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Class of January 2019 part 6

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Old 03-26-2019, 10:51 PM
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Class of January 2019 part 6

Continues from

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums...rt-5-a-20.html (Class of January 2019 part 5)

D
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Old 03-27-2019, 01:49 AM
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Thanks Dee!

How are you doing Listae?

Bonnie, how are things with your mother?

Sophie, you feeling after the scones?

RAL, hope things are going well with you.

The group has gone silent.
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Old 03-27-2019, 03:56 AM
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Jumping onto the next thread Frogger style
Thanks Dee!
Hola H379
Get in here everybody else
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-Z
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Old 03-27-2019, 07:05 AM
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Good morning, all!

I’m still here; just haven’t had much time to post/keep up. I’m doing well on 80 something days. I guess it will be 3 months on Sunday. Pretty amazing! Longest I have ever gone since I started my wine craze 17 years ago. I’m in this for the long haul, as in forever. Will not go back to the darkness.

It’s our spring break so I’m taking opportunity to paint and get my home a bit more organized.

Love to all of you. You are doing so wel. those that have relapsed along the way, congrats on getting right back to this. We are here because we want sobriety more than the addiction.
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Old 03-27-2019, 02:05 PM
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Hello everyone. Thank you for the new thread, Dee! Hopping over along with Zig

My scones were a success and I'm feeling much better. It might sound silly but making something well made me feel less useless. Work things have been quiet for a few weeks and then today and yesterday I got a whole lot busier but I am handling it and I am relatively calm.

H - Hope you are settling in well and getting your furniture sorted.

Quitnow - It sounds like you have a nice mix of fun and organising planned for spring break - I hope it goes well!

Love to you all and hope you sleep well x
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Old 03-27-2019, 03:26 PM
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Hey all,

Sophie I'm so glad your scones were a success and that you're feeling better.

Quitnow congrats on 80+ days

Hi Zig, H379 and everyone else

I'm doing OK right now, glad the workday is over so I can collapse on my couch and watch Queer Eye. I was really struggling this morning. I've been feeling depressed today for no reason I can put my finger on:

Things are going great with my boyfriend, he invited me to a friend's birthday party Friday night and his grandmother's birthday on Saturday, which means we'll probably spend both nights together this weekend.

Things are great at work, I'm finally over my pre/post vacation crunch and have been able to focus more on my supervisory responsibilities, which I was neglecting because I was so busy with my own reports.

Things are great with my friends, I've gotten to see them all in the past week, and I talk to one of my closest friends every day because we work together.

And yet, sometimes I just feel unaccountably down/sad and unmotivated to do anything. I really had to drag myself out of the house this morning. I'm proud of myself that I made it to work, because I seriously considered calling in sick. I didn't get everything done that I would've liked to, but I got some things done, which is a lot better than not going at all.

I don't like this feeling and I'm not used to it. I know that the suggestion might be therapy or medication, but I am really resistant to seeking help. I'm a social worker and I feel like I should have my sh*t together, I am helping others after all. But I also know this feeling isn't rational and I don't really know what else to do about it.

Sorry for the extremely long ramble. I don't really feel like I can talk to anyone in my actual life about this, because I just don't want them to know. I feel like having had to quit drinking is enough of a stigma and i just don't think I can stand to be seen as any more high maintenance than that.

OK, looong post over.
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Old 03-27-2019, 03:38 PM
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Dear soberbythesea - each of us is human, not "high maintenance".

Each of us has different strengths and challenges.

Each of us needs times of unalloyed joy and peace in our lives - what might these look like for you?

We're here for you
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Old 03-27-2019, 10:16 PM
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Wow. We've made it to Part 6. I feel better today and did not drink.

I need to accept that my job is over and move into action on finding a job.

I'm grateful to the group and SR.
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Old 03-28-2019, 03:54 AM
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Just a quick hello to the January folk
Have a great, sober day!
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Old 03-28-2019, 05:52 AM
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Soberbythesea.

Everyone has ups and downs. However, staying off the booze is a big deal and a great accomplishment. In the long run everything in your life will get better with sobriety.

My quit date is the same as yours. My biggest problem is becoming complacent and underestimating the power of alcohol. I read Canfield and Andrew's "30-Day Sobriety Solution" a little every day.
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Old 03-28-2019, 08:15 AM
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Hello everyone

SBTS - I'm afraid I don't have much advice but I can completely relate to that inexplicably 'down' feeling where every task seems to take a huge amount of effort. I also appear to everyone that I have my sh*t together although that is not always the case, and am what I call 'spiritually bankrupt' so I'm not into motivational affirmations and it was a big step for me to start seeing a counsellor.

I think we are cut out of the same pattern and it makes me feel a little better that I'm not alone. Hopefully you feel the same. Love to you, hope you have a better day tomorrow x
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Old 03-28-2019, 04:06 PM
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Thanks everyone. Today was a better day.
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Old 03-28-2019, 06:08 PM
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Hi SBTS

I dunno about anyone else but it took me a while to understand that non-alcoholics have bad days too.

I drank to avoid those downs - so I instinctively assumed other people had ways of avoiding the downs too.

I don't think they do - I think, by and large they just plod on and get through them.

For a while, I almost felt like my recovery wasn't working if I had a down day...but I got used to it

The good thing is now I only have bad days or bad patches - not bad years or decades.

Glad things are a little better today
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Old 03-28-2019, 07:24 PM
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I saw my addiction therapist today and told her that I didn't have the happiest week. I'm nearing ninety days (probably like some others) and actually feel really irritated/angry. This is probably the most angry that I've felt since getting sober in January.

The addiction therapist said that it's normal for people around 90 days to have the pink cloud and newness of sobriety fade. She said often this is the time that one starts to face some "big tests."

I have to admit that I've been thinking: "Well, now that I'm at ninety days, I can switch to harm reduction." A co-worker who I don't really even know very well but I respect invited me to have a drink. I've been thinking: "Okay, yeah. I'll have a drink with her."

She is also someone who likes to drink and told me that she finds it frustrating that so many people don't drink. So, I guess my need to be a "people pleaser" came into high gear.

I don't actually want to drink and I'm not going to right now. However, I am having these thoughts.
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Old 03-29-2019, 04:31 AM
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Good morning class!
Listae ~ I know how you feel regarding the fading pink cloud. I think it just becomes more elusive. Freshly sober folks like us have to seek it out now, rather than wake up and being enveloped in it like before. You've made a major, major life change, and absolutely are headed towards a much better existence. I hope you can forge any anger into strength and stay sober. Not easy, but definitely worth it! I think I speak for everyone in this class when I say we don't want you to drink. So *people please* us instead
Take care everyone!
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-Z
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Old 03-29-2019, 04:36 AM
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I have to admit that I've been thinking: "Well, now that I'm at ninety days, I can switch to harm reduction."
Please don't confuse abstinence for control listae.
They are not the same thing.

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Old 03-29-2019, 08:47 AM
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Originally Posted by Dee74 View Post
Please don't confuse abstinence for control listae.
They are not the same thing.

D
Wise words Dee. Very appreciated!
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Old 03-29-2019, 01:12 PM
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Hello everyone! Hope you are well

Listae - I am approaching 90 days sober too and I can definitely relate. That stupid voice that says, 'Maybe I don't really have a problem,' 'Maybe I can drink occasionally,' 'Just tonight won't hurt.' I have to accept that I can never drink again. Not in moderation, not only on certain occasions, not on holiday, not ever.

So I tell that voice to STFU.

We deserve to be happy, healthy and sober. Stay strong. You're doing great x
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Old 03-29-2019, 01:17 PM
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Yes, sobersophie! Thanks for the reminder.

I guess the fact that I'm even thinking and planning for "harm reduction" shows that I'm an alcoholic or whatever term best suits someone who has had seizures, job loss, acute health issues, embarrassment, a DUI, loss of friendships, chronic depression, etc.

I have to think of all the things that have slowly improved in my life over the last 90 days.

So, yes, you are right. Plus, I've been in a terribly irritable mood this week. So, it is definitely NOT the time to pick up a drink. Because I would drink to medicate and sedate.
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Old 03-29-2019, 01:24 PM
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You are right on the money!

Why would you trade a life without all that misery for a bottle of actual poison? Any hint of a voice telling you that is a good idea is an idiot.

It sounds like you are feeling much stronger
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