic choice, but everything seems pretty minor if the alternative is continuing to drink. And when you stop (you will someday) there will always be some situation like this one where your previous self could not imagine staying sober.

If you've read your AVRT book, you know that it is not you asking about having that glass of champagne. Yep, that is your Addictive Voice, and I know this because it is talking about having another drink. It is not you that is saying this, because you have decided that drinking isn't good for you so you quit. Forever and for good.

If you read your post again, you can see your AV in the brackets, and I think you wrote it like this because you can recognize your AV there too just as I can.

You are probably right that no one will notice if you drink, but I think it is equally likely, and a lot more rewarding, if you understand that no one will care if you don't drink.

You might have thought that those ideas were ridiculous, about what you might do instead of drinking, but they are ALL EXCELLENT IDEAS in that you stay sober and keep to your plan. Well almost all are good ideas. I will leave it to you to decide which one of them is not you, and instead is your AV again.

Since you have control of your arms and other parts of your body, you can make a plan for your success. You can arrive late and leave early, make your appearance, have a lime and soda or tonic, or even bring a bottle of mineral water with you. You can have a plan to take a walk if you start to get panicky. You can pick up your phone as if it is ringing and pretend that there is an emergency and you must leave. You can picture yourself being offered a glass of wine or a cocktail, and saying 'no thanks'. Practice that one in the mirror. No thanks. Firmly and with conviction. On antibiotics. On a cleanse. Have to get up early in the morning. Whatever. Or say nothing at all. Just, No thanks. Plan your arrival, the time, who will be there, what you will do, what you will drink, when you will leave, how you will get home, and an escape plan.

Or you can stay home. But, and this is important I think, you can choose to stay sober. Make a plan so you will succeed at that.
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Old 12-21-2013, 12:30 AM
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I say go and take some club soda or Perrier. A few people cautioned me about triggers in early sobriety but my mind was made up and I wasn't gonna be swayed. And I will say watching others drink never made me want to get drunk. It was the opposite in fact; I could see how idiotic I probably looked drunk.

If you think you will cave, then don't go. But the whole world is gonna keep on drinking with or without you so eventually you'll have to be ready for it.
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Old 12-21-2013, 06:47 AM
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well its my moms house and all the gusts will be there i have no where to leave hhh
but on the otherhand im taking my dog with me so maby i can just (dont laough!) look at him and convince my self that his a litat creature i brought with me and i wouldnt leave him, like a child, like belive that he would be happier if im sober and paying atention to him

i WISH i had the book in israel or atleast in hebrew on anazon
but to be honest
if there was a book like i want...
im scared to read it, you know why

and to be more honest, im this close to give up to AV right now...
free evening, went to the gim, ate well , have now studieng to do, no geting up erly tomorow

like, im amazed from my self- do i actualy dont want it HARD ENOUGH?!!?

what can i do now? take crash coure again? have an advice for critical moments?

thank you so much!!!
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Old 12-21-2013, 06:59 AM
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Advice for those urges and cravings when they come? You bet. Dee put together a great post about urge surfing. There is another great post of his called Thanksgiving Survival Guide. I am sure that the wisdom travels well to other holiday celebrations too.

Your question 'do I want it?' has already been answered, I think. You are at a fork in the road, you can go one of two ways. You must decide and go down the road you must, but that turn is right now. Which way have you chosen?
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Old 12-21-2013, 07:16 AM
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i guess ill ...
i thought im stronger then 3 days

what im thinking is, if im strugeling on day 3,
so EVEN if ill dont drink today
then i will probably drink a week from now anyways
so why should i play this game if i eventualy lose?
or it is getting easyer? i never went pass day 7

can i even say that? is it me? is it AC?
whats happening?
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Old 12-21-2013, 07:20 AM
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Originally Posted by kaisgo View Post
go sober to party? drive there so i will STAY sober?
that may be a very good idea
if we stay totally sober
as we know by now it's not good to drive if drinking

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Old 12-21-2013, 05:24 PM
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Like you Kaisgo, well like everyone reading this we have big holiday plans coming up. I have forks coming from California and we as a group are going to a fancy Christmas Eve buffet. This is at the 4 Seasons Resort plus outside on the lawn. Beautiful warm night, free red or white wine. I am driver to this event, plus tour guide next day early morning. I'm not going to drink except soda water. Plus you will notice after everyone has their 2nd drink they forget you are not me this is so true. Next day you/I wake up and say YESSSSSSSSSSSSS I did it.....clear thoughts and feel great all day...Thanks for your post, it helps everyone including you...
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Old 12-22-2013, 04:10 AM
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Yeah and if you think about it it could be oover in 2 or 3 hours... evcores if you drink youl "party" until the morning but if you decide your NOT drinking you need to have a plan for only coupel of hours ahead.... yoyl probebly ger tired bored and it will be soon all over

The fact that you party drunk for 2 days dosnt mean that if you dont drink your gonna get bored for the same matter of time....
normal people partys last for coupel of hours

I guess grandma will be my chating partner
My dog boris would have me playing with him
I will eat well!( I never ate weel so i could drink more)
If all goes by the plan it could be my first sober chrismes since i was 13 !

And yoy know that they say thae way you start the year it will be the way your whole year will be

And wouldnt we wanted not to start a year drunk!!!!

Who are we????
And what do we want???
Sober christmas!!!
And how are we gonna do it???
Tonic water !!!!!!
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Old 12-22-2013, 06:35 AM
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Now that sounds a lot more encouraging and confident, kaisgo. It shows that you are believing in yourself, and that if you plan well, you can succeed. You must believe you will succeed in order to succeed.

You can do this, and you will. Onward!
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Old 12-29-2013, 05:21 AM
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Thank you freshstart. I finally received the book and started reading it.
I sent you couple of PMs once I received the book.
I had planned to going into rehab and will be admitted tomorrow.
not sure if I will have access to internet for the next few weeks.
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Old 01-03-2014, 12:45 PM
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Saying you will never drink again is a bad omen. I didn't go to a place where they drank for my first 3 years of sobriety. I would stay away.
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