loulou1981

Wow, uve .ade some great progress already & i can already sense the lift in ur state of mind!!!! ALL my relationships have improved over the last 6 weeks, wish id got sober sooner!

thomas11

Enfin, I am so relieved that things at work went well and you were even able to be a little lighthearted about it. That must have been such a huge relief. Congrats on taking action. This thread was rather heart wrenching for awhile. I felt so bad for you.

enfinthechange

It's morning and I slept so a bad, a.duvet of guilt I guess. I am.off on a field trip with students till tomorrow, so that will give my husband some space. .... he didn't want to come to bed last night after his film... it must be so tough for him . He has to go back to work today and is probably very worried about people knowing. His job is really hard.
However knackered is not hungover. I told my colleague no sneaky beers tonight, so that's out of the bag. ... she will also support me and let me waffle on. Maybe I can gain some more clarity.
The road is going to be a long one my friends.... I can forgive and forget quickly and don't sulk, but my husband is going to take a long time to get over this.... if he ever does. So I need to now learn patience too. Another weak point!
Have a great day everyone xxx

Healthygoals

Hang in there, been thinking a lot about you. We've all done something awful under the influence, myself included. Hope things improve!

enfinthechange

Managed another day, but now in a youth hostel with a bar, tired, feeling really sad inside and am tempted to **** it all, start again tomorrow.... but I'm going to try not to. Play the tape through and I owe it to my husband to be sober to prove to him I am.not actually the biggest ******** ever!!! Be strong enfin be strong....

enfinthechange

Plus husband still not talking to me so I really want to drink now.....arghhhhhhhh

Hawkeye13

Drinking will simply compound the problem
and not improve anything.

You tighten your belt and stay sober
there is a lot at stake here both for you and your marriage enfin

Quit listening to that stupid addictive voice which is trying to ruin your life. . .

Ruby2

Drinking will only throw fuel on the fire. I'm glad you posted instead of picking up a drink. Don't do it. It's not the solution to the problem, it is the problem.

If you're tired, have a nice light meal, rest a bit. Maybe do some stretching. Take a leisurely walk. Have some ice cream. Take care of hungry, angry, lonely, tired HALT the urge. You can do it

JoeCree

I think youre going to have to give ur husband time on this one. And there is no limit. Its out of your hands now and all you can do is work on urself. If wants to talk then talk, if he asks a question then answer honestly. You will find with time that things will sort themselves out for the better as long as you remain sober.
I may be lost in translation somewhere but when you first explained ur story i thought you had slept with the guy, which would have been more difficult to rectify. As it stands i think your husband will be able to forgive you on this one, as long as you can show you are going to change. And start anew.

OpenTuning

Hi Enfin, hang tough in there and stay away from alcohol. I'm sure you know drinking to deal with the problems caused by drinking doesn't make a lot of sense. Your AV wants a drink, that's absolutely fine, just don't give it any. You're the one in control. And you know you can't drink any more.

SoberLeigh

Stay strong and determined, enfin; whatever happens, don't drink; it will only set you back and could make things much worse.

We are here for you.

SoberLeigh

It's likely going to take your husband some time to work through what has happened.

Continued sobriety and recovery are your strongest allies at this time (and always).

KissMyTiara

Besides the guilt about your husband please remember you are a teacher and chaperone to your school kids. You owe them a sober teacher no matter what.

enfinthechange

I have tea!!!!!+ score! !!!

IronPhoenix

I am so into tea now as well!!!

enfinthechange

You are all right as ever, so wise ... and I am.sober... bit full up as ate a tonne... battered gherkins. .. new for me but v nice!!! Am well happy...
And I know I must be patient.... I'm not very good at that.... night x

sobermax

This thread has warmed my heart. My thoughts are with you and your husband, Enfin.

Perhaps this difficult event will be a catalyst for positive change in your relationship.

Anyway, delighted for you that things seem easier and that you didn't 'press the f**k it button' and pick up.

I do not envy your youth hostel gherkins.

Worried75

Will take your husband time - is hard but I do echo everyone else saying well done for not drinking.

Maybe he will open up come the weekend

OpenTuning

Well done for the tea and battered gherkins. Not a combination I've tried before, but whatever works

Just one thing, make sure your progress isn't conditional on anything your husband does or doesn't do. You have no control over that. You do have control over whether or not you take that first drink. The good thing is that the longer you're sober, and prove by your actions that you don't want anything like that to happen again, the more likely things will improve between you.

enfinthechange

After a lovely day I am nearly home, and the anxiety is peaking...I can't hardly bear to walk back into his company. .. I am shitting bricks. I have been playing the future scenarios though over and over... it's all so bad... I dint know what to do. I have sent 4 texts today and I replies. ... I think it may be bad
.
. I keep thinking of the pub near home....happy people, beer... no angry sadness. I have got to face it. Head up high... I not got to be weak, Cowtow and grovel. I am good at things, I am nice without booze, I am worth something. .. I am..... please let it be OK.