Plenny

Poppy I know how you feel! I am in an active state of slipping and picking myself up, and I'm just glad you are picking yourself up! Keep breathing, and keep eating and drinking cool water or whatever nourishes you!

Kenton, how's it going? What does bad reaction to anesthetic mean? Sounds like she's ok though? Also, I meant to get back to you about this worry tree. Sounds like an excellent exercise that I might benefit from. Is it a diagram to meditate on or just a question you phrase to yourself? Thank you for sharing that, I am also a constant ball of worry.

Dee74

I'm glad your daughter is doing well now Kenton

Steely I remember thinking this place would never be my home and I'd never feel energetic again, but after a few weeks, all got a lot better

Hope you have a good worry free weekend Plenny

Good to have you back Poppy - we don't shoot our wounded, as they say

D

Plenny

Steely,
Moving always depresses me. I need very badly to feel safe, private, anonymous, etc. The upheaval makes me feel frazzled and uncomfortable, the new neighbors and new feng shui are always disturbing. And I have been moving every six months for the past three years. It has been very taxing.
I understand, but I think it's true that soon, as you settle in more and set your boundaries more, it'll get better.
I'm sorry you're feeling this way.

Poppy79

Doesn't look like I'm going to get time soon to actually log on via computer to respond to everyone.
Kenton - your post stuck out to me regarding your daughters op and bad reaction. I know this doesn't even come close to a child but my youngest fur baby had a bad reaction to anaesthetic and stopped breathing, vet had to use a machine to keep her alive for a few minutes ... when I was told this I started balling my eyes out.
I am so glad she is okay and understand how scary that must have been for you.
Thanks Plenny for your kind words too, sounds horrible but it's a small comfort knowing I'm not the only one who slips
xoxo

Plenny

Kenton I drew up a worry tree diagram off of the internet and just filling in the questions here in my journal helped so much. Thank you!
A therapist I consulted with recommended I try some DBT therapy for these overwhelming feelings I have... I've put out some more emails looking for more consultations

Steely

Well here is my new "angular bob" and new eyebrows all paid for by quitting smoking. Check the weary old eyes.

Thanks everyone for identifying with the horror of moving, it has been awful and reckon it does have to do with the feng shui of the whole thing Plenny. Feel completely discombobulated.

Poppy, I've lapsed so many times 'taint funny and so glad you remained. As Dee so accurately puts it "we don't shoot our wounded". If that were the case the firing squad would have gotten me years ago.

But this time I really do believe I've 'got it'. It no holds interest any longer as has always ended in disaster and not prepared or desire to put myself through such hell. For me, now, it's all about the mental stuff, life on life's terms. Hope I don't get too old before I grow up.

Just to enjoy the day no matter what life dishes up has now proven to be the better course. Finally worked out that the 'problem' I drank over will be there tomorrow only I'll feel shite faced for having drank over it. Double jeopardy.

Well this is Steely's head as promised. And my next door neighbour just dropped in and gave me a new show curtain which I really, really needed. Listening to some jazz and just trying to relax.

Love you all xxx

Steely

Well don't know what happened to that pic. Am I a box head?

Steely

Something went wrong. Is this worth it.

Steely

y

Not really worth it and think I posted my head on some other thread got so nervous. Try this then I'm packing it in

Steely

Na, I'm a box head by the look. Probably a good thing.

Dee74

They've made some security changes here which means that images with just a http instead of https may not post anymore Steely.

Might be the end of the road for tinypic here I think

I've got the pic and I'll see what I can do

D

badgerden

Quick check in to wish all a very wonderful Friday.

Thinking of you Poppy! I slipped last Sunday, was overwhelmed at a celebration dinner, and well,,, had a glass. Stopped it at that but damage was done, still kicking myself but not quite as hard.

Today is our last Basefit check in. I am bummed because I am sure I wont hit my 30 pound goal, but the year isnt over yet.

Hi Steely, Plenny, Kenton, Kev!!

Badge

Plenny

Steely that looks great! I love waves. My hair is so curly I have to work to just get a nice wave.

badgerden

Plenny what is DBT? and the worry tree diagram what is it and where do I find it? I am intrigued by it.

Steely--- Love your face! I instantly wanted to hang out somewhere with you!

Well guess what???? I met my Goal!!!!!! 30 lbs gone!! they are going to email me the rest, body mass, age etc so that I compare now to 6 months ago. Will let you know how that turns out, but for right now, I am on the moon, so happy with myself, on the right path. Tonight however,,,,,, PIZZA!!

A very happy Badge!

Plenny

DBT is Dialectical Behavior Therapy and it is supposed to help with boderline personality disorder. I want to see if I can afford to try it

I just googled Worry Tree and I saw a bunch of diagrams, all pretty much the same thing. It's a good way to count down and rationalize

Plenny

Congratulations on meeting your goal!

Steely

Losing 30 lbs is a lot of weight to lose badge, very impressive. I'm really happy for you as when I saw your little dancing emoticons could tell YOU were really happy. Hope you enjoyed your 'treat' pizza.

Good to reward ourselves (talkin' about me here) so long as alcohol is not the reward because I've come to see that's it's never a reward, it's a punishment.

Thanks for saying you would like to hang with me, and likewise you badge, but in so many ways we girls have been hanging together here for some time, picking ourselves up, dusting ourselves off and getting back to the task at hand. Never underestimate the power of a woman - Lucy

I'm going to check out the "worry tree" and DBT too Plenny and thanks for your kind words too. I worry sooo much. Had to close my iPad as soon as I read people saying nice things about me, and started crying.

Man, my tree will be so high it will outstrip Jack's beanstalk That dumb giant at the top might just turn out to be an illusion and we find the secret to self. And in my case it's not all that interesting, but hope it will at least enable me to watch the cricket in peace. I cry so much.

I haven't read anything about the "worry tree", so really don't know what I'm talking about so please forgive me.

That was so lovely with the man paying for your bill in the doctor's surgery Nands. And you do pass kindnesses on just by being here with us, you do it all the time.

Again, I am tiring (still in bed 8:40am) this exhaustion is taking a while to abate but thought I would share with you all a quote from the beginning of a book I bought yesterday.

It is a biography by one of my favourite authors ever, Gabriel Garcia Marquez. It's called "Living to Tell the Tale". Sound familiar? .

Love you all xxx

Steely

Hey Dee, thanks for going to the trouble of working out my pic dilemma. For a moment there I thought I'd gotten out of it with legitimate reasons

You are very kind.

Dee74

Hope everyone has a good weekend

D

kenton

Great photo Steely! Can I hang out with you too?

Badge, 30lbs weigh loss is fan -flippin'- tastic!! You have every right to feel super proud. Awesome job. Well done xx

Plenny, I've been visualising my Xmas-shaped worry tree every time I worry and it has been helping me so much. Something about saying in my head, 'can I do anything about this worry?' And then if the answer is 'no' I let the worry go and think about something else. It's so simple but it works. Life doesn't have to be one constant worry about stuff that might not happen. Worry should be a temporary state used to help us problem solve current, real issues. I mentioned the worry tree to my kids and showed them the diagram. All of them said, 'why would we worry about something that probably won't happen?' My husband said the exact same thing too! I'm living in a house with well-adjusted, logical folk. Thank goodness I've got enough issues for all of us!!

So yesterday one of my old drinking buddies turned up with a card for my daughter. She'd heard my daughter has been in hospital. It was a lovely gesture and took me by surprise because I haven't spoken to this friend for months. We used to be really close but when I tried to explain to her why I was stopping drinking almost a year ago, she sided with my other drinking buddies who all froze me out and talked **** about me. It was a horrible time. I felt really lonely but I've picked myself back up and started making new friendships with non-toxic people and I'm feeling happy and strong.

So seeing this old friend was a shock. She stayed for a while and as she was leaving she said, 'I really miss you'. I miss her too, in a way. But I don't miss all the drinking and the black outs and the drunken misunderstandings and arguments and drama. Life is calm now and I love it. It's not boring like I always thought life without alcohol would be. It's packed full with new interests and hobbies (have I mentioned I'm writing a book? - I'm loving it). So I gave my old friend a hug and said goodbye. Because I know that letting her back in will mean a gradual chipping away at my sober defences and I'm not risking my sobriety for anything or anyone. No way.

And I'm not even worrying about it because I'm using the worry tree and the worry tree is working. Life is good

Hope everyone has a great weekend, love to everyone xxxxx