After a lovely day I am nearly home, and the anxiety is peaking...I can't hardly bear to walk back into his company. .. I am shitting bricks. I have been playing the future scenarios though over and over... it's all so bad... I dint know what to do. I have sent 4 texts today and I replies. ... I think it may be bad
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. I keep thinking of the pub near home....happy people, beer... no angry sadness. I have got to face it. Head up high... I not got to be weak, Cowtow and grovel. I am good at things, I am nice without booze, I am worth something. .. I am..... please let it be OK.