Class of November 2018 Part 2
Member
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: London, England
Posts: 7,064
Hi still here and reading all the posts with interest. You are all doing so well.
Day 24.
Yesterday I actually went on a walk with a "meetup" group. Only five people turned up but that was fine with me.
As most of you know I spend 90% of my time alone at home so it was lovely to be out with people and having conversations.
I was on my way home and realised that I had barely thought of drinking all day. Although that thought in itself did then trigger drinking thoughts.
Also a vegan lady was telling me about when she had been tricked by an ex boyfriend into eating dairy, my instant reply was that would be like putting alcohol in someones drink that had given up drinking, I don't think she could see the comparison at all, it was just my alcoholic brain.
I am tired today, even though I walked miles yesterday I didn't sleep well. I was getting cravings in the middle of the night with thoughts of getting up, dressed and out to the local 24 hour supermarket to buy some poison!
Stay Sober everyone X
Day 24.
Yesterday I actually went on a walk with a "meetup" group. Only five people turned up but that was fine with me.
As most of you know I spend 90% of my time alone at home so it was lovely to be out with people and having conversations.
I was on my way home and realised that I had barely thought of drinking all day. Although that thought in itself did then trigger drinking thoughts.
Also a vegan lady was telling me about when she had been tricked by an ex boyfriend into eating dairy, my instant reply was that would be like putting alcohol in someones drink that had given up drinking, I don't think she could see the comparison at all, it was just my alcoholic brain.
I am tired today, even though I walked miles yesterday I didn't sleep well. I was getting cravings in the middle of the night with thoughts of getting up, dressed and out to the local 24 hour supermarket to buy some poison!
Stay Sober everyone X
Member
Join Date: Mar 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 67
[QUOTE=ClearPath64;7061795]AV just smacked me up side the head. Took my son up to get him some food and, driving home, caught a glimpse of one of the liquor/grocery stores that were on my rotation. I haven't eaten yet this evening, and the rest of the night, after he goes back to his Mom's, is wide open. The thought of a six-pack quickly popped into my head. No, no, no. He just left, and SR was my first stop. Second stop is the kitchen, and a plate of nachos. Then some TV. I've got this.
Morning all. This was me yesterday early evening too CP. I picked my daughter up from school with my son and then we had to venture out to pick an extra large “Kevin the Carrot” (giant soft toy carrot) up from our local Aldi store UK. The store is donating money to the teenage cancer trust and my kids have been loving the advert so I thought, why not?😊
This is how it went..... Tonne of traffic to get to store= stress
Took a wrong turning=stress
Rammed car park=stress
Kids running in to store like wild animals=stress
Fear of no more Kevin’s left on the shelf=stress
Kids see Kevin in the distance and run=stress
Kids rip 2 large Kevin’s off shelf and turn into
Psycho kids=stress
As my kids were writhing around on the store floor with their adopted carrots I look up and the alcohol is staring right at me. My head went and I was thinking, just get some cans of beer, you will be ok with that. The chat in my head was going for it. I decided that I was not going to buy any and if I still felt the same on the route home I could always stop at my local shop and grab some beer.
After queuing up to pay and carrying 2 large Kevin’s out of the store so their feet didn’t drag on the dirty floor I then had to contend with trying to get them in my car, without my car door hitting the closely parked car next to me. OMG....I cannot put into words the volcano that was rumbling inside me.
The journey home was alcohol thought provoking..... my son every 2 seconds.....Mum Mum look at Kevin, Mum Mum can you see what Kevin is doing......Mum Mum Kevin is looking out the window......Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum Aaaagh, my head nearly exploded and I nearly stopped and threw Kevin off the bridge into the river.
As I neared home and my local shop was in the distance I made a decision that I was going to stop, I was going to get the beer and I deserved it after my stressful Kevin time.
Then, something kicked in...my mind went 100 miles an hour playing out the rest of the evening and tomorrow and coming on here and feeling the regret of drinking after doing so well. It was not a pretty sight and then I just kept repeating in my head, get home, get dinner done ASAP, eat and chill. I was really hungry and tired and I just needed some peace without the kids in my ear. It was carnage when I got home but I done the dinner and we ate and then we chilled ( well, chill as much as you can with an 8and 6 year old high on “Kevin”)
I did it though and to get through my Friday evening this week after the horrendous Friday eve I had last week which included alcohol is a miracle. This time last week I opened my eyes with all the sick regrets of the night before. This morning I feel alive and am so grateful for you guys who are helping me each day to stay sober. Even when I am not online I think about you all during my day and that is really helping me.
Starting day 8 with my beautiful kids and Kevin of course and going to take things at a slow pace today. We have a cowboy and Indian dress up roller disco this eve to go to so that’s part of my evening taken care of.
Thank you to all you amazing people on here that are giving me the strength to do this. Wishing you all a good day
Morning all. This was me yesterday early evening too CP. I picked my daughter up from school with my son and then we had to venture out to pick an extra large “Kevin the Carrot” (giant soft toy carrot) up from our local Aldi store UK. The store is donating money to the teenage cancer trust and my kids have been loving the advert so I thought, why not?😊
This is how it went..... Tonne of traffic to get to store= stress
Took a wrong turning=stress
Rammed car park=stress
Kids running in to store like wild animals=stress
Fear of no more Kevin’s left on the shelf=stress
Kids see Kevin in the distance and run=stress
Kids rip 2 large Kevin’s off shelf and turn into
Psycho kids=stress
As my kids were writhing around on the store floor with their adopted carrots I look up and the alcohol is staring right at me. My head went and I was thinking, just get some cans of beer, you will be ok with that. The chat in my head was going for it. I decided that I was not going to buy any and if I still felt the same on the route home I could always stop at my local shop and grab some beer.
After queuing up to pay and carrying 2 large Kevin’s out of the store so their feet didn’t drag on the dirty floor I then had to contend with trying to get them in my car, without my car door hitting the closely parked car next to me. OMG....I cannot put into words the volcano that was rumbling inside me.
The journey home was alcohol thought provoking..... my son every 2 seconds.....Mum Mum look at Kevin, Mum Mum can you see what Kevin is doing......Mum Mum Kevin is looking out the window......Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum Mum Aaaagh, my head nearly exploded and I nearly stopped and threw Kevin off the bridge into the river.
As I neared home and my local shop was in the distance I made a decision that I was going to stop, I was going to get the beer and I deserved it after my stressful Kevin time.
Then, something kicked in...my mind went 100 miles an hour playing out the rest of the evening and tomorrow and coming on here and feeling the regret of drinking after doing so well. It was not a pretty sight and then I just kept repeating in my head, get home, get dinner done ASAP, eat and chill. I was really hungry and tired and I just needed some peace without the kids in my ear. It was carnage when I got home but I done the dinner and we ate and then we chilled ( well, chill as much as you can with an 8and 6 year old high on “Kevin”)
I did it though and to get through my Friday evening this week after the horrendous Friday eve I had last week which included alcohol is a miracle. This time last week I opened my eyes with all the sick regrets of the night before. This morning I feel alive and am so grateful for you guys who are helping me each day to stay sober. Even when I am not online I think about you all during my day and that is really helping me.
Starting day 8 with my beautiful kids and Kevin of course and going to take things at a slow pace today. We have a cowboy and Indian dress up roller disco this eve to go to so that’s part of my evening taken care of.
Thank you to all you amazing people on here that are giving me the strength to do this. Wishing you all a good day
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 7,097
Morning everyone. Happy Sober Saturday.
Amanda - I really was lol ing at your experience with kevin! I'd never heard of him until yesterday. it was o our local news. There was a photo of him sitting in a police car too! Glad you got through the day and didn't pick up.
Kaily - great to read you went out and met people yesterday. I'm sure sleep will come in time. It's often the way isn't it the days we get loads of exercise and think we will sleep well we just dont
TJ - ah twins sound lovely. They fascinate me so much
Clearpath - great result on getting through the AV -well done to you. you 1-AV 0!
Sweeti - hope you slept well and are onto day 5 by the time you read this
Welcome Broncosys .
Bonnie - at least you were sober and present whilst bowling even if you didn't win. Hope you had fun
Congrats on 2 weeks obosob
strawberry-great to see you checking in and congrats on 2 weeks
Breakfree-how are you doing? Is it next weekend you are away? how are you feeling about it now?
Mechanic-how are you doing? We miss your posts. Hope you're ok and check in soon.
Saturday again. It's quite a decent morning here so going to get a walk and chop some wood I might put a flannel shirt on Sorting some clothes out for the charity shop. Having a good clear out is so therapeutic I've lost 17 pounds now too so getting rid of fat clothes determined never to be in them again.
Hope everyone has a great day.
RALx
Amanda - I really was lol ing at your experience with kevin! I'd never heard of him until yesterday. it was o our local news. There was a photo of him sitting in a police car too! Glad you got through the day and didn't pick up.
Kaily - great to read you went out and met people yesterday. I'm sure sleep will come in time. It's often the way isn't it the days we get loads of exercise and think we will sleep well we just dont
TJ - ah twins sound lovely. They fascinate me so much
Clearpath - great result on getting through the AV -well done to you. you 1-AV 0!
Sweeti - hope you slept well and are onto day 5 by the time you read this
Welcome Broncosys .
Bonnie - at least you were sober and present whilst bowling even if you didn't win. Hope you had fun
Congrats on 2 weeks obosob
strawberry-great to see you checking in and congrats on 2 weeks
Breakfree-how are you doing? Is it next weekend you are away? how are you feeling about it now?
Mechanic-how are you doing? We miss your posts. Hope you're ok and check in soon.
Saturday again. It's quite a decent morning here so going to get a walk and chop some wood
I might put a flannel shirt on Sorting some clothes out for the charity shop. Having a good clear out is so therapeutic I've lost 17 pounds now too so getting rid of fat clothes determined never to be in them again.Hope everyone has a great day.
RALx
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 78
Originally Posted by BreakFree 
I oftentimes don’t share my feelings about my personal life because the internet can be so limiting in terms of communication and being misunderstood is very frustrating for me and I usually just give up trying (to be understood, that is). I am trying to work through that.
I'm on day 22 (had to count them I don't even keep track anymore). My life has been insane lately and it's going to get even worse soon. Its all work/real estate related and its been extremely stressful. I knew this would be difficult and it's part of the reason why I stopped drinking. I knew I would need a clear head for this. Some very difficult decisions/conversations/deals had to be made and I'm very proud and happy to say that everything seems to be working out even better than I had hoped. There is still a LOT of work to do next month but come January everything should be in order and somewhat back to normal. On top of that work has exploded due to winter finally coming here and as a car mechanic that spells overtime. In fact I have to go to work in a few hours (hate working weekends). So I haven't been around here much.
I feel for all you Americans with your three holidays in a row, such madness/temptations and not to mention stress. Seems everybody here is doing well! Very proud of all of us here. This site brings a certain peer pressure but in a good way. I can't fall of the wagon if nobody else does! Strength in numbers. That said its still not easy for me. Yesterday evening I REALLY wanted a drink (or 15) Made a ton of money made a bunch of people happy worked my ass of drove home and at sat down and didn't get to reward myself. Played the tape forward but couldn't really see the harm in it, I knew that I didn't have to get up early anyway. Only thing that stopped me was that I didn't want to start over with my day count and I would have to come here and admit to everyone that I screwed up. It still sucked but went to bed early sober as a judge.
Yesterday around 15:00 I left my workshop to drive a car inside to service it and in my parking lot where two guys squatting down hiding behind my dumpster out of sight for everybody drinking the cheapest beer there is. Now normally I would tell them to GTFO in no uncertain terms (My place is family orientated and I try to make people feel safe and welcome for normal families with children and I don't want a bunch of drunks hiding around in the parking lot) but I had still had some super strong beer on my boat which is also in my shop so I got two cans of that and gave it to them and told them to enjoy that somewhere else. They didn't speak any of the languages that I speak but they gave me a smile and a thumbs up and left. I still can't decide if that was a nice or horrible thing I did but they seemed happy enough.
Anyway it's back to the grindstone for me now an keep up the good work everyone!
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 771
Good morning, everyone. I’m on day 12.
Yesterday was an excellent day for me. After bowling, which was so much fun, we all went out to dinner. My husband, son, younger daughter, and I were all making each other laugh so hard. It feels good to know that it’s possible to enjoy things while sober.
Ive decided to reward myself by doing something cool, so I’m going to start tennis lessons tomorrow. We belong to a tennis club, but we don’t actually play tennis; we joined so we can use all their other facilities. My son wants to learn too, so he’s going to join me. (My husband isn’t interested because he has no depth perception.)
We do have a lot of drinkers at the club, and I had a real tendency to seek them out. This is how I ended up knocking back drinks after a workout when I last slipped. But there are plenty of non drinkers too. I’ll have to make a habit of seeking out the non drinkers.
Anyway, it’s going to be a beautiful, warm day here in Houston. I was all excited about the weather and started making plans, then I remembered that I have a stupid mammogram appointment this afternoon. Oh well, I’ll be happy to get it out of the way.
TJ — lol at the report card on the table. This reminds me of the acquaintance of mine who describes her daughter as “extraordinarily gifted.” The kid makes A’s, B’s, and C’s. Her mediocre performance is due to “boredom” with an unchallenging curriculum. 🙄Whatever, lady. 😏
Kaily — the meetup sounds great! Are you going to keep going? Also I understand the comparison you made; it makes sense to me. Maybe it’s because I’m an alcoholic too, idk.
Amanda — nicely done. You stayed strong, didn’t drink, and you didn’t throw Kevin off a bridge. Whenever those urges try to overtake you, you can always come post here first. I made a deal with myself to do that, and just the act of sharing my struggle helps my brain to settle down and make the right choice.
Strawberry — enjoy practice! Also, I think we all need a Kevin in our lives. I did a google image search, and he’s pretty cute.
RAL — yes, you should definitely wear flannel when doing anything with wood, even if it is with a machine. And way to go on the weight loss! That always feels good.
Mechanic — there you are! I’m very impressed with your 22 days, especially given all of your stress! Also, I see no harm in giving the beer to those guys; it was a courteous way to tell them to move along while ridding yourself of unwanted beer.
Anyway, I’ll check back in later. I hope everyone has a wonderful, sober day!
Yesterday was an excellent day for me. After bowling, which was so much fun, we all went out to dinner. My husband, son, younger daughter, and I were all making each other laugh so hard. It feels good to know that it’s possible to enjoy things while sober.
Ive decided to reward myself by doing something cool, so I’m going to start tennis lessons tomorrow. We belong to a tennis club, but we don’t actually play tennis; we joined so we can use all their other facilities. My son wants to learn too, so he’s going to join me. (My husband isn’t interested because he has no depth perception.)
We do have a lot of drinkers at the club, and I had a real tendency to seek them out. This is how I ended up knocking back drinks after a workout when I last slipped. But there are plenty of non drinkers too. I’ll have to make a habit of seeking out the non drinkers.
Anyway, it’s going to be a beautiful, warm day here in Houston. I was all excited about the weather and started making plans, then I remembered that I have a stupid mammogram appointment this afternoon. Oh well, I’ll be happy to get it out of the way.
TJ — lol at the report card on the table. This reminds me of the acquaintance of mine who describes her daughter as “extraordinarily gifted.” The kid makes A’s, B’s, and C’s. Her mediocre performance is due to “boredom” with an unchallenging curriculum. 🙄Whatever, lady. 😏
Kaily — the meetup sounds great! Are you going to keep going? Also I understand the comparison you made; it makes sense to me. Maybe it’s because I’m an alcoholic too, idk.
Amanda — nicely done. You stayed strong, didn’t drink, and you didn’t throw Kevin off a bridge. Whenever those urges try to overtake you, you can always come post here first. I made a deal with myself to do that, and just the act of sharing my struggle helps my brain to settle down and make the right choice.
Strawberry — enjoy practice! Also, I think we all need a Kevin in our lives. I did a google image search, and he’s pretty cute.
RAL — yes, you should definitely wear flannel when doing anything with wood, even if it is with a machine. And way to go on the weight loss! That always feels good.
Mechanic — there you are! I’m very impressed with your 22 days, especially given all of your stress! Also, I see no harm in giving the beer to those guys; it was a courteous way to tell them to move along while ridding yourself of unwanted beer.
Anyway, I’ll check back in later. I hope everyone has a wonderful, sober day!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 660
Good Morning Everyone :)
TeeJayVerm… My dad bowled too! I never asked him his score, but now I’m going to for the hell of it! LOL What is your cat’s name? I LOVE tiger cats. I had one I named “Chachi” and he was so awesome. Ironically I was NOT a Scott Baio (sp?) fan!
Kaily… I’m so happy to read about your walk! That’s awesome! Did you go anywhere new or interesting?
Amanda05… OMGoodness… what comedy (at the expense of your sanity)!!! I can sooo relate to this! Have the kids given Kevin a new adoptive name yet? LOL Did you ever watch Frasier? I was picturing Nile’s girlfriend/wife in your role. She was so funny. I miss the good old shows! You did an amazing job getting through that stressful event!
Strawberry18… I can’t believe it’s Day 14 already! Gosh, the days are FLYING for me. It’s because I don’t want them to, right? LOL The thing I don’t miss the most about football is washing those darn padded uniforms and trying to keep the stink out their helmets.
ReadyAtLast… Wow! 17 pounds? That’s amazing! I’m so happy for you :)
Themechanic… ((( Thank you! ))) I was feeling frustrated again and your reply has lifted my spirits so much! That is really great that things are working out better than you’d hoped! What a reward and encouragement for your hard work! I’m so glad :) I can relate to this a lot. The inability to think clearly and problem solve is one of the things that has really tipped the scales for me this time. While things are still incredibly stressful and chaotic, I am able to handle them a lot better. I think it’s wonderful that you have been so busy “getting things done” and living life that you had to go back and count! Wow! I was not sure where your “Dumpster Drinking” story was going to go. Did they literally not speak any of the languages you speak? How many languages DO you speak? I understand your second guessing, but for what it’s worth, I think it was a nice thing :) My oldest wants to become a mechanic. He is going to a two-year technical college and is completing the Honda PACT program next year. You sound like a very successful and intelligent businessman. If you have any advice for him, I would be so very grateful! :) Please feel free to private message me if it’s easier (and you have time).
Today we’re putting up our Christmas lights and I’m trying to decide if I want to hang garland because it’s suppose to rain all week. YUCK!!! Mother Nature sure is dumping on us this year!
I hope everyone has a great day! :)
TeeJayVerm… My dad bowled too! I never asked him his score, but now I’m going to for the hell of it! LOL What is your cat’s name? I LOVE tiger cats. I had one I named “Chachi” and he was so awesome. Ironically I was NOT a Scott Baio (sp?) fan!
Kaily… I’m so happy to read about your walk! That’s awesome! Did you go anywhere new or interesting?
Amanda05… OMGoodness… what comedy (at the expense of your sanity)!!! I can sooo relate to this! Have the kids given Kevin a new adoptive name yet? LOL Did you ever watch Frasier? I was picturing Nile’s girlfriend/wife in your role. She was so funny. I miss the good old shows! You did an amazing job getting through that stressful event!
Strawberry18… I can’t believe it’s Day 14 already! Gosh, the days are FLYING for me. It’s because I don’t want them to, right? LOL The thing I don’t miss the most about football is washing those darn padded uniforms and trying to keep the stink out their helmets.
ReadyAtLast… Wow! 17 pounds? That’s amazing! I’m so happy for you :)
Themechanic… ((( Thank you! ))) I was feeling frustrated again and your reply has lifted my spirits so much! That is really great that things are working out better than you’d hoped! What a reward and encouragement for your hard work! I’m so glad :) I can relate to this a lot. The inability to think clearly and problem solve is one of the things that has really tipped the scales for me this time. While things are still incredibly stressful and chaotic, I am able to handle them a lot better. I think it’s wonderful that you have been so busy “getting things done” and living life that you had to go back and count! Wow! I was not sure where your “Dumpster Drinking” story was going to go. Did they literally not speak any of the languages you speak? How many languages DO you speak? I understand your second guessing, but for what it’s worth, I think it was a nice thing :) My oldest wants to become a mechanic. He is going to a two-year technical college and is completing the Honda PACT program next year. You sound like a very successful and intelligent businessman. If you have any advice for him, I would be so very grateful! :) Please feel free to private message me if it’s easier (and you have time).
Today we’re putting up our Christmas lights and I’m trying to decide if I want to hang garland because it’s suppose to rain all week. YUCK!!! Mother Nature sure is dumping on us this year!
I hope everyone has a great day! :)
Member
Join Date: Sep 2016
Location: Kansas City, MO
Posts: 1,121
Day 20 - Oh my goodness. There are so many posts on here that I would love to respond to, but I have to be out the door in 20 minutes to go help my oldest daughter move. Amanda! Kevin Carrot! I'm going to be laughing at that story all morning. And you Bonnie, with your husband's lack of depth perception. That would definitely make tennis a bit more challenging wouldn't it?
Gotta run. Thanks everyone for the support last night. It was kind of a yuck day, but at least I didn't drink. So it was ultimately a success.
Gotta run. Thanks everyone for the support last night. It was kind of a yuck day, but at least I didn't drink. So it was ultimately a success.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 388
Everyone, I am sorry I have not been posting here as much a I would like. I do read most posts and this forum continues to be extremely helpful.
I am on day 36 today. I decided to get additional help as well. I have decided to go see a therapist. I filled out a request at my employer to see a nearby therapist Tuesday and got an approval number Wednesday. I called the therapist and left her a message that I wanted to make an appointment. I think she was off for the long weekend but I hope to here from her Monday.
Also, as I have posted here many times that Fridays are by far my biggest trigger. However, last night was a breeze. I know that was mostly because work was closed for the Holiday and it did not feel like a usual Friday. But I think it may also be partially due to this whole not drinking thing getting easier.
I also wanted to say my wife is much more supportive now. I posted early on that she was not very supportive. We never even spoke about me not drinking, and on day 10 she even brought home a pint of whiskey for me, she does not drink whiskey. We did finally talk about me not drinking, and she is on board. In fact, she has even drastically reduced her own drinking. I dont think she has had any alcohol in 10 days which is very unusual.
last week I poured out all of my alcohol in the house. I'm not sure why it took so long but it was not really that much of a trigger having it there. I poured out the pint of whiskey my wife bought, another pints worth of whiskey I had left in a 1.75 liter, and 20 beers. I left my wife's wine and spiked seltzer, I dont drink that anyway. Pouring it out really made me feel like this whole quitting thing is real. Its weird and nice not having any beer or whiskey in the house and not running to the store as quickly as possible to restock.
Anyway, thanks as usual for listening. I really am happy for everyone here that is doing so well!
I am on day 36 today. I decided to get additional help as well. I have decided to go see a therapist. I filled out a request at my employer to see a nearby therapist Tuesday and got an approval number Wednesday. I called the therapist and left her a message that I wanted to make an appointment. I think she was off for the long weekend but I hope to here from her Monday.
Also, as I have posted here many times that Fridays are by far my biggest trigger. However, last night was a breeze. I know that was mostly because work was closed for the Holiday and it did not feel like a usual Friday. But I think it may also be partially due to this whole not drinking thing getting easier.
I also wanted to say my wife is much more supportive now. I posted early on that she was not very supportive. We never even spoke about me not drinking, and on day 10 she even brought home a pint of whiskey for me, she does not drink whiskey. We did finally talk about me not drinking, and she is on board. In fact, she has even drastically reduced her own drinking. I dont think she has had any alcohol in 10 days which is very unusual.
last week I poured out all of my alcohol in the house. I'm not sure why it took so long but it was not really that much of a trigger having it there. I poured out the pint of whiskey my wife bought, another pints worth of whiskey I had left in a 1.75 liter, and 20 beers. I left my wife's wine and spiked seltzer, I dont drink that anyway. Pouring it out really made me feel like this whole quitting thing is real. Its weird and nice not having any beer or whiskey in the house and not running to the store as quickly as possible to restock.
Anyway, thanks as usual for listening. I really am happy for everyone here that is doing so well!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2017
Location: UK
Posts: 3,522
Hope everybody is keeping well.
I'm back at day one. I'd managed almost two weeks and everything seemed to be going fine then on Wednesday I got a dreadful urge to drink. Very strong urges in fact but I managed to let them pass and by 8pm I was relaxed once again. But I knew this was just the start and that the following day would bring more urges. Sure enough that happened. I ended up drinking on Thursday and continued drinking from mid morning yesterday (Friday) to last night. I finished the alcohol I had not long before midnight.
Thankfully I haven't felt too bad today. I had a bit of a hangover this morning but that was gone by noon. This afternoon I did some reading here at SR then went for a walk. I would like to call the last two days a blip on my road to recovery but I've had too many blips for me to just dismiss them. I really wish I could deal with those urges / cravings I get to drink. I once had a three month sobriety wrecked by them when they went on for almost two weeks and in the end I cracked. The urges got so bad back then that towards the end I couldn't sleep because of the cravings.
I'm sure we've all had cravings. My cousin once asked me what the urges felt like and I answered by saying that it was like being very hungry and trying hard not to think of food. When I have an urge to drink it really is difficult to not think about drinking. Which of course just makes it worse.
I should have posted here a few days ago when the cravings were starting to come back. But I thought that making a post about how I was feeling in a thread where so many people are racking up sobriety days would be somewhat negative. Unfortunately when I feel vulnerable like that I withdraw into myself which I know is the wrong thing to do. I've known that for years but I never learn.
Anyway, day one it is. I get fed up of always being back at day one.
I'm back at day one. I'd managed almost two weeks and everything seemed to be going fine then on Wednesday I got a dreadful urge to drink. Very strong urges in fact but I managed to let them pass and by 8pm I was relaxed once again. But I knew this was just the start and that the following day would bring more urges. Sure enough that happened. I ended up drinking on Thursday and continued drinking from mid morning yesterday (Friday) to last night. I finished the alcohol I had not long before midnight.
Thankfully I haven't felt too bad today. I had a bit of a hangover this morning but that was gone by noon. This afternoon I did some reading here at SR then went for a walk. I would like to call the last two days a blip on my road to recovery but I've had too many blips for me to just dismiss them. I really wish I could deal with those urges / cravings I get to drink. I once had a three month sobriety wrecked by them when they went on for almost two weeks and in the end I cracked. The urges got so bad back then that towards the end I couldn't sleep because of the cravings.
I'm sure we've all had cravings. My cousin once asked me what the urges felt like and I answered by saying that it was like being very hungry and trying hard not to think of food. When I have an urge to drink it really is difficult to not think about drinking. Which of course just makes it worse.
I should have posted here a few days ago when the cravings were starting to come back. But I thought that making a post about how I was feeling in a thread where so many people are racking up sobriety days would be somewhat negative. Unfortunately when I feel vulnerable like that I withdraw into myself which I know is the wrong thing to do. I've known that for years but I never learn.
Anyway, day one it is. I get fed up of always being back at day one.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 771
I’m sorry you’re back to day one, Robbie, but you’re posting here which means a lot. Welcome back. 🤗
I think there is no better time to post than when you are struggling. We are here for each other. If we only posted happy thoughts, maybe we wouldn’t need this forum so much. A couple of times I’ve felt pretty close to giving in, but just putting it out there for the rest of this group helped me get a handle on things.
I hope you will do the same if you should feel the strong cravings again. It’s not negative to admit this isn’t easy and sometimes sucks. This is hard, it’s a huge change for many of us, and that’s okay.
We are stronger together, and we’re here for each other. I hope you aren’t feeling too down on yourself. You deserve to be sober; you are worth it. ❤️
I think there is no better time to post than when you are struggling. We are here for each other. If we only posted happy thoughts, maybe we wouldn’t need this forum so much. A couple of times I’ve felt pretty close to giving in, but just putting it out there for the rest of this group helped me get a handle on things.
I hope you will do the same if you should feel the strong cravings again. It’s not negative to admit this isn’t easy and sometimes sucks. This is hard, it’s a huge change for many of us, and that’s okay.
We are stronger together, and we’re here for each other. I hope you aren’t feeling too down on yourself. You deserve to be sober; you are worth it. ❤️
Member
Join Date: Nov 2018
Posts: 771
Breakfree — I’m a slacker when it comes to Christmas lights; I haven’t even thought that far ahead. I guess I should get that going soon.
RD2Q — 36 days! That’s fantastic! And it’s really nice that your wife is being supportive. Also, nice job pouring out the alcohol. When I decided I wanted to quit, I got rid of the wine by drinking all of it. Ugh. 🤢 Felt dreadful the next day. Your way is better.
Clearpath — congrats on day 20!
Casey — count me in for a sober saturday!
☕️
RD2Q — 36 days! That’s fantastic! And it’s really nice that your wife is being supportive. Also, nice job pouring out the alcohol. When I decided I wanted to quit, I got rid of the wine by drinking all of it. Ugh. 🤢 Felt dreadful the next day. Your way is better.
Clearpath — congrats on day 20!
Casey — count me in for a sober saturday!
☕️
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,481
But I thought that making a post about how I was feeling in a thread where so many people are racking up sobriety days would be somewhat negative.
This is a support thread
We understand the struggle.
I think we can both congratulate those hitting personal milestones and help those struggling - as far as multi skilling goes, that's not too onerous
We're here for support - if anyone's in trouble, I really hope they'll put their fear, shame or embarrassment aside and ask for help
Welcome back Robbie
D
Member
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Georgia
Posts: 240
Hi all. I'm getting such awesome info and ideas from reading all your post. They truly inspire me. For anyone struggling I understand that too. Been there and still experience the struggle.
I'm finishing up with day 4. I've had 2 situations where booze has been in the house (spouse brought in). In both instances I immediately got on sr and began reading. I've kept myself busy doing things I haven't done in more than 6 months. I am not 100% comfortable but I am firm in my resolve not to drink.
thank God for this site that teaches and encourages. My prayers are with you all. Have a wonderful night and great Sunday.
I'm finishing up with day 4. I've had 2 situations where booze has been in the house (spouse brought in). In both instances I immediately got on sr and began reading. I've kept myself busy doing things I haven't done in more than 6 months. I am not 100% comfortable but I am firm in my resolve not to drink.
thank God for this site that teaches and encourages. My prayers are with you all. Have a wonderful night and great Sunday.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 129
Good evening,
Day 4 done. Busy day at work, home relaxing with my husband, watching the Bruins having pizza and salad. Nice wood stove fire making me sleepy.
Love reading everyone's posts. Robbie, yours was a powerful post for me. Cravings are hard and I need to plan what I will do when they hit for me. My first step will be to come and post here.
Congrats to everyone else experiencing success and praying for those who are struggling. Keep posting and sharing, we are here to support each other.
On to day 5 tomorrow!
-Otter
Day 4 done. Busy day at work, home relaxing with my husband, watching the Bruins having pizza and salad. Nice wood stove fire making me sleepy.
Love reading everyone's posts. Robbie, yours was a powerful post for me. Cravings are hard and I need to plan what I will do when they hit for me. My first step will be to come and post here.
Congrats to everyone else experiencing success and praying for those who are struggling. Keep posting and sharing, we are here to support each other.
On to day 5 tomorrow!
-Otter
Member
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: United States
Posts: 421
Originally Posted by Kaily
Hi still here and reading all the posts with interest. You are all doing so well.
Day 24.
Yesterday I actually went on a walk with a "meetup" group. Only five people turned up but that was fine with me.
As most of you know I spend 90% of my time alone at home so it was lovely to be out with people and having conversations.
I was on my way home and realised that I had barely thought of drinking all day. Although that thought in itself did then trigger drinking thoughts.
Also a vegan lady was telling me about when she had been tricked by an ex boyfriend into eating dairy, my instant reply was that would be like putting alcohol in someones drink that had given up drinking, I don't think she could see the comparison at all, it was just my alcoholic brain.
I am tired today, even though I walked miles yesterday I didn't sleep well. I was getting cravings in the middle of the night with thoughts of getting up, dressed and out to the local 24 hour supermarket to buy some poison!
Stay Sober everyone X
Day 24.
Yesterday I actually went on a walk with a "meetup" group. Only five people turned up but that was fine with me.
As most of you know I spend 90% of my time alone at home so it was lovely to be out with people and having conversations.
I was on my way home and realised that I had barely thought of drinking all day. Although that thought in itself did then trigger drinking thoughts.
Also a vegan lady was telling me about when she had been tricked by an ex boyfriend into eating dairy, my instant reply was that would be like putting alcohol in someones drink that had given up drinking, I don't think she could see the comparison at all, it was just my alcoholic brain.
I am tired today, even though I walked miles yesterday I didn't sleep well. I was getting cravings in the middle of the night with thoughts of getting up, dressed and out to the local 24 hour supermarket to buy some poison!
Stay Sober everyone X
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