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Groundhog day

Old 07-02-2017, 02:02 PM
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Groundhog day

Stuck in an endless loop at the minute, not making any real time progress this time.

Brain playing tricks on me "drink tonight Stew, and quit tomorrow"

"How about set a quit day for 3 days time and drink until then"

It's all crap, rubbish AV talk but I'm worn down with this which is why I'm so stuck

I know I'd feel so much better having a few days sober under my belt but how do I begin?

What action needs to happen for me to do this?

I've been drunk for 3 months, either drunk or hungover and I've had enough now, body saying no more. I'm ready but also jaded.

Got to go again tomorrow
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:10 PM
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"I know I'd feel so much better having a few days sober under my belt but how do I begin?"

stewy,id say go back and read your threads and read all the suggestions.

"What action needs to happen for me to do this?"

rehab is probably still not an option yet, eh?
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:24 PM
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Hi stewy 💜

It's nice to see you posting. What have been the triggers for you drinking? I remember reading lots of positive posts from you a little over a month ago about going out for a meal with your daughter and you had listed all the positive things you could do because of your sobriety. What threw you off track?
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:26 PM
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What action needs to happen for me to do this?
Actually, the action that needs to stop happening is picking up the first drink.

I know you're adamantly opposed to rehab, but damn, Stewy! You've been on this merry go round a long time now. When are you going to get off the misery-go-round??
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:33 PM
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Stewy I want to apologize in advance for what I am going to say. I have never been one to sugar coat things, and sometimes to a detriment.

Your alcoholism is progressing along right on schedule, and quite effectively I might add. Only you have the power to stop this madness. You can recieve 1000 responses to this post and it won't keep you from drinking if you don't want to stop. I only hope in a sober moment you can create a plan to get you out of this death spiral. Best wishes.
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:40 PM
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Stewey, I've been doing this for years, and I can relate. I gave a valiant effort this past try getting 15 days in sober, but messed up on Friday. I'm not drinking a lot (2-3 beers), because I want to sober up, but the fact that I can stop there always makes me wonder, and my AV takes over from that point on.

I'm writing things down and it's been helping. It keeps me thinking forward in a positive way, though I'm very hard on myself with this.

It's important to note that we are not alone, and addiction is real. At least we're on here and putting forth some effort, and keeping an eye on our addictions more or less. This weekend has been tough, as I've given myself 4 days off, but I'm finding that struggle and discipline are important in every facet of life in order to enjoy the good things.

It's like a motivational video. "You fail and fail, and finally succeed." I hope someday, both of us will be able to talk about this in a positive way. Perhaps many of us need different approaches toward sobriety, but loving myself and getting rid of an apathetic mentality are most important for me to stay sober. It's freaking hard... But a lot of people do it, which means we can do it!
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Old 07-02-2017, 02:53 PM
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The ball is in your court so to speak Stewy. As others have mentioned, there's really not much anyone here can tell you that hasn't been said many times over. You refuse rehab, you won't go to meetings, you keep pledging to "take action" but never do, and generally just keep drinking every day. You've lost a relationship over your drinking and you have come close to losing your job because of it. Your relationship with your daughter is probably going to be the next casualty.

What's it gonna take for you to actually do something about it? Loss of custody/visitation rights? Getting kicked out of your parent house? Getting fired? I hope none of those things happen but they are very probable if you don't quit screwing around with this. Take some responsibility for yourself and treat this as the emergency that it really is.
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Old 07-02-2017, 03:24 PM
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Stewy, I say this with a great deal of care and concern about your future.

Please, please go to rehab.

You need it, Stewy.
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Old 07-02-2017, 03:50 PM
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Don't wait for the "sober fairy" Stewy. She's not going to show up and fix everything for you. I can relate to your post ... I was stuck in the same endless loop. Kept waiting for someone or something to help me quit drinking.

The answer lies within ... I say this with compassion, my sober fairy never showed up either. Funny thing is... she was here all along, I just didn't know it.

Until you're ready to stop the madness, a million posts won't help you stop. I pray you find your strength, Stewy.
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Old 07-02-2017, 03:51 PM
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Stewy, you begin by saying "NO" to your AV every second and you start NOW.

You don't need to hit rock bottom or wait for a dramatic moment to shift your way of thinking.

You don't wait for actions to happen TO you.

YOU make actions happen - no drama, no big "Aha" moments, no flashy stories.

You just keep grinding through the fog, through all the triggers and temptations. And then you accumulate some sober time under your belt. You start feeling much better. And you keep going, never entertaining a thought "I can handle it now".

You keep making your life better, achieving things you never thought you are capable of. And you keep going even further.

And stay closer to SR - amazing place indeed.

Best wishes to you.
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Old 07-02-2017, 03:52 PM
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Originally Posted by Opivotal View Post
Don't wait for the "sober fairy" Stewy. She's not going to show up and fix everything for you. I can relate to .
I love it, Opi) "Sober Fairy"!
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Old 07-02-2017, 04:03 PM
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Nothing changes if nothing changes Stewy.

I've advised this before but make a list out of all the things you might do - from easiest to hardest from posting here everyday, say, through to Dr, SMART Lifering to AA Meetings, outpatient, inpatient rehab.

I'm sure you can think of other similar things too

If you're still waiting on a counsellor or whatever, you need to take action while that happens.

Don't take waiting for something as action - waiting for the next appointment or the next meeting is not action.

It's in your own best interests to act, and act now.

It's downright dangerous to just let it go and keep drinking while you wait - a lot can happen in a few months.

Make that list.

Start at the bottom - right now.

If you still drink on level one...got to level 2...then 3 and so on....

D
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Old 07-03-2017, 04:26 AM
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Rehab.
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Old 07-03-2017, 04:46 AM
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Come on Stewy ! Pick up the phone or do an internet search, call your doctor. find a place to go and get clean. You need to take action!!!!!

The Merry-Go - Round will stop.... I promise you!
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Old 07-03-2017, 07:48 AM
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Stewy,
Rehab.

I am not sure what you are looking for with the same post time after time? There will not be a different answer to your problem. There will not be any magic here. You have to take the first step. You have to want to be sober and its not when you are drunk. You have to get over the first few weeks of struggle and not reach for a bottle when the temptation arises.

The actions that you are taking will only lead you to one place; losing everything.

At one point, you had stopped posting and got upset with someone over their words. You came back and gave your sobriety some effort. You may leave again if someone says something that is not to your liking.

The merry go round of your emotions and your actions are only keeping you in an unhealthy place and it is becoming detrimental.

I do hope that you will walk away from the alcohol and give yourself the gift of time. Take control of your life, Stewy. Take action and run with it. There is nothing that anyone can say or do for you that you cannot do for yourself. You are steering the boat, Stewy. You are the driver and you can choose what road you are traveling. Please consider a rehabilitation facility to get yourself some time away from alcohol and off the roller coaster.
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Old 07-03-2017, 08:04 AM
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Hey Stewy,

Glad you posted. I'm praying for ya! Time to give it to God and begin making the right decisions. As Dee said, "there's no change without change". MAKE it happen...you have it within you Stewy. JFDI!

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Old 07-03-2017, 08:12 AM
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Originally Posted by Stewy84 View Post
What action needs to happen for me to do this?
What action are you going to take to make it happen?

I waited 25 years for God to miracle my butt sober. Things progressed much faster on the sober road when I stopped waiting for actions to happen and started to work for it.

You can do this!

Rootin for ya!
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Old 07-03-2017, 08:54 AM
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Any changes planned for today Stewy? You are the only one who can make it happen. We can help but you have to start making the effort to change.
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Old 07-07-2017, 09:35 AM
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just wanted to bump this and have this question posed to ya again,stewy, as i see your stoppin in daily.
hope ya decided to make it happen,stewy.


Originally Posted by ScottFromWI View Post
Any changes planned for today Stewy? You are the only one who can make it happen. We can help but you have to start making the effort to change.
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Old 07-07-2017, 09:45 AM
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Same question as tomsteve.

Thinking of you, Stewy.

Hope that good things are happening.
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