Nikky

hope yall doing well i went three days good but relapsed last night not good sad but happy am doing better

nogard

oooh some sparks - need a tickle y'all?



Its about recovery its "ours" and "we" do this and together and with our wunnerful HP, oh what a gift, its lasts all day and that folsk is enough for me.

Kevin

Dom

I really don't know why Matt is upset with me. I don't consider this being selfish, I consider this being sober.
I felt uncomfortable being with the guys from my past that all I did was do drugs with. I feel that some of you guys think you can still do drugs, in moderation. I'm very happy for you for being 5 days sober from heroin. But someone like me, an addict, I can never use drugs in moderation. I know I will want to continue that feeling of being high.

That's me, that's Dom. I need to do what I'm doing right to stay sober. You know how paranoid I always was, was that cool? Was it fun to hang with me? I was killing myself mentally and physically every single day.

I still love you guys, I still care about you guys, but NOW I know I have to be in a controlled atmosphere to keep myself SANE. You guys know that I want to sign up at the gym August 1st, Kate and I would still like to go bowling with you guys... other things too.

Matt, you know me, you know how I was... was that healthy? I know you and our other friends didn't live in a life of lies, but I did. It's been a drastic change for me.

Hope you guys can forgive me for being "selfish", it's for my own sanity.

I'll always be there for all you guys. If you want to stop doing drugs completely, I can help.

Dom

Keep on fighting, and keep on posting, it helps a lot.

Sazzer

How ya doing, Dom?

Dom

Doing great Sazzer, thanks for asking. How are you?

Today was the best day of work I have ever had. 3 hours into the day I got my first emergency call at another site. The 48 year old journeyman was out sick, and our boss was on vacation. I handled it perfectly and made plenty of phonecalls keeping all my superiors aware of the situation.

I would have never handled myself the way I did if I was on drugs. I'm lucky in so many ways. Tomorrow will be the first day at the gym (can't wait). It'll be a great way to test out my social anxiety. Thanks again for asking about my day.

Sazzer

Good for you! I need to get my butt back to the gym, but "First Things First", as they say!

It's great to have a good day at work, considering you spend most of your time there (how sad is that?)

I am on day 363 of sobriety and can't wait to celebrate my one year!! I'll let you know how it goes so you'll know what you can look forward to in (less than) a year!

Enjoy your evening!! (Sadly, I'm still at work here in CO -- one more hour to go!)

Dom

Way to go Sazzer! I want to make you a happy birthday thread but I'm pretty sure Vic will beat me to it.

caligirl770

Dom
You've got to keep this thread going. I like to read about your progress and minor setbacks. I hope everything is going well with work, Kate, and the Family. Now that everyone is aware about your little problem it will be harder for you to want to use. I know that is the way I felt once my family knew, I didn't want to disappoint them by relapsing.

Keep us posted

Christie

Nevyn

WTG Dom, keep checking in.

Dom

I will! Thank you guys for caring. I never want to use again because of my loved ones, and also my health. No more living in a false reality, numb to my emotions. I feel no more depression, maybe anxiety here and there, but even THAT is lessening. I find myself always in a good mood (because I'm always thinking about doing the RIGHT thing). I don't want to sound selfish, but I'm proud of myself. I feel mentally strong, and now I finally desire to be physically strong too. I'm going to kick social anxiety in the ass tonight at the gym.

Sazzer

No way are you selfish for being proud. You have every right to feel proud!!

Dom

The gym is awesome, I was nervous but at the end of the workout it was all worth it. I couldn't even lift my left arm to the top of the steering wheel on the drive home I KNOW I'm going to sleep good tonight.

I just had a long talk with my Dad, about drugs, temptations, meetings, the whole deal. He is still very concerned about it, it feels very weird talking about drugs with him, but at the same time it feels good. Feels so good to finally be honest. I'm so happy he accepts me for who I am, and forgives me for my past. I love you Dad.

greeteachday

Hey Dom, Just stopping into to say hi. I'm soooo glad you are feeling well and are working recovery. It's terrific that the family is all supportive. Your actions will help rebuild trust and lower the concern. Each day it will be better and better.
the gym is a great diea. Get those endorphins going - great physical and emotional lift. All the best - Keep doing what you're doing!

caligirl770

Hey Dom
Hope you had a good day today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dom

Thanks caligirl. I am able to stay sober, fight off the temptations whenever they arise. Saw my therapist last night alone and had a good time. He's bringing the source of my anxiety to the surface. "Thin is in." It feels good to be sober but the only bad parts of my days are when anxiety takes over.

I want so badly to be over it, but being sober seems to have made my anxiety worse. I don't want to self medicate, the only things I do now to deal with anxiety is listen to loud music while I'm driving, or by going to the gym and leaving myself so exhausted I can't think about anything else. I dislike actually being at the gym, but I love the feeling afterwards. For instance I couldn't even take off my t-shirt last night to take a shower. LOL.

Pattyd

Hi this is my first post and scared to write but I know finding this site is God inspired. I'm going to my first NA meeting and I'm scared of that too, I know I can't do this alone.

pattyd

PaperDolls

Hi there Patty. I'm so glad you found Sober Recovery! For me, it's been my savior. I couldn't have stayed sober without it. You should go to the Newcomers Forum and read the stickies. You might also think about starting a new thread of your own. You might get better responses that way.

I'll send some good thoughts your way.

hugs,
doll

Nevyn

Keep working at it Dom, you are doing great man. Being thin is not all it is cracked up to be (I have a friend who calls me "Tapeworm" - I am 6'2" and around 150lb), stick with the gym and you will get fit though. Nothing beats the feeling of being fit and well.

Hi Patty, welcome to SR. Looking forward to seeing more of you here.

Dom

Hey Patty! Guess what? Your not alone anymore! Keep on posting, and when your ready make a thread of your own. Also feel free to PM me anytime, I have learned so much about myself, and recovery. I'd love to share my info with you and help you!