Class of March 2016 Support Thread Part One
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 299
Originally Posted by duderwit 
Hi everybody,
I'd like to join your March 2016 class. I'm a 30 year old husband and teacher, and I've been struggling with alcoholism for as long as I can remember. I've been an on-off member on here for a few years, but mostly just used it to read when I was feeling hungover and guilty.
In college, I used to be able to hide it and just say "I'm doing the cool college party thing". Even after college, I would tell myself "Hey, you're still young". But now I'm 30 and married to someone who doesn't drink. I have a tendency to get drunk and insult her verbally. I say ridiculous things like "You're just a spoiled rich kid"....even though neither of us are rich or anything. I can't even imagine how upsetting that is for her. And the thing is we never argue or anything unless I'm drunk, and then I just tell her silly insults like that.
This morning, I woke up hung over from a 2 day bender and missing 2 days of work (I told my work that I was sick, I guess technically that's true, but it still adds to my guilt list). I decided that I really need a support system (I have none). I'm hoping to get some support through this group. If anyone would like to chat or has a similar situation, please send me a message.
I'd like to join your March 2016 class. I'm a 30 year old husband and teacher, and I've been struggling with alcoholism for as long as I can remember. I've been an on-off member on here for a few years, but mostly just used it to read when I was feeling hungover and guilty.
In college, I used to be able to hide it and just say "I'm doing the cool college party thing". Even after college, I would tell myself "Hey, you're still young". But now I'm 30 and married to someone who doesn't drink. I have a tendency to get drunk and insult her verbally. I say ridiculous things like "You're just a spoiled rich kid"....even though neither of us are rich or anything. I can't even imagine how upsetting that is for her. And the thing is we never argue or anything unless I'm drunk, and then I just tell her silly insults like that.
This morning, I woke up hung over from a 2 day bender and missing 2 days of work (I told my work that I was sick, I guess technically that's true, but it still adds to my guilt list). I decided that I really need a support system (I have none). I'm hoping to get some support through this group. If anyone would like to chat or has a similar situation, please send me a message.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 299
Originally Posted by Dee74
Hi mrskw - for a while after I stopped drinking my brain was still at war with itslef - it got disappointed when I beat a craving and it wanted to drink when I had every reason in the world not too.
I stuck to my guns tho - my mind and body healed and eventually all cylinders were firing again.
I don't know how long you drank for - but give yourself a little time to change, heal and grow
D
I stuck to my guns tho - my mind and body healed and eventually all cylinders were firing again.
I don't know how long you drank for - but give yourself a little time to change, heal and grow
D
It's been a lot longer than I first realized, but it escalated hugely about four and half months ago.
I will give myself time, thank you for your support and kindness I hope I can reciprocate.
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,457
Originally Posted by FacingFuture
Hey all,
I'd love to join the class if you'll have me. I've been sober since my one day slip last month. Even made it through REALLY tough triggers (flew on a "redeye" flight with 5 screaming kids around me; had to give a presentation with ~40mins of sleep).
My question for the group is: how do you deal with a SO that is looking for you to trip up? I made it through all the work nonsense and then my wife accused me of drinking some wine out of her bottle, then thought she saw beer cans in the trash when they were really "le Croix" (mineral water). I'm still new at this stuff, but it seems hard!
I'd love to join the class if you'll have me. I've been sober since my one day slip last month. Even made it through REALLY tough triggers (flew on a "redeye" flight with 5 screaming kids around me; had to give a presentation with ~40mins of sleep).
My question for the group is: how do you deal with a SO that is looking for you to trip up? I made it through all the work nonsense and then my wife accused me of drinking some wine out of her bottle, then thought she saw beer cans in the trash when they were really "le Croix" (mineral water). I'm still new at this stuff, but it seems hard!
I don't know about you but I lied to my loved ones and hid a lot of my drinking. I made promise that I genuinely meant to keep - but didn't.
That lack of trust took a while to rebuild.
I'm not saying it's right for your wife to accuse you or that you deserve that treatment, but if you were anything like I was maybe you can understand a little more where your wife might be coming from.
My guess is she's scared and worried about you - but it doesn't always come out that way?
D
AlmA
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: Marbella Spain
Posts: 714
Good morning all!
Please keep doing things it helps.
And hug all you can!!!
Write all you can, walk all you can!!!
Do a list of what always left for TOMORROW!
and start crossing.
Do not be lazy get a pen and start the list!
Helps tones...
Hope you squeeze the day!
XO
Please keep doing things it helps.
And hug all you can!!!
Write all you can, walk all you can!!!
Do a list of what always left for TOMORROW!
and start crossing.
Do not be lazy get a pen and start the list!
Helps tones...
Hope you squeeze the day!
XO
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 28
Originally Posted by Mrskw
Not feeling at all confident about myself today. 
You can do this. You dont have to think about forever. Just think about now and what is important now.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 299
Originally Posted by humbug68
I wasnt feeling confident this afternoon either. Remember what matters. Also remember that if you give in, how will the next few days play out? How will you feel at 2am. You can do this. You dont have to think about forever. Just think about now and what is important now.
Thank you so much; really going hour by hour today. I hope you're feeling better now. We can do this.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2016
Posts: 28
Just know that we are all feeling the same way and no matter how strong it feels at the time, all cravings pass. Im fine thanks, cravings passed around 5pm (between about 1pm-5pm is danger zone where I start thinking about it). Im off to bed shortly and day 7 tomorrow. The only time I have gone this long is when I was pregnant! You have got this
Member
Join Date: Mar 2016
Posts: 299
Originally Posted by humbug68
Just know that we are all feeling the same way and no matter how strong it feels at the time, all cravings pass. Im fine thanks, cravings passed around 5pm (between about 1pm-5pm is danger zone where I start thinking about it). Im off to bed shortly and day 7 tomorrow. The only time I have gone this long is when I was pregnant! You have got this
Thank you for your support, we have got this.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Valley of the Sun, AZ
Posts: 3,458
Originally Posted by Mrskw
I think part of the problem today is that it feels like so much longer than three days. You're right; I would not feel good at all.
Thank you so much; really going hour by hour today. I hope you're feeling better now. We can do this.
Thank you so much; really going hour by hour today. I hope you're feeling better now. We can do this.
I think someone else posted here just a short while to make a list of things to do. It doesn't have to be "climb Mount Everest" type of stuff. One of the things I am doing today is putting up new blinds in my daughters bedroom. Pretty easy, right? But something I would usually put off if I had a big head from the night before.
And yes, we can do this😄
MITA
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,447
Welcome 5upersonic!
Mrskw and humbug, I think confidence wavering is normal and we are all going through it. Sometimes I've had wavering confidence because I had loose ends I hadn't tied up, bottles I needed to pour out, people I needed to tell I wasn't drinking, etc. Most of the time though, it just a dirty trick of the subconscious and it passes. glad we are all here.
Mrskw and humbug, I think confidence wavering is normal and we are all going through it. Sometimes I've had wavering confidence because I had loose ends I hadn't tied up, bottles I needed to pour out, people I needed to tell I wasn't drinking, etc. Most of the time though, it just a dirty trick of the subconscious and it passes.
glad we are all here.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Western New York
Posts: 2,447
Originally Posted by Applekat
Keep playing the tape, nmd.
You won't regret NOT drinking, when you wake up refreshed and clear headed tomorrow morning!
You won't regret NOT drinking, when you wake up refreshed and clear headed tomorrow morning!
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