Steely

I'm going to look up the "worry tree" right this minute.

You sound fantastic kenton. Back after I've checked out this tree.

Steely

You can hang out with me any old time kenton, and me you, I trust. .

Told you that first photo was a fluke .

You really do sound great kenton, and I found the 'worry tree' good as well. In itself it is really helpful, but it gives me a second benefit in that it tells me it's OK not to worry.

Like, if I'm not worrying I'm not giving family, life, people, the Irish Potato Famine enough thought, or I don't care about them, or something stupid like that.....shite!

When I did attend AA many moons ago I made friends with a really lovely woman (artist) who said to me that she even felt guilty about feeling happy because someone else mightn't be happy. Double shite, but I could relate.

I used 'worry tree' just now and put off organising the kitchen until tomorrow. I am still so very tired so gave myself permission to not worry about it and take things slowly. Feels good.

I remember when you were frozen out by your 'friends' and am so impressed with your farewelling the friend who delivered up a card to your daughter. How good was that! I hope your daughter is still doing well.

It would have been so easy to have been drawn back in but you didn't, realising that there was not much to offer out of the old life. Nixaroozie!

Same here kenton and I am not bored by this new life either, so many interesting things to do. I'm really exhausted, but can see the possibilities now and I'm going to be taking up on them all. What a waste is the grog!

Fancy you writing a book! Read the other day that a complete novice writer (Jane Harper, Australian) has just won some major prize with her book being made into a film.

She writes Crime Fiction and said, "I wasn't sure how to write a novel, I didn't know how you started it, or how you pulled all the pieces together to get to the end." So she took one of those 'writing courses', and the rest is history.

Really made me feel optimistic about the whole idea of writing. And as I improve hope to be able to put pen to paper myself, just gotta learn not to use too many commas. It's a bad habit of mine, think I might be over breathing.

It's really great kenton and you are powering. It was wonderful to read your post.

Hope all are doing as well. We're getting there Nobenders.

Hey, I was laughing to myself about you Nands saying that you hoped we hadn't driven all the men away. Should we be the Nogenders?

Wanted to say as well, in reference to National Health Scheme that Australia is not a Socialist country we have a conservative government in power but we still have a NHS. OK, I'll stop politics now, promise, until next time .

Love you all. xxx

Steely

I'm starting to believe, after doing the research, that my feelings of exhaustion are part contributable to quitting smoking. As a stimulant now removed tiredness and even exhaustion are well documented. Day 15 today and I am never going back.

Feel so second hand but apparently it does get better. I never take 'naps' we don't use that term much here, but can't remember what we do say concentration out the window.

Poppy79

Steely, you have such a friendly and beautiful look to you. Not sure why I had you pegged as having dark hair lol, blonde is a great colour on you. And what a gorgeous, cheeky smile.
It's kinda nice being able to visualise us nobenders, I get it's meant to be anonymous but I do love that I know what Nands and you look like. Might even throw up a selfie of me soon.
My smoking quit date is coming up, have decided to not buy anymore packs, have 2.5 packs left. I hope I have the same strength and resolve as you Steely to kick this habit in its butt. But I'm scared, have this failure feeling encompassing me at the moment. And I have a sore throat so I am praying I am not getting the dreaded flu.
Anyway just checking in and hoping you are all having a nice weekend. Mine is a bit meh, but they can't always be awesome I suppose.
xoxo

Steely

I've been thinking about you Poppy, so glad to see you are still rocking with the Nobenders. We're getting there sister.

I think the same in knowing what Nands looks like too, and it really doesn't matter to me that people have seen my face though understand why some might not.

Thanks for saying blonde suits me, but it's my natural grey or what I like to call 'ash blonde'

This giving up smoking has been difficult for me but am committed this time as have 'failed' many times in the past, just as with the grog. It's all learning guess I've just been slow at it.

I really am never returning to smoking if for no other reason than I despise the tobacco companies and have images in my mind of slaves picking tobacco on the plantations. Vile stuff.

I really wish you all success in quitting Poppy. Money saved is also a real eye opener.

Went back to the doctor today to get further results from x-rays taken after lifting that heavy potted plant. Turns out I did fracture a vertebra, no wonder I was in such excruciating pain. First x-ray following the injury was so inadequate they did not pick it up and sent me home with Ibuprofin and Panadol. Yeah right!

Really good to see you there Poppy and stick a selfie up if you choose. I reckon you've got short pixie cut blonde hair and blue eyes.

kenton

I hope your weekend got better Poppy. I also hope you're not getting the flu. I've been feeling really tired lately and today I woke up with a bad cough so I reckon I'm a bit ill. Nothing serious, just a bit run down. Think I might start taking vitamins. You know, it's a big change in me that I even notice I might be a bit ill. I must have got ill when I was drinking but I never took any notice of it. I was probably so used to feeling hungover and sick, I never paid any attention to proper illness. It's nice noticing that I don't feel quite right and taking a bit of care of myself. It makes me feel like I matter.

Seems like there's loads of nobenders quitting smoking. I stopped smoking 8 years ago and used a book and CD by Paul McKenna called Quit Smoking. It worked for me and my husband (who didn't even want to quit). Sounds like you've all got it under control but thought I'd just share what worked for me. Apologies if I'm breaking rules Dee...

Hope everyone is doing ok. All good here. No dramas to report and that in itself is worth reporting. Life is calm. I'm going to enjoy this calmness whilst it lasts. Love to everyone xxxx

Dee74

No worries Kenton - mentions are fine, just not links if it's a commercial thing...
D

Steely

Hi Kenton, hi Poppy, hi kev, hi Dee

Hey Nands Macklemore is out here supporting marriage equality and sang at one of our football grand finals. The Melbourne Storm won. Sorry about Queensland Poppy and Dee ha ha.

I don't follow Rugby League, yuk! He says he is going to give his share of monies earned to the YES Vote Campaign. How good's that!

Hope you are doing OK Nands.

Get well soon kenton. I'm really tired too but improving at last thank goodness, and feeling like I can think again. Sorta

Funny, and this sounds silly, but I have started yawning again in actual tiredness. I think I have just been crawling from pillar to post with gritted teeth.

Man, small mercies, it feels good to yawn.

kenton

Yippedy Doo Dah, Yippedy Day! I worked out how to use an avatar that's not one of the standard ones. This is a big deal for me and my rubbish phone. I'm so proud that my rubbish phone and I got our acts together and calmly worked this situation out. Took us a while but we got there. And this phone accidentally got dropped by my youngest son into a fish tank last week so that makes this recent success all the more impressive. Well done phone. And well done me

Sorry to hear about your fractured vertebra Steely. That sounds very serious. What can they do? Do you just have to wait for it to heal itself? Must be so painful. I'm thinking of you.

Off to bed now. Hope everyone is doing ok xxx

Dee74

I don't actually follow any sport so it's all just names to me Steely
'Grats on the avatar Kenton

D

Steely

I figured that Dee . I'm the same.

The fractured vertaba was excruciating kenton but it will heal over about 6 weeks. Pain is greatly reduced and was able to get a few things done today and my mental state improving. Pain really messes with your head.

Good about clinching the avatar kenton. Feels good when stuff like that happens.

Love to all xxx

Dee74

My family are very sporty - playing and watching.
I think I reacted against that

D

Plenny

Hi all,
Sounds like things are going well. Weight lost, cigarettes unsmoked, toxic friendships past, proper diagnoses made, I think there were many more good things. I am picking up the habit I once had as a child before my life spun out of control: listing all the positive things about myself, my life, and my loved ones. I really didn't realize I had started doing it again, or that I had ever done it, I guess. But I started feeling gratitude and confidence again.

I disappeared over the weekend because R and I spent a solid two days together. I generally don't sit and reflect here when I'm with him. I like to be 'alone' when I visit. Anyway, it was a very nice weekend. He has been off the sauce for about a week this time (hallelujah I love it when he is not drinking), and the time we spend together is intellectual and mindful and loving, I do not take these times for granted! We woke up on Saturday morning and had the idea to drive just out of town to a flea market which has just mountains of great junk plus excellent Honduran and Mexican food. We ate pupusas (I can explain if need be) and cups stuffed full of cut coconut, watermelon, and cucumber with lemon juice, salt, and chili powder (a delicacy). Then we had time to spare so we drove further into the swamp to a nature preserve and did a nature walk! We saw an alligator right away, and scores of orb weaver spiders and towering old cypress trees draped in spanish moss. We both love all of the sciences and history so this kind of activity is perfect for us to do together. Then on our way back to town I convinced him to stop at my favorite vietnamese restaurant where they serve a dish he has been looking for for years (tripe pho cooked to his taste), and he loved it and thanked me over and over again for making him stop to eat. Then this morning, we went to his boss's house to watch football (American but for some reason they were playing in England). Everyone else was drinking beer and wine all morning and drunk as skunks by 1:00, and we just had our coffee and snacks and left at the right time to go take a nap. It was very hard for him to watch everyone drinking, and very hard for me to watch football, but we had a nice time. I'm glad the socializing is over! And I'm extra glad we spent a healthy and enriching weekend together. It's times like these I can very clearly see a future together.
Sorry for the runon paragraph. I just wanted to list all the positive things about this weekend.
Kenton, the worry tree concept is helping everyone! I'm so happy you introduced us to it!
I'm home in the quiet by myself (well, the cat is here but we each keep to ourselves), and ready to spend two days making art and food. I feel like I am in heaven. Is this the dreaded Pink Cloud? I must be wary lest I get too confident. In the past I've slipped when I feel this way. But I'll try to let myself enjoy it too...

Plenny

Completely forgot to add that I haven't had a cigarette myself in 6 days. Not unusual for me, but I'm counting because I intend to make it stick this time.

Dee74

Hi Plenny - I never really had a pink cloud - to me it sounds like a kind of euphoria or joy in simply being sober- nothing wrong with that per se, but I think being content is a different thing

Steely

I'm with Dee on that one Plenny. I've always understood the pink cloud as being a euphoria simply attached to not drinking, but you and R seemed to have had a wonderful time in just 'being there' and enjoying the world as it reveals itself to you sober. Wow! Rock on world.

Yum, that coconut, cucumber, watermelon, chili powder, lemon cup of yummy sounds fabulous I'm thinking about trying it, but not sure of the ratios. Worth a shot, and as a scientist myself the fun in experimenting will not be wasted.
The ingredients are all pretty inexpensive and as I combined them in my mind found my inner chef.

The nature reserve, orb spiders and alligators, the flea market, oh Plenny who'd want to drink when these things are at hand? Had I been drinking I would have fallen into the swamp, then eaten by the alligator. These are such beautiful things Plenny and I am so happy for you.

The first paragraph of your post really touched me and could so relate to those times as a child when fairies lived in the moss and the world was grand, and all things were beautiful. Then, like you it all went wrong.

It reminded me of an English documentary made some time back which traced the lives of a group of children beginning at age seven. Every seven years the film makers would return to interview the children as they grow and aged. The series was called "Seven Up".

There was a little boy (age 7) who was so happy with the world, so positive and so filled with the wonder of life. He was a beautiful boy but as the series progressed he became the most unhappy, depressed, and I think he even became homeless.

I don't think alcohol or other drugs became a problem for him, maybe the wonder in his eyes as a child became washed away with the harsh realities of life. He was a sensitive little boy. Hope he got the wonder back just like you as you wandered through the nature reserve. You painted a beautiful picture.

We are all doing so well Plenny, thank you for such a beautiful post.

Steely

I reckon you're a bit of a sport Dee

Dee74

Thanks Steely

D

Plenny

Thanks Steely xo

Just here to brag about my breakfast this morning. I forgot that I have an immersion blender! I don't have a regular blender so I hadn't been making smoothies or blended soups or anything. Well last night I soaked a cup of raw cashews in 2 cups of water and then rinsed them well this morning. I added 1 cup of fresh water and blended it up to make a thick cream to use for soups or sauces or smoothies or coffee or desserts.
So with a little bit of that I added a frozen banana and some spinach and some chia seeds and blended it up right in my giant coffee mug. Wow!
Now I can blend up the squash and cauliflower and sweet potatoes into a nice soup too... I love fall and immersion blenders

Steely

Hey Plenny, I just leapt out of bed at 4:25am couldn't sleep having just read your post. I must be getting better, note operative word 'leapt'?

I've got an immersion blender too only I didn't know it was an immersion blender just this blade stick wand thing that has been lying in my kitchen drawer for a very long time.

I tried to use it ONCE and whatever I was trying to blend splattered all over me and the kitchen. I mustn't have immersed it deeply enough. My inner chef was in hibernation.

I'm making all of those scrumptious things you mention Plenny and I love immersion blenders too. And I love Spring.

Thanks Plenny you make really healthy inexpensive yummy things. Yoe!