Ruby2

Finally caught up.

MNL I was going to ask why you went to the party. I avoided stuff like that in the beginning. Still do, for that matter. If I have to go, I plan ahead. And always have a drink in hand. Diet Coke, iced tea, fizzy water, something non alcoholic.

Mecanix, good to see you. A friend's two daughters went to a Renaissance Faire today and the Pokemon Go players are apparently out in force at Ren Faire.

My daughter wants constant entertainment. I should have gone to clown school. I'm taking her to open swim at the park later on.

Upward2Enlightenment

It's horrible to look at the news anymore. Three officers dead and 3 wounded in Baton Rouge.

brynn

I'm glad you're here, MNL, and I'm glad you've nipped this thing quickly! Like bim and others have mentioned, the best and most effective self talk is I'll never drink again no matter what! Kinda puts the brakes on any argument cause there is none. 'No mater what' pretty much covers it!

And I'm very mindful of the grassy knoll cause of the tourists trying to get themselves run over while attempting to stand in the street in the exact spot JFK was shot!

My boss is out of town this week which means very slow and boring. I might take a short online class next week...guess I better start investigating.

brynn

Thoughts and prayers for the victims and their families in Baton Rouge.

Soberwolf

World has gone mad theese last few weeks

LBrain

yes, they are so mine... but seriously folks...

they are a variety of long cucumbers not necessarily suyo, but I think they are... I grabbed a couple 'small' ones because there are lots and they'll get huge... being too close to the ground they curl...

Js, you had me blushing, for a second I thought you said you wish you were Brain's wife... ,
sometimes I read what you do and think, I wish I had Bodhi's life. I think we should all be grateful we are able to enjoy our own lives free from alcohol and having the ability and choice to be happy.

And speaking of choice, MNL -- how about instead of saying, "I had a slip," use, "I chose to drink." After all, it was a choice. It's not like that drink accidentally got poured into your mouth and you swallowed it.
Then thinking, well I already drank, might as well drink more... glad you didn't. I liken that to someone who got hit by a car then decides to run in front of a truck cause they were already hit by a car...

Potamus... it depends on how many Jap beetles you have, if you are SWARMED by them, lock your doors and pray... if it is the occasional jb or 'some' frequenting... try a mix of garlic, dish soap and lemon or cayenne pepper, I think your place is big enough to put up a japanese beetle trap or 2... but you gotta put them as far away from your plants as possible, a couple hundred feet would be nice... don't ever put one among your stuff, all it does is attract them, better to attract them away from you...
get one of them thar spray bottles from the dollar store or wherever... in a blender, pulverize a whole head of garlic, then blend it some more with water, let it sit over night then strain it into the spray bottle - 13 ounces for a 16 oz sprayer, squeeze in a lemon OR add a teaspoon of powdered cayenne pepper - then add about an ounce of dish soap - 2tbsp, shake it up, spray your leaves with it

you could even toss a sliced up lemon into the blender - especially the rind...

MissNewLife

oh good lord. the guy i was with last night called the cops and filed a missing person report and gave them my families phone number.... now my parents are going to get a call and scare the living crap out of them because i don't even have a phone to call the cops or anyone to clear this up!!! UGHHH

MissNewLife

You guys are right I go back on my decision to not drink time and time again. Isn't part of that what makes us alcoholics though? I mean, if it were so easy to just never drink again what would even make people alcoholics in the first place? they would just never drink again.

brynn

Oh no MNL! Can you email them? Or email someone who can call them for you? Oh I feel for you sweetie ugh!!

biminiblue

Exactly.

If you are willing to accept defeat that easily, you're going to have a very hard time of it.

You're already an alcoholic and it has nothing to do with whether you drink or not. It's just a fact.

Stop drinking and you won't ever have to worry about the consequences of that part of you.

And, yes. You just never drink again. Ta Da. It's over.

brynn

MNL....it's not easy to quit drinking but the formula is simple. The only way I can assure myself that no booze will pass my lips is to make a decision to never drink again no matter what and stick to it. I also had to recognize my AV for what it is and know that it does not have my best interests in mind. It wants to feed the beast...the primal part of my brain that is only interested in self indulgence. I choose to live on a higher plane now and take control of my thoughts and actions. It's a shift in thinking more than anything.

Check out Rational Recovery if you're interested. There are also great resources in the Secular Connections forums here on SR.

And yes what Brain and bim said. It's a choice, plain and simple.
Xoxo

Venecia

Oh my! (Why doesn't that surprise me, though. )

Oh oh. That sounds like a take on the old "relapse is a part of recovery," which is one of the biggest fallacies out there. You do need to do things to care for yourself, which means parties and bars are a very bad idea. Stick with us. You can do this and you have our support. We all had a Day One, too. This can be your last one ever, but it takes some decisions about the places you go and the people you hang out with.

Tetra

I'm back in town after the weekend at my parents and I'm lonely right now. On Friday I didn't want to leave here and this evening I didn't want to come back. I know it's stupid and things will settle down tomorrow when I return to work. Is this how things are going to be now - always wanting to be in the other house no matter where I am? I still don't feel like I have a 'home'.

Melina

MNL, ugh you drank! I know that sucks...

Well listen, here's a red flag... Planning trips where drinkers will be, etc...

It's hard but sometimes you have to hermitize a bit at the beginning until you have stable sober ground. Sobriety isn't about simply removing the alcohol.

It's doing the work of self care and self awareness so you know where you are safe and with whom. And that takes a while. It's not forever and you're not depriving yourself. It's good self protection.

I know this bc I've relapsed and I've been around some great recovery and I've white knuckled it and all shades in between.

It's a lot of work to build a life in true recovery but it's worth it.

See the chaos that immediately ensues when you drink? It sucks.

I stick around here for support. And I'm not perfect, I'm coming off a relapse that was so stupid and selfish.

I'm working on coping skills so that when I feel overwhelmed or I want to check out mentally, I have other options that are more attractive than drinking. It's a battle bc my disease wants me drinking and dead. But I know I can have an amazing life if I keep working on my sober skills.

Xoxo stay with us!

Tetra

As Behan said earlier: congratulations to Galway for winning European Capital of Culture 2020. It is a pretty place (mostly). Here is Galway by night.

Tetra

Culture flows through the city just like the River Corrib

Tetra

One last one: the sun breaking through the clouds in Salthill.

Behan

Evening all,

I reiterate and underline all of the sterling support and wisdom you have gotten here MNL!

Best of luck with the car project Sao, if you purchase it.

Afternoon here was fiercely sunny. Went for a big long drive and found a tiny town near the coast called Coney Island. I think there is a Coney Island outside of New York?

Hawkeye13

Your new place will feel like home more and more Tetra--be patient and give it some time.

You're still adjusting to everything and all is still new, including the job,
being out on your own, new housemates, trying to separate kindly
from parents, and so on.

It's natural to feel a bit lost as those things settle.

What about taking a trip out to the the Aran Islands, or a hike somewhere with friends next weekend?

Soberpotamus

I'm not swarmed yet (at least, I don't think I am!). They are on my peach colored carpet roses only. Two bushes. They aren't on the coral drift roses at all. I looked at neem oil, some trapping bags, and milky spore. And then a regular poisonous spray. It says milky spore is for early prevention, and neem oil is best used early spring as well. I guess I'm stuck with the poison and the bags.

So place the bags a couple hundred feet away then?

I have a few of those large spray bottles in the pantry. I have the garlic, lemon, cayenne and Dawn soap.