Class Of March 2018 Support Thread - Part 4
Member
Join Date: Feb 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 312
Hi everyone,
A quick check-in here. I hope that you're all doing well. The heat has come back - this is one of the longest, hottest and driest spells I can remember. Our lawn is turning yellow and my garden is none too happy! Hopefully it will rain a bit soon.
In 4 days we're leaving for camping - we'll be gone for almost 2 weeks, and I'm not sure how many opportunities I'll have to check in. So if I go quiet for awhile, that's why. I'm really looking forward to it. It'll be the first alcohol-free camping trip I've had in...years! Not that we ever really over-indulged while camping, but it was nice to have a cold beer by the fire in the evenings. I'll need to find a nice non-alcoholic drink to bring as a campfire beverage.
Hope you all have a good rest of the week!
JT
A quick check-in here. I hope that you're all doing well. The heat has come back - this is one of the longest, hottest and driest spells I can remember. Our lawn is turning yellow and my garden is none too happy! Hopefully it will rain a bit soon.
In 4 days we're leaving for camping - we'll be gone for almost 2 weeks, and I'm not sure how many opportunities I'll have to check in. So if I go quiet for awhile, that's why. I'm really looking forward to it. It'll be the first alcohol-free camping trip I've had in...years! Not that we ever really over-indulged while camping, but it was nice to have a cold beer by the fire in the evenings. I'll need to find a nice non-alcoholic drink to bring as a campfire beverage.
Hope you all have a good rest of the week!
JT
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: East Coast US
Posts: 1,837
Have fun JT! Thanks for letting us know you will be gone. Camping has never been my thing (traumatized by my first overnight Girl Scouts camping trip in the early 70's), but many tell me I should try "glamping". LOL!
Today is Day 21 for me and I am struggling a bit. The "salesman" is knocking on my door, still trying to sell me "just one." I am not answering the door, but he's still a knocking. The sugar free ice cream sandwhich in my freezer may have to stay there while I go crazy on a pint of Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey. To heck with the blood sugar tonight! LOL!!
Today is Day 21 for me and I am struggling a bit. The "salesman" is knocking on my door, still trying to sell me "just one." I am not answering the door, but he's still a knocking. The sugar free ice cream sandwhich in my freezer may have to stay there while I go crazy on a pint of Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey. To heck with the blood sugar tonight! LOL!!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,747
I’m baaaaaaaack
I had a good time in the mountains. I’m just winding down with DJTM and the kitty here at home. I’ll try to check in more thoroughly sometime in the afternoon tomorrow. Lots to tell. I hope everyone is well
I had a good time in the mountains. I’m just winding down with DJTM and the kitty here at home. I’ll try to check in more thoroughly sometime in the afternoon tomorrow. Lots to tell. I hope everyone is well
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,473
Good to hear from you Plenny.
LHW - you've had that salesman come round before and you know it's never just one sample
whats going on that you think a drink could make it better?
D
LHW - you've had that salesman come round before and you know it's never just one sample
whats going on that you think a drink could make it better?
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: East Coast US
Posts: 1,837
Good Morning, Dee! Thanks for your comments.
Welcome home Plenny! Can't wait to hear about your trip!
Dee - that salesman always shows up around the same time - either around the 21 days mark or the 8-9-10th of a month. I have actually mentally tracked the "slips" for quite awhile now, hence the need to be extra vigilant during these times.
I have decided that the 8-9-10 thing has to be hormonal because that's when he's knocking on the door without fail. There is no scientific evidence or even theory to this, but it IS definitely a pattern. The 21-day thing is also a pattern. My best guess on that one is that by this time, the alcohol is completely out of my system and so any feelings or emotions are real and raw and not numbed by alcohol. The things I perceive to be real issues are smacking me right in the face hard. I know alcohol will not change a thing, yet the salesman thinks it will.
You might remember I went to that holistic practitioner awhile back because I felt "out of sorts" or "out of balance". She said the words should be "disconnected", due to the lack of having any real daily contact with anyone other than work folks. The whole loneliness and friends thing again. I continue to try very hard to make "connnections" though, but sometimes it feels just hopeless. I get disgusted sometimes but I keep trying. This weekend I am going away on my business trip a few days early to visit with some friends who live in the same area where my meetings will be, and they always bring my mood up.
I will add that today is the anniversary of my husband's death and while it has been many years now, it always make me a bit sad. Not so sad as in the early years, but sad just the same.
The salesman finally went away last night as I ate an entire bag of Skinny Pop Cheddar Cheese popcorn in one sitting. And not the single serve bag either. HA HA.
Anyway, back to work. Hope everyone has a great day.
Welcome home Plenny! Can't wait to hear about your trip!
Dee - that salesman always shows up around the same time - either around the 21 days mark or the 8-9-10th of a month. I have actually mentally tracked the "slips" for quite awhile now, hence the need to be extra vigilant during these times.
I have decided that the 8-9-10 thing has to be hormonal because that's when he's knocking on the door without fail. There is no scientific evidence or even theory to this, but it IS definitely a pattern. The 21-day thing is also a pattern. My best guess on that one is that by this time, the alcohol is completely out of my system and so any feelings or emotions are real and raw and not numbed by alcohol. The things I perceive to be real issues are smacking me right in the face hard. I know alcohol will not change a thing, yet the salesman thinks it will.
You might remember I went to that holistic practitioner awhile back because I felt "out of sorts" or "out of balance". She said the words should be "disconnected", due to the lack of having any real daily contact with anyone other than work folks. The whole loneliness and friends thing again. I continue to try very hard to make "connnections" though, but sometimes it feels just hopeless. I get disgusted sometimes but I keep trying. This weekend I am going away on my business trip a few days early to visit with some friends who live in the same area where my meetings will be, and they always bring my mood up.
I will add that today is the anniversary of my husband's death and while it has been many years now, it always make me a bit sad. Not so sad as in the early years, but sad just the same.
The salesman finally went away last night as I ate an entire bag of Skinny Pop Cheddar Cheese popcorn in one sitting. And not the single serve bag either. HA HA.
Anyway, back to work. Hope everyone has a great day.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: GA
Posts: 700
Yay!!! Welcome back to SR, Plenny!!! Hope you and DJTM are still on a nature buzz. Mine usually lasts for a week after camping
JT, camping for 2 weeks? Sounds divine. I hope it's a good time. What kind of campsite are you staying at? The heat sounds awful though. We had a dry heat the other day and I was thinking how well I've acclimated to the south because I was really enjoying it! Then the humidity moved in... still not as bad as the northeast though.
LHW, I'm thinking of you tonight. I hope you have a good evening. I cannot even imagine what that is like. Especially in the early years. It will probably happen to me one day but it is difficult for me to think about. I want to grow old with my love and to know that might not happen is terrifying. To be sober and 100% independent. You are a strong woman. You can make it over this hump!
Lots of things going on here. I feel like I don't have much downtime except at night when I can't sleep. I tried going to bed without the TV on and made it 2 nights. I don't think it's healthy but without it, all I can hear are my racing thoughts. They're not bad always but just things I need to remember to do or write down, thoughts about my recovery or anything at all. Also the TV helps keep my super neurotic pup from barking at a leaf falling outside.
Escape room this weekend and a concert on Monday with my old best friend. I don't know how her alcohol issue is going. I think she may hide the truth from me. We would talk openly when we were both struggling but now she just says vague things like
"I haven't been drinking as much still" or just a tall boy after work and a scotch now and then".
She went to a meeting with me once when I first started. She said she liked it but her bf made fun of it and she hasn't come back. I have no expectations but I do hope I can show her that I'm having fun without being drunk. Because two summers ago we wouldn't have dreamed that was even a possibility. I think I'm starting to prove that old self wrong.
JT, camping for 2 weeks? Sounds divine. I hope it's a good time. What kind of campsite are you staying at? The heat sounds awful though. We had a dry heat the other day and I was thinking how well I've acclimated to the south because I was really enjoying it! Then the humidity moved in... still not as bad as the northeast though.
LHW, I'm thinking of you tonight. I hope you have a good evening. I cannot even imagine what that is like. Especially in the early years. It will probably happen to me one day but it is difficult for me to think about. I want to grow old with my love and to know that might not happen is terrifying. To be sober and 100% independent. You are a strong woman. You can make it over this hump!
Lots of things going on here. I feel like I don't have much downtime except at night when I can't sleep. I tried going to bed without the TV on and made it 2 nights. I don't think it's healthy but without it, all I can hear are my racing thoughts. They're not bad always but just things I need to remember to do or write down, thoughts about my recovery or anything at all. Also the TV helps keep my super neurotic pup from barking at a leaf falling outside.
Escape room this weekend and a concert on Monday with my old best friend. I don't know how her alcohol issue is going. I think she may hide the truth from me. We would talk openly when we were both struggling but now she just says vague things like
"I haven't been drinking as much still" or just a tall boy after work and a scotch now and then".
She went to a meeting with me once when I first started. She said she liked it but her bf made fun of it and she hasn't come back. I have no expectations but I do hope I can show her that I'm having fun without being drunk. Because two summers ago we wouldn't have dreamed that was even a possibility. I think I'm starting to prove that old self wrong.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,747
Hi everyone!
Thinking of you tonight LHW, I do know how those anniversaries can be. Sometimes they can be really rough, sometimes they can provide positive reflection. In any case, godspeed through this one
JT, I hope you have a great trip! I feel like I've learned that nature is best experienced clear-headed, so you have that advantage! Enjoy it!
GBE, I think that when I am (was?) struggling to stay sober or drinking and not really liking it I was always really happy to see someone living by example. I loved seeing a living breathing example that sobriety can work and be fun and that people can be happy and not bored, etc. I hope your friend will see that too. I'm kind of interested in this escape room thing but I think I might get anxiety doing it? But isn't that part of the fun?
Well I made it through another vacation sober. Thankfully the great outdoors is so exhilarating I was constantly reminded how glad I was I wasn't drunk or hung over. I'm also really grateful for the sober vacations of my past, which I white knuckled through, which gave me tools I used this time, confidently for the first time. There were a few tough times, like visiting local breweries (thankfully most of them make delicious root or birch beers or fresh ginger ales) and long afternoons between meals or activities (I have learned to take naps, even if I'm faking it I can get some time alone and away from triggers). Most of the time my group was really supportive and didn't bat an eyelash at my abstinence. Actually they were never NOT supportive they just would sometimes forget and offer me a glass or get too drunk around me or what have you. It's ok though. They often displayed their less savory character traits and then hangovers so it really helped me feel good about my state of mind. I think I may have explained to everyone before that DJTM's family is pretty familiar with recovery. His mom is a recovering alcoholic, and his sister is a recovering heroin addict. They are all pretty open about it, and they all seem very aware of DJTM's trials and tribulations with the drink, and so I was very open with them as well.
The mountains were beautiful, and we went tubing, hiking, swimming in rivers, and they went caving (I did not go in there!). We ate very well, every day we cooked. Well, sister cooked mostly, she is an amazing cook. It always takes me a lot to relax, and I feel awkward so much of the time, I really had some days where I felt very exhausted and cloudy headed I think because of altitude, being surrounded by people all the time, eating too much bread, etc? I just get overwhelmed. Spent some quality time with DJTM's mother and niece as well. All in all it was a really fun trip.
Funny enough, my favorite part of the trip was on the way out. We stopped halfway at an old friend of mine's place, where he lives with his girlfriend and her adopted son. This friend was another old drinking buddy of mine. Like, I think the last time I saw him the two of us were really going through a lot of intense stuff. We were very drunk all the time. I was leaving my ex husband, and he was just out of a relationship. Both of us had hit financial walls and some sort of rock bottom, leaving our professions, realizing we had to leave the city we lived in, etc. Just at parallel rock bottoms I guess, and being very toxic together.
Well, since he left the city, he quit drinking, met a woman who epitomizes everything he looks for in a partner, who also doesn't drink, and moved into her house in a beautiful neighborhood. Seeing him there was really good, it's like this magical little bubble with so many flowers and trees and spiders, and plenty of work for him to do. It just makes me so happy that he is in this corner of the world, sober, safe, and happy. I just loved sitting on their porch, talking about everything, no small talk, spiders spinning their webs, twinkling lights, fireflies, neighborhood kids riding their bikes down the hill till it got too dark, dinner, ice cream, glass bottles of water all around us, and no substances needed to enhance the experience. DJTM did have a couple beers. But we also sat around talking about eliminating alcohol from our lives. It made me feel strong and I feel so lucky to have them as support. My friend's girlfriend even said I could text her any time if I needed to, even though she did warn me she would be real with me. I'm opening up more and more and being held more accountable so I think I will be ok with that.
Then I went back to work tonight, and I asked one of the sous chefs if I could come over to her house to visit her and her wife next week, because I really love them and I also need to spend more time with the sober people in my life. She said absolutely, and that we will coordinate something fun at their new house.
It feels good to be back! A bit surreal because suddenly I feel like I haven't been gone at all but I know it has been like 2 weeks which I feel is forever in SR time!
Thinking of you tonight LHW, I do know how those anniversaries can be. Sometimes they can be really rough, sometimes they can provide positive reflection. In any case, godspeed through this one
JT, I hope you have a great trip! I feel like I've learned that nature is best experienced clear-headed, so you have that advantage! Enjoy it!
GBE, I think that when I am (was?) struggling to stay sober or drinking and not really liking it I was always really happy to see someone living by example. I loved seeing a living breathing example that sobriety can work and be fun and that people can be happy and not bored, etc. I hope your friend will see that too. I'm kind of interested in this escape room thing but I think I might get anxiety doing it? But isn't that part of the fun?
Well I made it through another vacation sober. Thankfully the great outdoors is so exhilarating I was constantly reminded how glad I was I wasn't drunk or hung over. I'm also really grateful for the sober vacations of my past, which I white knuckled through, which gave me tools I used this time, confidently for the first time. There were a few tough times, like visiting local breweries (thankfully most of them make delicious root or birch beers or fresh ginger ales) and long afternoons between meals or activities (I have learned to take naps, even if I'm faking it I can get some time alone and away from triggers). Most of the time my group was really supportive and didn't bat an eyelash at my abstinence. Actually they were never NOT supportive they just would sometimes forget and offer me a glass or get too drunk around me or what have you. It's ok though. They often displayed their less savory character traits and then hangovers so it really helped me feel good about my state of mind. I think I may have explained to everyone before that DJTM's family is pretty familiar with recovery. His mom is a recovering alcoholic, and his sister is a recovering heroin addict. They are all pretty open about it, and they all seem very aware of DJTM's trials and tribulations with the drink, and so I was very open with them as well.
The mountains were beautiful, and we went tubing, hiking, swimming in rivers, and they went caving (I did not go in there!). We ate very well, every day we cooked. Well, sister cooked mostly, she is an amazing cook. It always takes me a lot to relax, and I feel awkward so much of the time, I really had some days where I felt very exhausted and cloudy headed I think because of altitude, being surrounded by people all the time, eating too much bread, etc? I just get overwhelmed. Spent some quality time with DJTM's mother and niece as well. All in all it was a really fun trip.
Funny enough, my favorite part of the trip was on the way out. We stopped halfway at an old friend of mine's place, where he lives with his girlfriend and her adopted son. This friend was another old drinking buddy of mine. Like, I think the last time I saw him the two of us were really going through a lot of intense stuff. We were very drunk all the time. I was leaving my ex husband, and he was just out of a relationship. Both of us had hit financial walls and some sort of rock bottom, leaving our professions, realizing we had to leave the city we lived in, etc. Just at parallel rock bottoms I guess, and being very toxic together.
Well, since he left the city, he quit drinking, met a woman who epitomizes everything he looks for in a partner, who also doesn't drink, and moved into her house in a beautiful neighborhood. Seeing him there was really good, it's like this magical little bubble with so many flowers and trees and spiders, and plenty of work for him to do. It just makes me so happy that he is in this corner of the world, sober, safe, and happy. I just loved sitting on their porch, talking about everything, no small talk, spiders spinning their webs, twinkling lights, fireflies, neighborhood kids riding their bikes down the hill till it got too dark, dinner, ice cream, glass bottles of water all around us, and no substances needed to enhance the experience. DJTM did have a couple beers. But we also sat around talking about eliminating alcohol from our lives. It made me feel strong and I feel so lucky to have them as support. My friend's girlfriend even said I could text her any time if I needed to, even though she did warn me she would be real with me. I'm opening up more and more and being held more accountable so I think I will be ok with that.
Then I went back to work tonight, and I asked one of the sous chefs if I could come over to her house to visit her and her wife next week, because I really love them and I also need to spend more time with the sober people in my life. She said absolutely, and that we will coordinate something fun at their new house.
It feels good to be back! A bit surreal because suddenly I feel like I haven't been gone at all but I know it has been like 2 weeks which I feel is forever in SR time!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: East Coast US
Posts: 1,837
GBE - my former therapist suggested a download of some particular music geared for helping one get to sleep that I play each night whenI get into bed. The music is an hour long and I don't think I have ever hear the entire thing all the way through. I will get my phone out later and let you know the name of it. The music is somehow supposed to tap into the appropriate brain waves to help induce sleep. I don't know how all that works, but it sure does work for me.
Plenny - sounds like you had a great vacation and so nice to hear that you were able to catch up with your old friend. I was picturing a home on Wisteria Lane when you were describing it (from Desperate Housewives or one of those shows). Glad you found support with DJTM's family on the not drinking.
I'm working today and then getting my stuff ready to head out tomorrow for a work trip. I think I mentioned I am going a few days early to visit some friends who used to live in this area. I haven't seen them in over a year and they have always remained in close contact with me since my husband died. One of the few.
Anyway, I have been up since 5:30am (another one of those "how nice" things when not drinking and am going to go for my walk before my first conference call. I am finding that getting in that habit is helping me start the day with a clear mind.
I am entering the home stretch toward my first 30 days of no alcohol in awhile. I still need to be extra vigilant this weekend, even though they only have one beer at 5pm and that is that. I am envious of that, but oh well. That's not me for sure.
I'll touch base over the weekend and next week while travelling. Happy Friday everyone, make it a good day!
Plenny - sounds like you had a great vacation and so nice to hear that you were able to catch up with your old friend. I was picturing a home on Wisteria Lane when you were describing it (from Desperate Housewives or one of those shows). Glad you found support with DJTM's family on the not drinking.
I'm working today and then getting my stuff ready to head out tomorrow for a work trip. I think I mentioned I am going a few days early to visit some friends who used to live in this area. I haven't seen them in over a year and they have always remained in close contact with me since my husband died. One of the few.
Anyway, I have been up since 5:30am (another one of those "how nice" things when not drinking and am going to go for my walk before my first conference call. I am finding that getting in that habit is helping me start the day with a clear mind.
I am entering the home stretch toward my first 30 days of no alcohol in awhile. I still need to be extra vigilant this weekend, even though they only have one beer at 5pm and that is that. I am envious of that, but oh well. That's not me for sure.
I'll touch base over the weekend and next week while travelling. Happy Friday everyone, make it a good day!
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: GA
Posts: 700
Plenny, that sounds like an amazing time. Also eating well the entire time is a huge plus. My family tends to eat out alot when we all visit.
That last night sounds wonderful. It's great you were able to make that new sober connection with an old drinking buddy. How awesome to have two lovely friends to be able to talk about it with. Are they in AA? I like that I have SR and podcasts to listen to, to sometimes hear about how other people did it.
I'm glad you reached out to the sous chef. It's hard to find sober and wholesome folks in the restaurant industry, at least in my experience.
Oh yeah, our escape rooms aren't scary at all and you can walk out the room at any time. It's not high pressure and it's just a fun thing to do, solving puzzles and finding clues and combinations to number, word and directional locks. I think you'd like it. I bet there are tons in your area.
LHW, I hope you enjoy your upcoming trip with your close friends. You can make it to 30 days! Just remember that you cannot drink, under any circumstance. It is a posion to you and will not quench any physical or mental need you have, any of which will surely be temporary and hopefully fleeting.
That last night sounds wonderful. It's great you were able to make that new sober connection with an old drinking buddy. How awesome to have two lovely friends to be able to talk about it with. Are they in AA? I like that I have SR and podcasts to listen to, to sometimes hear about how other people did it.
I'm glad you reached out to the sous chef. It's hard to find sober and wholesome folks in the restaurant industry, at least in my experience.
Oh yeah, our escape rooms aren't scary at all and you can walk out the room at any time. It's not high pressure and it's just a fun thing to do, solving puzzles and finding clues and combinations to number, word and directional locks. I think you'd like it. I bet there are tons in your area.
LHW, I hope you enjoy your upcoming trip with your close friends. You can make it to 30 days! Just remember that you cannot drink, under any circumstance. It is a posion to you and will not quench any physical or mental need you have, any of which will surely be temporary and hopefully fleeting.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: East Coast US
Posts: 1,837
Thanks Plenny and GBE. I will definite remember your words, GBE!
The sleep song my holistic practitioner recommeded is called "Hiberation (Deep Slelep Binaural Beats)" by J.S. Epperson.
I googled it and was able to find it along with other "songs" by this same person that have to do with stress relief, etc. I did download another one called "Illumination for Creative Focus" that I play during the day while working as background music. I have to say the "Hibernation" works wonders.
Well, I am going to go finish getting things ready for my trip. My airport shuttle guy will be here in a few hours and for some crazy reason, instead of packing last night I decided to clean the kitchen. LOL!
Everyone have a great rest of the day and I will be sure to check in while travelling.
LHW
The sleep song my holistic practitioner recommeded is called "Hiberation (Deep Slelep Binaural Beats)" by J.S. Epperson.
I googled it and was able to find it along with other "songs" by this same person that have to do with stress relief, etc. I did download another one called "Illumination for Creative Focus" that I play during the day while working as background music. I have to say the "Hibernation" works wonders.
Well, I am going to go finish getting things ready for my trip. My airport shuttle guy will be here in a few hours and for some crazy reason, instead of packing last night I decided to clean the kitchen. LOL!
Everyone have a great rest of the day and I will be sure to check in while travelling.
LHW
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: GA
Posts: 700
Thanks for the songs LHW. I tried to listen to binaural beats several years ago for meditation but got distracted by drinking or whatever. Excited to give them a try again, thank you! May your flights today be on time and mishap free!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,747
Good morning everyone! I don’t think I mentioned it but I was in a bit of a slump the last few days just feeling bloated and very tired and emotional etc. Non menstrual related so I had nothing to really blame it on. Anyway I did wake up feeling much better today and I even left early for work so I could set aside some time for myself for breakfast. I have this beautiful perfect tomato from my friends garden in Knoxville so I went to the bagel shop to get a vehicle to enjoy it on!
My Knoxville friends also gave me a beautiful little pot of succulents, which I have never owned before, so now I have two different kinds of plants in my house. This morning DJTM said I was turning into a real plant lady and I told him I always wanted to be a plant person but I was always too drunk to stay on top of it and remember to care for them.
Another realization hit me yesterday, I was telling my coworker that by the end of this year, if I work really hard, I should be out of divorce debt, and I’m thinking about buying a motorcycle. She will be a motorcycle safety instructor by that time and she might even sell me her bike when she gets a new one. I told her I always wanted to have a motorcycle but I always said in my head over the years, “I can’t have a motorcycle I drink too much.” Because I couldn’t imagine just not drinking. And thankfully I was too scared to ride drunk.
I even remember when I lived in New York and I had one hour in between classes in the wintertime, and I was trying to think of what to do in that hour, and knowing I would go to a bar, I said to my ex husband, “What am I going to do for my last class? I can do a lot of damage in one hour!” Now I would just sit in a coffee shop and sketch or something. Or take a yoga class or something! Sheeeeeeeeesh.
In a way I don’t feel like regretting all my wasted time drinking and all the drama it caused in my life. For twenty years! Instead I feel like appreciating that I have so many new cool things to learn and discover as an adult, and I’ll be avoiding a lot of monotony this way. It’s awesome to have a new chapter.
My Knoxville friends also gave me a beautiful little pot of succulents, which I have never owned before, so now I have two different kinds of plants in my house. This morning DJTM said I was turning into a real plant lady and I told him I always wanted to be a plant person but I was always too drunk to stay on top of it and remember to care for them.
Another realization hit me yesterday, I was telling my coworker that by the end of this year, if I work really hard, I should be out of divorce debt, and I’m thinking about buying a motorcycle. She will be a motorcycle safety instructor by that time and she might even sell me her bike when she gets a new one. I told her I always wanted to have a motorcycle but I always said in my head over the years, “I can’t have a motorcycle I drink too much.” Because I couldn’t imagine just not drinking. And thankfully I was too scared to ride drunk.
I even remember when I lived in New York and I had one hour in between classes in the wintertime, and I was trying to think of what to do in that hour, and knowing I would go to a bar, I said to my ex husband, “What am I going to do for my last class? I can do a lot of damage in one hour!” Now I would just sit in a coffee shop and sketch or something. Or take a yoga class or something! Sheeeeeeeeesh.
In a way I don’t feel like regretting all my wasted time drinking and all the drama it caused in my life. For twenty years! Instead I feel like appreciating that I have so many new cool things to learn and discover as an adult, and I’ll be avoiding a lot of monotony this way. It’s awesome to have a new chapter.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: GA
Posts: 700
Plenny, I'm a wanna be plant lady! My gram is a master gardner and had her own business floral design business. I sadly kill most things I grow. I think I may have even killed my succulent and African violet, sober! They weren't getting enough sun so i put them outside and no they have too much water. I try though. I'd love to have a house full of thriving green plants.
Also, I got my motorcycle license last February. My bf has always ridden sport bikes and he never thought I'd learn, after a few topples in the yard and driveway ending in scrapes and usually a few unkind words from me to him. But I surprised him and took the 2 day class on Superbowl weekend and it rained the whole time. He bought me a bike that summer and sadly a friend of his wrecked it, totally sober and on accident and not his fault. Do you know how to ride? I hate to say I always needed a little liquid courage to steady the shaky hands. Lord... glad to be here now!
I don't feel like I look that much different either. I DO feel so much more at peace and healthy internally so that makes for the physical differences I can't see.
Also, I got my motorcycle license last February. My bf has always ridden sport bikes and he never thought I'd learn, after a few topples in the yard and driveway ending in scrapes and usually a few unkind words from me to him. But I surprised him and took the 2 day class on Superbowl weekend and it rained the whole time. He bought me a bike that summer and sadly a friend of his wrecked it, totally sober and on accident and not his fault. Do you know how to ride? I hate to say I always needed a little liquid courage to steady the shaky hands. Lord... glad to be here now!
I don't feel like I look that much different either. I DO feel so much more at peace and healthy internally so that makes for the physical differences I can't see.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,747
Wow I am so glad you got through the learning period and can ride! I’m so sorry about your bike though! That is a sobering thought! Get it... no I don’t know how to ride at all though. But I trust my friend will let me take my time... it just feels like the right time.
Dee, how are you? I’m sorry to hear that you haven’t been feeling well. I hope you will take time to recharge, we love you and need you but it must be taxing to be here for so many of us if you aren’t feeling well. You are in my thoughts, and that is often! I’ve been so grateful to be able to touch base with you off and on over these past 5 years!
Dee, how are you? I’m sorry to hear that you haven’t been feeling well. I hope you will take time to recharge, we love you and need you but it must be taxing to be here for so many of us if you aren’t feeling well. You are in my thoughts, and that is often! I’ve been so grateful to be able to touch base with you off and on over these past 5 years!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 2,747
Me again. Today was a tough one. Not cravings or triggers, but just on wobbly baby deer legs still with some situations. In my line of work, which I have a lot of experience with, it is common to sense that your boundaries are being compromised by those who are inebriated. It's the reality of the industry. And by boundaries I mostly mean personalities that are undesirable, rudeness, crudeness, looseness, etc being thrust into your sphere as the server. Behavior I've certainly been guilty of in the past myself. In my current restaurant, I luckily don't have to witness or deal with much of that but today I had a couple of examples wander in and I kind of felt new and inexperienced dealing with them with a clear head. Nothing happened other than I felt shocked at someone else's behavior, and it really held up a mirror to my face. It is a very educational experience. And I have no desire to act that way or appear that way again. You know, drunk. Gross.
So I sat after work with my friends who were still working and I had an NA beer and a side of macaroni and cheese. The kind of fix I needed was just to be surrounded by good supportive people. Then I came home to hide from the whole world which seems to be full of drunk jerks tonight.
This year I celebrate being 10 years clean from cocaine. For some reason, in my sobriety from alcohol, I'm actually realizing this much more clearly than ever. I have thought about it a lot today. In a lot of ways it is good. But in some ways I am wary of the feeling of success. I just need to put that out there, that I'm conscious of it more clearly than ever. It's a weird feeling. Like I've been in flight mode for so long, just running from the drug and now I'm realizing what I saved myself from. I have been very successful running from drugs. I hope I can run just as hard and fast blindly from this one last substance, and put as much distance between me and it as possible.
So I sat after work with my friends who were still working and I had an NA beer and a side of macaroni and cheese. The kind of fix I needed was just to be surrounded by good supportive people. Then I came home to hide from the whole world which seems to be full of drunk jerks tonight.
This year I celebrate being 10 years clean from cocaine. For some reason, in my sobriety from alcohol, I'm actually realizing this much more clearly than ever. I have thought about it a lot today. In a lot of ways it is good. But in some ways I am wary of the feeling of success. I just need to put that out there, that I'm conscious of it more clearly than ever. It's a weird feeling. Like I've been in flight mode for so long, just running from the drug and now I'm realizing what I saved myself from. I have been very successful running from drugs. I hope I can run just as hard and fast blindly from this one last substance, and put as much distance between me and it as possible.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,473
Congrats on your decade clean from Coke Plenny
When things got a little overwhelming for me, I tried to pare it back to the basics.
All I needed to do was stay sober - everything else fell in behind that.
D
When things got a little overwhelming for me, I tried to pare it back to the basics.
All I needed to do was stay sober - everything else fell in behind that.
D
Member
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: East Coast US
Posts: 1,837
Congrats on the 10 years clean, Plenny! That’s awesome.
GBE - I also have a brown thumb and have managed to kill succulents and other plants that supposedly need little care.
Dee -glad you are feeling better.
I arrived at my friends yesterday with no travel delays but arrived with a very bad cold. My throat is dry and scratchy and I am losing my voice. Not good when I have to give a presentation on Tuesday. Thankfully I travel with an arsenal of things like NyQuil, DayQuil, Advil, etc.
My friends had their one beer for happy hour at their pool and I had club soda with cranberry. I do not even have a desire to drink which is good. I am past that normal danger zone of the 8-9-10 dates and the three week mark so hopefully things continue on this same good path. Day 25 today.
All have a great Sunday.
GBE - I also have a brown thumb and have managed to kill succulents and other plants that supposedly need little care.
Dee -glad you are feeling better.
I arrived at my friends yesterday with no travel delays but arrived with a very bad cold. My throat is dry and scratchy and I am losing my voice. Not good when I have to give a presentation on Tuesday. Thankfully I travel with an arsenal of things like NyQuil, DayQuil, Advil, etc.
My friends had their one beer for happy hour at their pool and I had club soda with cranberry. I do not even have a desire to drink which is good. I am past that normal danger zone of the 8-9-10 dates and the three week mark so hopefully things continue on this same good path. Day 25 today.
All have a great Sunday.
Marchia in Aeternum
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Georgia
Posts: 11,094
On the subject of house plants: african violets are easy to kill. They require precise conditions. Like watering from the bottom.
You have to pick plants for the conditions you have. Light levels matter. And do your plants a favor: Pour your watering water 24 hours before to let the chlorine evaporate.
You have to pick plants for the conditions you have. Light levels matter. And do your plants a favor: Pour your watering water 24 hours before to let the chlorine evaporate.
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