Class of October 2014 Part 21
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,697
Yes! Baggage free feels awesome. I find I'm actually more friendly and willing to talk to neighbors now. Being able to look people in the eyes with confidence is such a great feeling that never gets old.
And what a cool idea, Arbor! Sounds like a lot of fun!
We decided to skip the evening party (woohoo! No booze battle!) and walked ALL over the neighborhood tonight trick or treating with Jr. and a few of the kids from the block. Then we event back to the house and cozied up on the couch with college football and way too much candy. The mummy pizzas were a total hit. And everyone was full and tuckered out by 10:30. I'm now back at my place and ready to grab that extra hour of sleep we get with the time change tonight. Zzzzzzzzz
Gnight all!
And what a cool idea, Arbor! Sounds like a lot of fun!
We decided to skip the evening party (woohoo! No booze battle!) and walked ALL over the neighborhood tonight trick or treating with Jr. and a few of the kids from the block. Then we event back to the house and cozied up on the couch with college football and way too much candy. The mummy pizzas were a total hit. And everyone was full and tuckered out by 10:30. I'm now back at my place and ready to grab that extra hour of sleep we get with the time change tonight. Zzzzzzzzz
Gnight all!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 673
BD ~ so, major drama....Greys wasn't on....kidding. There are so many shows to watch it hardly matters. But I was really disappointed. I still have not recovered from George dying.
As for the mini snickers, had one today. Craft show I was at a vendor had them on her table. Her son told me me that he had five 'cause he was five. I told him if that's the way it works, I've got a LOT of candy to eat.
As for the mini snickers, had one today. Craft show I was at a vendor had them on her table. Her son told me me that he had five 'cause he was five. I told him if that's the way it works, I've got a LOT of candy to eat.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,697
BD, I think I ate my age in candy this week...And it's mostly because I love the weird gummy stuff that Jr and his friends rejected... Dots, tootsie rolls, Swedish fish... Yum!
The family farm was like a swamp land. I'm happy to be home, dry, and warm now. i hope everyone's doing well tonight/day!
The family farm was like a swamp land. I'm happy to be home, dry, and warm now. i hope everyone's doing well tonight/day!
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 6,831
Hi gang. Today's rain kept me in and I got completely engrossed with genealogy research online. I've not done much of that and it really draws you in.
I'm beginning to look forward to Thanksgiving. Last year's was tough and I'm ready to do this one up proper.
Calling this day done (can't believe I'm still up) and wishing the team a great start to the week!
I'm beginning to look forward to Thanksgiving. Last year's was tough and I'm ready to do this one up proper.
Calling this day done (can't believe I'm still up) and wishing the team a great start to the week!
02.27.15 :): ▽VII△VIII
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,802
Hey guys.
So I’ve been fighting this pretty hard for the past couple weeks, but truth is bipolar got me like
And I know this is how it goes, but I’m really disappointed. Now I’m going to have to struggle again. I already feel like everything is out of control, like I can’t keep up with basic life, like there’s too much happening at once, and happening too fast. Instead of maintaining things smoothly, things seem to happen suddenly. I turn around and boom the dishes are piled up. Boom we have no clean laundry. Boom we are out of groceries. But at the same time, days seem to last for years, and I watch the clock waiting for bedtime so I can take my pills and go to sleep. Why I can’t manage to use all that time productively…I don’t know.
I lost all this weight, and now it’s going to be super hard to maintain it. I’ve tried to keep myself up on insane quantities of caffeine, but that isn’t cutting it anymore. I’m starting to binge on carbs, which is my body’s attempt to balance serotonin, which leads to panic over gaining weight, which leads to some real gross weight control tactics, and I don’t need these kinds of problems.
I keep telling my husband and daughter to slow down, I can only do one thing at a time. I get frustrated. I feel like I have too much to do when it’s really only two things, but I feel like those two things are going to take forever. And being super irritated with my daughter all the time, and hearing myself being such a bitch to her, and hating myself even more because of it. And hiding from my family and friends because I’m somehow completely incapable of simply being a decent human being.
A month ago I felt like real super cool, and now I just feel like a useless basketcase that’s always going to be a problem. I hate watching this happen and having so little power over it. It’s like hitting the brakes and then riding out the slow-motion skid into the brick wall. Yep, hitting it, right about now.
So I’ve been fighting this pretty hard for the past couple weeks, but truth is bipolar got me like
And I know this is how it goes, but I’m really disappointed. Now I’m going to have to struggle again. I already feel like everything is out of control, like I can’t keep up with basic life, like there’s too much happening at once, and happening too fast. Instead of maintaining things smoothly, things seem to happen suddenly. I turn around and boom the dishes are piled up. Boom we have no clean laundry. Boom we are out of groceries. But at the same time, days seem to last for years, and I watch the clock waiting for bedtime so I can take my pills and go to sleep. Why I can’t manage to use all that time productively…I don’t know.
I lost all this weight, and now it’s going to be super hard to maintain it. I’ve tried to keep myself up on insane quantities of caffeine, but that isn’t cutting it anymore. I’m starting to binge on carbs, which is my body’s attempt to balance serotonin, which leads to panic over gaining weight, which leads to some real gross weight control tactics, and I don’t need these kinds of problems.
I keep telling my husband and daughter to slow down, I can only do one thing at a time. I get frustrated. I feel like I have too much to do when it’s really only two things, but I feel like those two things are going to take forever. And being super irritated with my daughter all the time, and hearing myself being such a bitch to her, and hating myself even more because of it. And hiding from my family and friends because I’m somehow completely incapable of simply being a decent human being.
A month ago I felt like real super cool, and now I just feel like a useless basketcase that’s always going to be a problem. I hate watching this happen and having so little power over it. It’s like hitting the brakes and then riding out the slow-motion skid into the brick wall. Yep, hitting it, right about now.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: East Coast USA
Posts: 120,877
((((Briar, sweetheart)))). I don't know much about bi-polar disease but it sounds like you are on the low side of the spectrum.
Have you called your therapist; maybe a change in meds is in order?????
Have you called your therapist; maybe a change in meds is in order?????
Member
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: German Village, Columbus with my love ♥
Posts: 88,521
This cycle is hell on you Briar; I know that.
So please listen: yes, you need to call your therapist.
No, it has not been a month that you have been out of control...maybe a few days, a week at most. You have been doing brilliantly. You are an awesome mom, and you have been doing a terrific job with A on every level.
You have been sober far longer now, and you might just level out here a lot faster than other times.
It's going to be OK.
You will get through this.
Love you very much!! ♥
So please listen: yes, you need to call your therapist.
No, it has not been a month that you have been out of control...maybe a few days, a week at most. You have been doing brilliantly. You are an awesome mom, and you have been doing a terrific job with A on every level.
You have been sober far longer now, and you might just level out here a lot faster than other times.
It's going to be OK.
You will get through this.
Love you very much!! ♥
Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 5,554
Briar, talk to your therapist or Doctor. Nobody gets it all done all the time. Maybe your mania has you getting so much done that when you are back to a typical pace, you feel inadequate. But it's not true. That's just regular! You are a wonderful mom and person.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2014
Posts: 1,697
It couldn't have been said better, friends. You're having a bad week, not months, not year, not life. Calling your therapist is a wise decision. And be kind to yourself. You can only do so much. And if you know you're going to say something that you'll regret, I don't see anything wrong with retreating to your bedroom or the tub or the park for a bit. Love you lots, Briar.
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