Sunflowerlife

Love your new picture Weev and I LOVE YOU TOO!
The idea of choice is really rocking my world. I think I'm going to write it down on post it notes and put it all over the house. I need it in more ways than just the food- like when I get irritated with the kids, not having patience is a choice as well

Sunflowerlife

Guys I'm exhausted. I can't seem to catch up from my late night on Tuesday. I didn't sleep well and then my alarm went off at 5 but my toddler called me into his room to snuggle and it was heavenly. I thought I should just try to sleep more and work out at home later instead of going to the gym, but I couldn't fall back asleep.
Going to drink some salt (thanks for the reminder Bimini, I have been slacking) and go meditate until the boys wake up.

I wish you all a lovely day- I went out to dinner with 2 girls from the neighborhood last night- we saw a movie too. It was nice to get out- I ordered a salad at dinner but didn't ask for separate oil and vinegar like I usually do and I think it had honey or something sweet in it. I felt bad after altering the salad so much (no bacon, beans or tortilla strips, extra egg blah blah blah) so I didn't want to ask for more changes. But next time I will.

My oldest, N, has 2 half days and then he's done with kindergarten! Going to take the boys to my parents house after I pick him up. I wish you all a beautiful day!

Sunflowerlife

I just realized that my exhaustion may be from the candida cleanse I started on Tuesday. I was led to it by intuition and wanted to see if it will help with my sugar cravings since I can't seem to go more than 3 days these last few months. I know fatigue is a symptom of die off- I'm curious to know if that is the reason for how I feel today.

ProfessorD

Welcome, emme!

Sunflowerlife

Sunflower, just check in every hour- are you able to do that? (not sure if you work and how easy it is to get to your phone.) Just commit to an hour of abstinence here and keep doing it until you get to bedtime. Or if you can't check in here just tell yourself you will not eat sugar from 8-9 am. When 9 rolls around do the same thing for 9-10. That's what I was doing a couple weeks ago and it helped. I'm sure there will still be days when I need to do that as I'm only on day 3.

Sunflowerlife

How's the day going Weev?? Good luck with your appointment today. I had my first mammogram yesterday, it was interesting. Amazing how they can manipulate a tiny boob in between two plates like that! I imagine big ones are easier...lol.

Sunflowerlife

Congratulations on 6 months of sobriety Emme! It's really great to have you here. It may be helpful to scroll through the older posts for ideas- we talked a lot about keto/low carb in the first few pages. Not everyone feels the need to eat that way but for some of us it's the best way to curb sugar cravings and keep our blood sugar stable throughout the day. Others can learn to eat cleaner without avoiding certain food groups- you will eventually discover what your unique body needs.

Sometimes taking "baby steps" is the best way to start. Like replacing one food that you feel is harming you, with a food that makes your body feel good. Or adding some mindfulness practices to your day/meal times. Can you think of a place you would be able to start?

Sunflowerlife

Let us know how it is Arp! Have you seen "The Magic Pill?" My husband watched it a month or so ago and decided to join me on the keto train afterwards! I still haven't seen it...

Sunflower79

Good morning. ☀️
Welcome Emme

Today is my day 1 and I will be checking in a bunch. Thank you to everyone for all the advice and support yesterday.

Sunflowerlife

I think being less of an A-hole is a great accomplishment lol! I can definitely relate. My a-hole personality comes out when I eat sugar as well- coming off a carb binge makes me into the insane person I was when I was drinking, which is why I'm here. I just don't want to be that person anymore.

Sounds like a lovely morning- going to slip some MCT oil into my tea now to see if it perks me up. Hope you had a great workout

Sunflowerlife

You can do this Sunflower!!! We are here for you!

ProfessorD

Today has begun with a big fight with my husband. I sometimes think it relaxes him to belittle me and make me feel small and stupid. The worst is that I will obsess about this fight all day, and he has probably already forgotten all about it.

Sunflower79

Oh I’m so sorry. I can’t stand mornings like that with my husband. I usually try to remind myself that his nasty mood isn’t about me. He’s just an unhappy man. Can you take a walk outside and get some fresh air? That helps me.

venuscat

Sending love and saying good morning. s

Bethany57

This is me! Thank you for starting this thread! I have been binge eating for the last 30 years! The longest I have gone is 3 weeks. I really think it is a chemical reaction. Sometime I have not even had sugar (tired, depressed or stressed) and I will just CRAVE sugar and carbs...anything I can get my hands on. Weekends are really difficult for me. I am on Day 4 of not binging and would love to join you all with checking in. I do not eat meat so sometimes its difficult to really reduce the carbs.

venuscat

I was too busy yesterday to read properly....sorry.... s

It is ME as well.....I was very big....200 pounds on 5 foot 3 and a half....and I most definitely KNOW that it was a chemical reaction to food rather than any need or want to smoosh down emotions or cope....it STOPPED me from coping.

I struggled for so long....and it was only during a very painful breakup from a 6-yr relationship at 24 that started me on the road I am on now.

I was too upset to eat....and I barely ate for three weeks. When I started again, I found that my tastes and needs had changed. I no longer craved sugar at all....3 weeks had somehow been enough to start re-wiring my body and brain.

I have had times over the years when the addiction took hold again....I don't think there is anyone who can put on weight faster than I can....I guess we all know how it feels to be so full and bloated and miserable and unable to stop....

And here is my confession. Why I started drinking to excess in the first place....it was so I would have permission to eat. Because drunk meant munchies and no off switch....I didn't crave the wine.....I craved the hamburgers and pizza and all things bad I would eat as I drank. I had a one-woman food a thon night after night....

So it is all tied inextricably together....and now that I am sober I can manage it.
Well, that part of it....now I need to sure I eat. One step at a time huh? xx

Sunflowerlife

I'm sorry ProfD- that is not a way to treat your partner and companion. Try your best to change your thoughts when you find yourself replaying the argument. I do the same thing and let it ruin my day- I find if I can stop the thought and just think of something a little bit lighter, it helps.

Sunflowerlife

I can relate as well- While I do believe there is an emotional component to my addictions, I also will randomly crave sugar even when I'm having a "good day" mood wise.

I am a vegetarian doing keto so if you need ideas on meals, feel free to pm me

ProfessorD

I made a big omelette for breakfast. Usually when I fight with my husband or have another trigger that makes me feel rejected and like a loser, I restrict my calories or fast and become really depressed. Then that leads to a binge or worse, a drink. Trying to break that cycle, obviously. Today I will eat 3 meals, even though I feel like restricting to prove to him that I'm worth loving. (Well, that's the absurd logic, anyway).

Geez, I have never actually written out any of these feelings before. It's painful.

venuscat

It is....
But it's good to get it out.....and you know we care.